#Osmosed, I Lie In Wait

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quaint fiber
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Welcome to my standstill- Dragyn.

          *Osmosed, I lie in wait*



                  I die everyday.

             Osmosed, I lie in wait.

          The whole of me, divided.

            *Osmosed, I lie in wait.*

    Evil thoughts from bad memories.
   The dark flowering of a wilted rose. 

      
       I burn bridges like calories.
I feed off of the fires that chain react…

           *Osmosed, I lie in wait.*

 *Nepotism, Narcissism, Neurodivergent,*
    *Narcosis, Nearsighted,* **Nervous**
 **Nightmares, Nightmares,** *neutered.*

          *Osmosed, I lie in wait.*

           I house so much, so much pain.
    These neurons, fire, in my brain.
           If the home is where the heart is,
        Yet the wind carries me, 

       is it all in Vain-Vein-Vane? 

          Osmosed, I lie…

I lie to myself, the world, the grass that grows,
Believing in hollow earth, as I lost ground.

Stippling in the gaps in between my judgment,

Trying to be out-of-the-box, in the lost and found.

Foresight of a glass eye, rhinestone likeness,
How am I supposed to be someone to care about?

        *Osmosed, I lie in wait.*

A split decision, not by choice alone.

Send-me-down a chemical trail; pheromones.

Grown-Groan while I pencil homophones.

Contradictions twist my mind into vertigo.

         *My heart shows for all;*
            *To each their own.*
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native totemBOT
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@quaint fiber has sent a notification! - @languid kernel @next remnant @whole knoll @deep crown

quaint fiber
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@nocturne finch

languid kernel
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jar poem

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🚨🚨🚨🚨

quaint fiber
languid kernel
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i skimmed through it 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Will read in-depth in a bit, about to go somewhere

quaint fiber
languid kernel
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but i gotta point out: I burn bridges like calories

DUDE
LEAVE SOME BANGER LINES FOR THE REST OF US

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PLEASE

quaint fiber
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😭😭😭

languid kernel
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ITS SUCH A WEIRD SIMILE

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HELP

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I love it

quaint fiber
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I AM WIERD

languid kernel
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I KNOW

quaint fiber
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WIERD

languid kernel
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WIERD

quaint fiber
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I MISSPELLED IT TWICE

languid kernel
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🙏🙏🙏

deep crown
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Trying to be out of the box in the lost and found

quaint fiber
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Indeed

deep crown
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OH TO GIVE ACTUAL FEEDBACK IM IN LOVE WITH IT

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Lol

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Well penned man

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You always have crazy lines that are super imaginative, striking balance between playfulness and expression that gives the whole poem a surprisingly topical vibe of instability

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This one especially though is teetering

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And I love that amount of expression

languid kernel
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Just like all of your poems, this is fabulous to read and a real headache to decipher (in a good way dw)
With the rhythms, pacing and rhymes, this poem does show your rap abilities more than some of your other pieces (like "The Boy and a Lampshade" for instance). Lines with assonance like Fore__sight__ of a glass eye, __rhine__stone __like__ness and lines like I house so much, so much pain./These neurons, fire, in my brain. with perfectly balanced syllable count, effective repetition of "so much", and multiple SUPERB syllable stresses - it all amalgamates and ends up in a stimulating ensemble. I also really particularly like your use of anaphoras here. By coming back to the title again and again, the speaker communicates this specific kind of "lazy urgency" - by this I mean that the reader understands that the speaker is waiting, "osmosed", which isn't alarming on its own. It's when the same phrase is repeated and hammered home that the sense of urgency starts to show, and that makes for a really epic buildup.
The interesting thing about osmosis to me is that the word designates both a chemical phenomenon and a gradual process of assimilating knowledge. I'd like to interpret the phrase "Osmosed, I lie in wait" as a combination of the two meanings - the meaning in chemistry is pretty visualizable as one can imagine the speaker being pushed through a membrane. Then, when the other definition is considered, both meanings can be associated; through this physical thing happening to the speaker, they are gradually assimilating knowledge, ideas, ideologies, etc. Now, the "membrane" filtering the speaker - plus, kind of the totality of this line - is most definitely a metaphor in any case. But since I'm not in your head... I don't know what kind of things you've been exposed to, and I think it's good to leave it open-ended. Everyone takes away a different piece from this poem.
And btw: Osmosed, I lie/ I lie to myself🤌🔥. That's a fantastic lil twist.

sudden thorn
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i burn bridges like calories

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what if i slept on the highway tonight

languid kernel
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there are a lot of real banger lines - "The dark flowering of a wilted rose.", for example. You're really great at this kind of thing where you take pretty simple yet evocative words and assemble amazing imagery. I'm just in love with the simplicity and beauty of that verse.
I ALSO JUST ADORE THE "BURNING BRIDGES LIKE CALORIES" - it's not just weird and funny and creative, it also makes sense. If you start burning bridges as if they are calories, it's like it has just become something normal and mundane. You do literally burn calories just by moving - this is a splendid way of communicating fragility, instability, and shaky relations

languid kernel
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gosh i could analyze every single line in this poem, but i don't know when to stop!

