venting

[finite flower]

Both

[forest pivot]

LITERALLY

ISTG I AM THIS CLOSE TO LETTING A PERSON OUT OF MY LIFE... He just has one recording which I need to get rid of...

[proven pond]

literally fuck??

how old are you to be doing these naughty things

[forest pivot]

LMFAO ITS NOT LIKE THAT

ITs just a conversation

Its all sfw but just has some wrong mentions of people and ugbkwtqbhnntnj

[forest pivot]

Stop spoling my reputation 🙄

[forest pivot]

I'm 14 ffs

15* still used to saying 14

Aaayoo nice

totally didn't realize

https://tenor.com/view/high-sir-salute-respect-yessir-yeah-gif-15588688

[cosmic ginkgo]

shit wrong channel

[proven pond]

then nobody cares

[forest pivot]

Time to learn hacking and then delete the video from his laptop

Aight

Night hoomans

[viscid gull]

I matter.

just made up of matter -_-

[midnight crest]

Fuuuuuuck me

I enrolled late cus the preference period was during a busy time and now two tutorials are full

[mild compass]

damn

why did you wait

[midnight crest]

Covid

[wicked turret]

Guys...do you feel like the world has turned 180°?

Like new problems are popping up everywhere and old problems have gotten worse?

[gleaming sable]

nope

[pastel lark]

yes

everything is rubbish like last year, the world has lost hope of covid ending anytime soon

and theres a huge leak in my ceiling so the roofs probably gonna cave in

thank you for coming to my ted talk

[kindred stone]

I’m here gunna burst my brain out

[mild compass]

My school gonna conduct igcse in feb march lol

[merry yarrow]

nic

e

[wicked turret]

Y not?

[ripe lance]

are you in India?

cuz i heard that the feb-march igcse is exclusively for India only

[lament cloud]

Yeah it is

But I think a few surrounding countries as well

I remember someone in Nepal also said he's giving the Feb March exams

[mild compass]

yus this year it expanded a bit to include other countries

cause covid

[mild compass]

I live under a rock

so you must be patrick

[finite flower]

lol

[ripe lance]

prob the Indian subcontinent

[ripe lance]

why did patrick start looking like gumball

[mild compass]

Wha

[ripe lance]

his pfp

[mild compass]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/856811468347670528/864469944825544714/845495072169918467.gif

[mild compass]

Since the beginning of time. They both were long lost twins. Some supernatural force turned one into a cat the other to a starfish

And now the live in different worlds

The love

[ripe lance]

the Love

[mild compass]

the Love is real

[ripe lance]

It sure is

[mint plover]

I'm guilty and I don't know what I even did to feel that way

[halcyon hollow]

Does anyone have the newest edition of textbook for Cambridge AS Level biology, chemistry, physics and mathematics?

[coarse vapor]

Chemistry: https://drive.google.com/file/d/10fDb2Iw9RRrctLxH2BEfNC2AufCj5vtm/view?usp=drivesdk

Physics: https://drive.google.com/file/d/10i4KvEGdYsPr_8nnAQwMBHODizfruTKH/view?usp=drivesdk

You could also check at #resource-request

[kindred stone]

Why I’m venting?

In*

[halcyon hollow]

wait

ohhh

lol wrong chat

this whole time i was looking for where did I ask for the resources

lol i didnt know i was asking over here

[halcyon hollow]

thanks btw

[kindred stone]

dw dw dont do it next time

[gleaming sable]

No

[mild compass]

No I will do it next time

[merry yarrow]

[kindred stone]

I will /ban you

[mild compass]

[kindred stone]

Why did it send 2 times

[mild compass]

strange

but

U cannot ban

only mute

https://cdn.discordapp.com/emojis/511467044097622016.gif?v=1https://cdn.discordapp.com/emojis/511467044097622016.gif?v=1https://cdn.discordapp.com/emojis/511467044097622016.gif?v=1

[merry yarrow]

[forest pivot]

Sir, we can.

[mild compass]

yes you can, waffles can't

im talking about waffles

anyways just all jokes

[forest pivot]

Even he can, iirc

[mild compass]

okayy

[kindred stone]

Heh

[velvet sierra]

Hello guys

Ok so

I’m starting to doubt my abilities in academics haha - maybe cuz its school holidays but i cant be arsed studying although i have been keeping up with the holiday homework (for economics i just practically cheated my way through 2/5ths of it but that its like i just missed this great studying and knowledge opportunity because they were past exam papers) - i feel guilty asf but idk what to do about it. And last holiday i missed an entire unit of eco cuz i cheated and copied all the answers as well. The ideal thing would be to sit my ass down and get shit down but its so painful and feels like its gonna take ages and so much effort although if i break it up into smaller sections it’ll be easier but i dont know if i can lol. Same thing with computer science - everything else is fine

[finite flower]

uh hello?

not here

[merry yarrow]

lmao

[wet yoke]

I was venting

[finite flower]

oh

well then

[viscid gull]

"everything else is fine"

[velvet sierra]

Hell yeah i sleep like 7-9 hours and my academics are average except computer science and i think eco is gonna degrade

[viscid gull]

das nice, dont start doubting in ur academic abilities, just try progressing slowly, pretty sure its gonna work out at d end, and remember u cant be a human if everything is perfect, so dont worry (:

[velvet sierra]

Yo thanks

I just have to sit myself down and get stuff done lol

[viscid gull]

yup, das the spirit!!

[rain bridge]

you good bro

[finite flower]

what

u good fam

[rain bridge]

he probably isn't??

[mild compass]

bruh

tf

report + ban

@tawdry star

[rain bridge]

wait me??

[mild compass]

not you bruh

[rain bridge]

or the school shooting??

[merry yarrow]

I do not

[rain bridge]

ok good i got a bit confused lmao

[mild compass]

people dont normally makes jokes about killing people

[merry yarrow]

Venting =/ to Threatening

[mild compass]

i mean by any means, this is too far right

[merry yarrow]

lamo

the dude has been on this server for a while

pretty active

[tawdry star]

Thanos ban @mild compass for "Breaking rule 5"

[merry yarrow]

F

[last estuary]

🔨 Banned Kurenai#6009 indefinitely

[merry yarrow]

come to #semi-colon

[rain bridge]

that ended quickly

[tawdry star]

There's nothing funny about it

Ken

Let's drop the convo

[flint geyser]

god i really dont even know what i want to study anymore. everyday i lose more interest in cs/ds [what im applying for] and im on the verge of just hating them now. every so often i wish i went into something else - politics or astrophysics - and rn im seriously wishing id chosen music as a career path. i enjoy it, im passionate about it, i wish id wanted to play professionally in an orchestra as a career, though i know if i had i probably wouldve regretted it as well. but i dont remember why i chose cs and over the years ive just lost all interest in it, i fucking hate maths, and i kinda dont want to do anything at all with my life

[mild compass]

maybe take a gap year?

[wooden seal]

oof

[flint geyser]

thank you <3 unfortunately a gap year isnt a option given my family and pressure and everything... but this was really reassuring to hear

[lament cloud]

zn5

[olive wadi]

Not really a vent but , How do y'all get to studying a topic or chapter you dont enjoy or even hate? It really kills my motivation when i have to study something i dont like or enjoy , but i have to anyway. I'm a really pationate person so i do most things with passion , and it kills my mood to be forced to study topics i dont like , so whats a good way of getting around that?

Theres this topic i should of finished long ago , its almost been a week and im barely half way there... Helppp

[flint geyser]

i don't 👍 adhd vibes this is gonna sound overcomplicated but you just have to make it as easy on your brain as possible.
1 - i dunno if you prefer silence, but i put on REALLY loud music sometimes when i need to work, and my sister prefers white noise. you could try experiment to see what helps you focus
2 - make your notes pretty. personally it realy satisfies me to have stuff in different colours, highlighted, in good handwriting, etc. it's just satisfying for me regardless of what i'm writing so idk might help
3 - try the pomodoro timer method. you might know it, if not, it's basically where you work in periods and then take breaks. eg work for 15 minutes, break for 5, work again, etc. i like to start with 15 minutes and build up to 1-2 hours without breaks, and increase my break time from 2/5 minutes to 15/20. i also have an app called flora that helps with this, it basically sets a timer and grows a plant :D if you leave the app then the plant dies but at the end of the time you've set it gives you different plants so that does wonders for my adhd brain
4 - reward yourself! it can be really dumb things but tell yourself 'if i finish reading this page i will go get a cookie' or something and if you have the urge to get up just remind yourself 'no i have to finish this before i can go get a cookie' etc

that was longer than i expected oops but yeah just try different things and see what helps you most !!

[olive wadi]

1- Yes i prefer white noise and i already have a playlist for it on my spotify , thanks for reminding! i totally forgot about it
2- obviously having good looking notes is satisfying but tbh i dont mind it that much and for me its a huge waste of time , as long as its readable and i get necessary info from it , i dont mind it , doesnt bring me much motivation
3- oh yes i heard about this technique , not the method name , but regardless it sounds good i will try this thank you
4- hahah i do this too much now honestly , since its summer i take way too much time off to play games or eat stuff , really i feel like the summer vibe makes u work so much slower and less motivated , u just wanna relax you know , but regardless this is very important and i will continue doing it
Overall you make a great point so thank you i will try these and hopefully can get over the obstacles that are the topics i dont like doing

It just feels like studying in summer is 10 times harder than any other season bec everyone is on vacation and the weather is hot all the time , so you just feel like chilling and playing , for the first time in a while i actually run into these problems , i was fine throughout the year. God i hate summer

[flint geyser]

definitely agreed, it's realllllllllllly hot here so i just want to do nothing all day :( glad i could help !!

