40k-lore-chat

[dusk patrol]

Don’t wanna get banned in uh….

certain countries

[arctic talon]

Tbf the wacky science is done by all 3 Abrahamic faiths

[late osprey]

it is but Jews don't have a martial presence yet

when IMO they should

[dusk patrol]

Don’t forget real life

I mean

Shut up Goyim

[late osprey]

💀

[arctic talon]

💀

[crystal forum]

prussia being a faction is funny

[queen laurel]

[arctic talon]

Anyways Trench Crusade Muslims drinking alcohol is like

Funny to me

[late osprey]

yeah the only ones who can't are the Trench Pilgrims

[arctic talon]

The morale benefits from stolen moonshine

[dusk patrol]

Forces of hell firing pig fat bullets at them to pierce their armor

[arctic talon]

Square bullets

Pucklegun

Or whatever the fuck it’s called

[crystal forum]

did you know the english i think used to shoot square bullets are muslism so it hurt more

with muskets

or was it spanish

[queen laurel]

A puckgun?

Yeah it is a puckle gun

[crystal forum]

i think it was catholics actually

[arctic talon]

British

Pucklegun was made by a British dude

[crystal forum]

that's just one example

[arctic talon]

Wait

[crystal forum]

i think they did it with regular muskets too

[arctic talon]

Was the square bullet thing widespread

💀

[crystal forum]

i dont remember

[queen laurel]

Wait wolf was the giant hell artillerys and the artilleries of new antioch literally the largest and most advanced guns in the setting of tc

[crystal forum]

but it's a shit idea anyways

terrible aerodynamics

[late osprey]

sorry quick correction, it was Herod's Temple

Solomon's Temple (the first one) was destroyed 500 years prior

[crystal forum]

but it would tumble in the air which would cause some pretty guresome wounds

[dusk patrol]

I’m pretty sure this is more something that was like

[crystal forum]

problem is it limits your range and accuracy even more... on a fucking musket

[dusk patrol]

Done once or twice maybe, more just said

And wasn’t really common

[arctic talon]

Idk, prolly

[dusk patrol]

Same with the pig fat thing

[crystal forum]

still funny

[dusk patrol]

It’s an amusing concept

[crystal forum]

it's like aircraft crews writing things on bombs im WW2

more of a morale thing

[dusk patrol]

Same thing as like, the giving diseased blankets to Indians thing, it possibly never happened and if it did we have exactly one recorded case which is dubious.

[arctic talon]

I wonder if they’ll get rid of Iron sultanate getting moonshine benefits

[late osprey]

im sure its inevitable lmao

[arctic talon]

It’s nice to have

[crystal forum]

why do you care so much about this wolf

[late osprey]

probably an oversight

[arctic talon]

But it feels like an oversight LOL

[dusk patrol]

Elite doesn’t wanna get Jihaded

[arctic talon]

Because pilgrims don’t get it and it feels weird RP wise

[queen laurel]

Well probably people will scream about it someday

So far this thing is under the radar

[dusk patrol]

Pilgrims should get the benefits of enjoying bacon as a compromise

[queen laurel]

I just know the twitter boys are getting ready to rile up when they find

Out about this setting

[arctic talon]

I’m the one doing Jihad to people on the board

[crystal forum]

the one muslim wargamer will be pissed

[late osprey]

to the surprise of im sure nobody, wargaming is generally eurocentric so people are more likely to flesh out what they're familiar with

[dusk patrol]

Trench Crusade is still pretty niche too

[arctic talon]

This is true yeah

[dusk patrol]

Contact your local Iman

Be the change you want to see

[late osprey]

ALTHOUGH...

technically moonshine could be wine

no reason why trench pilgrims shouldn't be able to pop open a cold cask with the boys

[dusk patrol]

Tbf too

Muslims and not drinking

Are uh

Well let’s just say there’s a lot of sinners

[crystal forum]

hey if christians do unchristian shit in the setting then why wouldn't some muslims drink moonshine

[arctic talon]

This is true lol

[dusk patrol]

What does the Koran say about genetic engineering?

[arctic talon]

Actually I guess the Iron sultanate troops don’t even need to be super faithful

Just due to how like, their list building is setup

[dusk patrol]

The Ottoman Empire iirc wasn’t known for being super devout like we know a lot of Islamic nations to be today

[arctic talon]

You don’t get any sort of theological practitioners, you do however get the Ultra Mega Nerds who commit Warcrimes and alchemy

And literal assassins

[arctic talon]

This is a good point yeah

[crystal forum]

it doesn't even mention the powerhouse of the cell, what a scam

[dusk patrol]

Example A: they were sorta kinda ok with Jews, as second class citizens.

Truly living our best life during that period

[queen laurel]

I'm just here thinking of a new ideas so that i can write that NA mechanize infantry shock assault war band i'm thinking about

That has nine mechanized infantry

[arctic talon]

I’ve decided I’m going to try running house of wisdom the next trench crusade campaign I’m in

With alchemist spam

[queen laurel]

Wait wolf

[crystal forum]

true mechanicus player

[queen laurel]

Can you run a sultanate army that specialize and deployments of

Alchemy creatures

[dusk patrol]

That’s their thing I’m pretty sure

[arctic talon]

That is House of Wisdom

[queen laurel]

Like lions of jabir and Brazen bulls

[arctic talon]

House of Wisdom can run 3x Jabir and 2x bulls

And 3 alchemists

[arctic talon]

You don’t get any other stuff though

[queen laurel]

Okay nice

[arctic talon]

No azebs, jannisaries, assassins, Ect x

[arctic talon]

House of wisdom has their own troops lord wise

[dusk patrol]

https://tenor.com/view/miyamoto-chris-pratt-san-he's-so-cool-he's-so-gif-4276221900741923469

[queen laurel]

And for the trench pilgrims i can also specialize in bringing shrine anchorites and communicants

[arctic talon]

Yes

[queen laurel]

I can't believe it

I am going to be busy writing

[arctic talon]

There’s a trench pilgrim warband that lets you buy communicants for 3 glory

Rather then the extremely high ducat cost

[crystal forum]

now i know where the jewish faction is

[queen laurel]

There's also a war band that specializes in shrine anchorites right

But in turn you can't bring in

Communicants

[queen laurel]

If i remember

[dusk patrol]

Iron Sultanate is imo the most horrific “good” faction lol

[queen laurel]

To be fair would you want to be in the front of that thing

[arctic talon]

House of wisdom rules

[queen laurel]

I don't want that lion thing to maul me

[crystal forum]

dont worry it has a helmet

[dusk patrol]

I’d much rather be behind it, watching it maul stuff

[arctic talon]

I’ll have you know the Lion was grown out of cows and wild animals, and only mauled one person to death before getting under control

Don’t ask about the Bulls

They’re probably made out of only animals

[crystal forum]

was muhammad a person in the setting

[arctic talon]

Ignore the fact they have morale, can operate guns, and enjoy good food and can talk

[queen laurel]

Okay so you have a trench pilgrim war band that can specialize on communicants and can only bring one shrine anchorite

[dusk patrol]

Strictly volunteers

[queen laurel]

But then you have another one that can bring two shrine anchorites

[dusk patrol]

Not to worry

[queen laurel]

But not bring communicants

[arctic talon]

The house of wisdom has never used human test subjects

This message has been sponsored by the house of wisdom

[arctic talon]

