💣tarkov-released

[mortal trench]

they already did with the posters kek

[wintry ridge]

like that hawaiian shirt and pants are gonna be normal on a guy and then suddently a crop top and short shorts on the woman pmc

bsg cant resist milking retarded gooners for money

[mortal trench]

why the fuck did they even add that
pmcs in the game, you get spotted you die
bright ass hawaiian shirt

[wintry ridge]

drip

[fleet carbon]

Funny

I much prefer that to an altyn compatible earbud thank you

[short cove]

Transphobia

[fleet carbon]

EoD and Unheard should've only been PVE and cosmetics

[fast garden]

https://tenor.com/view/bold-strategy-dodgeball-cotton-strategy-tactics-gif-4957668

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/ishowspeed-meme-trying-not-to-laugh-laugh-homeless-gif-9458928528704746136

are you even trying?

https://tenor.com/view/ishowspeed-meme-trying-not-to-laugh-laugh-homeless-gif-9458928528704746136

[ancient marsh]

@compact knoll

[mortal trench]

i agree

[ancient marsh]

my brother in dms

[fleet carbon]

You know what at this point they should actually add the special Unheard flare but instead of calling in a pmc it calls a player scav

[ancient marsh]

@stark torrent @flat breach

[wintry ridge]

artem you bought unheard edition, stop being more retarded than usual

[mortal trench]

you get two really good guns for having unheard

[compact knoll]

напиши ему @ancient marsh

[compact knoll]

i havent

[wintry ridge]

the barrels taste really good

[compact knoll]

actual slander

[wintry ridge]

you should try em, maybe see how snappy the trigger is too

[ancient marsh]

you need the tigz R6 Siege setup image

[mortal trench]

one of them can merc guys from across half the map of ground zero and others wont even have the chance to shoot you because they dont have scopes

[wintry ridge]

@ancient marsh they didnt even change the skill descriptions LMFAO

[fast garden]

https://tenor.com/view/speed-try-not-to-laugh-speed-dont-laugh-gif-9393628858940137350

[compact knoll]

i dont think its even out yet

is it

[fleet carbon]

Gotta love all the streamers tryna get in too and trying so hard to hold back any criticism beacuse their livelihood depends on it

[compact knoll]

@ancient marsh друг говорит, что у него через 2 часа выключат свет, и у него мгновенно зависает стрим и его кикает

[mortal trench]

gotta ask the shills that bought the game on steam

[wintry ridge]

[fleet carbon]

Steam players aren't gonna get in

[compact knoll]

pretty sure it launched the luancher anyway

[fleet carbon]

I'm 90% sure Steam opens up the BSG launcher anyway

[mortal trench]

oh god i hope so
that would be too fucking funny

[fleet carbon]

You're literally just paying to have the game show up on your profile and have the steam overlay ingame

[mortal trench]

ladies and gentleman we got a different error

[viral egret]

i got error: 0

[fleet carbon]

Yeah I got it too just now

[mortal trench]

servers are warming up then

they block traffic right now
but the gateway is reachable

[fleet carbon]

Imagine Nikita opens up stream again and just says "Whoops guys 24 hours maintenance again"

[daring grove]

I still haven’t

[viral egret]

he'll get swatted

[soft coral]

https://tenor.com/view/michael-jackson-comendo-picoca-gif-9669437860846841235

[viral egret]

we all are and have been waiting for 1.0

[soft coral]

good show

[mortal trench]

glad to entertain

[stark torrent]

Streamers crying that we only have 6 prestiges instead of 10 on release

Neighbour , i am at prestige 2

[mortal trench]

the plot thickens

[stark torrent]

Fuck off

[fast garden]

oh nice they added an extra 2

[mortal trench]

you guys prestiged? lol

[fleet carbon]

I skipped prestige and just bought the akula dagger

[ancient marsh]

@stark torrent tigz looking like a gang member in prison

[stark torrent]

they prob will add more in the summer or whevenver the next wipe is

[viral egret]

kys

[stark torrent]

[soft coral]

mf said task was cancelled

[mortal trench]

[soft coral]

what even

[viral egret]

tis the third time

it cancels the task

[fleet carbon]

1 slot melee, useful for when you find a taiga or red rebel so you can stash the buttplug back into your container easily

[soft coral]

https://tenor.com/view/michael-jackson-comendo-picoca-gif-9669437860846841235

absolute fucking cinema

[soft coral]

watching GTA SA speedrun while periodically checking

[fast garden]

different drops

[fleet carbon]

https://tenor.com/view/cj-explosion-nuke-gta-san-andreas-san-andreas-gif-17178689676196145227

[fast garden]

HOLY FUCK PESTILYS DROPS

look at the subs dude

money farm

[mortal trench]

can you reliable skip the rc helicopter mission?