[olive wadi]

[sleek bay]

I feel like I am having something wrong with my mental health at the moment... I have been a "weird kid", "the outlier" growing up. In kindergarten, while other kids play together at the slides, the see-saw, all of that stuff, I always sit alone in a corner and live my own world. The same things happen when I was in Primary, Secondary and High School, while the whole class is following a common trend, doing probably everything together, I always end up in the minority side of the class. I was bullied, scolded in school as a result. Now, I am in Grade 12, aka just 1 year before I have to enter a university, and I don't want to do anything like what I did anymore. I am afraid of expressing my own self, I have difficulties revealing too much of myself anywhere, I have anxiety being my own person in front of other people, I became a much quieter, much less expressive and much less confident person than who I was. That's when I started being a video game addict, and the more I play video games, I feel like I was me again. But there are also consequences: I became even less confident in real life, to the point I am scared of expressing my own thoughts in front of my own parents because I am afraid that they will judge me and scold me like how I was treated at school in the past. Don't get me wrong, I have been an energetic kid before, and willing to express my own opinion, my own self in front of other people, but now I just don't want to do those wonderful things anymore... what should I do?

[flint geyser]

on the route of mental health, if you feel you are facing mental health issues, it would be advised to talk to a therapist or a psychiatrist - don't jump to conclusions, but this is one symptom of depression and a potential indicator of neurodivergency [adhd/asd]. maybe look into those, if you think they might be reasons, see if anything really clicks, but definitely talk to a professional about it. when it comes to doing things you like, start by dedicating them small amounts of time a day - eg if you liked/think you like drawing, but can't find motivation for it or such, maybe draw one thing one day and spend five minutes on it. do that for a week, fill a page with five minute doodles, and then try ten minutes. fifteen. half an hour. build up to an hour of drawing a day, or whatever it is you like, and do this with multiple activities. if after three months you still can't get into it - chances will be, rather than not getting into it, you just find it boring or don't like it - then maybe drop it. but what you do like, you'll be able to continue doing

[olive wadi]

I went thru the same things you did , and i had a lot of terrible things happening in my life , i was a huge introvert , i forgot how to smile from never smiling , no one ever knew anything about me and at school they thought im just a simple happy dude doing his thing. I beat my depression and problems by spending time on my mental health for like a whole year. Being stuck at home in covid i said to myself this is when i improve myself while the whole world is stuck at home. Self motivation and improvement comes in many many different ways you must explore all the traditional methods and find your own salvation. Some do it thru meditation , walks in the park , working out , some even do it thru religion. You must find your own way and embrace yourself and trust yourself , perhaps the tragidies you went thru made u introverted and closed off to other ppl , but its on you to open those doors. Sure you can go to a therapist but i beat my depression without any professional help and im super healthy now.

Try spending more time outside taking fresh air by walking/running , try spending more time with family , try spending more time with friends (irl if possible) , the better you feel mentally AND physically , the more open you will become about your feelings to others. You can even try to write it down on a piece of paper everyday how you feel and what you think about , slowly and gradually start telling it to your parents or close people. Find new hobbies! No matter what the method or circumstance keep trying and trying until u find the perfect method that suits YOU , i cannot give you the exact solution but its out there and its not that hard to find , u must just keep trying. You got this 💪

[pastel lark]

so a couple of activists/minor celebs DM’d me when I accidentally said something wrong about them

and now I can’t stop thinking that they all hate me

stupid thing to be upset about i know

[gleaming sable]

press the 3 dots on the top right

and press the "block" button

should solve your problem

[pastel lark]

Lol maybe I will

[kindred stone]

orr

turn it off

[pastel lark]

thanks! it was on ig btw

anyway in the grand scheme of things it doesn't really matter

they're just another of the 7.8 bn people on earth no matter how many followers they have

[olive wadi]

eh i personally dont give a damn about celebrities nor do i care who thinks what about me , i suggest not to think about it you know it aint worth it

Block button never fails ya 👍

[pastel lark]

thanks guys

it probably shows how sad my life is that this means so much to me…

but you all really cheered me up 😊

[cosmic ginkgo]

It's easy to let these things affect you, don't beat yourself up about it

[olive wadi]

theres more negativity in life than positivity , you must embrace the good things and the positive stuff more than the negatives , which is something we all cant do at all times but should be trying to do so , your life isnt sad you just think/believe it is , once you embrace the good things it wont feel like this , but glad to be of any help

[olive wadi]

Well if you dont want any advice i will try not to offer any , however heres the thing , you are going thru depression and pain bec of some events that happened in your life right , theres a cause to it sometihng triggered it. A good way of approaching this would be to find its root cause and sort it out from there , identifying the problem is the first step in solving it , in this case what problem(s) caused ur depression.

If you want to succeed academically you need to get ur lifestyle in order in a healthy fashion , i may not know much about you but if u are staying awake till 5am just so the night feels longer , it means you lack a healthy lifestyle. This isnt just for academics tho , in general if you want to be happy you must earn it (as stupid as that sounds its true) , you need to get up and fight back , it took me a year and half or so to beat my depression which was a result of many tragedies and problems stacking up over the years. What im tryna get at is , You can achieve happiness and success but you must be willing to do so , know that many many many ppl go thru depression and have terrible things going on in their life but some people pull it all back together like me , so can you! If its gonna inspire/help you i can always later share my story but overall know that to beat depression you must first want to beat it and start taking steps towards it , i can try my best to help you with that but at the end im just a stranger online , so its upto you to do the work, life is much better than it seems.

If you ever want to talk about something my DMs are open , or you can drop by here again , we here to support each other through tough times

[flint geyser]

i have depression as well, so if you ever need any tips/hacks, or just to talk, or anything, feel free to ping me. i won't offer advice since i know unsolicited advice is super annoying. just hang in there. i hope your psychiatrist appointment goes well, and try get some rest if you can <3 things will work out, i promise

[lavish geode]

guys my bestie blocked me

what to do

[flint geyser]

do you know why?

[lavish geode]

yea lol

[flint geyser]

then talk to them ig

if it was a misunderstanding or anything, communication is always good

[lavish geode]

No we fought

But not as bad as blocking

But she's stubborn and just like that

But I miss 😞

But self respect she blocked

But 😫😫😩😩

[olive wadi]

what

[lavish geode]

Ur single ass will never understand the pain dw

[kindred stone]

lol

just wait for a couple of days

if it goes on she took it to heart or something

else its light

[tawdry star]

This has happened to me so

[lavish geode]

It's been more than a couple of days 😩

Pugs you're good with girls tell me how to get her back

[kindred stone]

ahahhaha

that's one thing he isnt good at

[tawdry star]

...

[lavish geode]

WATCH IT BUEDY

[tawdry star]

• Make sure you understand what went wrong
• Apologize
• Try to show them that you understand what happened and are willing to fix it and have alr started working on it
• Try talking to those close to them
• This takes time so be patient

[lavish geode]

It wasn't my fault she's just stubborn and annoying

Big ego idiot

[tawdry star]

Then yes

Time

[lavish geode]

Mkay

Ty pugs for sharing your knowledge in women

[tawdry star]

Did you try talking to your mutuals?

[tawdry star]

....

[lavish geode]

None

[tawdry star]

Oh

ermm

[lavish geode]

W don't have mutuals

I'll just wait

[tawdry star]

[olive wadi]

fucks your problem??

i have dated multiple times before but sure , be a dick ig

[woven lark]

oh kay..👀

[kindred stone]

dont take him seriously

prince is like that to new peeps

[olive wadi]

alright if u say so

[real junco]

Bruh lmao

[lavish geode]

Shrigma male

[merry yarrow]

I am currently failing at AS phy in school

3 tests

all 3 of them I score bad in

HOW TF SHOULD I IMPORVE

I CANT EVEN ANSWER WORKSHEET QUESTIONS PROPERLY

https://tenor.com/view/aaaa-gif-19882346

[real junco]

When did you start

[finite flower]

on which topics?

[real junco]

because AS physics is horrible in the beginning

[finite flower]

practise

just keep doing questions

if u cant do first try then thats fine

look at the ms/solution

and understand how its solved

[real junco]

I dont think it's possible to do it on the first try lol

poor kids are used to IGCSE

[finite flower]

well yea depends on the person

[lavish geode]

U need to get used to their style of questions

And memorize like 10% from the ms

The stupid 1 2 mark questions

[olive wadi]

i never took physics in A levels but transition from IGCSE ---> A level sucks

teachers should guide u much better , its always a brick wall when u start a levels

[stark marsh]

adn the good ones leave cuz covid

it's a headache i can barely answer physics question or chemistry

why here?

[real junco]

@tawdry star

[stark marsh]

i didnt put 2fa im a genius

lemme go enable it

[merry yarrow]

Jun 21st I think

[tawdry star]

Thnx

[merry yarrow]

1st one was on units which I did decent, the 2nd one was on Uncertainty worse than the 1st one and the 3rd one was on Elasticity which was bad

[finite flower]

oof

[real junco]

Waves and electricity are waiting

[merry yarrow]

we started with electricity yesterday 💀

[woeful ferry]

If u love any of the sciences u cringe

[kindred stone]

i like em

[lament cloud]

I like math and physics

And a little bit of chemistry

[lavish geode]

i like u 😳

[kindred stone]

[olive wadi]

i like watching videos of ppl do cool stuff with science like Mark Rober does

but otherwise i dislike studying it very much

[real junco]

Damn you shouldn't have said that

[river solstice]

who here is receiving their results on tuesday?

