#vent bc feelings r too much

1 messages · Page 6 of 1

torn crag
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i js want to cry and disappear

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i dont want anyone

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no one likes me so i dont want anyone

torn crag
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i cry

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im nothing

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im not worth anything

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no one wants me

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no one wants anythung to do w me

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if they say they do i know its a lie

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everyone is lying to me

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i need to stop

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just stop messaging

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maybe then they wont have to feel guilty for dropping me

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im making things harder for everyone

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if i stop essaging it makes life easier

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im gonna stop messaging to make it easy on her

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she doesnt need me

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its all a lie everytime she says she does

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i dont believe her

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see

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theres proof

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im making life so muc harder for her

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i sai something ni the vent channel

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i deleted it tho

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someoneresponded and basically proved that what i was thinking was true

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i need to stop

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no one wants me

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so im alone

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im ok w being aloone

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maybe i can lock myself in my room for the rest of my life

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ill never amount to anything

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its a lie

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she doesnt want to be w me

torn crag
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im so sad

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that means im a bad horse rider

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i want to go riding again so bad

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but mum forgot

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its not her fault

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shes had alot on today

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im still so fucking sad

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im crying at the thought of it

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im ccrying

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don think abt it

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js dont

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dont

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think of something else

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it keeps poppping up

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put it away

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put the thought away

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i cant

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im crying

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i cant

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im crying

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if i go to jacaranda place i wnt be able to ride as much

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ill get worse

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i wont have any riding experiences

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ill be bad

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ill be bad

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i wont want to be bad

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i want to e good

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i want to be happy and good

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why am i so like fragile

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smallest thing sends me into a panic and like depression

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i notice everything that could even the slightest mean bad towards me

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and it makes me so upset

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that i cant bounce back like at all

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i dont know whats fucking wrong with me

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im so upset

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i want to go horse riding

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i want to be a good rider

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i want to be good

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im so fucking upset

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im so upset i cant like function

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i cant stop cryign

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every time i think about it

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i got in trouble

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im crying more

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im a disappoointment

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im a failure

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i shoulndt have asked for the food

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i wouldve eaten it

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but i cant know

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now

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ill throw up

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i shouldnt have told my mum i wasnt feeling goo and why

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because its made her feel bad

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whihc gets me in more trouble'

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i cant stop crying

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im so

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gone

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im so gone

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i dont want to eat i dont want to eat i dont want to eat

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i keep stoppung crying and then i think and it starts again

torn crag
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no

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no

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no

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no

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no

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no

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no

#

n

#

o

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im hyperventilating

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i cant do this

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i cant see

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i canyt dp this

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no

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no

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no

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nono

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mo

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no

#

o

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i cant gbreathe

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im gonna play star stable

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thaat wil make everything bretree

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i tuined everyrhing again

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i keep sending messages whne i say i wont

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its all my fault

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its all my fault

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its absoluteky all my fault

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im ruining everything

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i need to just leave her alone

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its ok

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i deleted it

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i dont think she saw

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so its ok

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itll be ok

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she will keep having fjn

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i can try and regulaye myself

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its ok

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nope

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she foesnt care

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and thats ok

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ill be ok by myself

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im gonna turn my phone off fully

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its ok

torn crag
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that means i was the only one having fun\

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i was proud of myself but i shouldnt have been bc i didnt even make her smile

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i have horrible luck

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she keeps saying its extra special because of me

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i dont understand why

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why is it more special w me

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what so good abt me

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i cant understand why

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ok so

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i think i figured it out

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ots not because its ME

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itd because im the girlfriend

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like

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its because im a girlfriend

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if IIII was js a friend then it wouldnt be special

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but if III was w girlfiend its special

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bc its not the me part

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its the having a girlfriend part

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that makes alot more sense

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i think bonnie hates me too

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she doesnt come in tom e anymroe

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she prefers my sister more

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i understand whybbut it still hurts

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i dont even have a dog anymore

torn crag
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im crying

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my brain cant give me a moment of peace

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i want to die

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or i want some sort of alcohol

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fucking unlucky my mum isnt an alcoholic

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if i reconnect w my dad i would have access to alcohol

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im so fucking

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whts wrong with me

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why am i so f

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why am i so ugly

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im so gross

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i dont believe her when she says im pretty