[fast garden]

hype train went from 30 to 43 and froze

[short cove]

Shadow wizard money gang

[fast garden]

drops are live

[viral egret]

kys

[fast garden]

and theres a weird armband

[viral egret]

[fleet carbon]

Tf do you mean drops are live

when mfs can't even get into the game

[stark torrent]

chill or you get locked out for 8 hours

or mroe

[mortal trench]

theres no point in even klicking play until we can even download the launcher update

[stark torrent]

yeah keeping pc open ggs

[fast garden]

over 4k subs

[soft coral]

RC heli mission is zero in GTA SA

that one isn't even done

in a SA speedrun

Zero missions are optional actually

[mortal trench]

its the only bad thing i remember about the few hrs i played gta sa

[soft coral]

that heli missions is ez

[mortal trench]

as a child it was fucking not

[viral egret]

with those drops i mightg aswell just

[soft coral]

yeah as a child sure

[mortal trench]

i was like 10 or smth

[fast garden]

i have never seen this amount of subs ever

[soft coral]

idk I did all the missions on phone and didn't have issues

theyre piss easy

[fast garden]

literally lvl 30 hype train to lvl 58 in 5 minutes

[stark torrent]

chill cause u just got reported for this

[soft coral]

[compact knoll]

jesus christ

[fleet carbon]

I'm gonna know who to point and laugh at when I see a sword melee

[compact knoll]

its not that deep

[soft coral]

nah nah I wont say anything

who is this retard

[wintry ridge]

i assumed they would

theyve been on like

2 every wipe since prestieges were added

[fleet carbon]

Inb4 the drops give you 5 moonshines 2 rocket launchers and 1 zabralo and altyn on day 1 of wipe

[fast garden]

tbh i expected a fiew more

[wintry ridge]

same

maybe theyll do some later this year

dont need to wipe to add new ones

or next year

[foggy jay]

works great!!!!

[viral egret]

lmfaooo

[fast garden]

welcome to the club

[mortal trench]

groks here too

[foggy jay]

8 years guys

[viral egret]

i cant even get in

[mortal trench]

omegalul

[viral egret]

it just kicks me out

[wintry ridge]

@fast garden lmfao the stream chat is still just ru boykisser spammed by some femboy

[fast garden]

im not even as far as you guys lmao

[fleet carbon]

If you buy 50 twitch subs the pearly servers will open up in your presence

[mortal trench]

honestly. why did we even think it will be different this time around

[wintry ridge]

im on error 213, hell yeah

im far in

[keen sparrow]

yup

[foggy jay]

Keep clicking, it will heal the servers

[keen sparrow]

This is just like when Endwalker dropped for FF14

[fast garden]

https://tenor.com/view/speed-try-not-to-laugh-speed-dont-laugh-gif-9393628858940137350

[foggy jay]

see this? It's a good sign

[keen sparrow]

and your server queue was like.. 214,000

[mortal trench]

bsg just tweeted "lets go"

PRESS THE BUTTON GUYS

[short cove]

Time to ge5 a twitch drop miner in 7 hours

[fleet carbon]

Big ass server queue is still better than literally no one even being able to download the update itself

[stark torrent]

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[mortal trench]

make sure you mute the tab not the stream entirely

[foggy jay]

[stark torrent]

what a piece of shit game

[mortal trench]

and video to 144p

[foggy jay]

why no preloading though

[mortal trench]

steam had it xD

[stark torrent]

i think steam has it tho

[wintry ridge]

servers cant handle it /s

[stark torrent]

steam can play it

[mortal trench]

"play" yeah

[viral egret]

ok bro

[foggy jay]

steam can launch the launcher and arrive here

[compact knoll]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/274965772055609344/1406082152545783818/crazy-cat.gif

[stark torrent]

LET ME PATCHA

[fast garden]

man

[flat breach]

Update lil bro

[fast garden]

i dont even get that far

americans filtered

[compact knoll]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/920016996752564286/1436406412950634727/togif.gif

[foggy jay]

trying one last time then I go eat

[wintry ridge]

sucks to suck

[mortal trench]

im at gateway timeout again ffs

[fast garden]

at least another hour of this

likely more

[wintry ridge]

yummers

[fleet carbon]

Cartoonish running slip and fall sound effects

[native crypt]

ATP just go back to sleep thee

[mortal trench]

https://tenor.com/view/roadrunnerandcoyote-looney-tunes-gif-5063304

[stark torrent]

OUSSKHAAAAAAAAAAAAA

THE 9200 HOURS GAVE ME VIP QUEUE

[fleet carbon]

Legitimately woke up at 6 am for this

[mortal trench]

youve got to be jocking

[fleet carbon]

what was I even thinking

[mortal trench]

sucked off nikita personally

[compact knoll]

IM UPDATING IT

IM UPDATING

[flat breach]

The lion does not spit

[compact knoll]

IM UPDATING ALL OVER

[mortal trench]

do i read that right? 19gb update?

[soft coral]

cinema

[mortal trench]

thats not much

[stark torrent]

19gb yeah it will take us 1 hour

[compact knoll]

4mbs for me

gg man

why

i downloaded 12mb with steam

[stark torrent]

ok so BSG drama already

with the drops

[mortal trench]

yeah

so many people wasted money for stuff they dont get lol

[fleet carbon]

I love happy endings

[fast garden]

people are stupid for not waiting to see

imo

[fleet carbon]

Still getting auth error

it's tarkover

[mortal trench]

its like those idiots spamming !drops

[flat breach]

There's only so much bandwidth you can squeeze out of one soggy biscuit of a server
Small indie dev

[fast garden]

any americans able to get update

[compact knoll]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/274965772055609344/1406082152545783818/crazy-cat.gif

[fast garden]

or no

[fleet carbon]

Even when you manage to download the update

[fast garden]

this is so peak

[fleet carbon]

Prepare for ingame raids to be slideshows

[mortal trench]

couldve rented server capacity for a week so that launch goes smooth but oh no

[compact knoll]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/931627162124050442/1439191683538489424/VID_20251113_000612_327.mp4?ex=69199f34&is=69184db4&hm=6801a1ac4238675b6b60476fcac17028242c241fe7e10e86128af2738b24e381&

[fleet carbon]

and more teleporting than endermen in rain

[compact knoll]

iedy just said 6-7

[hearty oar]

interesting when people before 1.0 said the game is dead but when 1.0 come out, they actually choke it already

[keen sparrow]

There is a silver lining here

[ancient marsh]

bsg having a ukranian bias is so crazy

[compact knoll]

sleeper activation

[ancient marsh]

do i need to rest pc or what

[stark torrent]

2x more than hardcore wipe

[mortal trench]

im seething rn

[stark torrent]

ggs we won guys

[keen sparrow]

[cyan garnet]

keep getting an error

kms

[bronze pine]

i been getting that blank launcher

[fast garden]

rex updating for 1.0 as if he actually wants to play

[compact knoll]

why do you have a politcal candidate as your background

[fleet carbon]

They already said there won't be any

gotta figure it out ourselves

[keen sparrow]

Candidate?