[flint geyser]

i am, but this is #venting

[lavish geode]

He's building up for a vent

[river solstice]

haha yeah😆 . It's she btw. Just wanted to see if you guys are as stressed as I am

[olive wadi]

honestly i know im probably going to retake anyway i have been preparing it for since the day i gave the exam but still stressed ngl

bio & chem will be fine but i kinda chocked hard on math exams and messed em up , sooo its gonna be brutal for math grade on tuesday :/

[kindred stone]

y'all please don't spam with useless gifs

it's been deleted

next time it's a warning or depending on the gif worse

[flint geyser]

absolutely, i'm really hoping i don't drop to a b in phy

[river solstice]

same man

i'm stressing about maths too I somehow messed up p1 and p4. Two papers that are the most scoring😫

[river solstice]

I died in maths

too

[olive wadi]

yeah rip to us both

im just not gonna check math grade

and continue preparing for retake

[mild compass]

for a levels?

[river solstice]

yup

[spark sonnet]

damn i havent been on this channel in a hot sec

some tone deaf ass bitch is pissing me off

[mild compass]

o

[spark sonnet]

thank you for coming to my ted talk

[hybrid kiln]

fax

oops sorry for the ping

[mild compass]

banned

[olive wadi]

No problemo

[delicate bramble]

saw that, too late:)

im FBI

[tawdry star]

#semi-colon

[delicate bramble]

ok sir

[spark sonnet]

nazi mod moment

[flint geyser]

y'all know the painting i sent in #original-content ..... spent 4 hours on that and my sister just "accidentally" spilt paint water on it today. the whole thing is literally ruined

it's a minor thing but i am having a meltdown 😭😭

[merry yarrow]

F

[spark sonnet]

bruh thats so shit what the fuck

they look amazing, i am so sorry omfg.

have u considered sealing your works?

[flint geyser]

thanks <33 ill try to salvage what i can once it's dry but i dunno

[flint geyser]

i was planning to once i was done - i was still working on them

[spark sonnet]

ahhhhhhhh fuck

what paint is it baby?

water?

or acrylic?

[flint geyser]

acrylic

[spark sonnet]

oof

well

you can dab with kitchen towel and work your way around it

water doesnt ruin acrylic afaik

it just dilutes it

so the good news is that youll be fine, just more effort

[flint geyser]

the actual paint is fine but it was gross paintwater so the canvas is just stained

i can paint over it but it shows through

ill do what i can, I'm just really sad it got messed up after so much work

[kindred stone]

well

make the mess into art

that's what i used to do till i stopped art

gl making it better ig

[spark sonnet]

ohhh my god that sucks so much

paper towel the living shit out of it

[flint geyser]

thanks <3

[flint geyser]

i did and its kinda better?? ive done some black over it and its a bit of a wreck but like what can i do yknow

[spark sonnet]

yayyy thats something, im glad to hear. sorry again </3

[flint geyser]

all good, thank you for the kindness <33

[spark sonnet]

kiss

[olive wadi]

What do you do when someone you love (even tho they are online) has almost none of your trust , so even the little-est most petty stuff can trigger a huge pile of stress or even anger in you? I just went thru such a big panic attack from the stress i got from a small thing they did , like when my other friends do small inconvienient or maybe even annoying? disrespectful? stuff i never have a problem and i always get along with most ppl , but this said individual that i value so much also stresses me out so much and im starting to believe its bec of lack of trust , and im honestly clueless on how to fix that rn im thinking of just taking a break from them even if it makes me sad in the long term its still better than panic attacks and stress

[spark sonnet]

thats a big red flag if im going to be honest with you

i dont know a lot of context, but this is very emotionally unhealthy

[olive wadi]

even tho i rlly hate to admit that

i myself have admitted it lately

[spark sonnet]

thats admirable, its hard to admit tbh

do u mind telling me why theres such a severe lack of trust?

[olive wadi]

i tolerated them for over a year thru all their shit but they made me go thru so much meanwihle , now i see that i lack any trust

well

[spark sonnet]

ohhhhhh so they fucked you over

[olive wadi]

before they used to lie a lot and keep many secrets and do things that rlly piss me off

we argued over same things million times its still unchanged

[spark sonnet]

leave their ass

[olive wadi]

im so scared of cutting ties with them but im getting to a point where im actually considering just taking a break and potentially be free

i exaggerated our good moments too much

[spark sonnet]

leave their ass!

[olive wadi]

probably

[spark sonnet]

please. take it from someone who was in ur situation almost 2 years ago

the trauma i got from it is still healing

theyre not worth ur time

[olive wadi]

[spark sonnet]

^^ this is the biggest deal breaker IMO

[olive wadi]

many ppl have disappointed me before , but i rlly thought i could fix this person and finally have a healthy friendship but no

yeah

i turned a blind eye to many red flags and stuck to good things

[spark sonnet]

that alone tells me its not good

i dont know u personally nafany, but you are not obligated to fix anyone

u deserve someone who does not require constant maintenance

[olive wadi]

i cant help it i saw them going thru something i once went thru so i felt like helping out

but yeah ur 100% right

its been what 1.5 year now? yea therese improvement from both me and them

but honestly i dont have much faith in it anymore

it just gives me stress

like 90% of the time its stress and time wasting , 10% of the time its nice and plesasant

which isnt fair

[spark sonnet]

i want to hug you so bad rn :/

was in the same place

please leave

before it hurts more

you dont deserve to suffer like that

[olive wadi]

i just fear being alone you know

[spark sonnet]

u can have a few extra bolts at hand and a few tools, but carrying the weight of an entire toolshed would break ur back

[olive wadi]

cus i have always been so nice to everyone but i always get abandoned

or i have to cut them off

i dont like doing that , ik its part of life but i dont get why i cant find someone permanent

But ur right i need to do it

[spark sonnet]

i get what you mean

you have a long life ahead of you

lifelong people await you

[spark sonnet]

best of luck, update me if u want <3

[olive wadi]

ur right

thank you tho , telling me to my face what i alrdy konw just didnt wanna damit

admit*

i'll update u

<3

[spark sonnet]

you're welcome it's the least i could do

stay strong and know you deserve good things

[olive wadi]

[eager ore]

How do I become confident but not cocky? I struggle with anxiety and doubt everything I do, I lose confidence in my self and I think that’s affecting me academically, how do I gain confidence but not become overconfident?

[kindred stone]

for me I decided not to compare to others and say how much better i can do (with average marks), like my parents tell me to, even if yu know something learn it again and again till you've mastered it.

I decided to cut social ties for a while so i can have a peace of mind and dont get any expectations from others

[eager ore]

Well my situation, I only have 4 classmates which is a whole another story but I do strive to do better. After studying, i think about the session and it keeps me up at night and start panicking when I don’t remember the definition of something. When I say studying rn I’m just making notes and next week I’m going to start hardcore studying

Ik it seems like I just answered my own problem

[kindred stone]

heh

[hybrid kiln]

same bro i cant even talk during my online classes

[eager ore]

I feel you, may times I’ve not asked a question cause it’s too dumb but now idc, I’ll ask it, whatever they think doesn’t matter

[hybrid kiln]

and now my business teacher thinks im dumb

[eager ore]

Let him, show him in exams/tests ur not

[hybrid kiln]

same same thats what i told myself last week

im preparing for AS rn

[eager ore]

October?

[hybrid kiln]

nah i just started

[eager ore]

Oh ok

From someone who was real casual: take it seriously, study after class and have ur free time. Find this balance and you’ll be good for your exams and for A2

[hybrid kiln]

ill try but i cant stop procrastinating

[eager ore]

Yea ik, I was the same but after a month I can stop doing any task and study

You need to forget that habit

It takes time

[hybrid kiln]

yeah true ill try my best thanks:)

[eager ore]

Np, good luck

[hybrid kiln]

u too

[kindred stone]

do this plz

i bunked a monthof phy

regrets

[south dome]

I hate vectors

[dull pulsar]

i want to study and simultaneously don't want to study

I have a test in 2 days on a whole chapter that I haven't started yet. It's an easy chap and I doubt I'll have issues navigating it

But I'm frustrated that im not acting on my emotions of wanting to study and letting myself down every single day and I wish to be ali abdaal

i refuse to believe there are people who don't have a procrastinating issue and also want to believe that there are, so I can be one aaaaaaaaa

[eager ore]

everyone procrastinates, some more than others but its something you can work on, I used to procrastinate really bad, would sit at my desk and spend hours saying ill start after the next video. I thought I had ADHD at one point cause i was getting distracted so easily. Its been 2 months and i can get 70% of my work done, so its progress but not instant, it will take time

[eager ore]

if you think you understand the concepts then do some papers to solidify that

If you struggle youll have the urgency to revise, if you dont you will gain confidence

[inner plinth]

Okay so I genuinely in need of advice, I need to retake 2 exams, because the school isn't convinced that I should get higher in my Maths and Physics exam, and I will be starting my AS level year soon, and I am seriously having some troubles managing my time, and it will be worse later, any tips?