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its not true

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ive gained weight

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i feel so gross

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i am so gross

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why do the grams matter so much to me

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sgsatfgf

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im the latter

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im gonna stop eating fatty foods

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none

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ill only eat stuff w low calories and protein

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im cryung

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im so fucking gross

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im literally a chud

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im so gross

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i hate myself so much

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i want to disappear

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i hate being me i wnt to be literally anyone else

torn crag
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i want to sleep all day and never wake up

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i have no one and nothing

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i cant stop crying

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i hate myself so muh its unbearable

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its not true

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i dont believe it

torn crag
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im so useless

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im a horrible girlfriend

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i cant even rep’y to the simplest of stuff

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im ceying

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i lost mt appetite

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ive had chocolate and five crackers today and itd 1:34pm

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im so

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i want to fucking die

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i dont like being me

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i dont like being conscious

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im fuckinf useless

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i hate being me

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please

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anyone else wanna swap

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please

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i wish i wasnr safe

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i want a rucking blade

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please

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can someone like lend me one

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please

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was she lying

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why does no one like me

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no one trusst

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me

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everyone lies to me

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nothing is true

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i dont believe any of it

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i dont want to talk or see anyone dver again

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all everyone does is lie to me

torn crag
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i want to go back to sleep

torn crag
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im sad

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iwtsh

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its js made me like really sad

torn crag
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sad

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alone

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maybe ill meet someone at jacaranda place

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i washedy hair

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took two hours

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and my cut might be infected

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if it is infected i might have to go to the emergency department

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im gonna go into my tent so i can cry

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i dont have anyone

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bonnies making my bed for me

torn crag
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im very unfortunate looking

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thats the only way i can describe myself

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unfortunate looking

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i look like takeichi from no monger humzn

torn crag
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im so depressed tjat no one dants to taoj to me

torn crag
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i have no friends

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i have absolutely no one

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im trying not to cry because im in the car

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i will when i get home

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i went on a trail ride

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it was scary but still logs of fun

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i got so scared bc george was going so fast

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i màagadd to slow him down

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towards the end of the ride i was like actually gonna throw up it was so bad

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im ok now

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but i geniinely thpught i was going to theow up

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i think it was feom the heat and dehydration

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it was 2-3pm in queensland heat

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so very hot

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and i have pots so

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yummy fainting

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this helped distract me feom crying

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i think thats good

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i did’t het any pictures of george bc ppl i had met before had come for a ride w their mum

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i was so scared of them

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i could barely give george the rest of his treats i was so scared

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i did give tjem to him tho

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and i like kylie and i think she likes me so irs ok

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copper and patches pictures for anyone reading this because i miss copper

torn crag
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im so alone

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ive got nothing

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absolutely nothing

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im so sad

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im hust sad and lonely

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i got a full combo on my first try before

IMG_6003.png
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thats something good

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but rhe reaction wasnt good

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so i dont think its very impressive

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i got a coraline doll

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that makes me happy

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not happy enough tho

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maybe i should play star stable

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i hate myself

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im so

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gone

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im so gone

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6 hours

IMG_6008.png
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6 days i meant

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i have no one

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no one likes le

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no one wants to talk to me

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my psychiatrist said i was really fun znd nice to talk to but i think its only like for small talk

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just ok the surgace

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no one actually wants to become close w me im js like

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a filler

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for when theyre bored

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i cant even cry im so gone

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jacaranda place tomorrow

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i dont want to go

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i want to stay in my bed for the rest of my life

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i could be a good rider if i had any sense of confidence

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i want to fuckinf hzng myself

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sayori

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i have no one

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ashpwwnlhd

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i dont

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have anyon

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im making it difficult

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thats all i do in life

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its ok

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i donr want to andwer

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no u dont

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ur lying

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to me

torn crag
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am i toxuc

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i think im toxic

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i dont want that

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im being an abuser again

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im just

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a bad person

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oh

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thats what i am

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i am a bully

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im bullyinf her

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oh

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im

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a horrible person

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im

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horrible

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im bullying znd absuign her

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like i always have

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maybe everyone else can sense that im a horrible person

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and that is why no one likes or wants to ralk to me or be around me

torn crag
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i shouldnt have told her

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im so sorey

torn crag
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thats ok

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i think

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i think i fucked up her night

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i might be the reason she does that

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its ok

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as long as she gets joy from somewhere

