🎪bruh-fart

[abstract path]

Lmao

[heady crow]

@stone blade

Would fit well with your death tee no?

[stone blade]

da

[stone blade]

thats literally me

[random rapids]

It's him!

[silk oracle]

https://tenor.com/view/crazy-german-flag-germany-trikot-gif-12218101

I am from the northern coast of germany, and we are very different from the southern germans, which are usually the people non-germans think about, when they think about Germany That might be the reason

[abstract path]

I am somwhere inbetween uh
East and north

[upbeat bobcat]

You mean English parliament?

Meeting happening in UK are the top tier meme

[placid sail]

yeah I've got some stories on english bureaucracy too

[sturdy otter]

as somebody from southern Germany i can confirm

like it funny how different south to north and the other way around is

[placid sail]

so

which part of germany is alarmingly pedantic, south or north? or both?

[abstract path]

I think both tbh

[silk oracle]

The middle lmao

Northerners and southerners are generally quite chill, the people living in Berlin etc are the troublemakers 😄

[abstract path]

Yes

I luckily don't live there

[placid sail]

one of my buddies lives in uuuuhhhhhhhhhh

[real tinsel]

that's a strange name for a city

[placid sail]

Frankfurt am Main

here

funny name

[silk oracle]

Ahh, yes. That is a funny city

[placid sail]

why?

[abstract path]

Why do i know that place

[placid sail]

cos you german silly

[abstract path]

Ofc

[real tinsel]

you're german dummy

[placid sail]

and it's in germany (or so I've been told)

[abstract path]

It is

[silk oracle]

The people there are a bit strange, or so I have heard. There are many memes about frankfurt

[abstract path]

It's "close" if you drive by train

From siegen ofc

[placid sail]

he told me he uses some app to raid different restaurants and cafes for their leftovers for a highly reduced price

aaaand that's about all I know from him about that city

[abstract path]

XD

[placid sail]

well, the photos are nice, you germans have a nice amount of green spaces

[abstract path]

True true

[silk oracle]

Hahaha, yeah that stuff is also in the Netherlands

[abstract path]

I live right next to a forest in fact

[silk oracle]

This is where I come from

[placid sail]

damn daniel

[silk oracle]

It's super nice

East Frisia at the northen coast

We also have a bunch of islands, but they are infested by tourism and birds, so fuck that lmao

[placid sail]

https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/b/neuharlingersiel-east-frisia-fishing-village-named-neuharlingersiel-located-east-frisia-germany-168150194.jpg

what the fuck is this

is it real?

it's like some fairy tail or a historical book

amazing

[real tinsel]

how does one become a citizen of wherever this is

[placid sail]

yeah, europeans know how to live

[real tinsel]

cries in postsoviet doomer lifestyle

[silk oracle]

Yes, this is 100% real lmao

I think thats Greetsiel

[upbeat bobcat]

Dunno mang, water textures are kinda off

[placid sail]

https://www.teetied-ostfriesland.de/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Neuharlingersiel_Kutterhafen.jpg

ass

[silk oracle]

Neuharlingersiel!!! Fuck yeah!

[real tinsel]

this man just judged real life graphics

[silk oracle]

THats a good city

[upbeat bobcat]

[heady crow]

ayo why are the buttocks more worn out than the rest?

[silk oracle]

They have a really good icecream shop

[placid sail]

ass

polished to perfection

[real tinsel]

people there must love petting his ass

[heady crow]

prayge

[upbeat bobcat]

Dude has different ass polish

[placid sail]

by hundreds and hundreds of hands

[heady crow]

a work of several generations im sure

[silk oracle]

just search for " ostfriesland shanty chor" and enjoy the musical genius of my forfathers

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/RvGJlDkRqHs

[silk oracle]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBM_2GsWsKU

[heady crow]

recent repost but still

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/J4_LvvnNFX4

[grizzled meadow]

The what now

[placid sail]

if germany and netherland had a baby

[heady crow]

i wish i knew

[silk oracle]

This is more accurate than you know

[heady crow]

or im happy that i dont know

[silk oracle]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGOx4oG3Q3g another great classic shanty

[heady crow]

since we posting shanties now
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZipDpTrak7U

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/LZUhdLQC4Cs

[placid sail]

free bird

[silk oracle]

Good song

[sturdy otter]

based

[upbeat bobcat]

I felt this

[placid sail]

mowtendoo has once again found his way into brainfart

god bless

[real tinsel]

i'm so glad memes have evolved into this

[stone blade]

chad

[placid sail]

I've only realised he has the same accent as you

so probably scandinavian as well

[heady crow]

hes finnish

and finnish is a finno uralic language while danish, swedish etc are north germanic so our accents are quite different

[placid sail]

why don't you want to be bros with your scandinavian neighbors tho

are they so bad

[heady crow]

finnish superiority 💪 🇫🇮 🐻

but nah its mostly friendly banter between us nowadays

ofc there is the backround of us being conquered by sweden etc

[placid sail]

the banter is friendly, but the gun is armed, too smiles at sweden

[heady crow]

thats for not helping us in the winter war

[placid sail]

fun fact: russia's current Shittening was deployed at roughly the same casus belli as in winter war

that's when you realise that, in fact, it was soviet union all along

and sob a little out of disbelief and anguish

[heady crow]

btw whats the governments stand on Shelling of Mainila nowadays?

