4/10
Not my style
#Marker.
pure willow
restive cobalt
doesnt have to be :) ty
olive bay
I like the use of images, locusts, and the inability to release the pen until the fight is resolved; my only critique is that the meter on some lines feels like it skips a beat, which can throw off reading flow
restive cobalt
I like the use of images, locusts, and the inability to release the pen until th...
thanks, this is my first time writing a poem like this -- like short.
i mostly never write poetry this way
i just wanted to switch up a bit.
and see what people would think of it
sharp current
I like this almost rise in suspense in the first two lines which is actuated by the rhyme.
The only critique I have is in the 4th line - the idea of demons trapped inside... is quite common - you could perhaps further expand on the saying. This can relate back to the "overthinking" because the exaggeration of the demons can be seen as this.
I like the idea of a locusts swarm, maybe an intentional reference to Exodus and the swarm of locusts.
The way you word your poem is quite unique and makes it fun to read
The rhyme is well put but seems abit forced
restive cobalt
thank you