Gotta birthday twin here
#Night's café
knotty galleon
knotty galleon
Love my therapist I've seen for 9 years!! Love my supportive mom y my velcro pupperoni. Only this year was I able to open up about my trauma, what I know of what happened. Without crying. Now I'm at the part where I have the most trouble about the person who caused it.(it was unintentional) But I now know he went to the hospital for me y my brother.. I never knew that. I never knew he felt remorse for what happened. I also know why he just up y left after what happened.. so.. I can't say he came into my life y fucked it up.. bc him y mom had a falling out.. it just happened after everything. I still can't talk about him.. I still can't hear his name Without breaking down y crying. But Im working on it.
Alessia's comfort spot
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Umm.. I guess I'm sad rn bc I play this game "cat game".. you collect floors of different themes with cats. I was/am till the end of this event.. still in my club. We've been going for a couple years now. We've been on the leader boards, top 15 sometimes 20 before. But in the top 30s mostly. But we started struggling. We are a competitive club*. But like I said, we started to struggle..y now after years of successful events.. We're disbanding 
... I am really sad about it..
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I should be sleeping but I'm making friends!!! 
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Upset right now
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Tw: self harm
|| I feel defeated again.. I don't understand why some things upset me... to the point where I need a different kind of pain to numb everything else||
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Having a movie day for comfort. The haunted mansion y hocus pocus
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when you say that you love me, I walk above the clouds. Tell me about forever, just one more time.
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Very overwhelmed 
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Me when I get my hands of bts tickets 2025
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I had a nice nap
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Getting over a fever
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Bored ..so bored
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Making tacos!!!! 🌮🌮
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Still love this piece. A friend on another server made this for me when I lost one of my babies. Anna is looking down on pumpkin now. 🎃 🍌
My Anna banana y pumpky wumpky chunky
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Today's food
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I can only take so much, before I snap....
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Boop the snoot
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Side eyeing these mods y admins y shit..👀
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Mila is on another level 
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In the mood for Ryan's.. a better version of golden corral... but they don't exist anymore
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Now I want Blaze pizza🍕 ...
The American in me says pizza
But the Mexican says picxa😭
Bestie core
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New nickname achieved unlocked
~
Awesome Alessia 
knotty galleon
Stellina's Escape
Stellinas Escape
New name, why not😌
Also got some cold coffee ☕️ ☕️ ☕️
knotty galleon
I just love my hair though!!
Reasons to live: BTS 2025
🎶 *And thats why night after night, ill be fuxking you right!! Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday! A week! Monday,Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday! Seven days a week! Every hour, every minute, every second! You know night after night, I'll be fuxking you right! SEVEN DAYS A WEEK!!*🎶
Random drawings
Some lounges here are either boring as hell or toxic or triggering or plain dumb
Glad to have the few friends I did make💜
knotty galleon
When people read
"My comfort person is rubbing it in my face, that he has fried chicken legs" do people read it as "rubbing the actual chicken leg ON my face" ??? Asking for a friend..
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Saw the scary car.. immediately freaked out. Cried y hyperventilated.. think I hurt mom's hand squeezing it so hard.. 
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Feeling better. Saw my comfort person 
he means the world to me.
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¡Lo siento! Eso fue grosero de mi parte jajaja. Ni siquiera conozco a la persona.
knotty galleon
🎶So if you're ready🎶
🎶And if you let me🎶
🎶I wanna see it, in motion, in 3D🎶
🎶You won't regret me🎶
🎶Campaign confetti🎶
🎶I wanna see it, in motion, in 3D🎶
My headache went away. Couldn't sleep when I had it, so I stayed up. Enjoying my me time.
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..... over thinking now... just wish what could have been... happened...
I was fine now I'm not. What the fuck!!!
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Poured my heart out.. Mila doesn't know how much i appreciate her.. she barely said anything but she listened y gave me a teddy hug.. 🧸 told her something I've kept from a lot of people y I broke down.. but then I told her the reason I call my comfort person 'my comfort person'. Y it made me feel better.. there's a lot of ups y downs to some personal stuff with my life.. but I have to remember I still have the ones I love in my life. My comfort person 
y that even though I don't believe in the 'things happen for a reason' I believe that God keeps those who love me in my life. As he kept me in others lives. 