[placid sail]

not sure, but judging by our main imperative of foreign politics being "DENY EVERYTHING" and widespread sympathy for soviet union

probably a lot of denial and talking back

the average age of a government representative here is about, 58, I think?

especially among higher-ups

so it isn't really "being inspired by soviet union", it's the fucking old geezers from the very soviet union itself still clinging to life and stirring shit up while being one foot in the grave

[heady crow]

hmm yeah would make sense so

i heard that for a while they aknowledged it like the western world at the end of the soviet union

but i might not correctly remember

[upbeat bobcat]

Typical english moment

[sturdy otter]

i like how his face says lol, while his body already goes into "wtf mate?" and the dude beside him looks like "did i leave the stove running?"

[placid sail]

it is a possibility, because near the end, almost everything was denounced, ideology, motivation, shady historical moves and all

but guess fucking whaaaat it doesn't matter because every other boomer in Russia except for one or two thinks "well it wasn't that shitty in soviet union, so..."

[abstract path]

Me when doom:

[placid sail]

there is this one memeish funny argument which is sometimes unironically used by boomers

мороженое за 28 копеек

(ice cream for 28 kopek (it's like cents to dollar)

[sturdy otter]

i found 50 kopek in the sea once

the elder only laught at me and i bought ice cream

fuck thats like so long ago, im getting old

[placid sail]

you can buy absolutely nothing with them in Russia

it's usage is nonexistent here for... uh... like, 10-15 years?

I don't think you can buy anything even for 10 rubles, really

but, funnily, The Bank of Russia stopped minting kopecks only in 2019

[sturdy otter]

well nearly 20 years did pass by now mate

[placid sail]

I am not saying that you couldn't have used them or anything, just saying they have disappeared from transactions completely for a while now

[upbeat bobcat]

Was just gonna ask how much for that bottle of that water in roubles in general

[stone blade]

he will be consumed soon

[placid sail]

this 330ml bad boy right here will cost you 29,90 rubles

which is actually just 30 rubles, but retail is a scum

which is rougly 0,36 dollars, but you can't actually buy or sell dollars easily rn, and the exchange rate is artificially held by the government to escape panic and default, so it is irrelevant 😎

[sturdy otter]

oh thats okay im just still realising how fucking old i get

[placid sail]

47 and taken

old and cranky exo suit from far future

[upbeat bobcat]

ya I know the situation, was just wondering compared to my money which seems a lot for 330ml sheesh

[placid sail]

a lot? nah my dude, I picked the cheapest water for you, since it's all the same and I don't want you to waste your money

here's something more fancy for you

125 rubles for 500ml

[upbeat bobcat]

Holy shit

[placid sail]

(on sale!)

(great deal!)

[upbeat bobcat]

Was about to say at the same price, you could get 3 of them 330ml in my country eh

But I'm just gonna

[real tinsel]

they do this here too

[placid sail]

there will be a moment here soon, predicted to be in summer or autumn

when the government will just have to "release" the currency exchange rate, since they can't inflate it forever

and it's going to be hell

when dollar will cost 200 rubles or more

[upbeat bobcat]

Isn't Rouble gained it's position again thanks to petrol?

[placid sail]

shit will go down very fast and very hard

[real tinsel]

New Objective: Survive

[upbeat bobcat]

Gas isn't so much important cuz it's spring time but petrol, Germany couldn't live without it

[sturdy otter]

as a german i can relate

[silk oracle]

Germany: "We will give Russia 10 sanctions. And keep buying all their petrol and gas"

[upbeat bobcat]

Exactly

[placid sail]

it just couldn't have gained so much on petrol alone, the sanctions, the mass exodus of foreign companies and investers... they just inflate it with their reserves, and they shut down the state exchange every couple days to hide it

[sturdy otter]

oh they said it way more stupid and we both know it

[silk oracle]

Yeah...

[sturdy otter]

but ye dont know how they did see that one comming >.>

[placid sail]

oil refineries are full to the brim right now

because almost nobody is buying

[upbeat bobcat]

[sturdy otter]

isnt it more like nobody CAN buy it right now because not everyone has an account at the russian federal bank or something? at least thats what they tell us

[placid sail]

so yeah, if I am to disappear around summer on autumn, well, it was nice knowing you guys, but I guess this is an acceptable cost to root this evil out of the world

[sturdy otter]

i dont think you are evil tho

[placid sail]

you can buy or sell currency in any bank without any specific condition, but around a month ago, all buying was prohibited

you could only sell your dollars and euros

[upbeat bobcat]

Just a heads up tho, money, trade and stuff discussion I guess okay but above will be against the politics rules things here, we shouldn't wander in too much

[placid sail]

though, of course, there is a black market, it is a common experience for postsoviet people to buy foreign currency under the table

[placid sail]

I don't want to talk about it either

[upbeat bobcat]

Don't let Aldo smell it

[sturdy otter]

yeah as much as i did like to talk a bit more about its getting heavy

so we should switch to memes

[placid sail]

gladly

[sturdy otter]

did you madlad actually wait until we been done?

[upbeat bobcat]

[heady crow]

i have my manners

[sturdy otter]

it hurts me to friggin know each and everyone of them D:

[placid sail]

https://tenor.com/view/anime-smug-gif-22677264

[placid sail]

lmao, he did just stand there with a bucket of memes, waiting menacingly

[placid sail]

sorry to interrupt your routine

[upbeat bobcat]

Yiellow yiellow

[heady crow]

and at this point idk if i can post even half of them

[sturdy otter]

ikr xD

[random rapids]

I keep seeing the memes disappear. It's like watching news articles get deleted.

[sturdy otter]

to soon bro to soon

[upbeat bobcat]

Mang only for the shits and giggles, we should do csgo some time

[upbeat bobcat]

Reaching for those stereotypes

[heady crow]

bro frr

we are all close to russian servers anyways

[real tinsel]

bruno what's this song called

[heady crow]

only lead i could find
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wyi8v4dJBmk

probs not the og song but just uses the sample

[placid sail]

that is precisely why I play league EUW

[heady crow]

same

eune is a trip

but i got like 3 accs on both of the servers

[random rapids]

Y'all don't play on NA servers to get Lag Advantage?