I am going to take 3 AS levels

My mind is weird, I am trying to have my education elsewhere, but I cannot fully risk it, so I am both meeting Egypt and international countris if that makes sense

Hence I am taking 3

plus my school doesnt allow me to pick only 2

they say I must take 3 for some reasons

My friend who was 100% planning to go to Egypt did that, and they still ended up saying no

No idea man, my school...sucks in various ways

yea

Yea ik

I am working on it, I have one country in mind and thats it tbh

If I didnt succeed, going to egypt

I have enough to put me in some colleges yes

I have discussed it with my parents too, they seem to approve

Maths Biology Chemistry

Physics and Maths

Yea :')

Oct/nov?? or may june??

alright then

May june

If I study from now then ig I guess ill be able to handle, but i need to revise really well this time

That's all I can guarantee

Yea but wont the syllabus change tho?

I get what you mean tbh, but there will be changes in the syllabus no?

well either way, ill see what I can do, thank you so much

[mild compass]

you're welcome

np

[real junco]

[eager ore]

Fuck these university websites

I fucking can’t do this anymore

Why is there a shit ton of information and none at the same time?? They tell u about all these requirements, u click the link to academic requirements and there’s 5 different things but none to tell u what grades u need

Sorry I had to get this out there lol

[river wadi]

Rather than checking the university websites, check external sources that usually give more details about a uni than the uni website itself (sad, but true) or try calling the admissions office. They can usually provide you with all information about requirements.

[river wadi]

haha understandable

[eager ore]

alright im going to try that. thank you

[mild compass]

Just be careful cause external third party sources can have outdated information

[sleek bay]

The relationship between me and my family is at an all-time low recently... I don't feel like I was a part of my family anymore, and every day, I would just hope for a chance for me to go outside to be free from this prison, even just for a short moment. However, with the pandemic going wrong in my country, the chance for me to spend time outside the house is incredibly slim. Thus, I have to stay at home, with my parents, and with that comes a lot more conflicts, which lead to an even worse relationship between me and the rest of the family... Sometimes I seriously thought that I wasn't born in this family, and I was here just to be my family's punching bag; I was in this family just to be made fun of by other family members. I know I am a weirdo, but even outside I wasn't treated this harsh like how I am being treated by my own parents. I tried to talk to them, but usually it ends up in my parents lecturing me until 2am. I am not confident to do anything with my family anymore. I stay in my own room, do my own thing, and even then I don't have any privacy. Closing the door to my room doesn't work, since my parents will open it without my permission anyway. Sorry if I am rambling randomly about stuffs, but I need to vent my emotions out since keeping it in just brings more misery in my brain and it doesn't allow me to think straight anymore.

[ionic copper]

i hate maths bro why did i even pick this subject. the teacher sucks. theres too many assignments. its 11am i havent slept since yesterday i wanna sleep so bad i've been crying over a textbook question. a textbook question. why did i even take maths . i wanna resdsaksdf does talking adderall works

[flint geyser]

maths sucks and adderall is a bad idea unless you have adhd AND a prescription

i would suggest taking a short nap [<30 mins] so you wake up a little better but not groggy

and if you're struggling with a question then maybe if you ask in one of the maths channels then someone might be able to help you!!

good luck and i hope you get some rest <3

[ionic copper]

i have low latent inhibiton which basically inhibits the brains ability to separate useful stimuli it receives from the stuff i dont have to process. so its like the opposite of tunnel vision bcs i cant tune out informations that are irrelevant and sometimes it gets super overwhelming because when im studying i literally can't concentrate to one thing at a time bcs im fixated by anything else but the topic

[ionic copper]

thx for the advices :)) rlly do appreciate it

[flint geyser]

that sucks and sounds similar to adhd in some ways :( i dunno if adderall would help with it but i hope you're able to get stuff done

[ionic copper]

my mate offered me addys. is it safe to give it a try only for a low dose and see how it goes?

[kindred stone]

dk

[tawdry star]

Take drugs only based off a doctor's prescription

[kindred stone]

doktor pugs

[flint geyser]

honestly, i don't know, but what i know addereall does is increase dopamine, so it might not have the effect you're looking for. it's definitely a way better idea to not take things you haven't been prescribed

i also know it can have addictive tendencies and people end up abusing it a lot so i would 100% recommend not taking them in any dose

[ionic copper]

if it increase dopamine that would be a good bonus bcs im sad

[flint geyser]

um, no

that's not how it works

[kindred stone]

no.

bro once you're addicted

imagine the withdrawl

plus it's temporary

better dopamine stuff are like chocolate

[ionic copper]

makes u fat

craving isn't good either

[kindred stone]

drugs over chocolate cuz it makes you fat isnt a great explanation imo

[ionic copper]

drugs made u decrease appetite = skinny. chocolate makes u fat

[flint geyser]

dark chocolate actually has weight loss properties and also please don't advocate for drug abuse 👍

[kindred stone]

mya took my words but yeah

[tribal sparrow]

We don't advocate for drug use here, especially without a doctor's prescription. In other words, it's illegal. Please refrain from discussing it in this manner.

[ionic copper]

im in a desperate state that i'd take anything so that i can concentrate and don't have to stress repeating on reading each materials every hour

[flint geyser]

herbal teas are known to improve concentration, as is vanilla

[tribal sparrow]

Regardless of how desperate you are, it's illegal to take adderall without a prescription. Not to mention the potential adverse effects on your health.

[finite flower]

taking various drugs without prescription will only make you more stressed than before

[flint geyser]

if you'll really take anything, then take things that will actually help you, not illegal substances that might have who knows what effect on your body

if you want actual suggestions i can totally find you some warm tea recipes or other ideas to help you concentrate

[ionic copper]

yes please

[tribal sparrow]

I personally recommend chrysanthemum tea. It has calming effects and has helped me with concentrating for quite a bit during these past few weeks

[flint geyser]

teas that might help:

• chamomile
• jasmine
• oolong
• green tea [you can add honey / lemon too]
• vanilla
• not a tea but honey, lemon, and cinnamon in warm water or milk

general things [incenses, candles, etc] that can help:

• lavender
• cinnamon
• jasmine
• vanilla
• hibiscus

dark chocolate, believe it or not, does have healthy properties if

• you don't eat the stuff that's all preservatives and no chocolate
• you eat a limited amount a day [half a bar or so]

and lastly, there are a lot of study techniques you can try that can help you focus / concentrate [- an unmedicated adhd person]

• the pomodoro timer method is really helpful for me. you can get apps for it [pomo, flora, forest] but essentially the premise is studying for a set period of time [usually anywhere between 15 mins - 1 hour] and then taking a break [5 - 20 mins, just find what suits you best]
• setting up incentives or rewards for completing something, e.g. eating a cookie if you finish a chapter of notes or something
• having music or white noise on. i personally can't study in silence and white noise annoys the shit out of me and i study with pretty loud music lol, but my sister likes having ocean noises and stuff so see what works for you
• sleeping. enough. if you are sleepy or tired your brain will cooperate even less making you frustrated and you get nothing done. if you are winding down just go to bed, pushing yourself will not help

[kindred stone]

👍

[flint geyser]

i hope some of it helps you, please stay safe and don't do anything dangerous

[ionic copper]

thanks im noting them down in my grocery list and im trying to avoid some teas that contains excessive caffeine bcs i've probably had too much already

[eager ore]

trust, dont do anything without prescription. Adderal will increase your heart rate and if you have any underlying heart problems, youll make it worse

It feels like all your problems are solved but once you look at it long term... You start using recreationally, the addiction gets really bad and it takes a toll on your health, mentally as well

[ionic copper]

it rlly depends on self control and how easily you can become addicted

[flint geyser]

no actually ❤️ drugs with addictive tendencies dont care about your self control. once again please stop advocating drug abuse

i can guarantee they will be worse than excessive caffeine

[ionic copper]

i dont advocate drug abuse

[ionic copper]

6 tables of ibuprofen knocked me to sleep for 2 days

[eager ore]

6 tablets???

Isn’t ibuprofen an anti-inflammatory?

But still 6 Tablets? Even in a day that a lot.

[flint geyser]

you shouldn't be taking 6 ibuprofen in a day. that's not good for you, and you should generally be taking then once every 6-8 hours. i don't believe there are 36 hours in a day.

[kindred stone]

you take them at intervals sire

[ionic copper]

yes mb typo

[ionic copper]

was having really bad cramps. it was irresponsible ik

[kindred stone]

1 was enough bro

[olive wadi]

Not rlly a vent but , how do y'all fill yourselves with positive energy? I have noticed that bec of all this social media activism and toxic posts , i have become way more aggressive and less patient/understanding myself and i hate that bec it was one of my biggest qualities how patient and understanding i once was , so im trying to find ways to get away from this toxic media and fill in with positive vibes , any suggestions?

[mild compass]

Meditate

[olive wadi]

its lowkey boring tho

[mild compass]

[north karma]

I dont

Im a walking uramichi san

[olive wadi]

[finite flower]

take a break from social media maybe?

and do more outdoor activities

[mild compass]

social media toxic

[olive wadi]

i live in a very dull gray city with nothing much to do , yes there is some greeny but its far and limited so outdoors is kinda outta the question , most i have is the local park which is small

[flint geyser]

honestly just do the things that make you happy. it's okay to take time figure out what those are and it can feel like a chore at first but like i got back into my passion for the piano these past few months and it really does make me happy. when you're stressed or something just take a break from whatever it is and go do the thingsyou like. who's gonna stop you? it's not worth your mental health in the long term to keep putting yourself in stressful situations

[olive wadi]

Honestly you are very right , and i have been working towards this goal lately , throwing out toxic friendships , making more time to do things i enjoy , even tho i havent figured out most of it and honestly im just looking for new alternatives , i spend way too much time on screen cus i like playing video games but at same time most if not all my studying is online rn so basically whole day im infront of the screen minus the 1hr i go for a run at the park , i feel like i just need more physical hobbies (like drawing etc)

but ya in general im happier and less stressed ever since i started to do these

[flint geyser]

exactly

it's a long term process

so it wont happen immediately

but youll see the progress and itll help

and dont be afraid to try out new things. i learnt to paint this month and like. i never thought i was an artist but it turned out good and i had fun! so it was worth it

[olive wadi]

so true , u see my newfound inpatience is also hitting on this , i should be more patient and wait to see the results over time

yeah for sure! i'll give it a shot tbh , its been a while since i actually sat and painted

Thank uu for opening my eyes

[flint geyser]

ofc!!