[compact knoll]

i have broken

[compact knoll]

i have a broken baro background

[keen sparrow]

Bro she's the Director of National Intelligence

[compact knoll]

my pc bluescreened and it broke half of it

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/ishowspeed-meme-trying-not-to-laugh-laugh-homeless-gif-9458928528704746136

[ancient marsh]

CAUGHT

[compact knoll]

i actually bought the game

[stark torrent]

meanwhile Tigz launcher completely blacked out

[ancient marsh]

WHITE SUPREMACIST WITH BLACK GF

CAUGHT

[compact knoll]

i havent bough that one

[fleet carbon]

Brother she looks like Kamala Harris but less addicted to fent

[ancient marsh]

[flat breach]

Man what the fuck

[fast garden]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/1215019069821165618/1223782241293959418/whacky.gif

[keen sparrow]

who are you again?

[ancient marsh]

what

[compact knoll]

thats not even racist

[ancient marsh]

that's like the funniest hypocrisy moment

that's not even racist either

[fast garden]

sniper should have privated the channel man

[flat breach]

Outta context looks like you're having a schizo moment

[ancient marsh]

if you make fun of the pro-family values politician for getting caught at a gei orgy, are you being homophobic? no

[fleet carbon]

Your father and I am very disappointed in you

[ancient marsh]

artem was caught at a gei orgy rrn

[compact knoll]

@glacial haven we need a VIP tarkov channel for the real fellas

[keen sparrow]

i'm waiting for the retardation to cool down, i have good news but retards going to retard

[compact knoll]

xalridestein island

[native crypt]

At this rate take a nap then it might be up

[ancient marsh]

what happens on xal island?

[glacial haven]

so the most ruleless and toxic channel on the server

[compact knoll]

yep

[fleet carbon]

Here's the wipe day 1 strategy

[fast garden]

spt is doomed lmao

[stark torrent]

Pestily got 15k gifted subs in the first 10 minutes and now he says he looks like the worlds biggest scammer

Casue BSG fucked upo teh drops

[flat breach]

So just a honeypot channel

[keen sparrow]

possibly

[fleet carbon]

take nap, wait until game is downloadable, wait until the sacrificial lambs lose all their gear on lagged out raids bc of disconnects and profit

[ancient marsh]

@compact knoll surely you bought all those games that have the .exe a blank icon

surely steam doesn't delete the icon

[compact knoll]

lets see

which one do i ahve

[ancient marsh]

dl2

mgs5

[compact knoll]

sid 6

dispatch

hunt peak rv

[ancient marsh]

bro

[ancient marsh]

why am i listening to dr phil

[compact knoll]

arma 3

gates of hell

[ancient marsh]

screaming about how good tigz dick is

[stark torrent]

Crazy donation i am laughing for 3 mins

[ancient marsh]

[compact knoll]

mowas 2

[stark torrent]

come chat xal

[ancient marsh]

bro legit i ignored it for like 10 mins

10 secs

[compact knoll]

baro ck3

thats it

[mortal trench]

which faction you going for this wipe btw guys?

[native crypt]

Bear

[fleet carbon]

Bear as always

[mortal trench]

theres the army guys now that are friendly to bear right

[native crypt]

Maybe

[fleet carbon]

already tried USEC 2 wipes ago and going back now would be a betrayal

[mortal trench]

i mean its basically good vs bad

usec supports terragroup

[fleet carbon]

Cosmetics, voice, Lighthouse has AIs that spot you at 500m and laser you down if you're a bear

[keen sparrow]

@fast garden @stark torrent @soft coral @cyan garnet @short cove @compact knoll

[fleet carbon]

There's the chance that the new black division faction is gonna be friendlier to bear or that's what the rumors say but it wouldn't make a lick of sense lorewise

[mortal trench]

no way they made spt folks harder to work

[soft coral]

best part is nikita on stream said they did something with servers blah blah theyre reinforced
yet another lie

[keen sparrow]

So when all the nerds try to open the game up to copy it and make SPT, instead of seeing code they understand, it's all gonna be 100111011010010010001101010100101101010100110101010110001110010101

[soft coral]

spt
we sleep

[wintry ridge]

THEYRE STILL DONATING LMFAO

[fast garden]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dd3MSNfRZ68 if you guys hadnt seen it yet

[mortal trench]

no not the blac div
army guys from harbor are talked about to be friendly to bear because they are russ army

[keen sparrow]

yeah reinforced against anyone using the product they paid for

[wintry ridge]

hi theeen

lets play tarkov

[fast garden]

https://tenor.com/view/halo-combat-evolved-halo-ce-not-going-to-happen-two-betrayals-master-chief-gif-27094749

[fleet carbon]

Didn't Nikita say there'd be 2 bad endings?

