#Kindred Desperation

5 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

grizzled ermine
#

With a glance you set my heart ablaze,
Burnt the remnants of my grace.
Your hands so gentle, a tone so soft,
A soul as intense as the arctic's frost.

And you asked out of the blue “will you be mine?”
— When you knew I possibly couldn't.
And as my lips whispered what we both knew,
My eyes begged for something they shouldn't.

Every glance you send my way,
Every chuckle as rich as gold,
The way you say we'll both work out,
How you reciprocate my fancy tenfold.

Except I know you know better,
And I know this isn't what it seems,
Why would you love my wit and mind,
When I haven't seen half of what you've seen?

Because you’re a desperate kind of love,
The type that leaves a pain in my chest,
A poisonous admiration I can't defend,
Yet one I desire despite the world's behest.

In truth I know I should look away,
From your enchanting soul and this intense ballet,
But no matter where I go, no matter where I hide,
Your words will follow me around,
Until I'm right back by your side.

safe socket
#

Oooh this one is way better

#

Again you could benefit from some different word choices, and for this one I'd love to see some more punctuation to indicate pauses for reading/reciting, your theme of desperate toxic love is relatively complex and very well done, you create great depth of longing and desire, you use pretty good imagery in this one as well, you'll definitely do great things in the future💜