harsh cobalt
The title though 👌👌
#Pieces of Poetry on The Floor
turbid sorrel
Tyyy
I hope to find the time and motivation to further extend this story
shell jay
🤔
shell jay
yeah?
laid my weak soul to rest on the bed... / A sigh left the mattress
/
I laid my weary soul to rest upon the bed... / A sigh escaped, sinking into the mattress
marble iron
shell jay
Soul thirsty eyes saw my weakness... / A snap at the wooden bed's legs crippled me —
/
soul’s thirsty eyes saw my own frailty... / A snap at the bed's legs, a sudden jolt through me —
The piercing of eyes were surely intensified... / There was surely a presence that watched me ponder
/
Eyes piercing through the dim, intensified... / A presence watched, unseen, as I pondered
stoic portal
the before sounds fire
eternal irisBOT
the before sounds fire
Wonderful! @stoic portal has just pregressed to level 4!
turbid sorrel
**laid my weak soul to rest on the bed... / A sigh left the mattress**
...
A sigh leaving the mattress is word play on the mattress making a sound when you suddenly lie on it
turbid sorrel
**Soul thirsty eyes saw my weakness... / A snap at the wooden bed's legs cripple...
soul thirsty eyes means a demon thirsty for my soul as he seeks me
sage ferryBOT
shell jay
soul thirsty eyes means a demon thirsty for my soul as he seeks me
I know what it means, i just suggested an alternative dear.
turbid sorrel
**The piercing of eyes were surely intensified... / There was surely a presence ...
Probably the only one i see fit for my poem as i didnt really intend on changing it in the first place
turbid sorrel
I know what it means, i just suggested an alternative dear.
It's a series dear, it is what it is
deft bobcat
random halo
The title is awesome🔥, metaphor use is great and I like the typography you used with the cross outs, great word play in this piece, I like💜
cosmic junco
I love this sm but idk how to feel about it
It was deff fun to read i enjoyed it so much
I absolutely love this its just my feelings abt it are complicated
turbid sorrel
YAY TY
pale kelp
"Laid out, my tired body was free for rent" is the only line i feel iffy about can you explain it to me 😭
OH
turbid sorrel
Demons in general want to take over someone's body or soul
turbid sorrel
✨
pale kelp
but yeah that was amazing
turbid sorrel
I have another poem that has been favorited for its storyteslling as well
maybe youd be interested
pale kelp
at first i thought it was going to be about like "poetry was my light in the darkness" kind of trope but it took a turn i def did not expect
pale kelp
maybe youd be interested
ABSOLUTELY
turbid sorrel
at first i thought it was going to be about like "poetry was my light in the dar...
I want to make this a series, but i needa figure out the right path since i have so many ideas
turbid sorrel
or like demons and paranormal?
yeah yeah