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i think im ok w it

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im still sad i couldnt help

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but its ok

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ill be ok

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i think ill js sit in my sadness for a bit

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itll be ok

torn crag
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im on my way to javaranda place

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the dogs werz conginczd they were coming w us

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we had ro carry an fpush them back inside the house

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bonnie was sitting in the car gor 15 minutes

torn crag
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it manes me kind of sad

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because i dong have anyone

torn crag
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i think im gon’a cry

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i want to go home

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i dont want to be here

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i relaly dont want to be here

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i just want to go gome

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i dont want to be here

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i dont want her to know im not ok

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i dont want ro five her more to worry abt

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i need to blow my noss

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i want to fo home

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van my mym please pick me up

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i dont want to be here for theee months

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i just want to fo gome

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im tired and i want my bed

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i want my bed and my dogs

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and my safety

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i want to go gome

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i dont want to be here

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someone get me out of here please

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i thpight i could do this but i cant

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i dont wang to be here

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please someone

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get me pit of here

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i want to go home

torn crag
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im crying again

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i dont want to be alive

torn crag
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im sad

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and lonely

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i think im all alone

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i want to go home

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my hand is shaking so much

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like so muvch

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im shakibngg so much

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im crying

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so bad

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im so alone

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i have no one

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im shaking so much

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i cant be there for her im sorry

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i want to leave

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i dont want to do this

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i dont matter

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im crying

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im crying

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this is so much

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im in a fucking mental institution

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the other kids invited me to go watch a movie with them

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maybe that wouldve been better than this

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i couldve maybe made friends

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next time i will

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i dont like this

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im shaking so much and i cant get the tears out of my eyes

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lol no

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im scared

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im so scared

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im so fucking scared

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hah that one meme

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im so sacred

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im shaking so mmuhc

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not even my hands only now my whole body

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my head is shaking now too

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my entire body is shaknig

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my breath is shaky now

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im gonna stand up and walk around my room

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maybe that will help

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i did jellyous dance

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my legs were shaking

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i think im ok now

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i think

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my heart is beatig fast from it tho help

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ok back in my 'bed'

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this is my room

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is sigma

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i have alot of money on whi

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i need MORE tho

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my heart is still racing from that

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i want to go home

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she may be hiding from me

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but that is ok

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i understand

torn crag
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why is he like this

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why did he do that

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im so

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like almost disgusted

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why tf id he do that

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just why

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its so fucking gross

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and just plain mean

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why is he hurting someone i love and trying to include me in it

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HER of ALL PEOPLE

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im goung to tell her i refuse to keep anythingsecret from her

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but i hate that he has done this

torn crag
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fucking crying for the third time today

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i was gonna watch a movie and go to the park w my new friends but i think ive fucked everything up w parthena and i cant fukcing lesbe my room right now either

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i want to go home

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i want to go home

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i dont want to be here

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i want to go home

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it wôt eveb be home anymore

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i wont have my stuff

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ill be alone

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fucking done

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i dont want that fucking bitch to come î ahain

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LIAM

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HE SAID

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HE SAID THAT MIZ WAS PUTTING TOO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME

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DOEDNT HE

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FUCKING REALISE

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HOW MICH HE HIMSELF IS PUTTIN GON ME NOW

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IM FUCKING

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IM SO PISSED OFF

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AND FUCKÎG DONE

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IM SO FUCKING DONE

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I CANT DEAL W HIS SHIT

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ITS TOO FUCKING MUCJ

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I CANT DEAL WITH IT

torn crag
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i have screenshots

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alot just happened

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im

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i want to go home

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i want to see maggie

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i want to go home

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i cant tell who is gaslighting me

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liam says its mia

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but i trust mia more than him

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i dont think shes lying

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he said some really bad things about her

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i used to respect him so much and listen to everything he said

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because i thought he was really good

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and now idk

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im lkke

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i cant tell

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who is lying to me

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i know mia is telling the truth

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so it must be liam

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but what if liam is telling the truth

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he knows alot

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hes smart

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but he also never really liked that mia and i were dating

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and hes been really childish and doing weird shit

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idk

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im 14

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i shouldnt be dealing w ts

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am i in the wrong?