How people who say “the best lab is the battlefield” look

The house of wisdom is fucking creepy and weird

[queen laurel]

Okay so i got my war band set for my lore writing that i will ignore for the rest of my life

Trench pilgrims that specialize on communicants

Na that specialize on mechanized infantry

And sultanate that specialize on alchemy creatures

[arctic talon]

Beyond just being a normal library they also have a bunch of forbidden and evil tomes and godly tomes

[queen laurel]

Not original but f*** it

[arctic talon]

And also the whole

Haemonculus thing

[dusk patrol]

Good choice if you don’t want to paint too much too lol

[arctic talon]

That doesn’t use human flesh probably

Lol real

[dusk patrol]

Although your list is probably gonna get fucked hard by Tank Hunters

[crystal forum]

is there metamuhammads

[arctic talon]

No

Probably

[queen laurel]

Yeah but i am going to play the game because as you can see i am poor

So i'm just going to write this

[arctic talon]

The house of wisdom won’t comment on that if they did have meta Muhammad’s

[queen laurel]

I engage with warhammer through lore anyway what's the difference here

[arctic talon]

The house of wisdom’s creations lack all internal organs

As well

They’re weird flesh golem things

[queen laurel]

Wolf what was the specialized faction that specializes on shrine anchorites again

In the trench pilgrims

[arctic talon]

I forgor

I don’t know trench pilgrim stuff

[crystal forum]

i thought golems were a jewish thing

[arctic talon]

Well they’re not called golems

They’re alchemical beasts

But I can’t think of what word would be applicable aside from golem

The things lack 99.999% of internal organs

[queen laurel]

Aren't they like flesh golems

That's the best term right

[arctic talon]

Besides like a digestive tract(sometimes)

[queen laurel]

Since the basically made of flesh

[arctic talon]

They’re grown in weird labs with meat from animals

And they can’t be killed properly unless you chop them to pieces and burn them

[arctic talon]

And yes golems are a Jewish thing

I just don’t know a more appropriate word for what the Iron sultanates creatures are

[crystal forum]

fantasy ruined the idea of golems i swear.

[queen laurel]

So far we have the homunculus of the alchemist

The lions of jabir

And the brazen bulls

[arctic talon]

Also lions and bulls aren’t standardized

The minis are just one example of what some common versions look like

[queen laurel]

So you're telling me a bull that looks like a mancubus from doom can exist

[arctic talon]

I’m going to assume it’s me the horrific flesh creatures who may or may not use humans that are horrifying is why they’re horrific to you

[dusk patrol]

Yeah there’s definitely some

Implied fuckery there

[queen laurel]

I mean looking at the alchemical creatures

There's definitely human mixed in there there's no way

They look way to human

[dusk patrol]

The metahuman aspect of the elites is cool though

[crystal forum]

the pinkish bare flesh isn't enough of an indicator?

[crystal forum]

that harpy's face is hilarious

[crystal forum]

literally this

[dusk patrol]

She’s ready for some killin

[arctic talon]

It’s just, naked Lion flesh, don’t worry about it

[dusk patrol]

The Jannissaries, Captains and Assassins are all augmented with elixirs and given specially made armor using the Alchemists metallurgical skills

[arctic talon]

No I won’t talk about what happened to those dead bodies and failed alchemists

[crystal forum]

you know how naked lions look?

[arctic talon]

No

I’m gona assume they look like shaved cats

“Named after the great Sultan who commissioned the first of these weapons to defend the Iron Wall, this mighty bombard is used to disrupt advancing enemy formations. The echo of its blast recites the 99 names of Allah, throwing even the greatest of warriors to ground like chaff.”

[crystal forum]

that gas mask on bottom looks dumb

that's a coffee can style filter made to be used with a hose

[arctic talon]

Azebs are conscripts tbf

[dusk patrol]

They’re cannon fodder

[arctic talon]

I prefer the term skirmish experts 🤓

(Yeah no a lot of azebs literally have 0 training)

[crystal forum]

still looks dumb since they went for the coffee can filter look

[dusk patrol]

They’re a little more mercenary than other factions

[queen laurel]

Lieutenants have the elite wolf vibe for real for real

[arctic talon]

Azebs with proper military training are literally an upgrade you pay for per azeb

[dusk patrol]

They’re basically promised adventure and the chance to keep what they take

Which obviously for most doesn’t end well

[crystal forum]

i like the accurate jezail though

those are cool muskets

[arctic talon]

Also the azebs are self equipped aside from the gun

They don’t have standardized equipment

Every 20 houses needs to provide 1 azeb and all the equipment

[crystal forum]

that's what a jezail was for

afghanistan has a looooong history of weaponsmithing

[arctic talon]

Yeah

[crystal forum]

even to this day

[arctic talon]

It’s cool

[crystal forum]

very independent people

[dusk patrol]

Asssasins are basically Corvo from Dishonored.

Time travel and reality distortion abilities, weapons which are only getting stronger with each generation, which can make someone who touches the blade rot within seconds.

Taller, faster than normal people

[queen laurel]

So wolf what's your faction for this one

[arctic talon]

Iron sultanate

I like the aesthetic, I like how they play

I think the lore is neat

[dusk patrol]

They’re very cool

[languid meadow]

whatever go my Lion of Jabir

[queen laurel]

Mine are surprisingly trench pilgrims, because of communicants

Surprise surprise

[crystal forum]

any lore that isn't purely christian focused is already like 5 dimensions ahead of GW

[queen laurel]

I like the faction with the giant brutes

[crystal forum]

I like it

[queen laurel]

With my second favorite being the na

They are after all pretty cool

Medieval armor mixed with military soldier gear

Sign me up

[dusk patrol]

Jay you need to read more

[queen laurel]

You know he's going to ignore that right

[dusk patrol]

Yes

But it needs to be said regardless

[queen laurel]

And the guessing by your average eternal brain you went with na?

[dusk patrol]

Tbh I don’t know if I have a favorite

I like all three for different reasons

NA is really cool

[queen laurel]

Yeah it's obvious for me i like the big guys of the good guys faction

[arctic talon]

My Lion of Jabar will maul many heretics

[dusk patrol]

But I really dig the vibe of Sultanate and the Trench Pilgrims too

[queen laurel]

Communicants, Takwins, the mechanize heavy infantry

[dusk patrol]

Yeah I enjoy them too

[crystal forum]

will you watch from afar

[dusk patrol]

Sultanate if I decide to get into it I’ll probably do a mix Jannissaries and assassins

[crystal forum]

your lion from jabar

[queen laurel]

I will say it besides age age of sigmar which made me like multiple factions, trench crusade does the same

The good guy factions are so good

[arctic talon]

Also the Haemonculus helper the alchemists make is made out of human flesh

Or rather their own flesh

[dusk patrol]

NA I like the Mechanized guys

[arctic talon]

And if they fail the Haemonculus kills them, burrows into their body and uses it as a flesh suit

And then the other alchemists need to kill it

Or guards

[dusk patrol]

Trench Pilgrims I’ll probably do a army built around two Anchorites

[arctic talon]

Whichever finds the failed experiment first LOL

[dusk patrol]

For Hell I’d probably just do the basic guys

Trench Ghosts are cool though too lol

Apparently kinda OP rn too

[arctic talon]

They’re really hard to kill

Which means you can’t inflict meaningful injuries or casualties

So they can snowball hard

[dusk patrol]

Yeah, they’re slow

But if they can get in they’re super annoying

Bad for objective stuff though because of that if you don’t play it right

[queen laurel]