[eager ore]

Life is just not fair

If you don’t have money, it’s so disadvantaged

Why are universities so fkn expensive

[flint geyser]

yeah :(

fuck capitalism

[mild compass]

is it capitalism tho

[flint geyser]

i mean

why do you think theyre charging so much

[mild compass]

hmmmmm

i will be completely honest, im not too educated enough on the topic, but ig capitalism is not the only reason for high tuition

inflation could be another reason

[flint geyser]

possibly

[mild compass]

also the reason why international have to pay more than domestic is not capitalism

[flint geyser]

ya thats just bc they rely on us for funding lmao

[mild compass]

lol

Partly yeah lol

[mild compass]

Man physics is too hard 😭

[olive wadi]

me neither but imo education system is flawed from top to bottom , how we are thought , what sort of things we need to go thru , and how uni's and private schools work , putting such high prices on education just means the rich will always be rich cus they get education , the poor stays poor bec bad or no education

fuck this education system tbh

[flint geyser]

yea

[mild compass]

Yea

[tidal birch]

yeah one of my ex had very negligient parents and which led her to become an addict and shit. yeah so what happened her dad left her at birth and her mom more or less doesnt give a damn abt her too so i tried to help as much as i could but stuff happened thats a whole different story what she did

i know what you feel man, i hope youre taking care of yourself

[flint geyser]

im three months clean today and instead of feeling good i just feel worse?? lmao mental health is a scam 💔

[eager ore]

Can I ask what you were taking?

And congratulations for 3months

[flint geyser]

wasn't taking anything, clean from ||self harm|| and thank you :) just doesnt feel as good as i wish it did

[eager ore]

Oh mb, I think of substance when someone says they’re clean. I can’t be the best of help with self harm but dms always open if you want to tell someone what’s going on. There must be something that was causing it so , my advice which you don’t have to take is that problem is still lingering.

And yea mental health is a fucking scam

[flint geyser]

all good, tysm, im just generally like Suffering and have depression so yeah, appreciate it dude

[eager ore]

Nafany said there’s a root to your depression, something triggered it and as scary as it sound, you need to tackle it

[flint geyser]

that's not always true

like there are a couple of things for me but that isnt necessarily true, it just means your brain functions differently and your body doesnt produce enough serotonin

but yeah i cant really do a lot about it

[eager ore]

Yea I’m obv not very good at this but have you tried going to a qualified person?

[flint geyser]

ur good lol and i cant bc my parents think mental illness is fake

also i dont have money

but i get by im safe and stuff and im not doing anything dangerous so ill be fine

im just frustrated its so difficult

i know it is and will be but yknow. sucks

[eager ore]

Oh no, that fkn sucks.

[flint geyser]

yep

but its fine im still here so!

[eager ore]

I was in desperate need of one. Went online and there were paywalls everywhere. I’m sure there are those who are qualified and don’t charge but really hard to find. The world sucks, circles around money

[eager ore]

And you will be here for a long ass time

[flint geyser]

we'll see about that. hopin for the best

[eager ore]

Money has so much power, it’s shit. I’ve seen it turn friends since day 1, into enemies. Like how can u fuck a day 1 friend for money

And the worst part they are still enjoying their lives while we suffer

[flint geyser]

yeah theres some real money hungry garbage in the world rn

[eager ore]

I think where’s the karma, this where I question religion but I don’t want to offend anyone

[flint geyser]

i dont get money of my own so 🤷

if i ever earn enough ill go see a therapist until then ill just listen to angry music and vent abt it lol

[eager ore]

Try boxing lol?

Like I used to punch a wall to get some anger away (I’m weak so it didn’t hurt)

[flint geyser]

im built like a tree i would straight up pass out

issok i vent by playing the piano and stuff so its fine

[eager ore]

Ah we have different meaning of vent 😂

[flint geyser]

its actually a really good way to express emotion if anyone plays an instrument i definitely recommend learning some angry and depressing shit on there

[eager ore]

I used to learn the trumpet back when life was good. I don’t really have the resources for jt

[flint geyser]

oh fair

my go-to solution is just going to sleep tbh which i might do now bc being clean does not feel good

[mild compass]

He do be venting doe

[lean schooner]

I saw yellow vent in Cafeteria

[eager ore]

I’ve noticed hair fall more than usual, been stressed as well. Will this affect me permanently lol

[olive wadi]

idk much about hair fall but generally if u notice its falling more than usual , its probably bec of increase in your stress , thats what happened to me

i dont think u should worry about balding until like 30's i'd say but im no expert this is just based off what i seen

You could get a quick check up at a doctor too , but im reckon its stress since you mentioned it

[mild compass]

dude same lol i've noticed hair fall too i'm like fuck fuck fuck I can't go bald in my twenties

[cosmic ginkgo]

My hair has been all over the house for two years now and I'm still not bald so...there's hope?

[kindred stone]

i pull my hair out when im stressed...

[eager ore]

yea i be thinking the same thing

[north karma]

I play with my hair too lmao

[real junco]

same

[viscid gull]

Actually surprised that Im not bald after suffering from hair fall for couple of years...

[olive wadi]

im gonna be bald tryna enter a goddamn uni thats for sure

[flint geyser]

im already balding

[lean schooner]

lo

[mild compass]

[mild compass]

i wanted to eat ice

but there's none.

[forest pivot]

Open the freezer, take out the ice tray, fill it with water, place it back, go into the future an hour, BOOM!

[mild compass]

WHAT A GENIUS

i will do that

thank u sadashi

[forest pivot]

Anytime

[ionic copper]

omg tysm for the advice to use pomodoro timer method, it rlly helps alot and actually did wonders for me

[kindred stone]

pomodoro works wonders

i use another way where 45-60 mins of studying

and 1 anime episode

which is 20 mins

[flint geyser]

im glad

[eager ore]

I tried it but I get distracted in the 5 min breaks

[flint geyser]

well everything takes practice so don't feel discouraged that you tend to mess up a couple of time

[eager ore]

Yea I basically gave up, I’ll try it again today

[ionic copper]

what did u do during those breaks

[eager ore]

Listen to music or a quick check in social media

Lmao Ik how that gets me distracted but what do you usually do in a break?

[ionic copper]

usually drink water, do a bit stretch, check social media and forex

but i use pomodoro app, so it blocks the entire screen when it reminds u the break is over so i just left my phone from there

i avoid tiktok bcs one time i came across a video of a guy collecting magma to get a prediction of when errupton is going to occur in kilauea, then i learned about volcanos instead

[eager ore]

Tik tok is so addicting, I understand that loool

[eager ore]

I’ll download that app forsure

Which one specifically?

[ionic copper]

productivity (minimalist pomodoro timer)

[eager ore]

Alright thanks

[mild compass]

ok so like i got to my university dorm like 3 days ago, and i'm already feeling "imposter syndrome" lmao. like we have in-person orientation activities all day but whenever i try to take to someone its just like a very shallow conversation

how do I engage in more "in-depth" convos lmao its really getting to me

like its just small talk "where are you from, what major are you in" and all that but it seems like no one is interested in talking to anyone

also i dont drink so when like the beers come out i feel sorta left out lol cause everyone starts chugging down shots

anyone have any advice?

[haughty ibex]

You’re not going thru it alone I’m sure that many others e also experiencing the same thing that u r

U cnt expect urself to get used to such a big change in just a week, it’s gonna take time

You’ll find people like you soon you’ll find friends and right now the small talk is just a way of trying to find people who r like u or who u would like to be friends with

[olive wadi]

honestly i havent been to uni yet but if theres anything i know about trying to fit in to groups/communities is that i just look for something in common i have with them to talk about or an activity to do together , this ranges from animes or shows to sports like playing football or volleyball together etc. imo its an easy way to just find out what they are into and open a convo about it , video games are probably a very easy way for this tbh

as for drinking , i used to bring my own drink or order my own drink like no-alcohol beers malt drinks whenever they drank alcohol, just anything cus otherwise you feel left out yeah , if u wanna be part of the group you gotta join in the group acitvities or find another group that fits u even more

thats from my experience

[mild compass]

Okay thanks guys

I shall try that

[flint geyser]

seeing friends tomorrow and ive literally been overthinking what to wear for 3 days

like i literally dk why im stressing it so much i normally just wear jeans and a tshirt but it doesnt feel like enough

and my parents have been bodyshaming me for the past week which hasnt helped

and i cant figure out how gendered i want to present

idk man 😭 this shouldnt be this stressful

[north karma]

Jus dress what ever u feelin on the day

Iirc ur friends are leaving so thatd be the least of ur worries

[kindred stone]

just be casual

[north karma]

