I'll keep writing

[violet badge]

@hazy jetty has sent a notification! - @glacial mulch @sharp heron @velvet sky @smoky ridge @rose veldt @worthy vigil @fiery skiff @leaden egret @idle raft @steel heron @mild birch @lime light @solar yacht @lusty swan @wispy crest @tight geyser @hearty vessel @marsh trench @stray dune @turbid light @fading pine @warm shell @reef light @dapper obsidian @solar fossil @gaunt hemlock @stuck owl @humble pier @carmine saddle @earnest orbit @drowsy ginkgo @open shadow @crystal creek @floral lake @rustic forge

[gaunt hemlock]

Is this the dud

[hazy jetty]

yerr

I'm stained

by his memories

@dusk herald @mild vapor @north nebula

[gaunt hemlock]

Gotta venti it out

[hazy jetty]

andddd I'll be pinging the rest later

[hazy jetty]

how

it'll be the same thing said

js move on

think positive

don't blame urself

bla bla bla

[gaunt hemlock]

Uh r u giving me advice

Or the advice ppl told ya

[hazy jetty]

dis lolz

[gaunt hemlock]

Ah ok ok

[gaunt hemlock]

Nah

U just have to venti when u feel like it

With time it'll leave

So no need to force urself to move on

[hazy jetty]

idts

buh okay

yer

thank youu

for thattt

[gaunt hemlock]

Ofccc

[gaunt hemlock]

Welp that's fine

[hazy jetty]

yeap

I'll js keep writing til I feel better lolz

[gaunt hemlock]

Exsactly

[north nebula]

Looooveee itt

[hazy jetty]

<@&1145760802666717234>

[hazy jetty]

@crude sphinx

@bleak acorn

[mild vapor]

Break Those Chains

i belieeve in you

you can do it

teach me to write poems tooey

[hazy jetty]

thank youu I really hope so

[mild vapor]

https://tenor.com/view/the-woobles-woobles-pierre-penguin-cheerleader-gif-12509240942260499237

[hazy jetty]

js write and write that's what I'll say write even if it's trash and u can edit it later and read and watch lots of poems

see what they do and observe and give it a try

[hazy jetty]

thanks also please leave a star

[hazy jetty]

@half owl

[hazy jetty]

@idle tapir

[hazy jetty]

@errant quartz would appreciate some feedback I hope you don't mind being tagged

[hazy jetty]

@torpid pond

[torpid pond]

Oh that up one is yours?

Oh to have a girl who will yearn like this

[hazy jetty]

yeshh

[hazy jetty]

um it's not yearning it's being stuck in an abusive bond and breaking out but suffering

but thanks lolz

[torpid pond]

In my sense, breaking out is yearning

[hazy jetty]

#1438561291332616272 this is abt a guy I love so yer

[hazy jetty]

ouhh

[torpid pond]

You write so well

Also don't mind, I'm a fast reader

[hazy jetty]

thank you so muchhh

ping me in a poem of urs I'd love to read

[hazy jetty]

would appreciate a star

[torpid pond]

Yeah i will, I was searching for lyrics-

[hazy jetty]

yeah I saw lolz

nice sonh

*song

[torpid pond]

I think I should post mine, I need to post one on insta anyway

[lament ravine]

*I think I should post

mine, I need to post one on

insta anyway*

- sarthak050504

[hazy jetty]

ouhh also can I tag u in a few other poems

[torpid pond]

Sure go ahead

[hazy jetty]

sorry for the many pings

[humble pier]

ur turn to drop de lore

[hazy jetty]

nope

<@&1145760802666717234> <@&1144090752457113794>

[humble pier]

BRUHHH

u made me spill all ma sh

[hazy jetty]

hehehehe

mine isn't anything interesting

[humble pier]

STILL UNFAIR

[hazy jetty]

lolz wot do u wanna know

[humble pier]

AS IF MINE WAS ANY INTERESTING

[hazy jetty]

VERY

[humble pier]

whole lore literally

[hazy jetty]

see nth interesting

[humble pier]

THIS IS NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING

[hazy jetty]

yer no one expects dat

so most poems were abt dat

[humble pier]

i thought it was a muse breh

[hazy jetty]

#1438561291332616272 this is abt one

[humble pier]

dayum dat name is deliciously creative

[hazy jetty]

thanks lolz

@solar fossil

[hazy jetty]

thank you so muchh

[hazy jetty]

@obtuse shale @cosmic crane

@north nebula

[north nebula]

I LOVE ITT

THE WAY YOU RHYME AHHH

Perfect rhythm, always

[hazy jetty]

I'M SMILING SO WIDE THANK YOUU

[north nebula]

AWH OFCC

[half owl]

Have a star ⭐ and a ❤️
I am not qualified to offer any further comment, beyond, I like it.

[languid helm]

Wonderful! @half owl has just progressed to level 2!

[shy bramble]

Beautiful one!

[cosmic crane]

“i rotted in his hand, but i pretended it was soft, not sharp.” man this is one of the most heartbreaking things i’ve ever read. you knew it was destroying you, but you called it love bc you wanted so badly for it to be.🥹 “i’m the book— but he knows every word” n that metaphor is powerful. he doesn’t just knw ur story,he knws how it’s written. and that kind of intimacy is hard to walk away from, even when it’s toxic

[hazy jetty]

THANK YOU

THANK YOU SO MUCH

CUZ U SPEAK LIKE YOU UNDERSTAND

AND THAT'S SUCH A GIFT

[hazy jetty]

@daring estuary

[hazy jetty]

@keen herald

[hazy jetty]

@wide slate

[hazy jetty]

@livid coral

[livid coral]

Hello

[hazy jetty]

I would like to know ur thoughts on thisss

[livid coral]

Okie dokie

Wow. I absolutely love this and I think the final stanza is just amazing. Chefs kiss to the final stanza.

Some really emotional terminology such as "I rotted in his hand" - it really showcases how mentally affected you are from the male.

I guess the only piece of feedback I have, is where it says "my eyes fell blind - from his love" -- I dont know if this the best way to write it. Because you go on to say "i rotted in his hand" im unsure how these few lines can share a stanza, if that makes sense?
I may be overanalysing lol.

Maybe write the stanza as this

My eyes-
Blind from his love,
Fixated on his every move
In his love
That twisted into torture.
My mind rotted as our hands touch,
But I pretended
It was soft, not rough.

[hazy jetty]

THANK YOUU SO GLAD YOU LIKE ITTTT and I'll keep them in mind next timeee

[wide slate]

I loveee how you use crimson red in almost all of your poetry 🤌 it is kinda like a signature that this is your poems

[hazy jetty]

lolz I love the word crimson hehe