Numb.

[simple silo]

My eyes, gathered to be drowsier, rather when, the medication hits through my veins.
throbbing pain i used to feel as the headache comes closer to them...
Dear I?, to hesitate through my compulsion?
The shire of spider webs, buried my funeral in calculations, I was the debt my father paid.
My mind lost it's meaning... Philosophy caused my heart such cave..
leverage of tire imaginations, lunges my heart out.
Paper of this note, it's written in Latin, could I ever cause the shore?.
My throat craves cruising..
like the mystical subconscious.
Redeemed in much many various reasons, I must vary,
like the multiple actions I must pursue, sue such encounter.
Confusion, caries the meaning in the air... feeling heavier or if I stand my ground, much colder.
Could you see my confusion cuddles through my hands, holding my thighs?.
I slept in burden, as the night over fears, Repeating, every limb filled with lye.
The lantern road, Covering of boards, i feel abandoned by my own nightmares...
Much less the daydreams, Fearing them at most.
Express my deep conclusions for the many above?, Carried my heart through sharp tint.
Much lighter when my skin is pale, when as white as the snow, or the Moon or the room of souls...
Bright composure, Fear me closing my heart?, so hold.
Hold", It dares just a number of danger, I hurled my legs up tight to my chest, was i still the kid at most?

[simple silo]

This is literally an amazing piece
The imagery and metaphors used are it.
Talking about how philosophical ideas have made a void in your heart.
This reminds me of my time when I was in depression questioning things.

"Was I still kid at most"
This is deeply touching.

I loved every line of it.
Claps

Ps- bud I hope you get through whatever you are going

[simple silo]

awww, thank you soo much!, means a lot to me!, you're so sweet.

i'm so glad that you liked it, found something relatable in this

[simple silo]

Keep writing pls
I won't be here long
But ping me to your works
From heart I liked it

[simple silo]

Made me connect to it more coz of that

[simple silo]

aw, that's very sweet, i will indeed ping you here!, also i'd love to read your work too!. you write so well!

[simple silo]

i'm glad💕

[simple silo]

beautiful one Aly, showcasing the lingering feeling of melancholy and getting cornered due to haunting burden and possibly bleaking of hope . Knitted some heavy feelings there!

Never loose hope

[simple silo]

aw levon, you're such a great friend, i really really appreciate you!. your poems will always be better though! thank you for your kind words.

ah na pens are unique never better I can never make the same elegant way you do

[simple silo]

nicely said, you're a wise one levon.

[amber hazel]

i like this phrase -

Could you see my confusion cuddles through my hands, holding my thighs?
its like gives a sense of desperation seeking for someoens understanding stuff like wanting the person to know about you just by your touch

also i liked the metaphors

The shire of spider webs, buried my funeral in calculations
the haunting picture of being trapped this one gives and the buried my funeral suggests a sense of getting ||killed|| by your burdens or maybe simply getting overwhelmed by mental burdens

My mind lost its meaning... Philosophy caused my heart such cave
feeling lost with the deep emotional turmoil caused by philosophical contemplation, perfect

there are more but in short i'd say youve really used metaphors nicely

I like the ones taht follow meter but yeah i feel like free verses expresses emotions and feelings lot better and your poem is easily readable, what you tryna express, its picture perfect clear, all your struggles, confusions, mental turmoils, its all understandable. wonderful

If i were to pick my favourite line then umm
this one-

The lantern road, Covering of boards
the sense of desolations, isolation and hopelessness this linegives if something i love sm!! and theimage of road covered in boards is like a path or a way that has been shut off and this is what says that the speaker is lost and directionless
damn nice

uhh but there are a little few adjestments you could make

throbbing pain i use to feel
take a look dummy theres tense mistake, it should be "used"

then

leverage of tire imaginations
this one sounds a lil better
the leverage of tired imaginations.

and maybe rephrase this line a bit for more clearity?

Carried my heart through sharp tint
it is clear okay i get what it means but you could add a little more clarity to it

i loved it way too much, its a beautiful piece :P but duh mistakes and stuff plus theres always some room for improvement so imma rate it like 8.5/10

Also, take care (we still gotta watch another movie!! cant let you give up before thst hahahaha)

[simple silo]

haha omg you literally wrote this alllll... umm😭 firstly, i'd say thank you for the compliments, secondly i love how you gave a whole deep thinking into it, i appreciate it very much!. and also, i could say, i loved it, that you've liked my poem and think there can be improvements, which i'm glad you told me, i just indeed think i write effortlessly, because, in the end, i just write what comes in my mind, not in a sense of caring any meaning behind it, but it just turns into something itself. it's like a diary for me, not something i want to be perfect at yk?.. thank you again!.... [Dw i'll survive for the movie lmfao]