Jus enjoy urself mya

Or else ill smooch u

[kindred stone]

damn

hayzy smooth

[north karma]

😏

[flint geyser]

yeah ur right they are so this is probably a minor thing but it feels unnecessarily stressful

[flint geyser]

damn maybe i wont enjoy myself then :/

[north karma]

I honestly dont mind what u do

Cuz id rather smooch

[flint geyser]

JGKJGLDK

[olive wadi]

i just pick and wear whatever i feel confident and good in , i do care a lot abt my fashion sense cus it sucks and im kinda insecure so i just go with whatever i feel comfortable and confident in

[flint geyser]

yeah i am very insecure abt how i look and im struggling to find something im happy wearing :// i think ill just go with something comfortable and hope its okay

[olive wadi]

Look im on the same boat , im a guy who prefers going to lonely beaches so that ppl cant see my body :/ thats how insecure i can be sometimes same for this , wear something u like and feel comfortable in and it will work

thats what i do and what works for me at least

[flint geyser]

thats probably the best idea

ty guys :)

[olive wadi]

[flint geyser]

[tawdry star]

Just have whatever drink you want to have, it doesn't matter tbh

If people care so much that they want you to drink in order for you to be a part of the convo, ask them to fuckoff

[tawdry star]

See it takes time. So try to do stuff together first like sth solitary, then you'll find peeps

It takes a lotta time sometimes, like I didn't have any friends for a year

So yeah be patient, it's worth it

[kindred stone]

only thing i care mostly about is not wearing the same t shirt twice

[mild compass]

Kk thx pugs

[flint geyser]

just wanted to say ty to everyone here for the earlier advice :) it really did help today

[flint geyser]

idk if yall know the history of jallianwala bagh but its been '''renovated''' and i am genuinely so disgusted

[mild compass]

aaa yeah :(

[mild compass]

What's that

[flint geyser]

it's a bit triggering so i'll censor it for ||massacre, violence, and genocide||

jallianwala bagh is an area outside of on of the most famous temples in india, in amritsar [punjab]. in 1919 under british rule about a thousand people ||were massacred during baisakhi [a celebration] pretty much because the brits felt like it. apparently there was a military order against congregations of more than 4 people but that order only reached amritsar 3 days later. the general decided the best way to solve the problem was by locking all gates to the bagh [square] and firing at the people||

it's a memorial area now - the well especially because ||hundreds of people jumped in there and died just to avoid being shot|| - and the government has now decided to renovate it and make it more appealing, basically erasing its origins and history

[pastel lark]

Oh my god that is ******* awful - I've heard about the massacre before but a very whitewashed colonial version of it

It is rubbish that occupiers try to cover up their tracks hundreds of years later

What's that saying? "The old will die and the young will forget..."

Good on you for being disgusted

[flint geyser]

literally!!! this singular event always makes me feel sick because my great great grandfather was there and my generations of my family are from amritsar

and this isn't even the british, this is our own government

what hurts to see the most is that this is whatthe british wanted

immediately after they tried covering up, destroying the place, building a market over it, but the people rebelled and raised thousands of $$ to buy the place and then preserve it as it was

bullet holes, the well, the locked doors, all of it

and now the government has gotten rid of all of that

GOD

[mild compass]

That's so fucking horrible

[flint geyser]

yep 😐

[ivory nest]

sometimes, i dont feel Indian enough for India. i lived in the USA for a significant portion of my life and it really influenced who i am today because i grew up there. i moved to India in middle school.
i feel like im not good enough for my friends who have spent their entire lives in India because i can't speak Hindi, i'm not a citizen of India, i have an extremely low spice tolerance.. you get it. i don't see other people like me (people who moved to India from the USA) as "outsiders", but i see myself as an outsider. i hate this feeling so much

[mild compass]

i felt the same way, i moved to india from the states in 9th grade so i get you completely

you def arent alone

[flint geyser]

im indian but i only lived there the first three years of my life so i get you!! my hindi reading / writing sucks and my spice tolerance is mediocre at best. i would just suggest immersing yourself in your own culture if it makes you happy - participate in festivals, try integrate your culture at home if you can and want. the indian community is huge and there's a place for every indian so you will always belong

that's totally normal to feel every time i go visit it's weird bc i'm not like them but no two people are really ever like each other are they

[ivory nest]

that's true :')

[ivory nest]

hmm that's a good idea

i already speak in Marathi at home (unless I don't know how to say a sentence in Marathi, in which case ill speak in English, then ask my parents how to say that sentence in Marathi) so i hope im heading in the right direction :')

[eager ore]

I understand that. I moved to India in the 9th grade and for the first year or two I was pretty lonely, we were a small class so I was stuck with my classmates and they’d always talk in Hindi. Over time I understood Hindi(I knew Gujarati so it was a bit similar) and they talked in English a lot more and I “fit in”. But I would always get made fun of for my accent and pronouncing names,

But don’t think that ur not good enough

Even if you’re not born in India; u have Indian origins. My friends were surprised to how many Indian stereotypes I have lol

This also being someone from “africa” so basically I was raised in the wilderness

[mild compass]

yoooo i speak marathi too

[merry yarrow]

I understand Marathi

[ivory nest]

omg same people would (and still) make fun of my accent and stuff i’m sorry you had to go through that :(

[flint geyser]

people made fun of my accent a lot :(( so much so that i actually have an american accent now, but that wasn't my fault, it was other people's

took a while to realise that but i hope you do

[livid token]

hi

[zealous walrus]

hi

[livid token]

who r u

[real junco]

#chat-lounge

[cerulean trellis]

hi

just wana vent here lol

[flint geyser]

go for it that's what this channel i sfor

[cerulean trellis]

ah man. idk i feel like shit since morning its s o exhausting my feelings and emotions are all over the place

sometkmes im doing great and i think hey its finally happening im getting better only to end up crying to sleep the same night ffs its exhausting man. and since i graduated and i havent started uni yet so i have nothing to do its rhe same shit every single day. I tutor a few students and for 3 hours a day my mind is off things and i feel alright but once im done w the tutoring its back to square one

same thing every single day.

same thing in my room everyday. but i dont wana go out too i can go out but i dont want to? im always trying to make stupid excuses trying to avoid going out

[flint geyser]

please remember we're still in the middle of international disaster so there's nothing wrong with not having your shit together all the time

yk what. even if we weren't. no one has it together all the time

getting better isn't a straight line. it isn't even a progress curve. it's a 3 year old scribbling on the walls and floor. crying, relapsing, w/e it is doesn't mean you aren't getting better. if you recognise those are setbacks that's already a step forward

if you don't wanna go out, don't go out. don't feel pressured to go out. and if you want to, but can't, then it's a matter of making yourself do it. it'll always suck until you get up and do it [like not wanting to get into the shower until you're in there] but give yourself incentive, tell yourself you'll do x nice thing if you go out, reward yourself for taking that step

[cerulean trellis]

this means the world to me. thank you.

[flint geyser]

it's totally okay and normal to be tired or stressed and no one is perfect so don't beat yourself up for not keeping it together all the time

[cerulean trellis]

i appreciate you taking out the time just to reply to me.

[flint geyser]

ofc !! i've been there before and i know sometimes you really just need to hear that you're not the worst for not being perfect

[flint geyser]

anytime <3

[cosmic ginkgo]

^^ don't be too harsh on yourself

[cerulean trellis]

ah thank you so much for hearing me out. I know. we are all in a mess its so sad. I really hope i get better and move on from these sad parts of life :/. Just trying to constantly find things to keep me busy and occupied so i dont think of everything at once and stress out so bad.

[cerulean trellis]

thank you girly i really am trying </3

[flint geyser]

you will! you really will

it'll take time but just have faith

in the world and yourself

[cosmic ginkgo]

💜 one day at a time and we'll all get there

[cerulean trellis]

ahhh idk both of u BUT ILY GUYS SM <333

this aside, mya your avatar is beautiful

that show looked so wholesome

[flint geyser]

HSDHHSD thank you i wish i could've gone

[cerulean trellis]

KBDDKDHSN WE ALL DO SIS

[flint geyser]

JKFJGKJDFKGJ

[spark sonnet]

@cerulean trellis sorry if this is a bit late, i wanted to say that i hope you know its really normal to feel that way (not that its okay, but like mya said, since we're in a pandemic and all). i know the way you feel and i really empathise with you. i really recommend rewatching old films or shows that you liked before (especially during your middle school years) as well as going back to books or music from that period of your life, it has really good grounding effects. try your best to get up every once and a while and break the routine, even if its just sticking ur head out the window for 5 mins and getting some air. ❤️

[wicked turret]

@cerulean trellis I hope u will come back from this. Great days will definitely come, so hang on 👍.

Make sure you

• have an adequate diet
• exercise
• get a proper sleeping

[cerulean trellis]

thank you so much guys this mean the absolute world to me. i really am tryjng to hold it together. this feels really good. thanks guys i cant emphasize how grateful i am for yall to take out time to just text these stuff here.

[flint geyser]

every time i try to sleep i have violent nightmares i just wanna sleep peacefully bruh

as a result i just stay up until i literally can't anymore and it probably isn't very healthy

[eager ore]

As someone who’s finds getting sleep hard, I know the pain. Especially how it affects ur day

[eager ore]

Can I ask if this is trauma?