Come on, man.

[upbeat bobcat]

I'm Turkish and I'm feeling the same vibes, our people are so similiar considering toxicity

[placid sail]

eu east is slightly cursed too, but it's OH KURWA JA PERDOLE instead

[heady crow]

NA, AKA. "No Americans" is a Riot Games' Minor League that is often associated with very low domestic player participation (2/5). Is also ridiculed for being washed-up and it is specifically known for its obnoxious fanbase and mind-numbing throws.

[upbeat bobcat]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-BgREkkjcg

[heady crow]

ye full of serbians and polish ppl who dont know how to speak english

but then again in euw there are french

[random rapids]

I've gotten so many kills on NA Noobs. They stand no chance.

[heady crow]

NA, aka 'No Achievements' is the weakest region in the professional League of Legends scene. They are specifically known for their clown fiestas and never winning anything worthwhile in the history of League of Legends.

[upbeat bobcat]

Mang my 1500 hours CSGO experience is half about French people friendly and enemy team just chatting up whole game long

[random rapids]

Your honor,

League of Legends-

Death.

[placid sail]

I've encountered some weird guys from north africa who has numbers in their words and they're also extremely rude, almost like my own people

[random rapids]

Mortis.

[heady crow]

mine was just russians and the occasional swede

[upbeat bobcat]

Good thing you didn't meet my people

[random rapids]

My CSGO experience is not making it past the halfway point of the map.
And angry Czech people.

[heady crow]

i am thankful for that too

[random rapids]

And North Americans who can't aim (On my team, of course.)

[heady crow]

btw bz you know doaenel right?

[real tinsel]

man the angry czech people are everywhere in cs go

and angry russian people

[placid sail]

I've seen some turkish guys from time to time in EUW, but they tend to speak turkish only and it's hard to tell if they're insulting me or not

[real tinsel]

and angry turkish people

angry german people

[random rapids]

You would not believe how many Czechs play CS.

[placid sail]

I usually just write cigara ichmek oldurur to them and that's it

[random rapids]

It's like a religion over here.

[upbeat bobcat]

Imagine when you're into an online game and there's friendly people, they ask you where you from.. I have to explain like I'm not like that stereotype for a couple hours

[real tinsel]

why

[placid sail]

that's the only thing I know in turkish

[upbeat bobcat]

Turkish swears are like Russians, you can just tell

[upbeat bobcat]

That means smoking kills

[placid sail]

yes, because I've learned it from the cigarette box I've bought in Turkey

[random rapids]

It's him.

[real tinsel]

"guys i swear i would never yell at you several made up swears when i die"

[placid sail]

but imagine their surprise!

what can you even say in response?

[real tinsel]

not really

czech swear are somewhat similar to russian

[heady crow]

if someone says some random shit in finnish id answer like "mitä vittua :DDDD" or something

[upbeat bobcat]

I meant like the toning

[placid sail]

league of legends actually figured out how to reduce amount of fuckery in the chat

[real tinsel]

yes toning is similar

[random rapids]

Probably because we're Slavic.

[placid sail]

they just give you rewards now if you don't fuck around in chat

[heady crow]

oh god that reminds me when i got a 14 day ban on my main acc just due to chatting xd

[random rapids]

How?

Wait, this is peculiar.

[upbeat bobcat]

Best part about publishers that some of them actually ban Russian and Turkish IP's and give them their own server so they can just kill each other

[real tinsel]

i'd get random bans in cs go because i kept accidentally killing teammates

[placid sail]

Aldourien should reward us too for good behaviour

[real tinsel]

with expert tools

[upbeat bobcat]

ikr

[heady crow]

well a enemy lucian and brand were talking in all chat how brand called lucian an nword and i responded "isnt it justified for brand to call you (the actual full nword) since lucian is black?"

then he said for me to go fuck my own mother and said hed file a ticket on me

[placid sail]

oh god

dude

[random rapids]

Bruh.

[placid sail]

my russian friends would like you

[heady crow]

dude ive called people sandnwords several times without anything happening bcs riot only punishes those who get filed tickets on or reported xdddd

[upbeat bobcat]

I did so many things in League and Rocket League, got away with my rewards but I wouldn't tell here about what I did

[random rapids]

The full Hard-R.

Last time I saw that was in this one Discord server.

[placid sail]

at some point I just became too lazy to insult somebody

[random rapids]

It was... A strange one, I'll tell you that.

[heady crow]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/262319460461838336/963038274702696468/c_21.mov?size=4096

[real tinsel]

i swear crystal is just waiting for someone to react to something so that he can react to it too

[upbeat bobcat]

It's not insulting on our ends, it's art

[placid sail]

but it was fun first couple thousand of times

[real tinsel]

he's just lying there in his ghillie suit, reading every single channel's chat and as soon as someone reacts anything he reacts the same thing

[random rapids]

He's always watching.

Look.

[real tinsel]

look

[upbeat bobcat]

[real tinsel]

he's toying with us

what an absolute madlad

[heady crow]

last time was today in a server called "cancer caliphate"

[abstract path]

Bap

[upbeat bobcat]

Bup

[random rapids]

What a name!

I'm stealing that.

[placid sail]

that's... oddly specific

[heady crow]

anyways matching pfps when?

[placid sail]

oh wait, cancer, not cancel

right

[real tinsel]

me

with me

now

[random rapids]

That was quick.

[upbeat bobcat]

https://tenor.com/view/need-catgirl-please-petting-gif-21846553

[heady crow]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/285877722801111041/895203927493074944/image0.gif

[abstract path]

Lmao

[random rapids]

Me.

