#PDA (Pathological demand avoidance)

1 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

remote nebula
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Over the past months I’ve encountered the term “PDA”. It’s considered a sub-diagnosis to autism. It differ from autism in the ways that people with PDA tend to have an easier time with role play and surprises than people with “just” autism.

I think I can relate a lot to the PDA diagnosis. Yesterday my parents sent a message about an event in town. It felt as if I were supposed to go there and it freaked me out. I went into break down and they didn’t even say anything about it.

Small demands makes me really anxious. Meanwhile I heavily rely on preparing stuff in advance which isn’t typical for PDA.

Where I live PDA isn’t an official diagnosis yet. There isn’t much information about it either.

I wonder if there is any people here who have a PDA diagnosis or who have read much about it and can relate in the way I do. It would also be interesting if anyone who is highly sensitive to demands would like to share what it’s like and how you accommodate for yourself.

(PDA and sensitivity to demands isn’t the same thing, just to be clear blob_thumbs_up )

modern perch
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apparently PDA is very controversial and isn’t as accepted in the tiktok autistic community

reef berryBOT
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GG @modern perch, you just advanced to level 3!

modern perch
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some discourse happened months ago i can’t remember the full details but i’ll get back to you when i find it

loud light
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Dealt with it most of my life, if others ask me to do things I will feel forced and start feeling trapped and lethargic. Especially if I had already planned to do it. We aren’t diagnosed but I do agree we hardcore have it. It’s been a pain when completing chores, everyone in the family have called me lazy for it. That mixed with chronic fatigue is hard to navigate as on good CFS days my PDA likes to act up, not always but it was really bad as a kid as we were literally forced to do chores, it wasn’t a good household.

remote nebula
loud light
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It’s the same things isn’t it? People still struggle with it so it is valid I would think.

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It’s just commonly misunderstood and used as a scapegoat in many situations.

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Instead of understanding it, people use it as an excuse to call those people lazy and a waste of energy/life and space.

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If anything it’s more similar to chronic fatigue of a different type, but I do struggle with it. If it was renamed to not sound ableist then maybe it’d be better.
Also not everyone with Autism has PDA as far as I know, unless I’m wrong.

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But it’s something I believe is caused by trauma

remote nebula
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I see. It really wasn’t my intention to make this post so controversial. I simply do not take a part in the TikTok discussions and therefor I guess I am not educated enough.

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My bad

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Would you like me to change the channel name to something else?

remote nebula
remote nebula
loud light
loud light
# remote nebula Also curious, in what way do you consider the term to be ableist? Great point!...

In a sense, the name can be pointed at the people around that person being the ‘victims’ of it rather than those who actually experience it. It’s more for other people to alienate and shame those who experience it instead of working to understand and comfort and guide those who experience it. So the PDA symptoms can lessen and feel safe rather than feeling trapped and hurt and unable to escape or do anything at all.

remote nebula
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Thanks for explaining. That makes sense. Even thought I see it more as a opinion that people have put into the word rather than the word being negative in itself.

reef berryBOT
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GG @remote nebula, you just advanced to level 5!

loud light
ivory citrus
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I was looking through this and i am still a little confused with what it is, i also searched it up and still am confused, is it possible for someone to even explain It in like simpler trrms? Its okay if not i understand

remote nebula
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I could try!

remote nebula
# ivory citrus I was looking through this and i am still a little confused with what it is, i a...

PDA (as I’ve understood it) is a profile that mostly seem to occur with autism (but it can also occur along with other neurodiversity such as ADHD though it seems to be less common). PDA or pathology demands avoidance means basically that the person having it is “allergic to demands” (roughly expressed). They will try to avoid demands of any kind such as:

  • Someone telling you to do something. Ex. take out the trash
  • Your body “telling” you to eat because you’re hungry
  • Someone expects you to do something. Ex. Putting down a plate of food in front of you.
ivory citrus
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Ah thank you

remote nebula
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There’s more 🙂

ivory citrus
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I have actually heard of this before and didnt know that it was contriversial

remote nebula
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Oh. Okay. Not the whole lesson then 😅

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I didn’t knew it was controversial either

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What is important to acknowledge though is that these “problematic behaviors” that often is what people see of PDA is a reaction to the built up anxiety that comes with constant demands. They can’t control these behaviors and often knows that it’s wrong to run away or hide someone’s belongings. It’s done as a way to regain some of the power that was taken away from them because of demands other puts on them.

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Behaviors such as lying or hiding stuff is usually done against one or more “safe persons”. It can be a family member for example. If you try to stop these behaviors, also called equalizing, it can result in a panic attack of the person who has PDA.

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Apart from people who have just autism they tend to have an easier time engaging in fantasy plays. They also tend to use stuffed animals and other objects as a person who does stuff for them. Like I can’t write my name, but my stuffed rabbit can.

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I guess it has to do with that the world they live in is so high in demands that living in a fantasy/roll play world makes for less demands.

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Just putting this down for further reference.

ivory citrus
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Yea

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Thank you