[flint geyser]

i haven't been through any traumatic events really so no i doubt it

[flint geyser]

it really does

[eager ore]

Damn, if you don’t mind sharing but by violent nightmares wdym

[flint geyser]

well people die a lot

sometimes i die

general violence like ||car crashes, murder, etc||

[eager ore]

Oh, man that must be painful. I’m so sorry you have to go through that

[flint geyser]

it's really frustrating when i just wanna sleep jfjdjs

thank you i appreciate it

i had a really awful one last night and i was just so tired all day today and i wish i knew how to just Sleep yknow

[eager ore]

I hate to resort to this but I’m sure there must be meds to help you sleep. They are prolly also prescription

Like ones that block the dream chemicals.

[flint geyser]

there probably are, but whenever i talk to my parents about anything mental health related they tell me i need to be mentally stronger or just deal with it

[eager ore]

😞. That’s even worse, but I’d advise you to talk to a professional if that’s possible

Even if it’s online

You might be able to find a free genuine service

[flint geyser]

when im abroad for uni that's the plan since i'll be away from parents and hopefully somewhere with better resources like US/UK

holding out until next year and maybe things will work out

[eager ore]

Idk if this will work but can u try lucid dreaming? If you can realise that the nightmare is not real and it’s a dream, you can alter it but most likely you will wake up. But once you get better you can stay lucid for longer

[flint geyser]

ive never tried that but maybe? ill figure out if i can

[north karma]

Its not that easy to lucid dream

[eager ore]

Yea it’s not, a lot of practice and things you need to do

[flint geyser]

yeah i read up on it last night [instead of sleeping, ironically] but yk im willing to try anything at this point

i got an hour of sleep last night and it wasnt even peaceful

im just running on autopilot now so its fine

[eager ore]

I had 4 hours before my English mock, woke up and was contemplating if I should sleep in and then it kicked in that I have a mock and woke up instantly

But I struggle to fall asleep, I’ll stay in my bed for hours

[cerulean trellis]

just be careful :-; it could sometimes be dangerous too

ah im so sorry you have sm trouble sleeping :/

[flint geyser]

it's okay!! you get used to it

[kindred ridge]

I can't do AS level subjects, it's been one and a half month and I still haven't figured anything out, as nothing changed much at all

what's worse is that I'm required by this world to take chemistry for A levels as well if I want o major in engineer well becoz of the side courses in college I must go through

although I never studied chemistry before

my sleep cycle is ruined, my eye hurts so bad at night whenever I study either by doing problems or hw

and this cycle is not gonna stop until I get my AS grades or A level grades

[flint geyser]

why can't you do them? sure they're hard and terrible and they suck but that doesn't mean you can't do them

[flint geyser]

me too :( and it's genuinely the worst but if you need it, you need it, right? so all you can do is try your best, which, by the sounds of it, you are

[flint geyser]

working while you're exhausted doesn't result in productivity nor in better mental health. maybe we can work out a more sustainable study plan for you?

[kindred ridge]

sure ig

[flint geyser]

do yk how much sleep you usually get

[kindred ridge]

7 or 8 I think

mostly 7

[flint geyser]

that's a decent amount if you can keep it up it'll help

what my parents suggested i do [and really helps] is have a 'wind down' time before sleeping

so no screens, just give yourself a break from blue light and studying

half an hour is ideal but even ten minutes is a good starting place

listen to music, make tea or something, just don't study / use a screen / avoid reading before bed so you sleep better

[kindred ridge]

never thought of giving myself a screen break

wait wdym by avoid reading

[flint geyser]

give your eyes a break

if you strain them too much before bed you might have trouble sleeping or feel less well-rested inthe morning

[flint geyser]

sometimes you don't think of really obvious things and that's okay that's why we vent to other people

[kindred ridge]

thanks, it's a miracle this channel existed here

r u an a level student?

[flint geyser]

i'm starting y13 tomorrow yeah

[flint geyser]

we all need to vent sometimes!!

[kindred ridge]

how did you get over AS levels?

[flint geyser]

i dont think i am qualified to answer this at all i do not have healthy coping mechanisms

i guess i just had a strong support system of friends

and my only option was to keep going

[kindred ridge]

ah I see

[flint geyser]

it wont be easy but itll be worth it i promise

youll get through it 🫂

[amber otter]

is feeling homesick in your second year away weird? like I felt absolutely nth in my first year of leaving home but for some reason i feel like an absolute wreck this year

[cosmic ginkgo]

It's not weird if it's what you feel

[flint geyser]

absolutely not

i moved here three years ago and i still get "homesick"

feelings are weird. they just happen

there's nothing wrong with that

[spark sonnet]

its not weird at all

even a different city can give you culture shock

also ive come here to mope about job hunting

i dont want to be stuck in retail

[wise sun]

@kindred ridge i have started an a level youtube channel. We have uploaded videos on chemistry if you need to refer to them to revise

You could look for my message in self promotion

I am going to be honest. I personally think that chemistry for CIE is pretty straight forward and dare I say simpler than some of the other subjects ( I had a strong chemistry foundation so it may vary ). I would recommend you to maybe take a break so

[flint geyser]

this is super subjective bc personally i struggled [and currently struggle] a lot with chem so it might not be that way for everyone

[wise sun]

Some questions will be weird. They will be difficult. You may not understand a chapter now but working in a mentally disturbed state isn't productive and may make studying the subject in the future annoying

[wise sun]

Yea i said it because I have a strong background. That being said I am not saying I am the best. I have weak chapters.

[wise sun]

I missed this. I can't really speak for international O levels or gcses because I did not take their curriculum but If you are spending time learning the 9th and 10th syllabus at the same time maybe you should only read up on the key chapters that are common

Try your best. If it helps I took bio from scratch in As levels and boi was that difficult to memorise everything. I felt behind my classmates but it was reminder of what i did not know.

Knowing what you don't know is a blessing because you know exactly what you must work on. You can slowly work on chemistry and read the gcse text book along side to stay updated. Its okay to take a long time to get a grasp of a topic but don't give up. You got this

[spark sonnet]

im going to be leaving my pet behind for a few months

and im just really upset about it

[flint geyser]

oh :(( im sure they'll be okay and the months will pass before you know it

[mild pasture]

i just don't know how to manage my time. sometimes my teachers don't come during online classes, and i end up waiting in the lobby thinking they're there, and that they'll admit me. but, when the class' time is over i realize i could've been studying for my other subjects. and when i do study during that time, the teachers there. i've tried making a timetable, but its not effective at all. i have absolutely have no sense of time management. i end up taking classes for around 4-5 hrs (whenever im online), then study from noon, then study for isl from 10-2. i wanted to bake cookies today :(( but i don't have time. i just realized how precious time is....
i feel like i'm studying hard not smart in a way?? idk it's like all what i've learnt is going to waste. i'm just studying to keep myself busy

[olive wadi]

in my opinion you lack a plan hence why you think ur wasting ur time , if your teachers are failing to show you the way which they often do if im honest, you take it on ur hands and set up a schedule , about your studies i'd suggest looking at the syllabus and compare with where u are at class and work ur way from there , set yourself small term achieveable goals like for example "today im gonna finish this section of this chapter and solve xyz amount of questions" Etc. I believe that to have good time management you need to;
-have a good peaceful space to work at only meant for studying
-have a plan as to what you need to / want to achieve with that time you are about to spare , aka setting goals
-crafting a good schedule for those goals
This way not only will you use your time well but also get motivated that you achieved your goals , instead of studying without really a goal just to keep urself busy. Remeber , you do have time , you just need to learn how to use it well.

Also maybe you can search on Youtube for some tips/advice on this topic

[flint geyser]

i literally don't even want to go to uni anymore 🗿

my mom was talking to one of my old school friend's moms just now and was telling me about all the stuff my old friends are doing / have done. one of my old best friends published a book, raised $10,000 for kids' education, did a bunch of maths competitions, and a course from stanford... all last year

i think the look on my mom's face was enough to kill me inside tbh

sometimes i look at my grades and essays and shit and think i have a shot at uni but every time i hear about the reality of it i don't even have the heart to apply bc literally. what even is the point. maybe if i'd tried harder last year or something i might have something worthwhile on my application but i'm already fully mentally prepared to get rejected from everywhere

the thing is

i know my parents aren't

and my dad still thinks i'll get into CMU or something and i don't know how to tell him i couldn't even dream of that

idk when getting an education got so stressful but at this point i don't even want one. i don't think i want anything at all

i literally just want to drop out of school and disintegrate in a field or something

[eager ore]

I guess I can kind of relate to how u feel, financially I have no idea where we are at but it’s becoming clear that we have next to nothing. I think to myself what’s there point of all this work if it’s just going to mean I can’t afford to go to university. My anxiety isn’t helping either, im getting 4-5 hours of sleep and I keep imagining what’s going to happen and start panicking. I don’t know but my parents just don’t seem to care, they believe something will happen, a miracle or it will work itself out. It pains me that my mum comes into my room and asks if applications started for Canada. What’s the point to applying to Canada when it’s so fucking expensive to which I get an answer, who knows what happens, what if someone helps us out financially. My options that are left are Europe where it’s still expensive, not as much as NA but it’s still $30k a year or free tuition at TUM but I have to learn German( thought at a beginner level as the course is fully taught in English). Where do I have the time to learn German? I’ve got A2 and AS to focus on and chemistry where i just have no idea what’s going on. I want to restart life. I don’t want to go through this anymore

In my life I’ve always been optimistic and things have never worked out, I’m trying to prepare for the worst and being realistic cause I can’t handle being things not going my way one more time