I'm the Warhammer fan.

[placid sail]

I'm about to tell you about Horus' Heresy.

ALL OF IT.

[heady crow]

OH MAN

[sturdy otter]

i need a bigger heavy flamer for this one

[heady crow]

talking about horus heresy

[upbeat bobcat]

Bruh I'm still vibing to the Space Hulk game's mariachi OST

[heady crow]

i found the first 3 books to the series at a antique book store like 2 weeks ago

[random rapids]

Nice.

There are so many goddamn books.

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/WGmmXd8r4YQ

[sturdy otter]

you sure all of it? 12 hours seems a bit short

[random rapids]

Great game.

[heady crow]

https://tenor.com/view/throw-it-back-gif-25029115

[placid sail]

it will be a fast-paced rap, in fact.

The Emperor protects, ya fool.

[random rapids]

Halfway through it turns into a Metal concert.

And then at the end it will be a beautiful choir.

Just like how the Emperor would want it.

[real tinsel]

your turn

[random rapids]

He Actually did it.

[sturdy otter]

that makes awfully lota sense

[heady crow]

@real tinsel

[real tinsel]

hell yeah

[placid sail]

handholding ensues

[real tinsel]

we're gonna do the lewdiest handholdings

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/T-vTvFrS2s8

[placid sail]

https://tenor.com/view/jerry-tom-rat-gif-23865315

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/beia7-DRWTY

https://youtu.be/r6VeAJgoabU

[placid sail]

yooooo

https://tenor.com/view/archimedes-physics-science-volume-displacement-gif-22083881

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/tSj-SrZTpPc

[placid sail]

I wonder what you'll make out of this video without any understanding of spoken words at all

https://youtu.be/3G1nnD3Jaqk

dude, why are not watching any russian content

well, there was an incident

https://youtu.be/fEQ21uavvis

trembles with all his body

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/jE7LnfD9eno

[pastel quartz]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/935989994735169546/963122096941183056/trim.7F6C639C-364A-46E1-8396-C4DC3551C4F8.mov

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/935989994735169546/963121013237878884/trim.70CCC9A8-14C3-4E5A-92FC-3EC20CA5CE0E.mov

[gloomy roost]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/708899616439009332/962376120198647828/VID_20220408_165756_958.mp4

[sturdy otter]

tis is getting out of hand by now xD

[placid sail]

you think?

[gloomy roost]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764963672421957642/963111555715723334/mortal_kombat-1.mp4

[sturdy otter]

just a little

[placid sail]

nah mate

https://youtu.be/luFfeSYrcEo

it's fine

https://youtu.be/LZE1yq880xA

[placid sail]

there is no end to revengeance

[placid sail]

https://coub.com/view/305si5

https://youtu.be/W_S18KQIzkg

[undone wave]

https://youtu.be/HmY067CJ7s4

[undone wave]

#🎪bruh-fart moment

[placid sail]

https://loginportal.funnyjunk.com/movies/Intern+starling_4921d9_9482684.mp4

[sturdy otter]

but can she do that with a pseudogiant?

[placid sail]

huh

[real tinsel]

can she do that with my head

no actually i've had second thoughts, i don't want her to do that with my head

[stone blade]

violence

[zenith grove]

peace was never an option

[upbeat bobcat]

https://tenor.com/view/knife-gif-13790649

[placid sail]

NSFF (Not Safe For Falco)

[heady crow]

oh god that video

[stone blade]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Owj5AtNeVoA

😭 no more

[real tinsel]

my virgin ass on my very first date with a girl

[upbeat bobcat]

Ora ora

[stone blade]

same.

🤝

[placid sail]

yikes dating girls is gay

[narrow lotus]

true, your zero two body pillow is all u need

[placid sail]

burer in da party it's lit

[silk oracle]

Nah mate, thats one of the rare midget controllers that run funny, I forgot their name

[real tinsel]

dating guys is gay dumb dumb. Dating girls is hetero

[placid sail]

nah nah nah, you got it all wrong. it is the manliest thing to date a guy, hence it is not gay.

[real tinsel]

no my friend to date a man is gay, which still is a manly thing

wanting to fight swords with each other's dicks with your spouse is the manliest thing ever

[stone blade]

hi

[real tinsel]

hi

[real tinsel]

good luck ivan

[stone blade]

tu

ty

[heady crow]

Fr

[placid sail]

that meme got me confused

are germans exclusive to, well, regular ass windows, which even we have?

or windows are their kink of sorts

r*ddit is very confusing today

[real tinsel]

this looks like something made by americans

[placid sail]

then why mention germans specifically?

[real tinsel]

whoever made it probably thinks only germans have windows like that

i mean come on, it was made by an american

[placid sail]

what do americans have rows of coca-cola bottles instead of actual windows?

it's like what comrade Stalin was saying all these years!

man, I wish I'd get to visit morica someday

[undone wave]

They had these when I was in Germany

[heady crow]

This looks like made by americans

[placid sail]

okay

fuck you, r*ddit, you gaslighting american shihole

[heady crow]

I agree, down with the western capitalistic liberal propaganda

[placid sail]

I am trying to understand the world through memes! and they're feeding me lies!

[heady crow]

But fr i saw that post 2 times and apparently its by an actual finn. The thing just is that no one is forced to go to the defence forces

Theres also the option of going to the civil forces

[placid sail]

I think the implication here is not that finnish men need to go to the army, but that they really want it?

well, Bruno, do you want to go to the army?