These are some of the coolest big guys i have ever seen i need to make an army around them

I'm always a sucker for massive monsters and brute guys

[dusk patrol]

Yeah it’s just great aesthetics

[arctic talon]

Also I think it’s kind of nightmarish how Lions of Jabar sometimes just have human minds

Like

How does that happen by accident 💀

[queen laurel]

Wolf trench pilgrim communicans can use guns right

[dusk patrol]

With TP I’m torn between a double Anchorite army or a communicant focused army

[arctic talon]

Yeah

[queen laurel]

Wicked

Welp i am going to have fun making my warband lore

[arctic talon]

I just love the alchemist lore

It’s so derranged

The entire process of becoming one

[dusk patrol]

Sniper Priests are a pretty badass concept too

[queen laurel]

So how did this one fail

Apparently his alchemy creature he was making looked a lot like his old dead pet and this thing decided to maul him

[dusk patrol]

They blind themselves and let God guide their aim

And it works lol

[arctic talon]

Well if you fail to become an alchemist you usually just die horribly

[queen laurel]

Yeah weeds out the weak

[arctic talon]

Your first bomb goes wrong, the Haemonculus helper kills you because you made it wrong, and opening your third eye going wrong drives you insane

[dusk patrol]

Shockingly taking the Elixirs to get enhanced isn’t something that’s fun

[arctic talon]

The only safe part of becoming an alchemist

Is making your own armor

[queen laurel]

It's still funny to me that this paladin

Is taller than this

[arctic talon]

Also tbf some do survive the failed haemonculus incident and try again

[languid meadow]

Where are the pixels William

[dusk patrol]

But if you do

[arctic talon]

Ated them

[dusk patrol]

You become a monstrously tall, fast, tough and strong badass with super armor that shrugs off bullets

[queen laurel]

I beat it to death

[dusk patrol]

He’s taller than most canon examples of 40k primarchs

To put it in perspective

[languid meadow]

Who up hearing the voice of god

[dusk patrol]

Of how insanely tall that guy is

[arctic talon]

Next, they must create a takwin servant, a Homunculus creature of artificial life and intellect. If the candidate manages to follow the complex formula, as well as the intricate timing and temperature requirements, the creature will emerge after forty days of toil. It will act as the Alchemist’s living tool of creation, for their hands have fine motor skills well beyond even the nimblest craftsman. Vaguely shaped like a small human, it can change the consistency of its body to an almost liquid- like slime to squeeze into alchemical chambers to do their master’s bidding in extreme temperatures and in the fog of poisonous chemical fumes. Many aspirants fail here and their creation emerges from its golden celestial sphere a deformed monstrosity, filled with hatred towards its creator. It burrows itself into the Alchemist’s body to consume it from within, wearing its would-be master as a skin.

[queen laurel]

Yeah he's 17 ft

And the tallest one is vulcan how tall is he

[dusk patrol]

maybe Ferrus or Magnus were that

Nah Vulkan was shorter than Ferrus

[arctic talon]

These guys’s helmet is so funny to me tbh

[dusk patrol]

Magnus was the tallest but he had biomancy so

It wasn’t really consistent

[queen laurel]

Okay so just tell me what's the height of the tallest primarch

[dusk patrol]

Ferrus was noted to tower over his brothers by a good margin.

[hallow saddle]

Wait I thought vulkan was the tallest?

[dusk patrol]

Not super clear, I’m probably like 15-16 feet.

Nah

Idk where people get that idea

He’s the same height as most his brothers, he’s just built broad and wears bulky armor.

[opaque coyote]

"IT IS AN INTENTIONAL CHOICE!"

[queen laurel]

Fuck me is it one of those things that are false and people spread it in the community and it has gotten so deep everyone just thinks that now

Fucks sake

[dusk patrol]

Iirc Vulkan was about Sanguinius and Corax’s height

[queen laurel]

Man

[dusk patrol]

When it’s brought up

Russ was also the shortest

Shorter than Valdor

[queen laurel]

Damn it

[opaque coyote]

Aren't Alpharius and Omegon the shortest

[queen laurel]

And here i thought vulcan was the biggest

[dusk patrol]

Nah

[hallow saddle]

Short king

[dusk patrol]

Russ is

[arctic talon]

Alpharius and Omegon are weird

[opaque coyote]

He certainly is the greenest though

[opaque coyote]

How tf do they disguise as regular Marines then

Biomancy?

[hallow saddle]

I hate meme lore!!I hate meme lore!!I hate meme lore!!I hate meme lore!!I hate meme lore!!

[arctic talon]

They just do

They have a weird psychic aura

That makes them blend in extremely well

[opaque coyote]

Even though they are like

Bigger than their marines

[arctic talon]

Well yeah

They’re still on the smaller side

[dusk patrol]

Alpharius and Omegon were a bit shorter but not that much

They’re still giants

There’s multiple times we see they “turn off” their aura and people immediately are like “wait what the fuck”

Because they’re obviously primarchs

[queen laurel]

Where do you think the vulcan is the tallest comes from

[hallow saddle]

https://www.reddit.com/r/ImaginaryWarhammer/s/zfn3zgxXAX

[queen laurel]

It has gotten so bad that people just pass it around and i even i thought that was the truth

[opaque coyote]

Well NBA players are often tall

[dusk patrol]

Idk, people want him to be?

He’s probably one of the taller ones

But yeah he was a head shorter than Ferrus

[hallow saddle]

LOL

[crystal forum]

he's black

[hallow saddle]

come on

[queen laurel]

Glad to see you still have no filter jay

[hallow saddle]

[dusk patrol]

In uh, Fulgrim there’s a scene with Ferrus, Corax and Vulkan planning Istvaan V, and it’s mentioned Ferrus over even then

[hallow saddle]

Don't make the joke

[dusk patrol]

Another kinda interesting one of Mortarion was probably one of the physically strongest

The Khan mentions his blows felt similar to Ferrus’s.

Also making him physically tire for the first time ever in his life.

Or one of

[crystal forum]

i think i'd die if any of the primarchs punched me

[dusk patrol]

Safe to say very few things wouldn’t

[hallow saddle]

My head would straight up explode if any of them punched me right in the balls

[dusk patrol]

Alpharius still almost killed Dorn in a straight up fight and it’s implied he wasn’t going full force for whatever reason

None of them were pushovers

[hallow saddle]

Imagine Ferrus pinching you

Punching

[dusk patrol]

Guilliman tangled with Lorgar and then Angron back to back and it was still very close

[hallow saddle]

his arms are metal

[crystal forum]

i love that iron hands have a bunch of buffs if you decide to go without ferrus to counteract how op primarchs are

[opaque coyote]

Mortarion is just held back by his own self-hatred and severe asthma

[dusk patrol]

Ferrus until he got to Fulgrim exclusively used his arms only on Istvaan V

And he was still annihilating whole companies and tank groups.

[crystal forum]

hulk mode engaged

[dusk patrol]

Literally just punching into tanks and ripping out the crews.

[rose thorn]

This gets reposted every once in a while and it always reminds me of, let me find it

[dusk patrol]

Also, the traitor super heavies and titans tried to fire on him, and he just walked out of the craters after.