knotty galleon
MY BESTIE MILA
~
Sharing is friendship
Moon & Sun are best of friends
They take turns to shine
~
~
To Mila:
I know we haven't been friends for all, but I feel like we've been friends for forever. I adore you y you are so kind. It's always a pleasure in getting to talk with you! You are funny, smart, y very sweet. Giving me all the huddler hugs y all the super reacts! We have our own jokes y memes, but I couldn't have asked for a better friend! You care so much y we've shared a lot of ups y downs. But I can't be a nuggie without my fry!! Like two peas in a pod! You are more than what you think you are, you are the most helpful person I know. You may think of yourself as not much help when you can't give advice. But what you don't know is how great of a listener you are! How great of a poet you are! How great of a friend you are! I couldn't tell you enough how much I appreciate you you are an amazing friend 
knotty galleon
In love with Eternal Nocturnal 💕 if you're not reading it on webtoon, what are you doing??!!!
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Note to self.. NEVER FUCKING UNINSTALL SOMETHING YOU DONT HAVE ANY OTHER WAY TO GET BACK INTO WITHOUT A PHONE NUMBER YOU CANT USE BECAUSE YOUR PHONE IS OFF!!!!!!
Can't even talk to my comfort person now..
Can't tell him the problem, so he doesn't think I'm ignoring him
Can't get this fixed till mom gets off work
After 3 pm!
He doesn't use anything except messenger y his phone number
I DONT HAVE A WORKING PHONE
& NOW I DONT HAVE MESSENGER!!!!!
It has my account
BUT IT WONT LET ME IN
HELLA PISSED OFF I DID THAT
HELLA PISSED OFF MY PHONE IS OFF
I can't function without talking to him
So I refuse to talk to anyone else today
knotty galleon
....
I got back in.
Dunno how
But I'm in
Had a little melt down. I can talk to my comfort person now. Obviously he's at work so not often rn..
But I'll get to talk to him later
Ugh
This was one hell of a roller-coaster
knotty galleon
One thing after another today. Poor Anna left this world end of May. Now Cali is gone. But at least Anna has fatboy y batman. Cali has baby... 
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A down: Upset my friend
A up: got Jungkooks album
Why's today ups y downs for me
A down: lost the ability to use messenger
A up: got it back
A down: Cali ( my comfort person's mom's cat) passed away yesterday. Found out today
A up: I get to see my comfort person this weekend
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Just something to get to know me!!!
Just some picrew things I made. Me y My comfort person. Pumpky y Anna
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Bleeb 
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Bc I was bored
Lol
But like I rarely take pics.
No: of selfies in my gallery. Maybe 8??
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Random doodles
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내가 찾은 이 기능이 마음에 들었습니다.
정국이 최고야
호박
LOL I LOVE THIS FEATURE!!
Saying random things
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Woke up from a nap. Unhappy
But I always have pumpky there for me
Shower 🚿 😶🌫️ y food
🫔 now
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Ugh I don't think before I speak sometimes I need to watch what I say, so I don't upset others
Many apologies
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Umm. We all good. Misstep
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New ideas 
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Hoping for the best for my friends. Struggling or not. I care💜
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had me some doughnuts
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Got to talk to my comfort person on the phone 
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.......when will I ever get a break!?!?!?!?
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late night drawing
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LOL the shit I wake up to😂😂😂 my comfort person is hilarious sometimes
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Realizing I might have Co-dependency
My comfort person gives me happiness
But I cannot find happiness without him
For myself, within myself
♪oﾟﾟooﾟﾟo♪
Just something random. I think I knew this a few months now
*☆ﾟﾟﾟﾟ *♪
Now time to tell my therapist
knotty galleon
★☆♪A tattoo idea♪☆★
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hung out with my favorite person
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Rain makes me unhappy sometimes... it's cold y wet y gives me flashbacks
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Feeling accomplished today. Been cleaning a lot of the house to help mom out. I did good. 
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WOAH!! I so happy right now. To finally forgive the person who unintentionally caused my trauma.... feels so freeing... I'm so happy
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Got into the car while it was raining. Which is a big trigger. Me cars y rain don't mix. But mom said it was for exposure..I guess I did it...
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Not a great day today. Tomorrow will be a new day...hopefully
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Pumpky has been acting weird lately...
Super clingy for some odd reason y whining more than usual...
This isn't her.. she doesn't seem sick but it's worrying me
Hopefully she'll be back to normal soon
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Got gifted nitro. For the 4th time ever
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Gotta pain in my chest. 
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In a bad place.... contemplating suicide... y I don't want help...... I don't want help.... I want to never wake up
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I'm better now
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Just some drawings
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More art....