Wouldn't be surprised if they're locked behind PMC faction

[keen sparrow]

The good ending is when you end up ankle deep in Therapist's guts

[ancient marsh]

what am i looking at

[grand eagle]

С релизом

https://cdn.discordapp.com/emojis/1353090787377811529.webp?size=48&quality=lossless&name=joeAngel

[ancient marsh]

didnt see the cocks

[mortal trench]

aaaaand its gone

[ancient marsh]

i formally apologize

[stark torrent]

he is truly straight

[fleet carbon]

Well back to error codes instead of a blank launcher

That's something

Right?

[ancient marsh]

[grand eagle]

[mortal trench]

@stark torrent your download finished? because launcher has a bunch of new issues now xD

[stark torrent]

3gb left

[wintry ridge]

this shit wont fuckin open raaah

[stark torrent]

https://tenor.com/view/homer-suicide-sobbing-simpsons-gif-11098229

[fleet carbon]

This was all calculated so Grok doesn't get distracted on anything non gamma related

[mortal trench]

im only looking at the 2 stooges with nothing happening

[fleet carbon]

Thank you Nikita

[mortal trench]

ah

error code

refreshing

[fleet carbon]

It's tarkover

an hour went by

they already lost the cod playerbase

Billions must buy fortnite ops 7

[stark torrent]

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MIXED REVIEWS

AHAHAHAHAH

[frosty wigeon]

wait wut

[fleet carbon]

Lmao

[mortal trench]

cod playerbase has a attention span of 5secs

[keen sparrow]

it has already begun

[wintry ridge]

lets see what the review bombers are saying

[mortal trench]

you saw the new "endboss" of the cod7 campaign xD

[frosty wigeon]

wut begun?

[ancient marsh]

surely its review bombing and unethical if you couldnt review the game until steam release

[ancient marsh]

and you put like 3k hours into it

[brave aspen]

so what the paid drops are broken and the game won’t launch?????

[fleet carbon]

It says no reviews for me still

[frosty wigeon]

hahaha lmao

[keen sparrow]

how you gonna ask me a question and then immediately go D N D

[frosty wigeon]

i dont know DND

[keen sparrow]

[frosty wigeon]

im a newbie on tarkov
i just bought the game

[wintry ridge]

postitive and negative reviews that are just shitposts with no substance shouldnt be counted towards the actual ratio on steam

imma be real

[ancient marsh]

refund while you can

[ancient marsh]

kill yourself

[frosty wigeon]

altho i have some knowledge on it coz of videos

[keen sparrow]

Do Not Disturb. i watched it change as i was checking your roles, lol

[wintry ridge]

if your negative review for rimworld is just "HAHA WARCRIMES" you should kill yourself

[keen sparrow]

THIS has begun

[wintry ridge]

positive too

[frosty wigeon]

i didnt changed it lol

[keen sparrow]

Frota likes Rimworld

[wintry ridge]

or these copypastas

[wintry ridge]

these are purely subjective with no actual information to base a purchase off

[ancient marsh]

tigz looking like jelly roll

[ancient marsh]

if it has mixed theres enough people thinking its a bad game

[keen sparrow]

you know that guy smells like aftershave and taco meat

[wintry ridge]

yeah theres probably a couple actual negative reviews with substance but then you get like, timmies first review that he typed on his mom's pc

[fleet carbon]

I just read the review of a guy claiming to have been life threatened by Nikita

what

[keen sparrow]

[ancient marsh]

massive cope

like INSANE cope

that most reviews arent from players who played the game for 3k hours

and its just timmies

[frosty wigeon]

tiny timmies that have big egos?

[fleet carbon]

Did Nikita send Bear after this guy?

[wintry ridge]

he got copyright struck after trying to leak ways to glitch into pve players games and kill them

[keen sparrow]

WTT

[ancient marsh]

yeah they are not invested enough to buy the game to negative react
but players who played the game for years and have pent-up frustration? for sure

[keen sparrow]

Then you get reviews like this

[wintry ridge]

xalrider you fat moron

[stark torrent]

ivans review

[ancient marsh]

misread is as "Kirk"

[fast garden]

[compact knoll]

ZOOTOPIA RABBIT KIRK

https://tenor.com/view/pain-screaming-akira-anime-jenochupapica-gif-10990110972560119364

[white cloak]

is the launcher still down for you guys

[wintry ridge]

this mf's delta force review is pure copium lol

[compact knoll]

im downloading already

iedy finished downloading

[wintry ridge]

same with gray zone

[ancient marsh]

post them

[mortal trench]

chat says gigabeef is in game

[hearty oar]

so it is start

he play local match

not pvp

[fleet carbon]

What

[compact knoll]

you wouldnt get it

[soft coral]

good reivew honestly

[wintry ridge]

rating both off potential and then not changing after another 400 hours of gameplay

[pliant thorn]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/470851943565230082/1439226466331131955/image.png?ex=6919bf99&is=69186e19&hm=afd036356e953672c6c5d968b6a5f6e7acf06827bd8126a0a9570beb4ceeb241&

[wintry ridge]

[wintry ridge]

delta force is actually slop now

[ancient marsh]

[ancient marsh]

https://tenor.com/view/ishowspeed-meme-trying-not-to-laugh-laugh-homeless-gif-9458928528704746136

[keen sparrow]

just canceled huh?