[crystal forum]

he probably had more void shields than a titan

[rose thorn]

Actually I won’t post it but it’s a graph of men getting smaller and weaker but it’s actually from a fetish website

[hallow saddle]

feel like pure shit, just want ferrus manus back

[hallow saddle]

LOl

[crystal forum]

same

i want ferry many

[arctic talon]

What 💀

[dusk patrol]

[rose thorn]

Yeah an alt right Twitter account reposted it forever ago and i still die laughing over it

[dusk patrol]

I guess thank you for showing some restraint

For once

[rose thorn]

And it was like “is this true?”

[arctic talon]

My honest reaction

[rose thorn]

LMAO

[crystal forum]

men will literally do anything to have bigger dicks

[queen laurel]

Is that beardless jesus christ

[rose thorn]

“Space marines are getting small, weaker, softer every generation. The imperium is dead”

[arctic talon]

It’s one of the main villains from persona 3 LOL

And yes a common nickname is Japanese revolver Jesus

Who likes shooting teenagers and children

[queen laurel]

I mean hey fits him just by the looks

[arctic talon]

His persona is however not Jesus lol

It’s Hypnos

[dusk patrol]

But yeah the Medusan Carapace was wild, I wish we got to see him use all the weapons it on more. The arsenal it has is insane.

A Arch Magos somehow found a piece of it in 40k and claimed he could study it and use it to revolutionize their armor, but the Iron Father he had hid it from just said if they didn’t hand it over he would take his company and leave the world to the Orks that were attacking it, and raze the planet from orbit.

After he personally killed the Magos and his entire staff.

[arctic talon]

Revolver Jesus, Goth woman, nerd with actual hand grenades

[arctic talon]

Sounds about right

[queen laurel]

The ideal blunt rotation

[arctic talon]

Did you know that hand grenades suck and are in fact extremely painful

[queen laurel]

Why yes of course everyone knows how dangerous one is

[dusk patrol]

What about feet grenades?

https://tenor.com/view/tarantino-sunglasses-head-turn-gif-16095500336819635617

[dusk patrol]

This is the only timeline Tarantino isn’t a serial killer that works at a VHS repair shop

[queen laurel]

[arctic talon]

LOL

[hallow saddle]

hahaha

[storm jungle]

im sorry it was impulse

[raven stone]

lives

Meme gotta be meme’d.

[storm jungle]

[storm jungle]

me whenever anyone in this chat is having fun

[outer wave]

Dilara when anyone has a whimsical thought about 40k

[storm jungle]

[raven stone]

Less “whimsical”, more “whenever anyone mistakes fanon for canon”

[tight stratus]

It was only late last year as I started to get into warhammer proper that i learnt the lore of warhammer or the timeline doesnt change, it stays in the same period. As in, the emporer is almost always on his last legs, tyranids are always just around the corner, the earth is always almost in peril.

Like there's no year on year massive development to the franchise, even if fans are encouraged to think about the what if's and such.

I had always thought people were following along to some bigger storyline and thats why new models got released and why people stick around

[opaque coyote]

Sometimes both

[outer wave]

I think thats been changing a bit with recent editions, but yes its generally a very static universe

[opaque coyote]

Tbf that's mainly them trying to balance out people's campaigns and such. Leaving plenty of room for homebrew

[outer wave]

Mhm

[opaque coyote]

But personally it's too static at times

Feels boring instead of grimdark

[outer wave]

Also yeah

[opaque coyote]

Again, Imperium Nihilus should get more detail other than it

Existing

[raven stone]

Ironically they kind of sort of did upend things ever so little lately with 10th.

Ironically, I stick around because of the “open sandbox lore” aspect, weirdly enough.

If you step beyond the Marine porn (or already have done so), 40k is actually a fairly colourful setting. Twice so if you are the imaginative sort.

[tight stratus]

Was there ever a time in warhammers history where developments would happen and shock the community and get them talking and thinking? Or has it always been like this?

[tight stratus]

Also interesting take, good for me to think about

[opaque coyote]

I think it's mentioned that Nihilus is basically equivalent to like

A bunch of Warlord Imperium states

And GW could easily detail that while leaving enough room for homebrew

It would be interesting

[raven stone]

You could also see it kind of like East/West Roman Empire split as well

[opaque coyote]

You'd have Gulliman's half for my re Cohesive Story Telling

And Nihilus if you want more Chaos so to speak

Both figuratively and very literally

[tight stratus]

I started taking an interest in warhammer with pretty much everything but the marines. My most recent obsession is genestealers, but it started with Tau as a kid. But I never knew or delved any deeper than they look cool till now that I'm much older

[opaque coyote]

Nihilus would definitely be a more interesting sandbox.

...if there was actually sand in the sandbox yk

[tight stratus]

in reply to the latter half of this btw

[opaque coyote]

Like even games like Minecraft have basic mechanics and tools

Even the earlier editions without the ender dragon, you'd still generally have the goal of obtaining resources and shit

Nihilus needs to have some more details for it to be a cool sandbox

[raven stone]

My own personal take is that back at 40k lore inception at 3rd edition, the writers had intended for 40k to be “role playing on an army scale” (think D&D levels of storytelling applied to your own collected army), and the only reason why the entire setting was so crap is so that no matter which side you pick, you are only going to make the universe better (that and setting the bar really low so it is easy for any player to make things better in their corner of personalised lore).

But sadly I think everyone missed the point.

As for the Marine porn - it is kind of on GW to accidentally make Marines the 40k flagship faction. Not helping is giving them a really beginner friendly rule of “not running away”.

They have been getting better recently though, showing that Marines are very removed from normal humans.

One of the many reasons why I am moving away from Marines in 40k.

[storm jungle]

Pretty much the only person thats gonna disagree with you on this is a space marine fan too

Its like Star Wars with the Jedi, the Mandalorian was great until we got more force-shit and it ruined everything about the show

actually exploring the setting is a rarity in most sci-fi media

[opaque coyote]

Which kinda fucking sucks

Like

Why?

[storm jungle]

Its mostly either not profitable or people are uncreative.

its why shit like the Fantasy Flight RPGs in 40k are so good

[raven stone]

The accusation of “not profitable” in this aspect speaks as much about the majority of audience as much as it does producers and funders, TBH

[opaque coyote]

I think I can at least get it on some level for 40k because it's more like

A setting you can build up on. You're supposed to insert your own shit into it.

But I never got why Star Wars didn't explore more of it.

[tight stratus]

I remember feeling a bit vindicated from Dilara the other month when she agreedm when I said one of the reasons I loved Genestealer Cults models, and factions is its one of the few insights we get into warhammer life as a citizen life cause of what they choose to use, the bikes, the jeeps, cars, the abborants with road signs, the fanmade limozines, some of the weapons, tools etc.

I'm not sure of much of 40ks official terrain kits maybe theres more clues there, but it'd be really cool to see a legoworld style city at warhammerworld / for sale if you just wanna build a city rather than an army

[storm jungle]

Again SW is a really good example of it

theres a reason almost every major SW show failed

then Andor comes along, a show about a literal nobody

and people praise it to high heavens because yes its peak

[opaque coyote]

I don't even think the people who watched Mandalorian wanted more force shit.

[storm jungle]

They didnt yeah

it went downhill the MOMENT legacy characters came back

it was so crap

[storm jungle]

as ever also super recommend the Warhammer crime books/anthologies

[opaque coyote]

I think the only other piece of extra media that I liked is the Darth Vader comics

Those are genuinely great

Along with the Clone Wars and The Bad Batch

[raven stone]

Necromunda as a whole might be more your thing, in all honesty, and Dilara is the right person to reach out to. A heavy focus on daily life in Imperial Hive worlds.

