#..

35 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

hasty quiverBOT
#

@serene root has sent a notification! - @wheat scarab

tidal obsidian
#

For in each of us, a seed takes root,
of stardust born, in cosmos’ suit. Nice metaphors here!

serene root
wintry ibex
#

The last two lines don't connect well with the middle

serene root
#

The middle lines focus on the fleeting brilliance of human existence, comparing them to bright, brief notes in a cosmic song.

Last two lines introduce the idea that each of us carries something timeless & vast reinforcing the connection back to cosmos while subtly shifting to the notion of continuity & potential within each of us.

#

Care to explain the disconnect issue ?

wintry ibex
#

I get the idea

#

But I don't see why "each of us carries something timeless & vast reinforcing the connection back to cosmos" causes "the fleeting brilliance of human existence"

#

I mean when you put it like this it kinda makes sense

#

But the agent in the middle part sounds like the humans not their brilliance

serene root
#

Well you are trying to read poetry literally dear…that’s both the curse & beauty of it.

wintry ibex
#

what you said isn't poetry but it also doesn't make sense tho

tough duneBOT
#

*what you said isn't

poetry but it also

doesn't make sense tho*

- typingguy72
wintry ibex
serene root
wintry ibex
serene root
#

I was talking about the poem not my comment

#

😂

wintry ibex
shrewd relicBOT
wintry ibex
#

"People are stardust (Technically unfound claim)"

tepid socket
#

This is pretty good! Short but amazing

#

Love itt

serene root
tribal stirrup
serene root
#

@dense furnace

serene root
#

@lunar ginkgo

lunar ginkgo
deft meteor
#

The poem is short but the rhyme and rythm are brilliant

serene root
sinful wigeon
#

Decent but a bit lecture-toned.

serene root