#About Choices - Rico

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pulsar sage
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limber sentinel
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your name is diego?

pulsar sage
limber sentinel
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why rico

pulsar sage
limber sentinel
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oh okay

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# pulsar sage I wrote this before the tragedy lol

GUESS WHO'S BACK!! RICOOOOO!! man, this poem is desperately honest. it feels like a full confession — not just of love, but of every feeling and emotion the speaker has toward the person he loves. every stanza, every line kind of puts you in his place. you can feel the desperation of someone trying to understand the other person, wanting their love to last, to keep going, but at the same time there’s this uncertainty coming from her side. he clearly doesn’t know what’s going on in her heart, and he knows that’s completely out of his control. that emotional honesty, to me, is one of the poem’s strongest points. it makes it heavy, but not in a bad way — more like something bittersweet.
That “uncertainty” from the person he loves creates a kind of block in him. he doesn’t know how to act — whether to move forward, step back, speak, or stay silent. he wants to love without fear, but this insecurity is there, like a constant battle between what he feels and what she seems to feel. it’s that thin line between having the courage to fully give yourself to love and being afraid of getting hurt.
but it doesn’t really feel like completely unrequited love — it feels more like something that isn’t returned in the same intensity. it’s not a direct rejection, it’s something more subtle, unspoken. what really hurts him is her lack of reaction. it’s not a clear “no”, it’s silence, constant doubt. and the poem captures perfectly that feeling of giving so much of yourself without knowing if anything is coming back.

this part makes that very clear:

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*Your lack of reaction
to everything I do
makes me question
how much of me I’ve already given you
without thinking —
and without getting anything back.

And honestly,
you can’t measure that.
I didn’t expect anything,
but I admit:
it hurts to receive nothing.*

this just tears you apart in a way that’s hard to even explain. like I said in the beginning, the poem really puts you in the speaker’s place — and this is exactly what I mean.
but the real peak of the poem is the speaker’s emotional surrender. there’s the confession, the “doubt”, but the way he gives himself is what makes it so memorable, especially in these parts, which I honestly loved:
*Let’s ignore humanity for a second,
take the risk between today and eternity.
I’m reaching out my hand to you
and I have no idea where we’re going.
If you want to come with me,
the only thing I can promise
is that with every breath, step, smile,
or smallest thing I do…
I will love you.

The truth is obvious:
I’m not very good at this,
but I’m trying to learn —
I swear I am.

And even if everything collapsed one day,
if that day ever came…
I need you to know:
with the word of a poet
and the vow of someone in love,
you were and always will be
the only person I loved
enough to give my heart and my poetry
in such abundance.

There was no one,
and there will be no one, like you.*

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*I’m addicted — don’t blame me.
I got addicted to you,
to your eyes,
to the desires that only exist in my head.
I got addicted to a version of us
written in crooked lines,
imaginary and as complex as reality.

I’m stuck in your love —
if it’s even real, like you said.*

in these parts, the speaker’s desire is to live the world with the person he loves, without caring about anything else, with the promise that she will have his love in every moment — in every step, every breath. here, he presents his love as the greatest treasure he can give her. it’s like he’s letting her look inside his soul, and that’s something purely beautiful. especially near the end, when he says she was the only person he gave both his poetry and his heart to — no one else had him that deeply. that makes everything even more meaningful, showing that intimacy goes far beyond physical desire.

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and that other part I mentioned, where he says he became addicted to her and to every detail about her, brings a really interesting perspective. it’s not exactly emotional dependence — it feels more like a connection. he gave the purest love he had and saw in her someone he could pour all his poetry into, in the form of love. that creates a connection, even if throughout the poem it sometimes feels like that connection exists mostly on his side — like when he questions whether her love “is even real, like you said.” it’s not just dependency — it’s love, even if uncertain.
And the brief mention of time as both an ally and an enemy is simply incredible. it works as both hope and threat. on one hand, he has “plenty of time” to love her; on the other, he fears waiting too long and missing the moment. that creates a quiet urgency, like: “I can wait… but should I?” at its core, the whole poem seems to revolve around a question that never gets answered: “and you?”
the speaker opens up completely, exposes himself entirely… but doesn’t know what comes from the other side. there’s no answer, and that leaves everything feeling suspended, incomplete — which might be exactly the feeling the poem wants to create.

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this poem is incredibly loving and painful to read. at least for me, it leaves a mix of tightness in the chest and a sense of beauty. anyone who has gone through something like this, or even something close, will be able to connect with it — to feel in the speaker’s place, even if not with the same intensity. that space of vulnerability, of loving someone more than you can control, and not knowing if it will become something real. the poem doesn’t try to solve anything — it just shows the feeling in its raw form, with all its contradictions. and that’s exactly what makes it so powerful.

I loved it.

AND PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR GOING SO LONG WITHOUT READING YOUR POEMS!!! I'M YOUR NUMBER 1 FAN!

pulsar sage
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OMG

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PRINCE

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IM SO GLAD YOU HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
DANG

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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE BIG REVIEW

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AS ALWAYS

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YOU GOT IT AAAL

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pulsar sage
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BROTHERS

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TY!

toxic kelp
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This poem is a beautiful confession as is a painful irony. To love with so much passion, even through all the fears, that's as passionate as it gets crying

You're amazing Rico, keep it up. We'll get through this NoizeLoves bear_hugging

lone tusk
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that's so beautiful 🥹
super poem vro this

pulsar sage
pulsar sage
rough grove
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rico, YOU ARE PERFECT OH MY GOD

pulsar sage