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January 16th is my grandmother's birthday. Ik it passed but I'm really missing her 
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Mi corazón
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Crying myself to sleep tonight
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I'm not.. saying anything... I'm okay right now but..
If I ever lose my battle to my mental health.
Know that I fought, know that I tried.
And know that I'm so grateful I spent my time with you. ❤️🩹
knotty galleon
HOW CAN I TRUST OTHERS TO HELP WHEN THEY CUSS DURING THE APPOINTMENT?!?!?!
Don't fucking lie to me
How unprofessional
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WOOOOOOHHOOOOO !!!!!!!
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Just finished taking the practice test for the drivers license. I just worte down the correct answers to the questions
Ima get the 2024 cheat sheet with 150 questions y study that though
99.2% of people pass the first time using the cheat sheet
knotty galleon
Just pumpky y anna
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I keep getting gifted nitro.. aha I love it
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MODS ARE FUCKING FUNNY HERE.. why isn't there a team with the original app... why is the mods random people that don't even know how to do their jobs... don't fucking mess with my bestie y turn around y let SO MANY OTHERS get away with shit. Favoritism doesn't suit any of you well......
Bitches
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Scared of the future...
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Please end the suffering now...
I'm tired
Been crying y crying...
I just want it all to end
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I'm feeling somewhat better
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My comfort persons dogs. Bobo (black), Buddy (brown), y Leo (white)..... tonight Buddy took his final breath 
rest easy Buddy
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Headache hurtssssss
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Vc'ed my bestie today
Sunny y warm today
It was a nice day
knotty galleon
╰─ ⋆.˚✰ About me:
| Name: Night/Stellina
| Age: 27
| Birthday: 12-26
| Zodiac: Capricorn
| MBTI: ISFP-T
⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ˚☽˚.⋆
╰─ ⋆.˚✰ My Favorite...
| Food: Authentic Mexican,
| Drink: Iced Coffee, Mexican cola
| Animal: Dogs/Horses
| Season: Summer
| Color: Blue/Purple
| Songs: Best of Me
| Artists: BTS 
| Games: Animal Crossing pocket camp, Pokemon Go, Cat Game, Cookierun Kingdom
⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ˚☽˚.⋆
╰─ ⋆.˚✰ Interests & More!
| Hobbies: Drawing, napping, listening to music, cuddling
| Likes: BTS, Coffee, pitbulls, napping, the beach
| Dislikes: Cars, Rain, inconsiderate people, people in general
⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ˚☽˚.⋆
╰─ ⋆.˚✰ My Bestie: 
Mila
knotty galleon
My bestie is the best
So glad I can call her my bestie
We're ride or die at this point 
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I just want my bestie to be okay. I feel like it's all bc of me. Bc it started with me.. 
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I'm feeling better. Talking to my bestie helps a lot. 
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Aha gotta love sibling rivalries
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I'll probably never get sliver journal. But my sis did that
Welllll... it freaking said she did. So ima say she did^^
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Watching my 2nd BangBangCon!!! Super happy. Ofc it's from 11pm to 6am. But fuck it. I'm here for it!!!!
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Happy birthday to my comfort person. I love him so much y I'm happy to have him in my life. 
knotty galleon
Not sure where to even begin... just finished crying... ugh
...just.. knowing I never really had a father figure in my life.. I never had a dad.. it makes me feel if some other man came into my mom's life.. would I resent him too? Dad hit me in the face once... he put me y my siblings on the back burner... we meant nothing to him..... the.. 2nd father figure...he's the reason for my trauma.. but looking back.. even if he wasn't like dad.. he wasn't there either... always working... I hate the thought of being hurt again.. I hate the thought of another male in my life.. to be a father... being ruined..again y again...
.......My mom is my mom y my mom was also my dad.... she played both roles......
It only caused crying when the one who caused the trauma came up
Bc even if I forgave him recently
It still stings
Hurts..
So much
I'm unhappy with remembering
I don't want to resent anyone... but how can I trust anyone..
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Can't say I didn't feel motivated last night. Got some lists done..
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Ugh I feel so sick rn
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Cleaned my room but got sick bc of the dust..... ugh
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Not too happy to hear a deer hit my brother's girlfriends car tonight
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I wish I had made something for my mom's birthday tomorrow 
Still happy I have a mom
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Gonna try y clean like hell today. Gotta stay up so I can sleep tonight lol. Need to get my days n nights on track
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Well back to being not okay y unhappy...
Wow.. funny how fast suicidal thoughts pop up...
