broken hero
#broken hero
maiden quarry
kind cobalt
Love it op. I’d break up the text into multiple stanzas though. I had to reread a couple times to pick out the flow. Very deep and methodical once I did though. Like a stream of consciousness set to a steady beat. Very nice.
maiden quarry
@kind cobalt yeah, it's quite dependent on the rhythm. I'm glad you like it.
quaint fox
Very nice, very nice.
errant comet
i really like the theme of this poem! it's very touching and you perfectly painted the emotions well. ♡
errant comet
Love it op. I’d break up the text into multiple stanzas though. I had to reread ...
i agree with breaking some stanzas for consistent tone as well ♡
maiden quarry
4 times tonight a mis-edit button tap for accidental edit loss. Gotta love it. On suggestions page I offer one to fix this problem. Please upvote it.
calm jasper
I like the sound of it
I suppose I get the message
For some reason I dislike the word “entangled” in that sentence
maiden quarry
@calm jasper yeah, it's more efficient but you may be right.
maiden quarry
broken hero2