I myself still prefer the 40k scale but am pivoting - quite heavily - to Imperial Agents, personalisation galore and all.

[opaque coyote]

Who knew that exploring the extensive fucking

GALAXY

That Star Wars takes place in

Might be interesting to see???

[storm jungle]

Real.

[opaque coyote]

The Clone Wars show had Anakin and Ashoka explore different planets. It also painted a picture for what the war was like for normal people

[tight stratus]

Yeah I pretty much have loved everything I see in necramunda, apparently you can use a bunch of those models in 40k tabletop as a genestealer player too cause they're in that so its double bonus for me

[opaque coyote]

Same with The Bad Batch

It also helps that the protagonists are characters that were from the previous show. Along with exploring the period of when the Republic turned into the Empire

I genuinely thought it was interesting still seeing the Senate, if only as a puppet.

Like it implies genuine transition.

It shows that the world is alive

And it fucking sucks that most of the sequels and other shows just

Do not get that

I hate it

I genuinely hate it

And I'm happy these shows fail

[raven stone]

If you really want value for your money, do Genestealer Cults. You can play Necromunda, Kill Team AND normal 40k with mostly the same miniatures.

[opaque coyote]

It shows that audiences want exploration

Something new and sitmulating

[storm jungle]

Also late reply but yeah back in the day pre-Rift 40k was always stagnant, the 13th Black Crusade was always some "eh its never happening" kind of pipedream for some people until GW actually did advance the setting into a new "era" of sorts which was unseen at the time.

In my opinion you should largely ignore the multiple main narratives that go on in 40k currently and just focus on the smaller stuff with novels, short stories etc, theres a ton to choose from that isnt just wank/bolterporn. 40k is much better when you juggle around and roughly like all factions imo, theres so much to explore for all of them.

40k at the end of the day is a setting and not a story, the lore never matters and its only about selling toys

[opaque coyote]

It's probably why there's a lot of old jokes in the fandom and why they genuinely don't seem to catch up

Because it took so long to get new stuff

[storm jungle]

Yeah ive been a warhammer fan for 12 years or so, i was really around back then lol

[opaque coyote]

The memes about Abaddon being lazy as fuck and idiotic were true. They aren't now, but having somebody be like

"bro trust me the 13th crusade is coming"

never does it

[raven stone]

Or you can even do a mid to big brain moment and start writing your own lore for your own minis.

I was 40k fan since 3rd edition back in the 90s…

[storm jungle]

^^^^^^

[tight stratus]

Have to learn how to play first! Been doing my battle honours going in and out of the store collecting my stamps. Id love to try out the cute lil Tyranid space marine game in it haha

[storm jungle]

also this yeah completely forgot

I do a ton of homebrew so i can relate lol

[raven stone]

Nice!

[opaque coyote]

forgets to thin the paints

"Yeah uh... my Marines have uh... a very bad Geneseed mutation."

"Yes.. that's totally intentional and not just me fucking up."

[arctic talon]

40k is less stagnant now but its still mostly static

[raven stone]

Ah yep, in fact my hobby skills were more on/off and it’s only my recent restarts where I have, indeed, started to thin paints a bit more, and sometimes I still fall into the trap or “this doesn’t feel like it is enough”

[arctic talon]

who doesn't do at least some homebrew tbh

Pretty much every person engages in it to an extent

even if its not like

large imo

[storm jungle]

Its inevitable imo. This entire setting is propagandized around subtly making you wanna do homebrew.

[arctic talon]

real and true

[storm jungle]

Thankfully i stick to OCs and narrative shit

i never buy minis

[arctic talon]

I own plastic meth

in fact I own a lot of it

[tight stratus]

My first proper purchase was genestealers combat patrol still working through it. But got these guys so far

[arctic talon]

nice

[storm jungle]

very cool!

i respect the biker choices lol

[tight stratus]

I think the one with an axe is a special thing you can only get in the combat patrol box

so I had to get him

[raven stone]

@tight stratus I will give GW the smallest bit of credit: for all of the implied static-ness (and Primaris Marine porn) that recent edition has been up to, an important positive thing was the weird warp rift tearing the galaxy in half (which is actually a genuinely recent addition)

This bit is important because it logically gives Rogue Traders a reason to operate inside Imperial borders.

(TLDR: Rogue Traders are like Spanish Conquistadors of old, exploring the outer rims of the galaxy, and usually not active inside Imperium territories. The rift is a much needed lore excuse as to why Rogue Traders will operate inside the Imperium, charting and mapping new Warp routes for profit.)

[arctic talon]

Tbf

we have had plot progress this edition

Pariah Nexus actually progressed

[vagrant fox]

I just wanted Samurai Jack but he's a mandalorian instead

[arctic talon]

shocking I know

as for Nachmund

please finish it in the crusade book

THIS SHIT HAS BEEN GOING ON SINCE 8E

GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF NACHMUND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[storm jungle]

I still cannot believe

they went back to fucking Nachmund

what a waste of a warzone lol

[arctic talon]

We have more warzones

💀

Why the fuck did we go to Nachmund

[storm jungle]

Yeah i wish they explored anything else

[arctic talon]

of all the places

of all the active warzones

[storm jungle]

Okay remind me like-

isnt Nachmund that Vigilus area where the War of the Beast-

I MEAN SORRY

War of Beasts™️ happened

[arctic talon]

Yes

[storm jungle]

(what a shit name btw)

[arctic talon]

Well

Vigilus was its own

seperate warzone

that got resolved

but yes

[storm jungle]

Cockmund Gauntlet moment

[arctic talon]

Its on the other fucking end of Nachmund

[storm jungle]

yeah such a weird choice

this lore in it better be fucking good

lol

[arctic talon]

if they resolve it

with either a Chaos or Imperial victory

definitively

I will be happy

fuck I'll take the genestealers

winning Nachmund out of nowhere

if thats what it takes

[raven stone]

Wait I thought we were bored with Imperial victories…

[tight stratus]

Genestealers being found on Terra was a recent lore thing right? I remember watching a warhammer lore video on youtube

[raven stone]

Ye, very recent

[tight stratus]

but they were expunged before they did any real damage

[storm jungle]

Recent but realistically speaking they'd have been there forever

[storm jungle]

It doesnt matter largely

all it takes is 1 genestealer to make it through

[crystal forum]

recent meaning like half a decade ago

[storm jungle]

it will just happen again, Custodians dont care as long as the Palace isnt at risk

[tight stratus]

Tbh my ass still sitting in 2015 so its just right for my thinking

[storm jungle]

Shadowthrone is from 2021

[crystal forum]

that's 4 years ago dilara

[raven stone]

Or if we take the Helix Cult lore, no GS needed, just some tainted medical supplies…

[storm jungle]

Still recent

not everyone is gay like you nerd

[arctic talon]

We haven't had a single Imperial victory since 7e

regarding major campaign warzones lol

which is fine

[crystal forum]

SADLY

[raven stone]

…I am so out of touch lol

[arctic talon]

but also I think I want an actual chaos loss

LO

LOL

more then I want an imperial victory

Chaos has WON EVERY

WARZONE

THEY ARE IN

[raven stone]

Despite knowing a lot of the basics from 3rd edition.