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Guess I'm okay. For now.....Though I still need a break
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TIME TO START RETAKING MY PRACTICE TESTS FOR THE DIVERS TEST
It's in four weeks!!!
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New test, though they all look the same. But 💯
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Whelp.... back to wanting to commit suicide...... fml
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I am fine
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I just don't know anymore...
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Great..... I relapsed.... now there's blood on my wrist
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Crying my ||fucking|| eyes out...like I did last night.. like.. I feel like I'm being pressured into driving.. I don't feel comfortable with all this....I'm only doing this for those in my personal life.. I don't want this nor did I ever want this.. *it took me 15 ||fucking|| years to even forgive the man who caused it..... it could take me 15 more to get over the car part!!!!!!!! I feel like everyone's so worried about me learning to drive that they forget how much I fear the thought or driving... of that I have ||fucking|| trauma... mom's so worried I might not have someone to drive me places one day, the person I love the most... called me a brick wall... everyone else says I need to do it. I have to do it. But like... the written test is one thing.. the driving test is a whole thing else...I'll never be in the right state of mind to ever get on a road period... I feel like I'm being set up to fail... bc I fear I'll inevitably cause something... I get it's the ptsd y anxiety but.. still... I'm crying bc I feel like it's at the cost of my comfort... I'm trying to please others.. I'm trying to make others happy.. when at the end of the day... they'll only be happy with what they wanted out of me... I don't think this is a good idea... I'm terrified.. I don't think.. if I pass or not.. that I'll try for a license..I can't do it.. it's too scary for me... y now I just feel like a failure...I'm scared of letting everyone down.. or disappointing everyone..
Why the hell... would you put a person with an MVA caused trauma behind the wheel of a car....?
I get there are people with the same trauma who has not been in a car since their trauma...where as I have.. y I get that some have learned to drive...
Why can't I just be a passenger y everyone be okay with that??
knotty galleon
Much needed treat
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Well.... I'm ready for life to be over.... I hate my life...
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||....nothing is stopping me.. but to see what will come from what I'm waiting for... I'm already in a lot of pain that's never went away.. I feel the need now to shut down y distance myself from people.. bc why stay close if I have a plan...||
||I know I've cut into my skin far enough before. That if I go under my thumb... y cut the same length..I can successfully cut my radial artery... I should be unconscious in 30 seconds y gone by 2 minutes..... now it's a waiting game... what will push me over the edge. I've been close to trying.. but I've been a coward.......||
This is all I want.....
I've accepted that I'll hurt people
I honestly don't care anymore
Why must I suffer by staying alive?
knotty galleon
Lol can't answer simple questions...okay
If the answer is gonna be a bullshit- oh to make things simple to read.. why not say it. Shouldn't have to "contact" you or another mod to ask that... to get the same answer
knotty galleon
Aha jaja I came back... not for anything really.. just to see. Funny the server is still up y not deleted even though it's dead. Feel free from anyone who made me feel uncomfortable by always comparing me to others.
Shit happens
Nefeli's return
Nefeli
knotty galleon
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Night's café
knotty galleon
Dunno what to post really. Life's been a roller-coaster...my God...
• Family drama
• having to cut people outta my life bc of how overwhelming they became, y making everything so negative/ about them, y comparing me to people
funny how they mentioned someone else that did the same thing.... I wasn't comparing her to him.. it's just you both compared me to not so great people in your personal life that I was nothing like/comparing my past relationship to his when he was a problem for his y mine never had any problems like his
Glad those two are outta my life
Sucks... but it is what it is
• just been sick or tired so much
• always one thing after another
knotty galleon
Crying my ||fucking|| eyes out...like I did last night.. like.. I feel like I'm...
This whole thing.... nah... I don't think I really forgave him
Bc I still have so much trouble....
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my favorite person is getting me a Cooky pillow!!!
Lost in my thoughts rn though...
I think it's bc I'm not sure what to do.... as in boredom..
Better than being miserable 
knotty galleon
Aha felt I wasted my time making friends outside of the cat game server.. from here on out I refuse to talk to anyone else...
I won't be compared, I won't stand for so much negativity, or people making everything about them. Nor do I fuck with Narcissistic people
... I put too much trust into some. How stupid of me..
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.... I just don't know how to tell people no sometimes
Now I'm stuck... bc I said it before I won't fuck with anyone else outside the cat game server....
But maybe a week ago this person came to me... y we started chatting
I'm not one for lack of communication...so obviously I unfriended this person..
