Charming poem mate!!👏 👏 luv how deep it is!! I really like the last para!! Brilliant 👏 👏 👏
#The Gleam of a Past Story
tawny locust
mystic smelt
👏 takes guts to write such simplistic lines that defy complexity, that draw upon cliches we've all seen in a way that the message is conveyed with absolute clarity.
it's like a vision not bound by vision, that seeks not to shock with the novel but comfort with the known and seen
the absolute freedom from rhythmic constraints is quite laudable- bravo!
mystic smelt
anytime, homie
halcyon edge
This is deep and beautiful it really shows beauty and struggle working as one
opal minnowBOT
Wonderful! @faint thistle has just progressed to level 7!
vivid grove
amazing!! It was so beautiful and deep, each word was perfect, your skill is amazing keep it up.. looking for more of your poems 😊
silk moatBOT
vivid grove
yes definitely i would love to read all of them 😁
opal minnowBOT
yes definitely i would love to read all of them 😁
Wonderful! @vivid grove has just progressed to level 1!
humble plank
I know I don’t have a lot of credibility like other but I love the poem. The idea on how the internal conflict is stated by the concepts made it interesting and pleasant. The only thing I thought was a little off was the double leave part. Just didn’t flow right for me or I’m dumb and read it wrong lol.
mossy bane
great piece!
stuck oar
This is genuinely amazing and the depth and detail it has is wonderful! 10/10 poem.
stuck oar
I’m so glad! I mean them very much :). You’re welcome ^^
fickle shoal
Very interesting poem. I think topic, tone and atmosphere are great and most stanzas flow quiet well despite the lack of rhyme or rythm. there is just that one stanza that fells kinda weird. "My heart speaks
within stillness:
“Why do you come
with such quiet,
and leave just like that,
yet leave behind experiences?”" it feels a bit stilted bc the intonation of the sylabils just dosent feel natural at the start and the "why do you come with such quiet" feels like its missing a sylabel or a word. Exept for this one little thing I think its a great poem with a unique free style.
frozen sonnet
oh my god this is so amazing the detail in it
nice work @faint thistle
this should be in a book somewhere
you should publish this one
this is fire
frozen sonnet
do you mind if i ping u in a poem of mine? if u don't mind of course