[flint geyser]

that is truly awful and im so sorry :( you could consider applying for finaid if possible and available. there are a few select places in NA that offer great needblind education so maybe that could work out? i think you're both right, i think you should definitely be realistic and have plans you can afford, but maybe don't lose hope? maybe someone will help you out. ur right in the realism though and i hope you're able to get somewhere you can afford

as for the learning german part there are a lot of resources online - i don't recall any rn apart from duolingo but if you think you'd be able to manage that self study alongside everything else it's worth a shot

[cosmic ginkgo]

I think you can try Finland too? @north karma said it's €1k tuition a year or so

[north karma]

No no it isnt

But tuition has 50%-100% scholarships for certain merits u can view on the websites

And some unis have 50% for paying the tuition fee early

[eager ore]

Hey thanks for reassurance, I think I had a panic attack last night. I’ll check out NA again, all i heard was 50k with the councillors

I’ll have a look at Finland as well

Thanks guys

[eager ore]

Once I’m done with A2, going to prioritise my mental health. If I’m still sane by then lol

[flint geyser]

i have those a bit so if you ever need anything feel free to ping me

[flint geyser]

bruh when will people stop shitting on astrology and calling it white girl sterotypes

fyi vedic astrology was one of the first forms of cosmic study and is pretty fundamental in hinduism and isnt just stereotypes based on star signs 👍 its actually a study of planet movement and the stars

it just pisses me off when people think its that basic and a joke bc that is not even what it is

astronomy and meteorology are parts of it too

[spark sonnet]

i think its the work of the media unfortunately

i personally dont know much about astrology, i just know about the part where there is a group of people who think astrology dictates their entire life

so it looks like the media doesnt portray astrology properly at all

[flint geyser]

definitely doesnt and its realy frustrating

bc its a big part of the reliigon yk and shitting on other peoples religion isnt.

[flint geyser]

often those are the people who dont know shit about it at all 👍

[spark sonnet]

yeah i figured ://

[spark sonnet]

agreed

[flint geyser]

yeah ://

[olive wadi]

So recently i had to remove someone from my life that was a bad / toxic influence even tho i loved them very much and they meant a lot to me , is it normal that i still think about them time to time during the day , like i wanna forget and move on but its just not happening that quickly

[flint geyser]

yes!! very much normal

[spark sonnet]

totally normal

it took me about 7 months to forget about my toxic first love

most of which i spent crying

[flint geyser]

i dropped one of my bestest friends for being racist and insensitive and i still think about him a lot tbh but the thing is, over time, it went from being a painful 'i miss him' to just occasionally wondering how he's doing and if he's a better person now

which also took time but is normal and you might find that happens to you too

[spark sonnet]

^^^

eventually you will reach that stage that mya described and thats simply hoping for the best for them

they wont matter anymore one day

[olive wadi]

Thats the phase im slowly entering/feeling rn , i no longer feel like i miss them or want them back but more like wondering if they are well and if everything is alright , but tbh i believe that i have just become a little inpatient , i have been succeeding a lot recently so i just keep thinking i must get the results i want instantly , they are not a bad person at all just bad for me and i had to end my friendship with them and even tho it hurt me it was the right decision for us both i just want to move on quicker , this is probably one thing i dislike about being emotional and caring so much about ppl , its hard to move on from those who were once a part of ur heart

[olive wadi]

Yeah ur right, i think i just need to give this more time , im being a bit unfair to myself now that u say it

[flint geyser]

that is totally true and i have no advice there lol bc i just dont open up to ppl at all now so as not to get hurt which is probably not healthy so do not do that

im glad you were able to make decisions that were best for u

[olive wadi]

yeah i get you , ofc this isnt my first time moving on from someone but its different from before , before it was much easier bec i had more ppl around me and the ppl i got rid of was bec they lost their value/importance or just straighgt up started to hate them , this person was still important to me but i still had to remove them for the greater good thats why its as hard as it is to move on but tbh its not been long enough too so thats kinda fair , idk i just want to forget about them completely and and fully focus on myself and stuff i have to do

i guess we all have different coping mechanisms

[spark sonnet]

you'll be okay, keep focusing on yourself and hang in there

mingle with new friends

on a side note i really dont like people who victimise themselves and twist a story so that they appear the victim

its so disgusting

[olive wadi]

Yeah i used to be good at that irl but school finished and covid running rampant still , so its hard to find new friends irl , and im bad at making new friends on discord idk how

[spark sonnet]

maybe join servers about stuff you like?

[olive wadi]

Idk where this came from but i never do this , infact i tend to blame most things on myself which is probably why most ppl get an easy time

[spark sonnet]

im not talking abt you

[olive wadi]

i do so many things i dont even know which to go for sometimes

[spark sonnet]

i said on a side note

like its totally unrelated to you lol

[olive wadi]

🙏

[wicked turret]

I'm stressed

[keen kestrel]

What’s wrong?

[wicked turret]

I was invited to become a student council member

[keen kestrel]

Do you wanna join in?

[wicked turret]

it goes both way

it would be a nice credit and a good experience for me

just feel like im not cut out for it

[keen kestrel]

Out of 10, how interested are you

[wicked turret]

mid 8

[real junco]

easy

accept it

[wicked turret]

: )

[keen kestrel]

Hmm

[wicked turret]

accepting is easy yea

[keen kestrel]

If u accept

[wicked turret]

but im just worried

[keen kestrel]

Can u like leave later on

[wicked turret]

I dont think so

[real junco]

dw it's not like a post in the government

[keen kestrel]

If you can leave, then I don’t see an issue in giving it a shot

[real junco]

just do it

[keen kestrel]

^

Nothing to lose tbh

[wicked turret]

okay

i will try

thank you folks 🙏

[keen kestrel]

Anytime

[spark sonnet]

give it a shot dude

im sure youre gonna do great!

you were selected for a reason

and hey who the fuck cares if youre not cut out lol go fuck around and do good things

keep us updated on how it goes~

[wicked turret]

Thank you so much, m8

I am not much of a talker (or typer in this case)

but i truly appreciate your encouragement

[mild compass]

lemme just really quickly say

I FKIN HATE MY INTERNET

I WANTED TO DOWNLOAD VIDEOS MY NEW TEACHER GAVE US FROM 9TH GRADE BC SHE GAVE HER OLD CLASS OTHER STUFF THAT I NEVER EVEN HEARD OF BC MY OLD TEACHER WOULD SKIP THEM AND KEEP THEM FOR LATER

AND AT FIRST THEY DIDNT DOWNLOAD

AND THEN THEY DID BUT THEY WOULD JUST DISAPPEAR

AND THEN WHEN I DOWNLOAD EACH VIDEO ON ITS OWN INSTEAD OF A ONEDRIVE OF THE WHOLE THING

THE VIDEOS WONT OPEN AND IT WOULD SAY ERROR

SO I HAD TO DOWNLOAD EACH ONE DRIVE ON ITS OWN BC IF I TRIED TO DOWNLOAD EVEN 2 TOGETHER IT WOULD DISAPPEAR

AND NOW THE VIDEOS ARENT OPENING ANYMORE

welp

that was nice

[wicked turret]

Has any classmate of urs managed to download it?

[spark sonnet]

no problem :)

[mild compass]

thanks but it works now 😭🥲

[ivory nest]

my friend has pretty much disappeared off of Discord. i'm just so confused. there's pretty much no other way for me to contact them. i messaged them a week ago, they came online for 10 mins, but never responded. they've been offline since :/

[flint geyser]

that's weird :// they could need space or might not be able to / allowed to use discord rn

[ivory nest]

i guess. they prolly aren't allowed to use it rn because of exams. i hope they're doing okay :( i don't know how i can ask them what happened.

[flint geyser]

well, u kinda answered yourself there - maybe they just aren't allowed to use it bc of exams. im sure when they come back you guys can talk about it

[ivory nest]

yep, thanks

[flint geyser]

anytime

i hope theyre okay! im sure they are

[ionic copper]

OMG the teacher is literally so evil for setting us assignments to complete all the chapters from the practice book

and its due on monday

he thinks we're robots or something

bro

this actually sucks

i cant get a proper sleep for the last 2 days

[flint geyser]

do you have no time during the day to work on the assignments?

[eager ore]

I feel you. We got a few days of holidays and I was going to use it to make a lot of progress on AS and A2 but the teacher just assigned us to make a podcast and tons of paper 5s for which we have done nothing for. I’m barely coping with the workload now and they do this… I wasn’t getting work done and explained to them my situation but they don’t care

[eager ore]

But the hard truth is, you have to grind ur way out or if your parents understand then submit it when u can, doesn’t matter if it’s late

[flint geyser]

^^^

dont make late submissions a habit but

sometimes. it happens

like! you will fail at some point in life and that's not pessimism, its just. sometimes things will not work. and thats fine. if you just could not finish this paper yesterday then just submit it today. its just one time. but dont let that 'one time' become two and five and ten times

[gleaming sable]

Bro I’m so frustrated

My parents keep spending a shit ton of money on expensive shit like the most expensive model of a Lexus car or renovating our summer house with the most expensive materials possible

And then when I ask them to buy me a gym membership or I asked them for a new pair of trousers they say we don’t have enough money

Like why the fuck did you buy the most expensive car model if we don’t have money

[lavish swan]

its called priorities my friend

its a tough life

[north karma]

Thats the worst advice ive heard in my life lmfao

[flint geyser]

yeah not to be blunt but thats just

not helpful in the slightest

anyway sushi i am sorry your parents are so selfish and i hope youre able to be financially independent at some point