I'm such a good person.
I got a new water bottle, I gave it all it needed.
I cleaned it, filled it with water and kept it on the table.
I'm such a great person.
Occasionally, as I felt I needed some H2O, I went to the bottle, drank some water and kept it back.
Give and take, fair, no?
I care so much.
Seldom, I went there, took what I needed and gave back my very important time to the bottle.
I try so hard at times.
Just born kind like that.
But today, I went there...I felt thirsty.
All the other bottles were being impossible
So I went to the one I give importance to
But it was empty.
No water. No response. No help.
So selfish.
That too after all I did for it?
#The Water Bottle Theory
mystic mortar
First fully metaphorical poem. I hope the message gets conveyed because for the first time it feels somehow...not well written. Like the message isn't concise. Lmk either way. Thanks!
coarse hollow
*I'm such a good person.
I got a new water bottle, I gave it all it needed.
I cl...
This was incredibly clever!! The concept and presentation is fantastic, and the meaning couldn't be made any clearer. I love the way you compared how we treat water bottles, to how we treat other ppl,like it's a really clever idea. The poem is also incredibly relatable, something that I think makes for the best poetry. Overall, i think this is a fantastic poem with a clear point!
mystic mortar
This was incredibly clever!! The concept and presentation is fantastic, and the ...
Thanks a ton! I'm so glad to hear you liked it 😊
devout mirage
*I'm such a good person.
I got a new water bottle, I gave it all it needed.
I cl...
hey this is pretty cool, I wrote something similar years ago so this was kind of a flashback. good work
limpid patrol
First fully metaphorical poem. I hope the message gets conveyed because for the ...
The message came out very well. It's nice concise and doesn't feel forced, like I always feel my work does.
final scarabBOT
The message came out very well. It's nice concise and doesn't feel forced, like ...
Wonderful! @limpid patrol has just pregressed to level 2!
mystic mortar
@devout mirage @limpid patrol
Thank you for reading! Really happy the message got conveyed...
mystic mortar
The message came out very well. It's nice concise and doesn't feel forced, like ...
Also i don't think you mean that. I'm pretty sure your pieces are great!
reef timberBOT
limpid patrol
Also i don't think you mean that. I'm pretty sure your pieces are great!
I'm a very self deprecating soul....I'm working on it....barely
final scarabBOT
I'm a very self deprecating soul....I'm working on it....barely
Wonderful! @limpid patrol has just pregressed to level 3!
mystic mortar
I'm a very self deprecating soul....I'm working on it....barely
Barely working on it is still working on it. Even the best poets had 'forced' days.