[heady crow]

I am excited for it yes

[placid sail]

huh

[heady crow]

And everyone who i know has gone or is going expect for one of my cousins

And a few guys who couldnt go due to medical reasons

[placid sail]

so at least that meme is somewhat true

interesting

[undone wave]

I'm likely not draftable in the U.S. given I couldn't pass an airman medical

[real tinsel]

haha i told you it was made by an american

[undone wave]

No bug screens

I got stung by a bee

[real tinsel]

aw

are you american

[undone wave]

Yep

[real tinsel]

i'm sorry

[placid sail]

I had to pay some money several years ago to forge a medical condition in order to escape the draft, because army service here sucks ass, brings no worth or experience whatsoever and basically is a year of undersleeping, eating dog barf and painting of the grass with green paint and standing on patrol in an empty corridor for 8 hours, with a side dish of bullying and money extortion

also my friend who got drafted almost got send to Donbass which was a warzone at the time

[undone wave]

Mein Deutsch ist immer noch scheiße.

[real tinsel]

haha same

[placid sail]

https://tenor.com/view/sob-arnold-gif-12406885

[real tinsel]

but i didn't really have to forge much because i do have a medical condition

and now if they diagnose me with a mental condition too, i probably will never have to pay money for draft stuff

[placid sail]

well, at least you've saved yourself some money

[placid sail]

don't know the laws at your place, but here draft is over after 27

so you don't even have to go insane if you're around that age or older

[real tinsel]

i have duck feet which apparently is a serious condition in army

[placid sail]

it is

[real tinsel]

i honestly never knew duck feet are that bad until i saw my ex's feet

until then i thought my feet are pretty normal

[placid sail]

it is not much of a mystery, really - flat feet makes you really bad at marching for long distances; you get sores and exhaustion much earlier than you're supposed to

[real tinsel]

i can't even march

[real tinsel]

when i was in school my army teacher would just leave me out of marching trainings because i couldn't do it no matter what

[placid sail]

also, if I remember correctly, you can get a bail if you got moles, either many or in specific places

because they can get hurt by army fatigues

needless liability

[real tinsel]

i literally marched like this

[placid sail]

but really, I've encountered the fact that a lot of times the comission doesn't give a fuck if you're even alive

[undone wave]

U.S. army recruiters are a different breed

Always patrolling around high schools trying to get the poorer kids to enlist so they can afford college

[real tinsel]

walking doesn't hurt much though. Like, i can walk for hours and not get tired

[undone wave]

I've heard rumors that they get kids to lie about the medications they're on too

[placid sail]

you should consider using orthopedic insoles, it won't cure your feet, but it will make long walks manageable

they aren't even that expensive, really

[undone wave]

U.S. Army E-Sports

[placid sail]

well, used to be, at least, before ruble turned into rubles

[placid sail]

watched their chat go full monke mode on twitch once

[undone wave]

War Crimes?

[placid sail]

yup

our military shits their pants in the media much more seldom

they don't have to actually convince anybody to join, they can just fucking snatch anyone who is not good enough at bailing out

they also have a very hard kink on comparing themselves with either america or europe every time they mention it

it's never about being a good thing on its own (because everyone knows it's a fucking lie), it's always НАШ ОТВЕТ АМЕРИКЕ instead

crungo

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/NZzXzymUgEg

[undone wave]

The whole infantilized anime voice thing creeps me out, likely because it's usually an adult doing it for the entertainment of weirdo weebs.

[upbeat bobcat]

Loli voice

[undone wave]

🤮

[upbeat bobcat]

It's much more than creepy

"Loli" is most of the time just being underage but they can't do anything because it's all digital

[undone wave]

absolutely fucked

[upbeat bobcat]

Japan has the top of the line taboos and fetishes, happens on the culturally pressured people.

[real tinsel]

delete the space between emojis to make whole cheems

[undone wave]

he is whole now

[real tinsel]

hell yeah

[real tinsel]

hell yeah

[upbeat bobcat]

[real tinsel]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA spinhead do spin

[upbeat bobcat]

[upbeat bobcat]

Kek that's why human bite is much more dangerous than most things

[real tinsel]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Wj8dOBzf3w

[upbeat bobcat]

The things we reside in our mouths is just toxic

[real tinsel]

no if that was true my ex would be dead

either that or my mouth is just clean

[upbeat bobcat]

https://emedicine.medscape.com/article/218901-overview

They just got lucky

They might even die from an open wound

[real tinsel]

wait bite wounds? You mean like when you bite them and it starts bleeding?

[upbeat bobcat]

Now watch okay_cat come in here and go " df"

[upbeat bobcat]

Yup

I mean as bite bite

[real tinsel]

oh nah i don't bite like that

who the fuck bites like that

[upbeat bobcat]

Not me

[real tinsel]

when someone says "bite" the only thing i think about is biting someone like an anime girl

[upbeat bobcat]

Yeah, I meant as a not playful wya

[real tinsel]

ohh

[upbeat bobcat]

You see in the movies etc as a self defense, people would just bite other's legs even their ear off like just to escape. It's deadly lmao you can just kill someone like that.

[real tinsel]

yea in a turkish movie some old woman bites a man's fucking ear off

[upbeat bobcat]

I'd believe it

[real tinsel]

after that i was kind of afraid of letting anyone bite my easily rippable parts

[upbeat bobcat]

||Giving head is actually a nice weapon to use||

[real tinsel]

good thing i never got one

[upbeat bobcat]

It's the top of the line trusting someone with that and yes, I'm that paranoid with some people

[real tinsel]

man i'm not trusting anyone's mouth with my dick

it's my greatest asset

[upbeat bobcat]

[stone blade]

https://tenor.com/view/me-holding-my-laughter-when-the-priest-says-my-grandmother-is-no-longer-among-us-gif-25003442

[sturdy otter]

chonker

[placid sail]

time for some classics

https://youtu.be/BQ4c54rCJ_k

[real tinsel]

i love this game

[upbeat bobcat]

It's Telltale's poker game right?