[arctic talon]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I don't mind phyrric wins

[crystal forum]

havent they lost 12 black crusadws

[arctic talon]

I just hate that chaos has won every single warzone

which is fucking boring

[storm jungle]

Its based

[arctic talon]

Chaos doesn't count black crusades

[storm jungle]

eat it loyalists

[crystal forum]

they lost baal

[storm jungle]

they havent

Baal is fine

[crystal forum]

oh

yeah

[storm jungle]

the black crusades werent losses

[crystal forum]

chaos lost baal

[arctic talon]

Also Baal was a phyrric imperial victory

[storm jungle]

im gonna rip out your entrails

[arctic talon]

but that was 7e

lol

Chaos didn't lose on Baal

either

Chaos just killed a fuck ton of stuff then left

because they couldn't get on to Baal proper

[crystal forum]

isn't that how chaos always operates

pristine maguffin planet of the imperium suddenly turned to shit by chaos

[storm jungle]

Uhhh

okay honestly yeah

metallica

💀

[vagrant fox]

I guess chaos failed tonstop gman from resurrecting

[arctic talon]

Metalica was just an Imperium L

lol

and thats fine

[storm jungle]

L for Admech fans at least

[arctic talon]

liek total fucking Imperial L

[storm jungle]

LOL

[arctic talon]

LOL

I mean the Imperium was fighting it

It wasn't just mechanicus

[storm jungle]

well yeah but everyone was like

[arctic talon]

hell I'd say Deimos liked what happened to Metalica

[storm jungle]

"Anyway lets move on"

meanwhile Metallica

[crystal forum]

imperium should send people to rampage around in the eye of terror to give chaos a taste of their own medicine

[storm jungle]

MY CABBAGES

[storm jungle]

How

Theres nothing to attack

[crystal forum]

very carefully

[storm jungle]

Jay this is why you'd become a latrine servitor like the rest of us

[raven stone]

The last time they did that we ended up with several Chapter’s worth of new Chaos Warbands!

[storm jungle]

this is like after 9/11, George Bush just went

[tight stratus]

Chaos invading the imperium, imperium also has genestalers. How does something like that play out. Are genestealers a temporarily ally in that scenario.

I sorta forgot how Tyranids view Chaos if at all or any different, I'm on the understanding its all biomass everytime and thats the only answer

[vagrant fox]

Just send more Cato figures into the eye

[storm jungle]

"Go and attack this general area"

points at the middle east

oh wait thats exactly what he did

rip

[crystal forum]

@arctic talon show me the image of the skitarii expansion fleet pointing to the eye of terror

[raven stone]

A 3 way fight may well break out.

[rocky gale]

https://tenor.com/view/now-watch-this-drive-gif-25121927

[crystal forum]

so will the cicatrix ever close up or is half the galaxy forever in the shadow realm

[storm jungle]

++Wall of text incoming++

The genestealers would fight their own battle against the Chaos forces and the Imperials, their true masters are Tyranids themselves remember, them "allying" unless they are under disguise as citizen-militia and such is basically impossible.

And Nids view chaos largely as a "anomaly", basically they are not worth the fight half the time unless theres biomass involved and largely try to not bother with them UNLESS its a hivefleet like Kronos whos entire job is to battle and disband daemonic/chaos forces, this goes as far as them not being able to never really get proper biomass and thus being aided and fueled on their stockpile by other nearby hivefleets.

[raven stone]

@tight stratus in addition to the above…
Tyranids don’t differentiate that much between biomasses. Though they might find demons a bit odd, Nids canonically do not care about the oddity.

Chaos…well, their followers might be forewarned by their dark gods the Nids are coming, and the Chaos gods promise salvation through madness, insanity and conversion of the planet to a warp planet.

As you can imagine, Imperial authorities are going to have an absolute shit day.

[storm jungle]

^

[crystal forum]

we rarely see nids vs chaos because they both need imperials to ruin

[tight stratus]

Interesting okay 👍

And this would be the case (though didnt occur to me till I saw a vid the other day) Genestealers isn't a Imperium only 'bonus', like genestealers hypothetically are with the eldar, the tau, etc

[storm jungle]

Yeah uh

"realistically" speaking a genestealer can infect any organic being.

Humans are just the best vessel because we fuck and breed like crazy and imperial worlds offer IMMENSE amount of areas to hide in and oppressed populaces to manipulate and convert.

its why the official cults come from many walks of life, medicine experts, miners, soldier groups, spacefarers, etc

[crystal forum]

nid tau would be very easy to spot because no belief in greater good

[raven stone]

The only lore oddity is Orks Genestealers not outnumbering human Genestealers (since Orks are more numerous than humans)

But from a numerical point of view, it makes biological sense for eating the galaxy.

[storm jungle]

^

Every other faction is too bothersome to infect

Humans are perfect because we are like rats lol

[raven stone]

And numerically inferior to Orks/humans.

[crystal forum]

ork nid would get clobbered to death because they'll act weird

[tight stratus]

Couldn't an Ork become a genestealer through non-conventional means just because the Ork suddenly believes they're a genestealer and believe they're hearing the hivemind?

[crystal forum]

that's not how ork logic works

[storm jungle]

Other orks would kill them

[vagrant fox]

I can think of two books with tau genestealers and in one of them it's is done on purpose. There's probably more

[dusk patrol]

Meanwhile Medusa:

[storm jungle]

orks are extremely tribal

they also dont have sex lol

[dusk patrol]

https://tenor.com/view/spongebob-how-many-times-do-we-need-to-teach-you-old-man-slow-thick-gif-12272188

[crystal forum]

orks can't will themselves into changing species

[storm jungle]

I mean

Squigs kinda can

otherwise yea lol

[tight stratus]

Yeah the vision is pretty funny in my head, got some animorphs shit going on in my head rn

[storm jungle]

Not wrong tbh

lol

But basically as long as theres a "stable" enough maturing cycle in the species a genestealer can exploit it

humans just take priority because tabletop

[dusk patrol]

Genestealers Cults definitely work fine on Tau, they just have less density and Kroot can sniff them out apparently.

But we know of multiple worlds which have fallen to Tau GSCs

[storm jungle]

Thats not working "fine"

[dusk patrol]

I mean it is when they literally do what they’re supposed to

[storm jungle]

I mean then how do they get sniffed out

[dusk patrol]

Because like Imperium cults sometimes they fail

[storm jungle]

"Sometimes" is being a bit generous but sure

[vagrant fox]

Kroot are special little boys

[storm jungle]

guh-

[tight stratus]

Kroot really feel like a swiss army knife of things to a lamen like me. Everytime someone talks about kroot its always a "Did you know?" moment

[storm jungle]

They are like-

one of the most fleshed out xenos in the setting

[dusk patrol]

You know if this was the Imperium you’d just say it’s plot armor and lame

[storm jungle]

mfers been around for over 10 years, they get extra stuff added to them constantly which is fun

[raven stone]

So just for a bit of bonus lore information (and because I always wanted to write a fanfic of a 40k version of Romance of Three Kingdoms with GS Cults/Chaos/Imperial humans fighting it out without actual Nids/Marines of any sort):

if you were to compare Genestealer Cults with Chaos Cults, an important distinction is the time frame.

Due to warp fuckery, a Chaos cult can use underhanded methods to “Hulk out” overnight (metaphorically speaking), as they have numerous ways of breaking a human mind to serve Chaos.