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what if i am

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what do i do if im in the wrong

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i apologised to him

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i really am sorry i wasnt good enough for him

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i tried so hard

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i listened to him

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i always made him fele better

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everytime he even the slightest wasnt included i woul always include him

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i always put him above me

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was i in the wrong despite all that?

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i cant tell

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i cant tell

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i want to go home

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i want to go home and see maggie

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i dont want to be in this new pllace

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i feel bad for charlie

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idk

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im

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i cant tell

torn crag
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i dont have anyone

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and im sabotaging myszlf

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i tried to talk in huddle geberal and people have onlt responded w like not very nice stuff

torn crag
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i shouodnt bave caught the cat

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im cryung

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its not alright

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im so sorry

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im horrible

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i stole the cat

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oh my god

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im horrible

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i stole the cat

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i shoudlnt ahve caught it

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i just probablh ruined everything

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any chance i had at making a new friend

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i ruined it bc i caught a fucking cat

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whats wrong with me

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i did the wrong thing

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its all my fault

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im horrible

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why do i keep fucking everything up

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its all my fault

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whats wrong with me

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why do i keep doing this

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i want to did

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i want to die

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i want to die

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i want to die

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i want to die

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i want to die

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im horrible

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im just a burden to everyone

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my mym and sister are so much happier without me

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bonnie is fine without me

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copper has regula

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mia has friends and a support system

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no one needs me

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i should dosappear

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never message anyone again

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im fucking horrible

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im crying

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im really crying

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im alone

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im so alone

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no one needs me

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im all alone

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im alone

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its all my fault

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its my fault im alone

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i did everyrhing

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i made the choices znd this is where i ended up

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its my fault

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its all my fault

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i fucked everything up

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i make everyone feel bad

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i make evzeyone feel bad and not good

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im the reason no one is happh

torn crag
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i dont actually have any problems

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its a lie

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its all a lie

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i have no joy

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why am i still alive

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i have no options on how to kill myself

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i can js stop eating

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i ate properly for the first time inna few days

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but i was still eating

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i need to js

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fucking stop

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so i can die

torn crag
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im crying

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if the answzr is no im not gonna be able to survive

torn crag
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i want to die i want to die i want to die

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drinking water makes me want to throw up

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i cant

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i want to fucking die

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i told her

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everything

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and she still wont fucking let me go

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i have no hop

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hope

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im going to dir

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i have no hope

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ive given up

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im crying because im drinking water

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i hate it so much

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im gonna did

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i hate water

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i want to throw ip

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its so gross

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im so

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i drank the whole water bottle

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i cant stay alive

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if i die my mum won't have to worry or be burnt out or traumatized anymore

torn crag
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i think im a manipukative bitch

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im so narcissistic

torn crag
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i fucked uo

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i fucked up again

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i need more messages to be said so i can delete that

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im sosorry jia

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i fucked up

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i shouldnt have sent that gif

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fuck

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i dont deserve to eat i keep ruining everyones times

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im glad sh has jia

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im sad i dont have anyone

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i never will

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i need to give up

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i keep being so fuk ing depressed

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im ruining her time

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she doesnt need someone who is never ok and is always depressed

torn crag
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i dont want to message her

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shes much better without me

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i thought i couldnt cry anymore

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i was wrong

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no u wont

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ur lying

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i dont beleive u

torn crag
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im scared

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im very scared

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i dont like this

torn crag
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im so lazy

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im such a fat fucking chud

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i want to cry im so upset

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i cant do anything and even if i wanted to idk what i would do

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im so fucking upset

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im so lazy

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i never do anything

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worst part is that im the problem

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not anyone else

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js me

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im trying not to cry

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what do i even do

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im so fucking upset

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im getting nowhere in my life

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im so

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i want to disappear

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i wont get better

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im not going to get better

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nothing can help me

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trying not to cryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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im so fucking useless

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my interests r shit

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no one likes them

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or hearing abt them

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i need to stop talking abt them

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no one cares

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would star stable make me feel better

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idek atp

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i want it to

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i want something to

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im so

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gone

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im so gonoe

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maybe star stable is a good thing

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its all a lie

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no one is telling me the truth

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i dont believe it

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im such a fat fucking chud

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i need to stop eating

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if i stop eating i get stuff i love taken away from me

torn crag
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i think she doesnt want to talk to me

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thats okay

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ill wait for her

torn crag
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does she hate me

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or is it a bit

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i cant tell

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i cant tell

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does she hate me

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have i done something

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i thought i was perfect

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i try so hard

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to be perfect for everyone

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no dinner for meeeeeee

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i dont mind if she messages someone else who can match her energy

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im not gonna get better

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she needs someone better

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i donnt actually have any problems or reaosn to be like this either

torn crag
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i js dont have any good like memories

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like there was never a name i really wanted either

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i hate my name

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its so gross

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im not amounting to anything

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i know i say it alot

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but i just cant do anything

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theres nothing impressive inmy life

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why did i wonder that

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maybbe i shouldve oded younger is my thought process ig?