[stark torrent]

what is this review man

[hearty oar]

and i still waiting

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/ishowspeed-meme-trying-not-to-laugh-laugh-homeless-gif-9458928528704746136

[keen sparrow]

not even a 302 or a timeout

[fleet carbon]

I'm still getting the blank launcher

[flat breach]

[wintry ridge]

[mortal trench]

same here

[stark torrent]

1050 in 2025

almost 2026

[ancient marsh]

its genuinely okay

[fleet carbon]

I have exactly that too

Me when poor people exist

[compact knoll]

gg

youre not playing that

[ancient marsh]

it is like 80% of tarkov's quality but it respects your time much much more

[stark torrent]

shill

[calm crest]

cant even lmao

[fleet carbon]

More like 60%

[ancient marsh]

nah

[fleet carbon]

I've put in about 200 hours in the game

Didn't play much after the tv station update hit cause I had already gotten tarkov

Game is too arcadey so it's not that comparable to Tarkov as you might think

[wintry ridge]

like this should just be discarded as a review

this aint a review its just a shitpost

[fleet carbon]

Still better pricing given it's 0 dabloons

[foggy jay]

No Tarkov today guys

[ancient marsh]

"too arcadey" is personal preference

[ancient marsh]

genuinely

[foggy jay]

Honestly that’s not a lot

[calm crest]

BSG's servers never dissapoint to dissapoint

[compact knoll]

im tarkoving today

[mortal trench]

pestilys chat says "vpn to germany can log into the launcher"
they lying, CAUSE I AS SURE CANT

[foggy jay]

Biggest moment of Nikita’s life btw

[ancient marsh]

iedy alt

[compact knoll]

you cant stop me

its already done downloading

[fleet carbon]

Gotta be patient with the indie company

[calm crest]

yeah im gonna come back in a few hours

[viral egret]

PLEAASSEE LET ME IN BSG

its the 40th attempt

[soft coral]

so its all going downhill huh

[gritty python]

we'll be waiting for a while

[compact knoll]

unpacking game files

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/274965772055609344/1406082152545783818/crazy-cat.gif

[soft coral]

you mfs really thought you'll be able to play the moment it launches?
holy delusions

@fast garden another penny in the jar sir

[ancient marsh]

perma ban artem for spoiling

[fast garden]

im not that retarded

[calm crest]

release the game on steam
do a big 1.0 launch
prepare the infrastructure for the 100% expected???
nah fuck that

[mortal trench]

patch 3.10 worked good in that regard

[soft coral]

youre an exception thee

[gritty python]

idk i can't remember a patch that was smooth day 1

[compact knoll]

honestly

its not that bad

it was worse before

[mortal trench]

arc xD

[soft coral]

streets performance wipe was worse tbh like 3 and a half people could play the map

[white cloak]

20 fps my beloved

[ancient marsh]

there's landmines in the tutorial

[soft coral]

just liek gamma

[ancient marsh]

and you have to fight scavs

[gritty python]

powerpoint presentation of tarkov

[ancient marsh]

absolute triple layered diamond encrusted filtering system

[gritty python]

no

[wanton bridge]

stfu dont spoil me

[calm crest]

batman dies in the tutorial

[keen sparrow]

1.0 is IL2CPP apparently

[gritty python]

nah i give spt devs the rest of today

they'll be in

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/joe-emotiguy-emotiguy-butt-shake-emoji-butt-shake-joe-butt-shake-gif-14427695574209448709

[keen sparrow]

maybe not killed, but machine code is... noone works in machine code, let's just say that

[compact knoll]

hardcore smile

[gritty python]

when you get to speaking clanker, it's dark hours

[wintry ridge]

@compact knoll i just saw a true asf post

[foggy jay]

Arc raiders was fine 10hz tick rate though

[wintry ridge]

ground zero bank claymore is gonna claim so many timmies

[wintry ridge]

they have to have a tracker for thta thing

[gritty python]

i cannot wait to spend my first like 20 raids watching people kill themselves on map objects

[wintry ridge]

please i beg bsg

[frosty wigeon]

i was one of them ngl

[hard heart]

Seems to be working on my end.

[wintry ridge]

i gotta know how many new steam players are gonna get fucking nuked

[gritty python]

https://tenor.com/view/goku-prowler-goku-goku-mad-goku-dbs-dbs-gif-11120329515669448575

or the pmc camp mines on woods

[gritty python]

LMAO

I JUST GOT A CLOUDFLARE WAITINGROOM THING FOR BSG

nah the website cooked, the launcher cooked

[wanton bridge]

CAN EVEN LOG INTO LAUCHER

[stark torrent]

@fast garden

https://media.tenor.com/2H6q6yF9u2AAAAAj/pepe-fridge.gif

[soft coral]

this is complete chaos I love it

what a fucking joke

[gritty python]

idk i got exactly what i expected personally

[stark torrent]

come in chat ivan

[soft coral]

not happening

watching a gta sa speedrun

to chill

[hard heart]

Yep, we workin!

[gritty python]

what run?

[soft coral]

joshimuz

[ancient marsh]

[gritty python]

pog

[ancient marsh]

[wintry ridge]

https://tenor.com/view/rigby-cat-cat-rigby-gif-9770631437958675768

[glacial haven]

immediately insulted

[gritty python]

https://tenor.com/view/cooked-dog-cooked-dog-meme-bro-is-finished-finished-cooked-gif-14138319004290811594

[stark torrent]

[wintry ridge]

@stark torrent oh shit right the tutorial is just the uhh

collapsed ground zero from the trailer

[mortal trench]

blatant lie

[keen sparrow]

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/pain-screaming-akira-anime-jenochupapica-gif-10990110972560119364

[stark torrent]

Stop rex

[daring grove]

[compact knoll]

whats next

motorboat

[fast garden]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/1215019069821165618/1223782241293959418/whacky.gif

[keen sparrow]

I can't help how my dick heart feels

[gritty python]

[glacial haven]

I am going to have nightmares

[fast garden]

https://tenor.com/view/funny-gif-9791600234365446047

[gritty python]

why is she lightskin staring the camera

[keen sparrow]

YOOOO

[compact knoll]

camera?

