Identity in Ruin

[rain pecan]

I’d appreciate any feedback. Yes this is political 😞

[pearl cedar]

maybe merge line 3 with line 2, other than that, OMG IS THIS YOUR FIRST POEM THIS IS AMAZING

also same with line 9 to 8

for merging

[rain pecan]

yeah the formatting was messed up by the app, they were together before >.<

But yes, this is my first..."post college" poem, I havent written anything since I left college, like I've written before ofc

aghhhhh ofc the formatting >.<

is the message clear tho

[pearl cedar]

yes

[rain pecan]

yay! thats all I was hoping for honestly

thanks!

[glacial moon]

Amazing poem! I like the chemistry and the chemistry of the rain and the speaker. Keep writing!

[rain pecan]

thanks! but um the rain?

[glacial moon]

I thought it is oxidised, so it must be because of mist or rain? Oh, I misread the title. Identity in Ruin

[rain pecan]

oh, its oxidized copper! so like when copper goes from gold to a bluish color