@weary axle has sent a notification! - @sonic flint @robust surge @sage hinge @short mist @sacred yarrow @tidal brook @cloud slate @neon iris @broken grove
#there's good everywhere, even when it seems lost
vocal heronBOT
sacred yarrow
I like it! it shows me a different perspective of life, especially because the current era is full of pessimists, your optimistic view on life is really cool. the message im getting from the poem is that you always find a way to see the good in everything (correct me if im wrong). but yeah, its good!
weary axle
I like it! it shows me a different perspective of life, especially because the c...
yesh hehe you're right I still remember like I had this one friend and people would say it's a red flag okay but I was so blind to it but they did have a good side too and most people just don't see it I want people to understand that yk even when everyone says its a big red flag there's a good side a soft part in them too
sage hinge
this is such a good poem.. always try to find positiveness even when anything goes wrong
weary axle
this is such a good poem.. always try to find positiveness even when anything go...
yesh and thank you
weary axle
@queen flame forgot about this one..
queen flame
Fourth stanza is way too true
queen flame
Kinda
queen flame
yes 😭
weary axle
yes 😭
ouch- well agreed on it but in my defense there is a good side in everyone sooo
the actual fools are the people that don't give people a second chance or see the bad in them
😌
weary axle
@warm halo
warm halo
omg we think alike
"maybe fooled to think being bad is the only way to survive"
nice one
idk why but ur poems hit different compared to the other ones imo
weary axle
idk why but ur poems hit different compared to the other ones imo
feels special again.. thank you so very much 💐
weary axle
@loud breach
urban trout
🫂🫂🫂 My My My My oh My
weary axle
🫂🫂🫂 My My My My oh My
haha I understand that language very well and thank you so very much
@rich cloud
weary axle
@gritty hare
merry halo
the issue is that although you've already got a great message and have a solid idea of it, all your verses don't tie together all that well.
- artistic expression. most of the ideas you want to express aren't dont very well. You give us a lot of situations and i suppose for a lack of better terms, instances, where your theme is demonstrated, but it's not very fitting for poetry. This style fits more for prose I believe (correct me if i'm wrong lmao) or other forms of writing. Poetry is about expressing ideas in a creative way, so think outside the box!
- lack of rhythm, rhyme, or anything to enhance its flow. at parts it sounds off, and the lines don't flow so well together. I suggest rewriting and testing out different words, styles, phrasing, etc.
- the finish is (and I don't mean to be rude or anything) pretty awful. i thought it was building up to something, only for it pretty much let me down. i felt like your last stanza was your climax, but you just ended it right there. there wasn't any closing note for me to think about, and in general the idea wasn't tied together so well
i definitely think you could reconsider the style and phrasing of your verses, and even reimagine it to make it more artistic. of course, this is just what I think makes poetry attractive, so only consider it if you think i actually make sense 😭
sorry if it was also a bit incoherent im running on 5 hours of sleep and im going crazy
yap yap