[keen sparrow]

WHEN WE DICKIN DOWN THERAPIST

[stark torrent]

oh my god what the fuck

[compact knoll]

have you heard of eye contact lil bro?

[keen sparrow]

[gritty python]

last i checked ur eyes arent on ur fuckin chest but oki

[soft coral]

Young man I require your ass

[ancient marsh]

ggs

[soft coral]

damn

these models look ass bro

[gritty python]

i need jaeger to stop cancelling the task to open the launcher

[soft coral]

game in 2025 btw

[gritty python]

yeah that therapist model was fucking rough

[wintry ridge]

its here

hell yeah

[gritty python]

https://tenor.com/view/взгляд-2000-ярдов-война-war-soldier-gif-3632617944134077161

[stark torrent]

https://tenor.com/view/chad-poggers-gigachad-lul-gif-25498722

[wintry ridge]

would

[gritty python]

NO NOT THE COPY PASTE DIALOGUE

SAY IT ISNT SO

🙏

[fleet carbon]

Are these images real

These mfs are skinwalkers

[glacial haven]

We are very lucky that there is no copy button, Iedy would ping the entirety of this discord server again

[fleet carbon]

These are not the traders these are alternates what the fuck

[gritty python]

mandela catelogue: episode tarkov

[glacial haven]

They do not look very good, no, I honestly expected actual cutscenes

Not 3d renders

[gritty python]

nah i knew it'd be this

they just copy pasted the modeling for LK

rewrote the dialogue ui

[glacial haven]

But it's not bad either, it's just middle of the road, I expected actual real life cutscenes

[fast garden]

i think there still will be

[fleet carbon]

It's fine that they're cutscenes

what isn't is that these mfs look like they were designed by someone who hasn't seen a real human being in their entire existence

[brave aspen]

what ?

[gritty python]

https://tenor.com/view/ddjoedirt-ddjoedirtrighon-ddright-on-gif-2436723797052097026

same person

[frosty wigeon]

@storm quartz seems like i cant use SPT atm lol

[brave aspen]

that’s not ragman that’s sleep paralysis ragman

[gritty python]

nah that's joe dirt

[frosty wigeon]

PVE mode here i go

[gritty python]

yes lmao

that's why i said no not the copy paste dialogue

[viral egret]

traders look like they're drugged tf up

[gritty python]

i can't wait to see prapor's ugly ass

[keen sparrow]

?

[gritty python]

lookin like sid's cousin

[brave aspen]

omg i just saw therapist’s model LOL

krokodil vendor

[frosty wigeon]

i dont get it on the traders in raid
so you cant trade with them when on main menu?

[glacial haven]

lmao

[frosty wigeon]

anyone playing PVE mode?

no friendly fire in pve mode?

[gritty python]

no one really playing much of anything lmao

[frosty wigeon]

wait
is tarkov fcked atm?

[gritty python]

for most ppl yea

[frosty wigeon]

kek

guess ill wait for it to settle down

[gritty python]

im doing the age old "give it 2 days"

[soft coral]

Jar is so full I need a second jar to put pennies in

[gritty python]

can’t wait to look jaeger in the eyes when he tells me to go dehydrate myself in the woods on purpose

[frosty wigeon]

how to raid in pve? is there a selector?

[short cove]

Show

[viral egret]

its same as normal tarkov

[frosty wigeon]

wtf i cant login

[soft coral]

this is fucking hilarious

[long bay]

You toggle it in the main menu I believe

[frosty wigeon]

kek

bruh

[gritty python]

[frosty wigeon]

this is bullshit XD

welp
i guess ill wait

[brave aspen]

you know what i’m not even mad

this is still that unique fucked up tarkov experience in its own way

[gritty python]

anyone surprised by this has not played tarkov for anymore than 1000 hours

[frosty wigeon]

that says im new to the game

[brave aspen]

“you thought we had a turbo man doll here AT the studio? we said you’d get a turbo man doll eventually”

[short cove]

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

[gritty python]

yea patches been dropping like this for 8 years

i told yall

[short cove]

LINKING TWITH IS ACTUALLY CRAZYY

[soft coral]

https://tenor.com/view/jerry-eating-amc-perfectly-popcorn-mouse-yum-yum-delicious-gif-15877432887457947334

well

well

well

[gritty python]

worst brand of popcorn

[brave aspen]

keep scrolling up you’ll see it lol

[gritty python]

i got an ace scientific to farm

[keen sparrow]

kinda wish i had stablediffusion right now

so i could image to image therapist doing heinous shit

bro even the login button has a cooldown, wtf

[brave aspen]

lmfao

[short cove]

she requires your ass

[storm quartz]

https://tenor.com/view/this-is-bullshit-bullshit-gordon-ramsey-gordon-ramsay-gif-21804472

[daring torrent]

she is kinda pretty...

[keen sparrow]

OH YEAH

[little flame]

I STILL CANT GET IN

KILL ME

[keen sparrow]

doesn't the SPT installer check if your EFT is up to date?

[daring torrent]

for some reason i can access pve but not regular

[short cove]

guh

[daring torrent]

and the pve is from like when it first released so its not updated and cant wipe it

[keen sparrow]

oh you just saved me a fuck ton of time, thank you

[gritty python]

lmao

[daring torrent]

🫡

[keen sparrow]

gonna boot OSRS

[gritty python]

time to make maple longbows

[keen sparrow]

a good game, I know foreign conecpt right?

