#our dance

25 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

late pulsar
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our dance

When I close my eyes,
all I can see is us dancing to the sound of our own music,
you teaching me how to use the steps and me just appreciating your incredible delicate way of dancing,
looking at the sparkle in your eyes,
dreaming of them mistaking them for beautiful crystals in a dark coal mine,
diving into that ocean of liquid love,
swimming on it, drowning on it,
on that night of many terrors,
where your eyes were full of tears,
when you still hadn't touched me still...
take me to that night that never happened,
all I want is to dance our dance but only by your side,
with your beautiful Spanish eyes,
beautiful steps my heart boils in love in a static created by myself...
I'm just a man and I want the world in my hands,
this cruel illusion that my mind created of us will never happen because now
all I have left is to be haunted by your ghost in a non-existent dance of the agony of having to open my eyes again.

fresh echo
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This poem makes a very beautiful image. It could benefit from having shorter sentences as they drag on a bit, for better clarity. However, if that is intentional then dont touch it as its unique.

late pulsar
rugged trellis
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wow

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this is really good , alot of imagery ! nice poetry overall

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i can tell u took time writing this

late pulsar
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You can say yes, it was difficult because it represents some people in my life who will be very difficult for me to meet again.

rugged trellis
late pulsar
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Yeah

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I created beautiful images in my mind only to destroy them at the end

small crane
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This poem is very beautiful, you can feel the raw heartbreak in the recollections of imagery

late pulsar
hallow flax
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Imagery is damn good, it's a bittersweet poem. Nice! I had a good time reading it!

late pulsar
wise peak
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I love the language. I like the specific words that yoy use, it feels like you put thought into the words that you chose. They feel intentional (in a good way)

late pulsar
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ty man!

wise peak
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I like that! I rlly like this site called onelook thesaurus

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it's super nice because you can put in a phrase and it will give you a word that has a similar meaning

late pulsar
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ty for tips haha

wise peak
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Np! always happy to help

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I'd love to read more of your work, feel free to ping me for feedback in the future

late pulsar
late pulsar