Claptrap is fuckin based in there

[real tinsel]

yes

[real tinsel]

yes i loved him in borderlands and i loved him more in poker night

[placid sail]

okay now I think you're insane

who the fuck loves claptrap? he is designed to be annoying

proteeeeect me squireeeee

[placid sail]

this gig is funny though

[real tinsel]

no he isn't

he is?

why would anyone be annoyed by claptrap

he's the coolest character in the entire series

another classic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pb19I3TvtGQ

[placid sail]

lmao there is even a shitty game journalism article regarding the topic

https://www.thegamer.com/claptrap-annoying-borderlands-3-shut-up/

suddenly I feel the urge to like claptrap

[real tinsel]

man fuck journalists

they can suck claptrap's batteries

[placid sail]

but really, though he was funny from time to time, overall he was pretty annoying, but that's just my personal take, so whatever

my favorite character was a psycho who'd asked you passionately to shoot him in the head until you have done so

[real tinsel]

that's many borderlands players' favorite

i didn't see the appeal much with him

[placid sail]

it symbolises the whole borderlands experience for me

[real tinsel]

my other favorite is Brick

he was also my main in bl1

[placid sail]

hehe

he's such a straightforward, no bullshit guy

[real tinsel]

that's probably why i loved him so much

straightforward people turn me on

in a non-sexual way

[placid sail]

I actually like handsome jack, despite him being kind of a cliche very bad guy

[real tinsel]

he wasn't a very bad guy

[placid sail]

he has some actual agenda at least

[sturdy otter]

he wasnt very good in being bad yes

[placid sail]

and a diamond pony

[real tinsel]

compared to the pandora, he was actually decent

[placid sail]

I didn't say he was very bad, or perhaps I wrote it a wrong way

[real tinsel]

you literally said "very bad guy"

[placid sail]

what I've meant is, he is a very bad guy in a very typical way

[sturdy otter]

im saying just because we had to fight him, doesnt mean he was actually a bad guy

just not a good one

[placid sail]

as in "I am going to kill somebody you like and be a cunt about it, I'm going to kill some innocents and be snarky again" and so on

though it was actually well made and kind of fun, this whole dynamic of you doing your stuff and handsome jack calling you on your phone and telling you that he pissed in your cereal, shagged your girlfriend and disliked everything you like

[real tinsel]

he also gives you a quest to kill yourself

[placid sail]

yes!

[real tinsel]

if you complete it, you get 4 iridium

[placid sail]

I did jump

just to hear him being a cunt about it

[real tinsel]

haha me too

didn't care about the iridium, just wanted jack to comment about it

[placid sail]

but it gets old in part three

to be honest, I haven't even played it yet, was just watching some walkthroughs while waiting for it to come on steam, and I've realised it's just basically handsome jack all over again, but there are two of them now

[real tinsel]

and they're psycho influencer types

[placid sail]

oh have you heard btw? there is a standalone game now based on tiny tina's dnd campaign

https://playwonderlands.2k.com/ru-RU/tiny-tinas-assault-on-dragon-keep/

[placid sail]

that was in fact not kek at all, it was cringe

[real tinsel]

that's just tiny tina dlc

except, standalone

[placid sail]

well, yes, but more of separate thing now

with its own plot, classes and such

... I don't know why I brought it up, I have no interest in it myself

[real tinsel]

no that's tiny tina's wonderlands

what you sent is borderlands 2 tiny tina dlc but standalone

[placid sail]

huh?

oh right mb

[real tinsel]

they just put "wonderlands" there for god knows what reason

[placid sail]

they've figured out how to bribe you though

[sturdy otter]

can i go home? this scares me

[real tinsel]

oh my god is this in-game

i'm sold

[placid sail]

locks the door sure, just a second, can't find my keys

[sturdy otter]

starts placing C4 on the wall, no problem i have spares

[placid sail]

yup

he's FAIRY PUNCHFATHER

that is such a strange idea to make it a whole standalone game though

I guess the dlc was selling really, really well

[real tinsel]

cashgrab

reviews say it's faulty too

buggy and stuff

[placid sail]

sigh

[real tinsel]

wonderlands is fucking awesome though

did you watch the trailer

[placid sail]

probably, but hit me up anyway

[real tinsel]

what's hit me up

[placid sail]

I mean, show me

[real tinsel]

ohh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7z4d_PsxIo

[placid sail]

haven't seen that one, looks actually nice

I used to think tiny tina is another quirky loud character just for the sake of it

and then you listen to the logs about her life and go: o-oh...

and then you reach the end of dragon keep and go ooooh...

c-can we go back to being loud and happily annoying, please, this is getting too real

[real tinsel]

and in fight for sanctuary dlc before firing up the rocket, she has this cute but sad speech that just made me stand there for whole 3 minutes

i was just standing there trying to process everything she said

[placid sail]

without these moments borderlands would have been very bland for me

[undone wave]

With a matching grip

[real tinsel]

literally me

[placid sail]

but suddenly everyone being either a clown or a complete psycho makes a lot of sense

[real tinsel]

yes bl1 was bland story-wise

[placid sail]

even fucking claptrap had it rough

[real tinsel]

man they all had it rough

[placid sail]

(and also he've probably commited some warcrimes)