Genestealer Cutls, on the other hand, are organic. Their uprising is bred through multiple generations, so it does mean by the time a GS Cult takes open arms, more likely than not at least several decades or even hundreds of years might have passed. The only exception to this, is if a pre-infected Guard Regiment/Labour force is imported to the target world en masse. In this case, a GS Cult could be activated overnight, similar to a Chaos cult “Hulking out”, if the Hive Mind deems it appropriate.

[dusk patrol]

Genestealer and Chaos cults also like to royal rumble when they happen to be trying to take the same world

[storm jungle]

Not really but if you wanna argue about it reddit is there

whiny ahh

[dusk patrol]

There’s an excerpt too where someone is infiltrating a Tau world and they accidentally trigger a Genestealer cult while sneaking around its underbelly, which leads to the cult being exposed earlier.

[tight stratus]

Yeah I embarerssed myself in front of the GW employee when he asked if I did any genestealer reading and I explained how I thought the generations worked.

I said it started with the Primus, then to human-like, back to beast, then back to human-like again as thats the best one to fit in. I learnt some bad info.

[storm jungle]

Wait

[dusk patrol]

Dummy

[storm jungle]

how did you think it worked

[dusk patrol]

The genestealers puts its balls inside the victim

[storm jungle]

Thats how space marines reproduce

stop getting your lore mixed up

[dusk patrol]

Um they can both do that

Duh

[tight stratus]

Some youtuber explained it as it starts with the first genestealer, putting the slug thing into a human, then the human has a beast, then that beast breeds till they get to the human one again (i think), the reason why I remember is so much is the back and forth they described instead of beast beast beast beast oh god its looking more like us

[storm jungle]

youtuber

Death by hammers

[dusk patrol]

I mean that’s

A sorta accurate general idea

The slug thing isn’t really it but

[storm jungle]

Yeah its just a tongue-stab

[tight stratus]

Oh I thought a slug crawled in there, my b

[storm jungle]

it has a little hole in the tip that infects you with alien bacteria

[dusk patrol]

It’s more like a disease which overwrites them

[storm jungle]

mmmm covid

[raven stone]

Less charitable descriptions may well say it is exactly like what you think it sounds like when it comes to infecting woman…

[storm jungle]

Well

theres a reason GW has moved away from that

lets just say lol

[raven stone]

And good on them in all honesty.

[storm jungle]

Yeah uh, reading the Deathwatch book back in the day was HUERGH

https://tenor.com/view/cat-death-lol-gif-20542436

[raven stone]

ooof

[tight stratus]

Im guessing it was horny

[storm jungle]

Uhhh worse

[tight stratus]

Rapey?

[storm jungle]

it had a lot of forced sexual assault by cult members

yeah that lol

[sly ivy]

Dilara don’t you know YouTube is literally the crucible of canon

[tight stratus]

The old genestealer bosses looked like the type honestly

[storm jungle]

Harvey Genestein???

[raven stone]

I have not read it, so I will say if the book spent entire passages describing that, which is what I suspect it did, yea, overkill.

[sly ivy]

second only to Reddit posts made on the toilet

[storm jungle]

nowadays all of it is largely consensual since the entirety of its members are genetically and psychically brainwashed

[raven stone]

Just tell us in a single sentence bad things were done, and move on.

[opaque coyote]

How the fuck does the hulking out thing even happen

Like do they just do a ritual or something

"Oh mighty insert god here give us strength to destroy the corpse worshippers."

[tight stratus]

In its defence, it'd be weird to have a universe where just about everything bad under the sun happens except that. I guess the problem comes in when you explicitly need it dramatisized and in book form, just the knowledge that "yea it happens in this universe" is perhaps enough

[raven stone]

Rituals, radio wave brainwashing (like the mission we do to shut off the transmission), corrupted priests preaching for Chaos under the guise of loyalist garb…

[storm jungle]

||ıts very fucked up because an Inquisition agent has to partake in a group rape scene with women to not get discovered and its very much implied the cult leader knows hes here already.||

||It also has the previous female agent thats gone silent impregnated with a genestealer which the Deathwatch have to extract with the lady for "inspection" by her master Inquisitor AUGHHHHH ||

[storm jungle]

That is another can of worms but basically 40k largely never explores this stuff as to not "unsettle" its readers, its why they stick to gore and violence as an alternative.

GW ironically doesnt want to alienate its audience, its why every guard book almost has a happy go lucky regiment that isnt a roving band of lunatic fascists and just dudes and gals trying to largely do the right thing.

[raven stone]

Yea ok that should have raised red flags for Slaanesh cults…

[storm jungle]

In reality your average imperial guard regiment would be about as bad as the imperial japanese army in WW2 lol

especially considering the absolute amount of propaganda and indoctrination they kinda go through

[opaque coyote]

I mean tbf sexual stuff can be fucked up unintentionally.

[storm jungle]

but again if you are reading guard you dont really wanna see them doing atrocities

you wanna see them be heroes against generic evil chaos cultists and evil aliens

[opaque coyote]

Like not even just for cruelty, like it can be unintentionally poorly handled

And God help you if that happens

[raven stone]

I think the actual difficulty is that GW realises not all writers can handle traumatising subjects properly

[storm jungle]

Also that yeah

but its a mix, again these books are here to sell toys

[raven stone]

And so decided on the safer path of not mentioning at all.

[storm jungle]

nobody would want to really buy Guard after you read like uh

lets say them impaling "heretic" kids on their bayonets

[vagrant fox]

wrong 👎

[storm jungle]

GUH-

[opaque coyote]

I would say more Germany SS.

Basically more "Using babies as target practice"

Yes they actually did this

[raven stone]

I mean, IIRC Gaunts Ghost novels actually HAD that, but managed to handle it well.
(As in Last and Only were horrified by their kills on finding out)

[storm jungle]

Would definitely depend on the regiment but yeah lol

same as how like

when you read Catachan you imagine them fighting orks or tyranids

not like um

killing an entire innocent rebel force and trying them to trees before gutting them

[opaque coyote]

Random Chaos Cult #193

[vagrant fox]

Bayonet snotlings to make it pg13

[storm jungle]

also that lol

[sly ivy]

That’s my fetish

[raven stone]

It is to GW’s eternal embarrassment that Krieg took off.

[storm jungle]

Gaunt's Ghosts enters that trope

only regiment thats sensible

[raven stone]

Especially the crowd they attracted.

[opaque coyote]

They're clearly chaos. Look, they're preaching things like

"Getting break days"

Horrible

[storm jungle]

They were woke....

[raven stone]

Nah, can’t forget Cain’s boys and girls either lol

[storm jungle]

tho the author for Cain said himeslf

he largely doesnt consider the books "canon"

which is funny

[sly ivy]

The guard went woke and cadia broke

[raven stone]

Somewhat sad, but they had better heads on them. Ah well.

[sly ivy]

Smdh

[opaque coyote]

Tbf Cain literally cannot even acknowledge that he's one of the "good" ones

[storm jungle]

Actually i completely forgot

its the same reason GW removed imperial suicide bombers

a bit uh too topical

[raven stone]

You cannot tell me, seriously, that some people believe this…

[vagrant fox]

I do now, GW are woke moralists

[raven stone]

No, no, they may be greedy, but certainly not preachy I think.

[vagrant fox]

Afraid of depicting a few harmless warcrimes and then saying the imperials are the bad guys smh

[opaque coyote]

Honestly Suicide Bombers are kinda impractical unless if you are severely outnumbered.

