#A Past I Despised

1 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

ocean shuttle
#

You're all I have,
You're the only one I've ever trusted,
But what if trust wasn't enough?
You are my true best friend,
The one I've had the worst of fights with,
Yet the only one whose shoulder feels right.

We talk everyday,
But we're nothing like we used to be.
We share everything even now,
But the laughs we shared are no more found.

Is this what growing up feels like?
To lose what once was all you had.
To beg God for a day to spend with the ones you love,
Yet never see the day arrive?

If so,I refuse to grow up.
Take me back to that ninth grade bus,
Which was the beginning of us.
Our laughs,our talks,our friendship.

Take me back to a time
When life wasn't a series of lies
But a collection of friends that felt like a prize.

Take me back to the guys,
Who never left my side.
Take me back to the girls,
Who never betrayed my mind.
Take me back to the very past,
That I despised.

twin island
#

Well, i am new here not an expert exactly but the poem is really nice. It is really nostalgic, emotional and personal. The last stanza really hits "take me back to the past that i despised" such a good line. I think expanding you're vocabulary can help you a bit. But overall, i really enjoyed reading this poem it has the power to make a person feel and that's very important.

ocean shuttle
#

I can take any other criticism you have into consideration too

twin island
#

Welcome!!! Nothing else i can criticize tbh i am a beginner too. Vocabulary is also my weakness, i think all newbies have to deal with it but we'll learn eventually. I just wanna say you got a lot of potential and i wish you the best on you're poet journey!!!

runic saffron
#

It's a very beautiful poem. I really love how it feels real and soul ripping. It deals with truths of life not everyone faces boldly. So yes. In a nutshell, it's great and I'd love to read more like this!

analog gladeBOT
ocean shuttle
#

A lot of my poems fall in the sad category so