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idk

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its icky

torn crag
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i think it makes me feel kind of sad bc its lke im not good enoough and i havent dne good enough

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and definately envious

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like i wish i had good interests

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and i had done so much more

torn crag
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im so fucking

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fucking ew

torn crag
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it is my fault

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i ruined everything

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i ruined both of our nights

torn crag
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!rank

fleet wyvernBOT
torn crag
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i want to be pink

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give me pink

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tarararararararra

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what if i js spam this

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will that get me up kevels

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i wish i could pay robux to go up levels

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i want to play my horsi game

torn crag
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what is my problem

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i feel weird

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and not in the good way

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ok

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i feel

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shame

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jealousy

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sadness

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and guilt

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thats what im feeling

torn crag
torn crag
torn crag
torn crag
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pain

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im

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gross

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i keep trying to make friends and no one actually likes meor wants tobe my friend

#

i joined a new server tho so maybe i can make friends there

#

they seem pretty nice

#

it still makes me upset tho

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bc i dont have anyone

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and im not succeeding

#

maybe

#

wsgicdmle

#

i think i will do that

torn crag
#

which is gross

#

i shouldnt feel like that

#

why does it cover and center over all of my thoughts

#

how do i get more sertraline so i can overdose

#

i dont want to answer

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i feel bad but idrtph

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i want to

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stop feeling

#

im probably going to become an alcoholic or a drug addict

#

i dont think theres an option out there for me to not

#

anything to cope ig

#

i should go to mountain islnd i think

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why do i feel like this

#

why do i do this

#

i dont want to step up

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but i need to

#

im stepping up again im pissed now

torn crag
#

my sister put the remote in my hand and now my hand feels weird and gros

#

i hope my mum will let me have more roblox time

#

my sister keeps tiuching me

#

i feel so gross now

#

i already showered today too

#

i cant move my leg bc my puppys on it too

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so i cant wipe the feeling of my sisters hair off it

torn crag
#

i didnt do my excercises

#

im a lazy fucking fatass

#

dumb fucking chud

#

my mum js told me u can die from being in a refridgerator

#

thats an option

#

im gonna do my excercises so i can feel better

#

i shouod’t have eaten donner

#

its too late to throw it up now too

#

tomorrow i wont

torn crag
#

i dont believe it

torn crag
#

eugh

#

im a bad rider

#

like

#

really bad

#

im not a good hprse rider at all

#

im fucking dog shit

#

yay

torn crag
#

i dont have anything interesting about me

#

like i dont know how to do conversations

#

im not like

#

interesting

#

im just

#

existing

#

and thatd it

torn crag
#

eug

#

i can go to illit server

#

i can maybe make some friends there

#

i think people just dong like me

#

i messaged illit server and the entire chat went silent

#

sadness

#

i can play my poni game

#

i wanted to do paperxraft but i lost motivation

#

now im js sitting on my phone sad

#

i want it to be 12 o clock

#

i want to do lego w merlin

#

maybe we can get bubble tea too

#

my puppy is dreaming

#

why am i so sad

#

nothings making me happy

#

how do i be happy

#

am i js gonna be depressed for the next two hours

#

theres no place for me

#

im not anywhere

#

maybe i should js go read my depressing book

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yozo 🤝 me

#

(minus sexism

#

that bits nasty

#

but other than that we r twins

#

im so fuxking

#

empty

#

let me disappear

#

gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone gone

#

im gonna play poni game

#

maybe it will make me feel better

#

it doesnt make me feel better unless im on my laptop but i want to save my laptop time for pony game w her