But now they're back....
Y I feel bad for lying to them about why I unfriended...
But it is what it is
I just need to cut contact now. I don't want to get hurt again
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Since when were people allowed to write I another persons journal.....
Even though it gives you that ability..... you shouldn't omg😩
Our journals are for OP to write in... only for people to read y react
That's crazy
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Omg why do I keep seeing others writing in journals that aren't theirs
Isn't there a rule that states to write in your own?????
I guess it's no big deal.
But still
knotty galleon
So if anyone ever goes up to read... a name I mentioned many times is no more... one of the ones I had to cut contact with
I only say it bc I'm not fond of deleting a lot... but.. that person is in quite a few posts
It's unfortunate
But oh well
knotty galleon
Fuck... my health went down hill. Think I have a fever..I keep shivering uncontrollably.. y I'm extremely sore.. wth???
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Great... I have covid
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Still sick but I'm not feeling as bad.. I'll be good Thursday.
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Mom now has rolled her ankle 
wtf universe
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Think ima leave this server again. I dislike it how I disliked it before.... I'm not active anyway... but I guess my journal will still be here if I ever decide to come back.
knotty galleon
...I keep coming back.... omg the hell I've been through this month
April is the worst month.. ... I was already struggling...the 28th this year marks 17 years since my trauma..that caused my ptsd.... but it got so much worse... so much... 
On the 11th.... I was doing whatever in my room..when I heard my bro screaming..It didn't register until he came to my room in distress...showing me his phone.. something I've never wanted to see.. ( in general I will never want to see that someone I love y care for get into an MVA )......
but.. as I read... his gf of some years..though they were on a break at the time... .. was killed in an MVA......I lost my shit screaming y crying.... nothing could have ever prepared me... bc she was family... she was the sweetest person alive.. I was literally killed hearing she was gone... I'm still struggling...I can't come to terms with it or accept what happened ..... all the more reason to hate April... I'm hurt... I went to her service...it killed me to see her body in the casket... ik it wasn't her bc her spirit was no longer in her body... but it hurt... it still does........ I hated leaving her where she was laid to rest... I still cry for her... I miss her so much.. she was really a sweet person.. she cared so hard y always always smiled.. I never saw a frown on her face... I remember a few weeks before it all.... she came by to do something... she told me y mom she loved us y we told her we loved her... I told her to be safe.. as I always tell people when they drive...... but.. she's gone.. ..... I wish she had a chance.. but it was instant...I wish it never happened...it wasn't supposed to be her....
knotty galleon
I did a good deed today!!!
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Kinda wanna start a fresh journal but I'm unsure...
Don't think many people even see my journal much as when this server was more active before the whole shutdown..
But for the few who I guess do read.. should a start fresh??
yess noo
I'll definitely wait a while to see how many would or will even help me out with deciding..
Idk.. I wanna keep this one but I hate looking back at the reactions... the few people who reacted before I no long speak to bc we've drifted apart y I do miss them but it hurts to look at... then there's one person I hate seeing the reactions from now since our friendship fell off bc of how they turned out..always so negative... always comparing me.. I couldn't even have something between me y another friend without her getting jealous...
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... still waiting on the day I crash out...... like I have a plan that's 100% successful but I keep backing out..... idk why.. I don't feel like I have a purpose.. I'm just doing things people need help with... but at the end of the day I'll be alone y always in need of help y having to rely on others........ I keep coming so close... to ending things to fucking talk myself into waiting.. for whatever reason I choose... "oh I'll wait till I can see my comfort person again" "oh I'll wait till this date passes bc of this" ..... but... why.. 1,000% I still feel like I have no reason to be here... plus I've already accepted I'll hurt people y as fucked up as that sounds.... it makes things easier for me to want to do it...
Rn the thing that's holding me back is the fact Friday I have tgt my nieces school for mothers day so she has someone there for her....
The thought of not being able to see or hear my comfort person stops me... but.. it's starting to not be that way
Leaving my dog.. kills me.. but.... idk what to do.. I would see her again though..
Mothers day is coming up.... that stops me
My comfort person's birthday is in June......
Idk when is a time to do anything
I won't dare open my mouth to anyone irl... I won't be sent away... those places don't even help....
I don't want to have to wait weeks but there's no good time now...
