#Winter caves

13 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

lone mirage
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White-powder weighs heavy on the silent landscape
Serenity slipping through frozen vegetation,
as my stride aimlessly lands on icy ground.

A sinkhole internally, much like the land beneath,
Pleading desperately from its cavernous soul
for a wisp of warmth or a hint of heat

My deafening screams traverse its echoing maze
As desperation inside guides the vessel with apathy.
Slowly losing friction and faltering off

Yet suddenly, a dim-iridescence ignites a path through endless tunnels
Bringing life to the lifeless body and mind
Weakly, but enough to envision a way out

Her voice.

The white melts off, replaced slowly
By a field of summer sand; soft and sturdy
Insulating its heat below me,
A force field through these emotionless walls

Her vision.

Springs the first bloom of Mayflower,
A seed and ship of new beginnings
Emigrating outwardly to its target.

Her writings.

    Justifies the swaths of crowds basking in the sudden warmth
      Dense in their well-defined features
   And singularly discerned with photographic memory

Perhaps, a cherished nurturing of the present Summer
Leaves the cruel winter of caves a distant past
And the future whole again

radiant pecanBOT
lone mirage
# lone mirage White-powder weighs heavy on the silent landscape Serenity slipping through froz...

I dig this! Really euphonic but also narratively organic to me - the action between the scene and the voice of the poem was this intense trip inside the self that combo'd well with the eery, icy, kind of feeling of fresh set snow and just how heavy but echoing it can feel

A lot of the metrical structures felt purposeful and pretty damn juicy as well, and they stood out to me in a big way - the imagery felt sweeping but bound by this discipline that lends the piece for me a sense of timelessness in the moment which is a cool effect: it's soothing but really melancholic for me dwelling on the passing and just the moment of yearning for better weather

Thanks for sharing ❤️ here's to hoping for warmer weather sooner than later maybe!

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Lineation really compounds the depth, and the structures feel really purposefully bound imo

late vessel
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Ooo I love this a lot! The second to last stanza is amazing and I love how you ended it, it's really good! I love this

lone mirage
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This is beautiful ❤️ SobbinTheLanaDelReyOut

lone mirage
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g

worn ore
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@worn ore SELF PING!

half monolith
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holy hell

lone mirage
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just playing im really glad you liked it

half monolith
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an absolutely gorgeous love poem filled with themes of nature and gratitude for a lover, its a wonderful musing. especially fleshing out each of their affects with their own stanzas