A message from the Land -Hydrae

[lime dock]

@waxen belfry

@lyric pilot

@chilly lion

@quartz hound

@fleet python

@abstract onyx

@vernal sentinel

@torpid edge

[abstract onyx]

Wow I almost thought it was the start of the song “All by myself” haha form the first phase. Anyways, what a beautiful message about nature and climate change. I really loved 🥰 how you expressed it from nature’s or even earth’s perspective and humanising itself by incorporating vivid imagery and emotions! Well done ✅

[lime dock]

Thank u I really appreciate the feedback

[lime dock]

@analog mirage @fleet python

[fleet python]

God, what a reflective poem...
very deep congratulations

[lime dock]

Thanks any improvements?

[fleet python]

I cant say anything about this

[lime dock]

Ok (that's a big compliment coming from u ) thanks again Rico

[torpid orbit]

*Ok (that's a big

compliment coming from u )

thanks again Rico*

- Hydrae

[fleet python]

Thanks hydraee

[torpid edge]

Great concept, really deep and profound, then the vocabulary, it's good, effective and hard (in a good sense) also I'm impressed that I can see improvement as compared to the last poem, now to get started, let's start with rhyme, it's absent which adds texture (sensory effect) to the poem and makes it more heartfelt, tho I'd recommend add some of them, then comes metaphors and imageries, absolute perfection, not overused, not neglected, just on the perfect spot, then comes the structure, I'm a bit concerned about that part as yk, an inconsistent structure usually throws off readers, aside from that I can also see improvement in first stanza, revise the poem again and it should be good to go, overall an 8.5/10, thanks

[quartz hound]

wow really good, i like the repetition with offspring

and word choice is immaculate

[lime dock]

Ahh thank u so much vindi.... I appreciate that. Any places to improve?

[quartz hound]

maybe work on the structure more

like the format

[lime dock]

Ahh I see will look into it (was tryna make it look cluttered to show how the land has changed from the once normal peaceful being to now a being who has been violated and destroyed )

[quartz hound]

oh I see now its makes more sense to me visually in that way

[lime dock]

Thank God I thought I hadn't made it evident enough

[hollow wren]

the poem in itself is very deep and meaningful, you've perfectly pictured the ruin of the environment and how it gets affected. the repetition of the word offspring adds depth and a different kind of ache. the lines are perfect, the poem as awhole is my fav. the structure could use a little work but other than that its great. everything is top notch.

[lime dock]

Thank you i appreciate the feedback... and i will look into the structure

[lime dock]

@unborn iron

[lyric pilot]

Your poem masterfully personifies nature, depicting its transformation from revered entity to exploited resource. Through vivid imagery and poignant language, it highlights the destructive impact of human greed and the urgent need for environmental conservation. The progression from purity to degradation is skillfully portrayed, delivering a powerful message about the consequences of our actions. Your call to action at the end resonates strongly, urging readers to recognize their responsibility in preserving the Earth. Overall, it's a poignant and thought-provoking piece that inspires reflection and action.

Sorry for the delay

Had lot of stuff going on and lots pf rejections🤣

[lime dock]

Thank you I appreciate the detailed review a lot 🙏

[lime dock]

It's fine I understand

[lime dock]

@old path here have a look

Ahh thanks will look into it. And I appreciate the detailed review. U might like my other poem than #1221179594753966140

Ahh yes ... I suck at them

Okie 🙏

[lime dock]

@gaunt lichen

[gaunt lichen]

This is honestly such a fantastic poem

I LOVE the words you used

And how you personified the earth

The message is really intriguing, it's not easy to find poems about topics like this one

And I love how you bring up your "siblings"

It's such a fascinating way to go about it

You did a phenomenal job, you should be proud of this!! 😄

[lime dock]

Thank you I appreciate it ❤️

[lime dock]

I wrote it for a contest at my school... and I still lost so yeah lol

[torpid orbit]

*I wrote it for a

contest at my school... and I

still lost so yeah lol*

- Hydrae

[gaunt lichen]

That's honestly surprising

It was a really good poem

Can I show you one or two of mine?

You're thoughtful, so I think your feedback would be especially amazing to hear

[lime dock]

Ohh sure

[lime dock]

@muted coral

[lime dock]

@undone hollow @grave parrot

[grave parrot]

Omgg I love this one!! Its really good!!

[undone hollow]

"Plastic, the one cherished by humans now
Incapacitated us siblings one by one
Dragging me to my demise
Present in every pore of me, a never degrading presence" Applause worthy!!!

[lime dock]

Thank you❤️

[lime dock]

Thank you ✨️ I appreciate it

[lime dock]

@languid imp

Here

[languid imp]

Thats legit so beautiful and sad tbh

[lime dock]

Thank you

[lime dock]

@limber glen

[limber glen]

this one resonates with me

[lime dock]

A message from the Land -Hydrae

[lime dock]

@thorn plover

[willow flare]

@stable condor is now following @lime dock.

[stable condor]

this is what i imagine

when i read ts

[lime dock]

Wow looks beautiful

[lime dock]

@wooden hornet

Here

[wooden hornet]

hydrae can I put this on a magazine?

[lime dock]

Hmm yeah sure why not 😌

[wooden hornet]

So like should I put yer name or your pen name

[lime dock]

You can put in my real name I'll dm you wait