[real tinsel]

jack got betrayed by literally everyone he cared about

[placid sail]

to be fair, he kinda had it coming

[real tinsel]

no way before

his wife betrayed him first

then his teammates

[placid sail]

he gets increasingly violent and warcrime-friendly even before the betrayal

[real tinsel]

then roland's team

[placid sail]

wait, how did his wife betrayed him

uuurgh my memory is all fuzzy, dammit

isn't she like, died because spoiler spoiler an angel of a daughter

[real tinsel]

i don't remember but there was a tape of it in the game

in bl2

[placid sail]

oh hey I actually remember correctly

wife did not bertay

well, unless you consider sudden violent death a betrayal, I suppose

oh wait there are actually two wives what the heck

[real tinsel]

wait what

[real tinsel]

what

[placid sail]

here's the like to the wikiiiiiii, so I won't copypaste too much shit here

https://borderlands.fandom.com/wiki/Handsome_Jack

tl;dr - first wife ||death by accidente because of angel|| second wife ||haha fuck you jack I'm out||

[real tinsel]

ohh so i remember wrong

[placid sail]

but yeah, my point is, Jack was quite inclined to think warcrimes are fun much before the end of the borderlands presequel, or even two waifus incident

jesus why everyone is so fucked over by life in borderlands

[real tinsel]

seriously though everyone there has a fucked up life

no wonder the planet is going to shit

[placid sail]

I mean, it's kind of logical, because it is, well, literally borderlands, as in a shitty frontier planet where the worst of the worst goes to live and plunder each other's asses, where life is short and full of pain, BUT STILL

[real tinsel]

and also coincidentally anyone who flies there is already mentally fucked up

except for probably maya

[placid sail]

oh my god you reminded me of Krieg

sounds of anguish over a fictional character

why are you like this borderlaaaaands

"huh. close enough"

sob at least... at least Zero is having fun

no tragic or horrible backstory, just dude enjoying his life while ending everyone else's

[real tinsel]

do we even have a backstory of zero?

[placid sail]

enigmatic assassin spreading ass cheeks all over the galaxy, seeking not money or power but a challenge itself, speaks in funny japanese poetry form

and that's about it, if I haven't missed something in some sneaky dlc

[real tinsel]

although i'd love an actual backstory for zero, i think him being the mysterious japanese guy makes him better

also apparently he's not human

so, maybe he's from another dimension

a dimension where everyone speaks in haiku

[placid sail]

oh my god... Zero is... an isekai....

well, he got four fingers

he can be a Disney character too

gotta go now, a lot of work tomorrow, gn

[real tinsel]

good night komrad

[sturdy otter]

bruh

[sturdy otter]

funny but might be to close to real life atm

[upbeat bobcat]

https://youtu.be/SZDd0XTbxhI

[upbeat bobcat]

[pastel quartz]

Fellow panzers

[abstract path]

Make em walking bombs

That'd be fun

[sturdy otter]

they already are tho?

[abstract path]

Well tell me which part to shoot then to make em explode

[sturdy otter]

im not sure where their battery is at

we do still talk about the maid robots right?

[abstract path]

Yes

I mean who would even want those maid robots -~-

[sturdy otter]

if they would be actually useful

like actually be able to help you keep shit clean

so far they seem to be nothing more than nightmare fueld "moral" support

[abstract path]

Da

[sturdy otter]

i guess to scare the living crap out of door sales men

"hello would you like to talk - HOLY FUCK!"

[upbeat bobcat]

Mang i don't want them watching me sleep, my demon is a little bit jealous

He got that space covered

[upbeat bobcat]

And program them to play goblin song

[heady crow]

@placid sail @grizzled meadow how i imagine you two basically

[placid sail]

all right come here you little kusipää

https://tenor.com/view/veeunus-angry-fighting-running-attack-on-titan-gif-24674864

I'm holding him Falco! put some spaghetti in his pants!

kids these days, smh fells asleep

[real tinsel]

is stabbing each other a tradition in britain?

[heady crow]

Wait please anything but that!

I already have spaghetti falling from my pockets

[real tinsel]

i doubt you can ever be completely free in a discord server

[stone blade]

you can't

[pastel quartz]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/961314282174300170/963807346092539994/cxmzrulez_20220413_2.mp4

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/961314282174300170/963807503727075368/trim.E8321F91-32FB-4472-9630-A61FFC933FDD.mov

[upbeat bobcat]

[placid sail]

absolutely haram

[undone wave]

Rumor has it that a Russian soldier picked up and held a sample of Cobalt-60 while occupying chernobyl.

[placid sail]

at this point I woudn't be surprised if it was discovered that russian conspricts were making photos with a fucking elephant's foot in the sarcophagus

[gloomy roost]

The forbidden souvenir

[real tinsel]

would it still be dangerous though?

it says in the wiki that radioactive elements of elephant's foot have already decayed

oh nevermind my retardant brain read it wrong

it's still radioactive, just not as much as it used to be

[placid sail]

still wouldn't want to fuck around and find out

and yeah, those poor idiots've made trenches in Red Forest, they're fucked even without coming inside the sarcophagus

[real tinsel]

how the fuck does a space create an entirely different sentence

[placid sail]

https://tenor.com/view/perkele-my-beloved-gif-25008040

[shy rose]

my beloved

[heady crow]

väinämöinen my beloved

[placid sail]

finn-o-vision be like

[heady crow]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/918977368515829820/963298013994942494/ku4c4cycjus81.gif

[real tinsel]

why did you feel the need to post this

[undone wave]

I really hope this doesn't say anything offensive.