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@quaint fiber you got a major knack for blending simplicity and diction of a really high caliber

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plus utilizing rhythms and wordplay in outrageously creative ways

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(YOU AND YOUR HOMOPHONES FRRR)

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I just have comments on little tiny edits you could make:
Beliving in hollow earth, as I lost ground. "Beliving" is probably meant to be "believing", im guessing? your keyboard must still hate you.
Also just note that if you're going for perfect end rhymes in the last 5 verses. "anemone" is pronounced uh-nem-uh-nee and doesn't rhyme with the other words

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god now i found this line: "Grown-Groan while I pencil homophones."
I'm like a toddler in a candy shop when i walk around your poems

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Gr__ow__n-Gr__oa__n while I pencil h__o__m__o__ph__o__nes.

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/ / x x / x / x /

spondee, pyrrhic, trochee, amphimacer

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that's damn cool

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Well, in conclusion

sudden thorn
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i burn bridges like calories

quaint fiber
quaint fiber
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@delicate bison drops you here gently

delicate bison
sudden thorn
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btw

quaint fiber
quaint fiber
sudden thorn
delicate bison
sudden thorn
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i js woke up leave me alone 🤞

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this is so embarrassing bc that’s like my fav bar

quaint fiber
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its liek a triple entandre though

sudden thorn
delicate bison
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huh interesting, I didn't really see the poem as having that theme but I'll reread it with that in mind

quaint fiber
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the poem is about being split and conflicted

sudden thorn
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speak to me in dumbass terms

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pls

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are you rapping

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this was hard but i feel like i need to decipher your REPLY

quaint fiber
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Someone who is divided, can mess up relationships, and in the poem the next verse explains that they feed off the conflict of the issues caused by being split

sudden thorn
shell phoenixBOT
sudden thorn
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thank u

quaint fiber
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no problem

sudden thorn
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MY LEG IS HURTINGG SO BAD

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CRAMP

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anyway this whole thing is fire

quaint fiber
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thank you

sudden thorn
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quite literally, too

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cause the poem reminds me of fire

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a WILDFIRE

native totemBOT
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@sudden thorn is now following @quaint fiber.

sudden thorn
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for this banger

nocturne finch
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Omg wow visa, I love this what, the format is really nice and I loved itt

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Amazing poem buddy

quaint fiber
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@deft vault

quaint fiber
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@sullen garnet

sullen garnet
# quaint fiber Welcome to my standstill- Dragyn. *Osmosed, I lie in wait* ...

Throughout the poem, I've noticed a tension between the desire for clarity and the realization that such clarity may be unreachable. The reference to “a glass eye, rhinestone likeness” suggests subtle detachement from reality or living in an almost "false" or "superficial" manner. The speaker has this longing to be cared for, but also wonders how they can be “someone to care about,” there's almost.. self-doubt. This is echoed in the lines “I lie to myself, the world, the grass that grows,” (if I'm not getting this wrong suggests a disconnection from the world, perhaps from a loss of belief or meaning.

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also FIREE LINE "I burn bridges like calories" HELLO⁉️

quaint fiber
quaint fiber
eager bluff
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I think that made my vessel pop. Lime a rock- et ships me way for a lit- tire all fire... brain dammmm -age got to me, for I don't know what I can't see.

quaint fiber
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This resonates with me

eager bluff
# quaint fiber This resonates with me

Me too! I'll have to read this a few times, I'm terribly new to advanced poetic devices and don't quite understand what I'm trying to parce outta this one. But it is good and I enjoyed the ride, curiously though, you tend to layer more than twice, ye?

Also- is it wrong to be poetic in review of poetic or is that redundant?

quaint fiber
quaint fiber
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The poem is about being in half within yourself

eager bluff
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I understood that. I only read it once, but this one will need three passes for my mind to click it into place.

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Is it osmo-sed?

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or os mos ed

quaint fiber
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Osmos-ed

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Like

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Os mose duh