[soft coral]

ye ok my bad for opening steam

[daring torrent]

this is like when bannerlord released and it broke steam for multiple hours

[ancient marsh]

@stark torrent

[little flame]

thats crazy

ivan special

[stark torrent]

https://tenor.com/view/cut-it-out-smh-stop-it-jonah-hill-no-way-gif-26885587

[gritty python]

you mean whenever they drop the ship dlc here in a few days

[keen sparrow]

i wondered why all the sales are fucking gooner bate bait

[gritty python]

deadass

[soft coral]

I fucking open steam to check something in my library

and see this

[daring torrent]

https://tenor.com/view/vince-mcmahon-crying-weeping-sad-mcmahon-gif-9909335632125829822

[soft coral]

lord wtf

[gritty python]

the bannerlord boat dlc is coming out in like a week

[short cove]

does anyone else get gateway timeout?

[stark torrent]

yes the launcher is fucked

[daring torrent]

bannerlord sucks ass and theres only like one good mod

[short cove]

truly a nikita moment

[keen sparrow]

yo TRUE

[viral egret]

all i get is error 0 task cancelled

[daring torrent]

and im pretty sure it already has naval

[little flame]

pog

[gritty python]

well they're making a like AC black flag type dlc that completely revamps the game

adding new continents and factions and peoples

it's actually gonna be goat, have seen gameplay alr

[gritty python]

the fact i actually managed to clock that

nogenerals got a killa helmet already

lmao

[little flame]

das crazy

[keen sparrow]

wdym, like how long it would take?

[gritty python]

no just that you'd be crafting bows

[keen sparrow]

Oh

no i've been stuck in Vorkath hell

this'll be a good break from that

[glacial haven]

just refresh the page

[little flame]

[daring torrent]

https://tenor.com/view/triple-h-wwf-wwe-the-game-gif-20998973

[little flame]

bruh

got logged out

[gritty python]

my wait timer is actively going up

[daring torrent]

psychological warfare

[glacial haven]

damn, it worked for me

[little flame]

chat am i missing a dlc or some new thing to be able to log in?

[frosty wigeon]

heh

[foggy jay]

how to get the launcher working guys? Just spam open it? or login logout?

[gritty python]

[glacial haven]

probably just wait

do not logout

[little flame]

you dont, thats the fun part.

[glacial haven]

you will be back in the queue

just keep it open

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/funny-gif-9791600234365446047

[gritty python]

itll remedy itself here in a bit hopefully

[gritty python]

https://tenor.com/view/blinking-eyes-white-guy-blinking-meme-what-huh-gif-26334322

[daring torrent]

they cannot be serious

[foggy jay]

I don't think they know how Bitcoin work

[daring torrent]

the items are seperate halves too so you would have to get them to match to craft a full one im assuming

[keen sparrow]

rate the fit homie

[foggy jay]

but what happens then?

[gritty python]

look like ur about to go paint and have ur day ruined by a pker

[foggy jay]

the waiting room is just to access the website, not the download in the launcher

[daring torrent]

in all honesty ill probably wipe the game, look at the new items and then play a better game

[short cove]

You dont seem to be involved in the tarkov community

[gritty python]

launcher is fucked in general rn

[daring torrent]

i already have it downloaded i just need to wipe the profile

[short cove]

Nikita is fucking retarded

Thats why

[short cove]

Any special new guns?

[gritty python]

that base ergo

[short cove]

Except that?

[foggy jay]

I did most wipes so I know what to expect.

[short cove]

Well you seem surprised why nikita dident done a predownload

[keen sparrow]

Barrel length jit

it's long

[brave aspen]

interchange expansion looked cool. too bad beef died lol

[dapper grotto]

[gritty python]

waiting for my launcher to wake up from it's drunken stupor and clamber into the launch page

[compact knoll]

i dont feel like screenshoting every single one

[fleet carbon]

Still can't even log into the launcher

[compact knoll]

tkpd has lvl 4 one shot body bullet

[daring torrent]

honestly really bad release date tbh

eu5 cod and on a saturday

[little flame]

LMAOO

[gritty crest]

server is down..........

[foggy jay]

https://www.reddit.com/r/EscapefromTarkov/comments/1oxr9fo/gamma_container_became_250_lunch_box_in_10/

is this true ?

[little flame]

yes

u cant lie on the internet

ofc its true

[keen sparrow]

all this shit to make 4.5 mil gp/hour

[gritty python]

meanwhile you could go to the arena and be a debt broker

[little flame]

lol

[keen sparrow]

i hate how right you are

[gritty python]

[short cove]

@keen sparrow Spt broke

[soft coral]

lovely start to 1,0

all tehse years

[little flame]

ay chat im getting new errors when im trying to log in

[gritty python]

verybadscav has resolved to streaming a member in his chat loading in to ground zero

4 and a half minutes matching

[little flame]

cinema

https://tenor.com/view/scorsese-absolute-cinema-meme-gif-9523375912274476782

[gritty python]

guys we got april fools'd, this is actually .17 patch

[foggy jay]

that's what you got after waiting right?

