Pleiades and you

[static summit]

Away when all light goes'
Your luminance out of all flows
From eyes mine you all look so close
When I look again the distance grows

Far away with treacherous ways,
I may never meet you I murmur in dismay
My guide to stellar were you seven
So close, so close yet so far from heaven

I believe another day may come
When a youth looks and wonders where you're from
Become someone's guide, someone's beacon once more
Seven sisters I will miss you evermore

[snow gale]

@static summit has sent a notification! - @stiff thunder @warm wraith @lime remnant

[static summit]

@clever loom

[clever loom]

Whom did you fall in love with TT

[static summit]

someone 😝

how do you like it?

[clever loom]

Can you elaborate on what you meant by the last line of the poem!

[static summit]

seven sisters is referring to both the cluster of stars and her, at that time she was gonnna delete all her socials and so i said when that happened i shall miss her evermore

[clever loom]

Well are you gonna marry her cause TT

[static summit]

and as for the startcluster part due to pullution the stars were getting less visible

[static summit]

after my PhD in Sha Allah

[clever loom]

Nice catch

[clever loom]

Mashallah brother ✨

[static summit]

my true passion is the stars, so ofc i'd catch that 😝

anyways whats the protocol on the critique?

[clever loom]

So you're into astronomy

[clever loom]

Wdym 😭

[clever loom]

Even the stars could not replicate the shine his eyes illuminate

[static summit]

I mean give critique innit

[clever loom]

It's good enough on its own lol

And bro don't ask me for tips i myself write any poem under 10 minutes no matter the length of it

[static summit]

Hehe thanks

[static summit]

Same???! Lmao I write in sub 15 mins

@clever loom

[clever loom]

Fr

[timid estuary]

Good poem

I love how simple it is as it helps the reader understand

[static summit]

Thank you!!

[stiff thunder]

I love the way this poem is, its simple and nice

[static summit]

thank you so much my guy

[static summit]

@long basin

[long basin]

Oh okay hold on! WHERE WERE YOU HIDING THIS MASTERPIECE FROM MEUNTIL NOW!!! I LOVE THIS!!!! especially cuz its on stars!! (I love ocean, moon and stars so much)
My fav is the first stanza cuz it really shows how deeply the authour loves her even though they are far away. Giving long distance vibe fr!

First of all I think this poem is about someone who you love so deeply but is far away yet the authour loves them so much(lucky them frr) and is waiting and believe a day will come when they can finally meet! And idk its like sometimes the author feels like they are so close within reach yet at the same time they seem so far away so I feel its like whenever authour talks to them, spends time with them they really think they are close but then they are reminded of their long distance so authour thinks they are far away? Maybe its like physically far awya yet emotionally close? Or like they seem withing reach when you talk and spends time but once the screens off the distance lingers again. I really feel like it is about long distance relationships I get the vibes!!
You have capture the ache of longing so well!! Which you especially feels in long distance relationships.

ANALYSIS

Stanza 1 - It's about author's deep love for them and how authour misses them! Sometimes to the author they seems so close but at the same moment they seem out of reach(due to the last line in thsi stanza I felt like it was about long distance).

Stanza 2 - maybe its about author's overthinking and doubt's? Like sometimes the author is sitting and thinks WHAT IF... they may never meet? What if they never overcomes the diatance? And it shows how author misses them too. So overall I think it's about lingering doubts and how they are so far away.

Stanza 3 - its maybe about hope! That one day may be they will be in reach, one day they will meet! (I guess like one end the pain of long distance will end) I can legit feel the longing in the last two lines!!

And maybe I feel like seven sister symbolise them?
Due to the sequence of stanza it feels like in the 3rd stanza the author has finally overcomed the doubt's borned due to overthinking and is having hopes once again! Love this so much!!!!💞💞💞

And I feel like the first two lines shows the start of their long distance. Like "Away when all light goes' Your luminance out of all flows" these lines they really shows authors feelings like even they are far away author still cheriah the moments with them. Like in the darkness of the long distance, the moments they spent become the light for the authour which still lingers in their heart.

[static summit]

Ohhhhhh You've got a good eye for romantic poems

How many novels have you read?

😝😝

This poem it's a double entendre

It depends on where you look at it from

[long basin]

Lmao I'm glad! I never knew I had an eye for it😌💞

[static summit]

It can be taken directly (just the stars because I love stars and astronomy and I have a past with the seven sisters/the pleiades) and the stars also symbolise me and her

The distance is not only physical distance but also emotional distance

We were not on good terms when I wrote this poem

[static summit]

It seems you have read quite a lot of romantic literature 😝😝

[long basin]

I don't read much novels😭 but I read stuffs like thriller, murder, mystery, suspense, action ones more lol. But I have seen many romantic movies and drama's I do say!

[long basin]

Ohhh! Now I love it even more!!!!!

[static summit]

So that's how you get your romantic genius huh 😏😏

[static summit]

One of my best 😝

[long basin]

Ooh cool!! I didn't it was actually about your love life😭 you really captured the feeling of longing and distance so well!!

[static summit]

It's my second ever poem like before this I wrote 3 years ago

[long basin]

Ohh niw this adds even more depths to the poem!! You really crafted your emotions well into this poem!!! Love it so much!!!(* >ω<)

[static summit]

The Istanbul one

[long basin]

Not much lol I'm kinda surprised it seems that way cuz I don't read much except poetries lol. I really wished my textbooks had romantic poetries cuz that way I would be able to read it more.

[long basin]

Damn I'm glad! That's some new info unlocked lol😆 I hope it may help me if I have a partner in future lol

[long basin]

Wait you have only written two poems??? Wow You are so good at this!!

[distant vine]

*Wait you have only

written two poems??? Wow You

are so good at this!!*

- oceanhealer.

[static summit]

Maturity is what helps in relationships, remember that okayy?

[long basin]

I remember that one!! But vaguely cuz I did saw it few days ago!

[static summit]

No I've written more 😭😭 i mens this is my second poem

[static summit]

That was my first ever poem

[long basin]

Yess I will!! And I think emotional intelligence too!! Well anyways I don't wanna be in relationships. Cuz I think I want deep emotional connection where you communicate well and understands each other and I love too much so I think I will get hurt if I ever love in my life😭 so I'm never planning to love. Gonna stay single🫡

[long basin]

Wait it was your first poem!!!? It wa so so so good!!! You are a poetry genius bro!!

Should write more!

[long basin]

Ohh😭 i get it now still for your second poem its so good!!

[static summit]

The thing is, poems like these come only after some time of rest and spontaneous inspiration almost like divine revelation

[static summit]

Avoid relationship because they're haram frfr

[long basin]

Ooooo I do agree. Its like sometimes randomly you get the thought like boom and you write!

[static summit]

The thing is, I'm trying to write more like Iqbal as you can see in my "the godless" poem because useless poetry is discouraged in islam innit

[long basin]

Yep thats one of reason too!! So I always have and always will avoid them!!

[static summit]

In Sha Allah! May Allah protect you and me

[long basin]

Oooh damn! I believe you will do well whatever you write. I agree should follow the religion🫡!

[long basin]

Ameen!! May Allah always guide us to the right path✨️

[solemn vector]

@static summit Love this. Love the meaning and metaphor. Would love for you to read the one I just posted in the same vein of using the stars as metaphors.. ❤️

[static summit]

Ameen in Sha Allah

[static summit]

I'll be sure to give it a look