Some real profound notions tucked in there rhur. Definitely the observations of a loner, and after all isnt that what poets are ;)
My critique would definitely be the use of words like "something, nothing, and everything". They come across as too vague or general. I'd suggest something like "there's an emptiness about the objects we see, for that is all they are/for they cant become more/..." also the "it is to have nothing and to make nothing of something" stanza is really confusing for the same reasons.
Also maybe ask yourself- if something is beautiful, is it really only beautiful? Consider everything in nature that's beautiful but also lethal, or consider the beautiful woman you met once who impressed you with her knowledge of another language, or consider the beautiful heavens- is their only purpose to be beautiful?
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bleak stirrup
light hingeBOT
Some real profound notions tucked in there rhur. Definitely the observations of ...
Wonderful! @bleak stirrup has just pregressed to level 1!
tulip flare
weekly poetry 17 (critiques appreciated Wrote this thinking about infinity and the limits of love)