#

i have pink fluffy blanket atleast

#

run blanket run

#

ok

#

go

#

poni game

#

feel better

#

fo something that will help u

#

go

torn crag
#

dr jiwon made me feel better

#

and now im listening to kpop ggs to keep me happy

#

thus was the board

#

hes the one thats closer to empathy and im the one closer to sympathy

#

ok so

#

empathy is being able to read other peoples emotions and sympathy is FEELING others emotions

#

im super shy super shy

#

i need to protect my good mood

#

bro ifk where merlin is going

#

U DONT EVEN KNOW MY NAME DO UUUUUUUUUU

#

U DONT EVEN KNOW MY NAME DO UUUUUUUUUUU

#

shes tryna go to gyg but is failing horribly HELP

#

i love girl groups

#

they make the best songs

#

im getting better

#

i need to get even more better

#

i love 3rd 4th and 5th gen ggs

#

ONE LOOK GIVE EM WHIPLASH

#

WAIT YEAH NO I DID THAT DAY ONE NO I BEEN BAD

#

IN MYYY DREAMS U LOVEEE MEEEE BACKKKKKKKKKKK

#

ITS SO PEAK

#

protect

#

protect

#

protecg

#

keep breathing

#

wonhee car

#

STOP I LOVE THE HIGH NOTES

#

i cant message her

#

shes not feeling good

#

she doesnt want to hear from me

#

so im going to spam this HELP

#

OMG IFEYE CAME ON

#

merlin got her gyg

#

OMG THERES A PONY ON THE ALBUM COVER

IMG_6181.png
#

im sweating sm its so hot and i dont have my water bottle

#

merlin has gyg atleast tho

#

im saying the wrong things

#

i dont know how to stop

#

i want to disappear

#

im ruining everytjing

torn crag
#

GUYSSSSSSSSSSS

#

I MADE FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#

IM SO EXCITED

#

im worried abt her tho

#

shes been gone for 30 minutes

#

and she might be in alot of trouble

#

i hope shes ok

torn crag
#

GUYS IM SO HAPPI 😭

image.png
#

PEOPLE LIKE ME

torn crag
#

ok

#

shes safe

#

i can relax now

#

dr jiwon was right bro i need to stop being sympathetic

#

im always wrong

torn crag
#

it makes me kind of sad

torn crag
#

!rank

fleet wyvernBOT
torn crag
#

heart attacj by chuu peak

#

people are nice

#

why do people like le

#

its a genuine quesyion

#

i dont understand why

#

ok

#

im gonna say ut

#

i think her thing truggers me

#

and makes me more insecure and upset

#

so im gonna try and ignorz it and talk abt it w maggie

#

and get better and accept it

#

so i can support her

#

i saw the message and wanted to cry

#

but im ok niw

#

merlins gonna be w me until 5 i think😭😭😭

#

ill ask mum if i can have a sleepover tho

#

hopefully it will be a yes becaus eive been doing so much

#

also my headphones werz on 20 percent at 9:30am this morning and they just went flat now at 2:35pm

#

and i was using them nonstop all day

#

so props to my headphones

torn crag
#

i hate my stomach

#

and my arms

#

and my cheeks

#

and my legs

#

theyre all so gross

#

but i hate my stomach the most

#

ist so

#

icky

#

i hate looking at it

#

i hat looking at myself

#

im so gross

#

i hate myself

#

i dont want to face anyone

#

im so gross

#

i failed

#

at everything

#

im such a pain

#

i made her not feel good

torn crag
#

i do believe her

#

but i think im still not gonna talk abt it

#

or atleast try to

#

bc she doesnt need it

#

and also its js negativty

#

and i dont want the chance for it to be affecting it to even exist

torn crag
#

lwokey maybe should i stop trying

#

i think i should

#

idk

#

i cant ever follow through

#

im giving up

#

i should do dancing

#

maybe that will helo

#

im fonna disappear

#

bye guys

torn crag
#

idek

#

idk what to do

#

minsung frfr

#

ive fuckinf ruined everything

#

i always do

#

dr jiwon wzs roght

#

im making jer worse

#

im gucking

#

ruining everything

#

idk what to do

#

im just going to cry

#

no gifs yet

#

love, older you

#

i need to be older

#

so i can do that for myself

#

i want to be older

#

so i can tell my younger (current) self that its gonna be ik

#

bc theres no proof roght now

#

theres no proof ill make it to 16

#

two years away but still

#

theres no proof ill make it to 15

#

or atleast if i do i will live an actual life