Talking won't help... I'll just feel this way again...
knotty galleon
Ugh... the stress I'll be under until some bitch gets her ass some place to stay🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
But I did get a few yeses.. so I'll definitely start a new journal!!
knotty galleon
Well my day is ruined. Was gonna start the new journal... I've play mobile games before y I've had good times when I would find a community. Tiny farm was the first. Had a club y everything. Was friends with the top players.. then.. the game died.. it has been years... but they brought it back this late last year.. but it's not the same. So I lost the friends I made there... then animal crossing pocket camp...up for 7 years. Made friends for the game to just.. get rid of internet connection.....there's animal crossing complete..but I lost those friends as well...
2019 I found this game about collecting cats. Dogs are more my thing but still.. I got into to it. I've been through not knowing how to play events, to getting into clubs that didn't know what to do. Finding this club that got me into the swing of things. I found my forever home with Aspiring axolotls.
We were top 15 for months... but then the club broke up.... I was then introduced to a server for the game for all clubs that were involved.. I made new friends, had great times, found new things to do.. I got into another amazing club. That also had an army in it. ....but as of today... my fear of losing another amazing community y friends is coming back. As of today the game is shutting down..... there are hopes it'll come back...but we kinda saw it coming whenever old events started to be replayed...... I'm extremely lost for words. My emotions are high. Everyone other on that server is upset as well.... I'm scared to lose them all...I'm just so upset
knotty galleon
I don't have too many followers here. But started my new journal!! Hope I'll gain a little following. New journal is called vibing with Night hope to see some new / old peeps there
knotty galleon
knotty galleon
Um
So wth??
I can talk here but not in my new journal?!
Nvm I guess I wasn't allowed to use a little freaking thingy?? Wtevr
knotty galleon
On the 11th.... I was doing whatever in my room..when I heard my bro screaming.....
I still look back.... reading this.. it's so painful... never did i ever imagine losing someone like this
knotty galleon
I didn't want to put this in my new journal... been thinking about someone on discord... it's been awhile since we've talked.. a year.. i.. really wanna talk again but he had ignored my last txt..over a year ago.. so I've had anxiety about even saying anything...bc I did unfortunately do him wrong.... though he forgave me.. I wonder if he decided to not fuck with me y didnt really forgive me or was it bc he had stuff going on in his personal life? Bc he did mention his parents were divorcing...... it feels weird... I just think if I tried to say anything...idek what to say.. it would either be ignored or id get block? Or he would respond but it would be to ask me to leave him alone??? Ofc I could be wrong but I really think he would just ignore me ..
Ik he's on the east cost like me so it's way too early to send anything.... I got so much jitters rn...
anxiety
I still hate how I wronged him...... I'm not that type of person so for me to actually do what I did... I can't even believe it... it's not as bad as it sounds but it was wrong...
God why am I shaking..... I think i just wanna know what I'll get outta trying to talk again... good or bad.. I'd know
I guess I'll say something now. Eventually he'll see it y if it goes unanswered for at least a week... then ik he doesn't want anything to do with me... which i don't blame him.. maybe he never did really forgive me or he just isn't interested in being a friend...
Nvm... I tried but got the error that I wasn't in the same server/ only accepts dms from friends..but i tried to friend him... it didnt let me... I guess I am blocked
It does make me sad.... but i still don't blame him.. y I'm not gonna try to get in contact by making an alt... he clearly doesn't want to be friends... but I guess since ik now.. I'll deal with it... oh well... I do kinda miss him
The anxiety passed.... still sucks..
knotty galleon
Ugh now I wish I could at least have someone tell him i hope he's doing well.........
But I think it would be taken as annoying
To him
I also feel wrong for trying to look for him outside of discord... since ik his full real name.... that's over stepping y pushing boundaries....besides even if i did find him how could I even make it look like I just stumbled upon him...
That's going to far so I'm glad i didn't find him bc I think i would've definitely tried to say something
I just need to move on
knotty galleon
Been a roller-coaster.... still is.. I can't seem to stand much anymore.. I just hate people.. y situations..
Toxicidad
knotty galleon
Just crashed tf out.. I've never punched a wall in my entire lifetime whenever getting upset... but tonight I hit my limit.. I punched the wall y ofc got hurt from it.. then I swear on my life I was gonna end my life.. but I waited too long.. so ofc the anger is.. gone to say the least.. I swear I dont want to be here anymore but without anger I have nothing to fuel myself to do anything....
I feel like I have no family
knotty galleon
...........
Ik i said what i said.... but everything is just so stressful... but that doesn't excuse some people's actions... im still.. very unhappy y upset...... idk anymore
knotty galleon
Just wanna remind whoever that I have a new journal!! 
