My Endless

[tulip palm]

I don't know who this was written for but I know you must love them very much and I can only pray they know that

[tawny ether]

firstly, this is such a sweet poem: filled with love and endless respect for the person.... and the feelings hidden in the poets heart too.... even common day-to day things are elucidated with such detail and creativity

Your dampness carries everything forward,
pooling in the seams of now

this line is slightly confusing tho

"seams of now"

can you explain it to me?

also

I love the emotions and imagery in this, although I believe it can have more metaphors and poetic devices to increase the depth

"Precision and subtlety come from control of language, imagery, and restraint. You already have the emotional instinct; now it’s about sharpening how you express it."
And that is exactly what i shall say to you

but you are AMAZING!!

[tawny copper]

yeah I feel the same way tbh.

its more of a filler im struggling with that part

[tawny ether]

I was given the same advice so many times 😅
so i thought of giving it too haha

[tawny copper]

I just edited it back to my original

but I felt like it was lacking, and think I tried to make it more fancy rather than how I just felt

also not my typical style of poetry I tend to write

so I appreciate all the feedback, truly