[gritty python]

[gritty crest]

yes

[foggy jay]

exactly as I thought

[soft coral]

yet another

I told you so

[gritty crest]

[little flame]

i fucking hate bsg bruh

[foggy jay]

only way is to spam the launcher

[little flame]

i did that then i got signed out

[gritty python]

the launcher has a built in pocketwatch

[stark torrent]

[fast garden]

https://tenor.com/view/speed-try-not-to-laugh-speed-dont-laugh-gif-9393628858940137350

[little flame]

https://tenor.com/view/speed-ishowspeed-ksi-speed-trying-not-to-laugh-speed-laughing-gif-15969897472035948306

[gritty python]

https://tenor.com/view/cooked-dog-cooked-dog-meme-bro-is-finished-finished-cooked-gif-14138319004290811594

[wintry ridge]

bro

its s oover

i was in pve and im stuck changing to pvp

[little flame]

skill issue

[cosmic timber]

1.0 ready

[keen sparrow]

aaaw man, right as you were about to get some head

[keen sparrow]

aaw man

right as you were about to get some head

[gritty python]

dont bother that just goes to the website which is as down as down gets

[cosmic timber]

everythings fucked\

[keen sparrow]

why are there so many new goobers here

wtf

[gritty python]

im an alt for a dif acc]

idk abt the rest

[cosmic timber]

look at this new cool start menu

[soft coral]

"cool new start menu" just 2 dudes

istg this community is like apple fans

bsg change 1 pixel and people go ape shit

[cosmic timber]

i js said it looks cool why are you getting fucking pressed

[soft coral]

it do

I guess

[cosmic timber]

plus they changed trader menus and shit

[gritty crest]

nikita press dead button

noooooooooooooo

[gritty python]

guy is still matching on stream

11 minutes

[gritty crest]

D E A T H

[foggy jay]

I know i'll get fucked though that's the best part

[foggy jay]

did you try closing and reoppening the launcher ? XD

[stark torrent]

killing myself

[foggy jay]

you got booted out and now this right?

[compact knoll]

https://tenor.com/view/funny-gif-9791600234365446047

[stark torrent]

nah i couldnt even launch the game so far

[gritty python]

it's an infinite loop into the website being down

it opens into maintenance

[foggy jay]

Wait, Interchange and ground zero as the first maps?

[gritty python]

for the expansions

[cosmic timber]

once u get in the website it will show just a maintenance screen fyi

[foggy jay]

Btw, 1.0 and Terminal is "not available"

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/952523705483948142/996403939203350588/E20D2199-DBB5-4F2D-903E-85418CCD7E1B.gif

[cosmic timber]

p sure u gotta finish the story for it

[compact knoll]

street too

[cosmic timber]

its probably the same shit as raid if you ever watched that

[gritty crest]

💀 💀 💀

[foggy jay]

https://tenor.com/view/shake-my-head-snoop-dogg-red-table-talk-smh-oh-man-gif-16483630

[cosmic timber]

where the scavs raid the base and the black division invadaes and kills everyone

[foggy jay]

8 years of customs, and now it's the 3 worst maps

[gritty python]

[cosmic timber]

i think interchange got reworked

or expanded

[foggy jay]

Ground zero makes sense

but INTERCHANGE is just pure cancer

The main issue is that this concentrates the players even more

[cosmic timber]

hello i passed the first minigame

FUCK

[foggy jay]

good luck not getting killed in goshan food shelves

[cosmic timber]

yeah tomorrowe this will be playable

[gritty python]

watched a raid of it already, makes that map even more framey than it was before too

[cosmic timber]

for sure..

[cosmic timber]

a stream?

[gritty python]

ye

nogenerals got into a raid

[cosmic timber]

yeah well they are streaming so idk

[gritty python]

and watching a guy on GZ rn

[foggy jay]

OMG

[gritty python]

😲

[foggy jay]

Had 35min left on login website, just rebooted the launcher and voila

reboot the launcher every 3-4 min until it works

[cosmic timber]

hpw tje fuck

did you get in

[gritty python]

well the problem ppl are having

is that it logged them out of their acc

and the auth server for that is fucked

[foggy jay]

https://tenor.com/view/event-gif-2408508283869815396

[cosmic timber]

it js sends me to the login screen

[gritty python]

so regardless of launcher functionality till that's fixed, we're stuck here

[foggy jay]

phoned Nikita

It's downloading right now

waiting for the countdown to finish is useless

[hasty elk]

perfect time to play gamma

[gritty python]

holy shit

a bird pooped on your arm

[ancient marsh]

[cosmic timber]

if i ever dmca someone i will also not see the project

[viral egret]

I FINALLY GOT IN

GOD

[ancient marsh]

he looks like ps2 tony soprano

[cosmic timber]

this isnt the problem

[compact knoll]

nikita's name on my buttocks

[hasty elk]

i mean, some of us still have it locally thankfully

i hope this is going well for u now tho

[cosmic timber]

its gonna restart the launcher and make u login

you canot login

[foggy jay]

I have a 100Mo/s connection

[ancient marsh]

queen of spades

[fast garden]

oohrah

[foggy jay]

Servers are crumbling under the download

[viral egret]

i logged in

[cosmic timber]

mf is tryna play multiplayer

[foggy jay]

how long was the matching?

[cosmic timber]

it will never queue

[fast garden]

time to find out

[gritty python]

gladiator + champ pants ultimate drip

[ancient marsh]

low gfx actually make the game look like ass

W

[cosmic timber]

i guess its time to go back to spt

this shit will never work

[hybrid kindle]

Been so long that i played live tarkov, forgot the password and now the site to recover it is in maintenance lmao

[soft coral]

he was so confident on stream and what happened? complete shit show

[cosmic timber]

this shit is too funny

[stark torrent]

holy shiot

[soft coral]

holy retarded fat russian

[gritty python]

LMAO

[soft coral]

what a joke man

[keen sparrow]

filling my SSD with melted dogshit, 1 sec

[cosmic timber]

this happens every wipe is anyone actually impressed

[neat fractal]

why the steam price went up a bit

[soft coral]

you mean surprised?

impressed is wrong word