leaden rose
Every so often I get banished to despondency island
It's a special hell that coaxes the suffering out of me
My never-land of ghosts of my lost boys I loved too much
And now I bear the cost of holding hearts that hunger to hurt me
A home from hell away from home I visit every time my heart toes the line
Between the ripped seams of reality and what could be
And my theme park of haunting holds me over and over
As I lose the reason I worked so hard to regain
The last time I escaped from this asylum of mistakes
That strip me of my dignity and leave a ragged doll
In my place
My ferris wheels of memory spin uncontrollably
Until the rust eats every glimmer of joy that once maimed my pain
I’m lost in the moment where he forgot my name
And I wander through our rotting carnival of blame
I’ll take the flight out of here but I know i’ll end up here the same
My hauntings loan me the audacity to leave this damned place
But I know that I still owe them embrace
gleaming heart
livid reef
