Secret Hideout

[unreal prism]

I've never felt the love of doves
flying way in dozens through droves;
feeling the highs and even the lows
in wind scarred clouds, superimposed.

So delicate, fragile, snowflake in mouth,
dont melt I'd belt so deep in bed;
pulling from feathers with a sleeping beak,
clipped and whipped, the sound of lashing on my back.

Feeling the dread in drowning drought
that runs off the page of the solar systems music sheets,
to the ground that flickers to space,
a river to a birds secret hideout.

[swift stag]

what exactly is the love of doves? i think more exploration into this concept would be beneficial. but i gotta say i loved saying the phrase 'love of doves' out loud. "in wind-scarred clouds, superimposed." what are the wind-scarred clouds superimposing on? but i love the concept of clouds scarred by the wind so much that i can almost feel it myself. in the second stanza, what does "belt so deep in bed" mean? "pulling from feathers with a sleeping beak" needs a bit more clarity because it's hard to parse out what you meant. for the second stanza overall, i am confused but intrigued, and i like the sensory experience you gave us in the first line. for the third stanza, i think more clarity will also benefit it. i feel interested in understanding the metaphors you presented here and seeing how it relates to the overarching message you want to present in this piece. overall the poem is pleasant to say out loud, and there are many intriguing concepts here that i am eager to see you expand. i also like the way you separated the stanzas. well done. thank you for writing and sharing this piece!

[unreal prism]

Love of doves would be others in relationships, the piece was basicaly about how it feels to be alone and never have gotten to experience a long term relationship. Superimposed was used for the the doves making love and for the the wind scarred clouds not being able to be seen fully because I havn't experienced for ups and downs of a relationship. Belt deep in bed is yelling or 'singing' in bed alone while pulling feathers has to do with stress (how birds pull feathers when they're stressed) because others expect me to be in a relationship too.