(contains mention of r@pe jokes, suicidal thoughts )
It’s not a big issue or problem that im dealing with and but yeah so recently things haven’t been quite nice ….
I just wanted to vent really badly about how sometimes I feel like I’m someone who’s never special in anyone’s life and that im just that one backup friend everyone goes to when they feel tired or when they don’t have anyone.
I never vent to anyone about my problems bc their reactions are always smth like “im sorry” “oh” when I send someone 2 long paragraphs when someone’s day is going bad even when I’m at my lowest.
Recently, at my apartment I got bullied. Those people sent me ||r@pe threats|| and said stuff like ||you should kys|| and started body shaming me. The bullying gets worse everyday and I haven’t told anyone. It hurts me. What did I do to deserve such words.
I can’t tell anyone this irl because.. I just can’t.
Pretending to be happy everyday is so fucking hard.
I really feel like ending it one day so this all bs is over. Like anyone would notice.
No matter how hard I try, somehow im never enough to my friends. One of my closest friends dumped me yesterday all bc of a small disagreement. All our friendship all the paragraphs I wrote her just disappeared and all of it is just meaningless words now.
God please im so sorry I try my best to be okay.