#Up north (revised)

13 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

hollow river
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I have made minor changes to this poem, mostly for rhyme, grammar and flow. The content stays almost the same.

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young abyssBOT
hollow river
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Ooh

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@feral cedar @visual hill @rose hatch

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@warped mantle

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@runic spade

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This poem is about a month old, I re-read it and found many errors. So here we are.

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Note that Kaiko is pronounced kai-koh

feral cedar
hollow river
# feral cedar Wow you write quite gigantic poems, It's a wonderful poem and I like the message...

Thanks! Most of my poems are indeed quite long, but still much shorter than this. This is the third longest poem I have written (not that I've written many poems). Well glad you read it.
I do struggle with writing shorter poems, partially because I'm obsessed with rhyming - writing one line requires another that rhymes with it. But I only write poems whenever I really want to make a point, so I just have to write everything that pops up in my head. If not, it feels incomplete. You'll find that my longer poems are mostly heavy and shorter ones light. So the longer ones are gonna get read by those who really want to read them (without prior knowledge about my poems, just that they mean to seriously read). In this aspect, scaring readers away isn't a big problem, since I only write to make a point known.
Most of my shorter poems, too, are longer than most poems in this server, and yes, that IS quite a big problem that I keep reminding myself to improve if and when I write more of them.

That's for the verbal length. But I hope you don't find any problem with the conciseness. I think all of my poems are very dense in information and structure.

warped mantle
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Wow you have a great talent for writing long poems! I think you would also be great at epic poetry

hollow river
warped mantle