[placid sail]

"my greatest plea is to share it, I'm oinking (laughing) for three hours now"

[undone wave]

Pog

[placid sail]

https://tenor.com/view/elmo-hell-yeah-destruction-chaos-gif-8718346

[heady crow]

its so much better with the translatiob

[undone wave]

[stone blade]

my favourite

[heady crow]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/501540861331374094/963868298670399518/RDT_20220413_140414153342447250968976.webp

[jade tide]

stalker

f5 simulator

[heady crow]

@placid sail

[placid sail]

||I don't get it ||

[pastel quartz]

funniest shit ever

i didn't get it

[undone wave]

->

[upbeat bobcat]

Item is Tiamat? and Shen...

uhhhhhhhhh

[heady crow]

tiamat was often rushed as the first item on shen for the waveclear

and built into titanic hydra

which melted adcs with the active

[upbeat bobcat]

[placid sail]

but... why the

uh

[upbeat bobcat]

Imagine playing summoners rift

[placid sail]

I don't get iiiiiiiit

https://tenor.com/view/aneurysm-hhhhomeboyyyy-kings-dark-tidings-saga-by-kel-kade-reaperleviathan-head-explode-gif-21578105

[upbeat bobcat]

He buys the item first but upon updating it

item is gone

That's it

I guess?

[heady crow]

it just was such a strong item on shen ok?

[placid sail]

but the implication of the meme is that tiamat has betrayed shen in some way

[heady crow]

yeah bcs it left due to the item update

[upbeat bobcat]

It's not a meta anymore so he doesn't buy it

Oo

[heady crow]

or well it was butchered and cut in two

[placid sail]

BUT HOW IS IT A BETRAYAL IF IT IS UPGRADED THEREFORE STILL THERE BUT BETTER

I D NOTTNJ AAAHHHH

[upbeat bobcat]

[placid sail]

my pants is shid

[undone wave]

meows

[upbeat bobcat]

[upbeat bobcat]

I forget that there's still people out there thinking smoking weed makes them cool

Even cigs

[placid sail]

anything forbidden is more desirable and cooler

[placid sail]

and it is intoxicating, like alcohol

but not too much fucked up like heroin or doing war crimes

[heady crow]

you got experience in doing war crimes then?

[sturdy otter]

yes

oh you didnt ask me nevermind

[placid sail]

what? why? do I have experience doing heroin? what is this logic? hides heroin

[sturdy otter]

hides war crimes nothing to see here anyway

[placid sail]

to be honest, it isn't really that far-fetched, my fellow citizens are actually commiting war crimes right now

but I'm too soft for that, calling bruno a cunt in finnish is my higher limit, really

[heady crow]

it directly translates to pisshead too

[placid sail]

great, I've chosen well

[placid sail]

what the fuck is this black magic

I've made to 30 seconds before noticing anything

[undone wave]

Step 1 to learning a new language.
Learn all the swears.

[real tinsel]

aet it

[undone wave]

463 RU

[real tinsel]

eat it

niow

eat

[placid sail]

oh shit it keeps working if you repost it

[real tinsel]

eat the foot

i think i'm the weird kid of this chat because every time i show up everyone stops talking

[placid sail]

cognitive bias

everyone in this chat could have suddenly died, but you think everyone is silent because of you

[real tinsel]

shit he knows everything

[placid sail]

don't think about shit too much, enjoy the moments

(do not kill everyone in this chat)

[real tinsel]

eh i try

sometimes it works, most of the times not

[placid sail]

it's okay, it is about making a habit, it's not instant

sounds of The Only Thing I Know For Real coming closer and louder

[placid sail]

kiryu chaaaaaaaaaaan

[sturdy otter]

postnat clarity

[sturdy otter]

also postnat clarity

[placid sail]

https://tenor.com/view/luigi-mario-nut-super-nut-gif-13073710

[placid sail]

great minds think alike

[upbeat bobcat]

blödşhed

Goddaym

[placid sail]

didn't know jerma plays baseball

[real tinsel]

not to boast or anything but i have an ass just like that one

the squats paid off

[upbeat bobcat]

[sturdy otter]

you did it for the twerks didnt you?

[upbeat bobcat]

[real tinsel]

no i did it because my crush at the time liked legs

so i wanted to have muscly legs

thicc ass is just a side effect

[upbeat bobcat]

So you just went reverse Arnold ha

[real tinsel]

although it did attract my last ex because she constantly wanted to fuck me in the ass

[real tinsel]

in a way yes

[sturdy otter]

so did you get your crush? i mean from what im reading you at least kept dat ass

[real tinsel]

well i didn't get her because i was too afraid to make moves at the time

i did get 2 other people though

so the ass paid off

[upbeat bobcat]

[sturdy otter]

its always the same, sorry but for some reason we put effort into it

and then we chicken out

like fuck

why

[sturdy otter]

situation salvaged tho

[real tinsel]

well in the end it doesn't matter because we live on a planet that's millions of years old in a universe that's billions of years old so we're fraction of a fraction of all that

at most 60-70 years

[sturdy otter]

that might be true and im saying "yes we actually do not matter" but still

make the best out of the fucked up time on this ride

[real tinsel]

yes but there's good "we don't matter" and there's bad "we don't matter"

i'm talking about the good one

where is falco by the way

haven't seen him in days

[sturdy otter]

idk but hope he is okay

[real tinsel]

me too

[placid sail]

probably eating best pasta in the world rn

or hunting down a person who invented pineapple pizza

[upbeat bobcat]

[upbeat bobcat]

[stone blade]

she's a little confused but she got the spirit

[placid sail]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/790583051201282058/964064251100663808/unknown.png?width=307&height=582

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/790583051201282058/964081690769248266/16498824053440.mp4

oh my god! watches motionlessly

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/790583051201282058/964083465266024488/16499059080480.mp4

[abstract path]

Ayo ice drift xD

[pastel quartz]

xddd

[upbeat bobcat]

Babuskha dorifto

[upbeat bobcat]

https://tenor.com/view/backing-you-get-yours-danny-devito-danny-devito-gif-13052176

[placid sail]

I was expecting the sizzling of oil in the end

[heady crow]

reminded me of this