#Wild Love (written not as a doc)

11 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

muted igloo
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Wild Love
Making today a bit more bright
No crying today
No getting ears in my sight

I am gonna do anything for u hun
Run for u
Die for u
I am gonna get anything for u done

Not making it easy
We’re gonna have some fun
We be enjoying here
They’re gonna run

Might sound evil
but it has the fun

Setting our future right
Escaping from the dark side
Not losing today
Not losing my pride
This thing is decided that
You’re gonna be my bride

You’re eyes
You’re hair
You’re killing me widdat beauty
Please spare
You’re so beautiful
It doesn’t seem fair
Now I need u to smile
Because you know I care

Setting our future right
Escaping from the dark side
Not losing today
Not losing my pride
This thing is decided that
You’re gonna be my bride
Woo!
-By Goku-Black
i was feeling a bit cool and moody that's why i wrote it

crystal rampart
#

Ah, it does feel very much like a song, considering modern contractions and everyday language, but if you wanted to frame it as a poem, then such language sucks away the dignity of the poem. So, as a song, this is decent, though it could use some polishing to get a consistent rhythm.

muted igloo
#

And yeah it is a lil song

crystal rampart
muted igloo
muted igloo
#

@zinc osprey

zinc osprey
#

critique?

muted igloo
zinc osprey
#

i would focus on consistency, consuming advanced literature, and expanding your vocabulary and diction,