Basically only for guerilla type tactics

And the Imperium mostly does uh

"SHOOT THING WITH OVERWHELMING GUN."

I can imagine it if the Imperium is losing

Or for Regiments like Krieg.

[vagrant fox]

The Imperium has nothing if not able* bodies though

[storm jungle]

Hence why they are for penal legions

lots of bodies to waste

[opaque coyote]

Yeah that makes more sense.

"FOR THE GOD EMPERORRRR"

beep

explosion

Seriously imagine being an average Fire Warrior and seeing that type of shit

[raven stone]

I still remember the Grot guided bombs for Orks

[sly ivy]

It’s literally true they renamed it CaDEIa

[storm jungle]

to be fair

those are not human

so it works

lmao

[sly ivy]

Hired 4 administrators for every commissar

[opaque coyote]

It honestly does make me wish there WAS a completely Good Guy faction.

If only so that I can watch them be like

"What the FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU???"

[raven stone]

Rumour has it Andy Chambers, one of the ex designers behind Tau, did want T’au to be the genuine good guys. But it…well, it kind of misfired.

That, and ultimately, T’au gunboat diplomacy is an offscreen kind of evil…

[opaque coyote]

Although tbf even at their release, the T'au were never good

[raven stone]

It was a nice enough attempt to attract the Mecha/Mixed species sci fi crowd, I will at least give T’au that.

[opaque coyote]

Honestly, it's why one of my favorite fics is ironically a Star Wars and 40k Crossover one.

Essentially, a small Imperial detachment accidentally went to the Star Wars universe during the Clone Wars. And a lot of the fic is about essentially their reactions to

All of the shit

That the Imperium does

Genocides, literal death camps, etc.

The usual

And of course they're fucking horrified

[arctic talon]

Tbf the other people designing tau seem to have disagreed

[opaque coyote]

They seem to have forgotten a lot about the mixed species part

[raven stone]

Think you might like this. Different era, but still.

https://youtu.be/ExaZc5oNdWQ?feature=shared

[opaque coyote]

Which is lame

[sly ivy]

Y u tryin 2 b fair no one gets ahead that way

[opaque coyote]

Yeah that's exactly what I'm talking about

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzgscHwzoNQqL9m9zp9puZK129MN42h2c&si=5tCCor37dt1mVwA9

[arctic talon]

The imperium of man are just comically evil

[raven stone]

I am STILL WAITING, GW, FOR T’AU ALIGNED HUMAN RULES. (Sorry for all caps)

[opaque coyote]

It's a fan made video for this series

[arctic talon]

Not as comical as like

[arctic talon]

We got them in 5e

And 6e

[raven stone]

And then dropped.

Bleargh, not even a single squad.

[arctic talon]

Forgeworld made gue’la rules and no one fucking used them

[opaque coyote]

They're somewhat realistically evil?

[arctic talon]

Now granted this could be a chicken and the egg

[arctic talon]

No that’s Tau

The imperium go beyond realistic evil

[opaque coyote]

True

[arctic talon]

Imo

[opaque coyote]

At some points yes, at some other points... there's definitely some things that other regimes and shit have done that the Imperium emulates

I'd say mixed

[raven stone]

Ultimately it depends on context.

[opaque coyote]

The Dark Eldar are what I'd consider to be comically evil honestly

Like their literal goal is to

Just keep the drug torture sex party going

[stuck arrow]

"Evil a day keeps the hungry god at bay"

[raven stone]

They are Edgelords. Both literal and metaphorical.

[tight stratus]

Beyond the armies within the factions it there any chance that they add a whole new X?

Tau was by timeline the most recent newest thing that came in right?

I remember my schoolfriends back in the day being quite perterbed that they were even around all this time and just never was reported on and how unrealistic it was. (They and me were all like 12 btw so go easy on them)

[sly ivy]

The dark Eldar are dumb as shit

They’ve just decided to live in the stupidest possible way

Oh let’s make the worst of a bad situation

[opaque coyote]

And that's why I love them as a faction.

They are literally cartoon supervillains

[vagrant fox]

I guess, technically, the not-squats are the newest

[opaque coyote]

Betrayal is so common that

The wife would suspect the Husband of cheating on her if he didn't poison her wine

Hijack the chain to kill her

Etc.

"My hubby only tried to stab me in the back twice. Is he cheating on me?"

[storm jungle]

They are based af

its like saying "a guy using drugs is dumb" well yeah but he doesnt care what you think

[opaque coyote]

The Deldar aren't just a guy using drugs

The Deldar is a guy taking hard drugs

While spanking himself with a nailed in board

And moaning and screaming relentlessly in public while everybody else is like

"What the fuck?"

[storm jungle]

They kinda did a year or so ago with the Votann

[stuck arrow]

I like the Necrons. They're old, tired, there's an itch in their back that can never be scratched, and they just want everyone to get off their lawn.

[opaque coyote]

And then he turns to the nearest person and tries to get them to join even though they're screaming in fear

[sly ivy]

But a guy using drugs is literally dumb tho

[storm jungle]

bringing them out of their retconned cobweb state

[sly ivy]

Ok actually this is sounding better

[storm jungle]

I mean when said guy is a literal space elf that can kill you in like 5s and laugh about it i wouldnt say so

they are fine being where they are because they are decadent and prefer this lifestyle

[tight stratus]

gonna look up the Votann now thanks 👍

[storm jungle]

LMAO

[sly ivy]

It’s fine the spanking won me over

[storm jungle]

Die

[storm jungle]

they are very relatable

i too wanna shoot kids on my front yard

[opaque coyote]

Their society literally should not exist. It should not even function.

But somehow it does

[sly ivy]

Easy enough request to fulfill w no deadline

[storm jungle]

Its a mix of a lot of things its kinda how it functions.

[stuck arrow]

How do the torture sex drugs keep slaanesh away again?

[opaque coyote]

Refills their soul

[green loom]

Trade

[opaque coyote]

Basically Slaanesh is constantly eating it.

Torture is used to refill

[green loom]

You give it the stuff it's eating

Basically

so it doesn't eat you

[storm jungle]

None of that does, just torture.

[sly ivy]

We’ll see they engorge I mean engage the GW writers

[arctic talon]

It doesn’t

It’s good

[sly ivy]

Which prevents them from yearning so much they summon She Who Thirsts

[storm jungle]

a living being's semi psychic agony basically fills the bucket-with-a-hole that is essentially their own soul up until they need more refreshments again

its why they go on raids

[stuck arrow]

That sounds reasonable as far as 40k goes

[sly ivy]

So they’re part of a human(oid) centipede with Slaanesh at the end

That’s hot af

[storm jungle]

no

you fucking freak

[sly ivy]

yes

[storm jungle]

stop exposing yourself

[stuck arrow]

Couldn't they just go to any Hive world and soak up the ambient misery?

[sly ivy]

can’t after they take you in for it 30 or 40 times the cops just stop caring

[storm jungle]

This is basically like going:

"Why hunt a deer when you can just find one already dead mauled by some other animal"

theres no fun in that for the hunter

[storm jungle]

Basically they do it out of the thrill of the raid and the kill, they need it to live but they take sadistic joy in it immensely to the point that you kinda see why they are the way they are lol

its like trying to ask elon musk to not tweet stupid shit 30 times a day.

[opaque coyote]

It's less like that and more

The Deldar are being chased by a Bear. They're getting tired from being constantly chased, so they shove a random person into the bear's mouth so that it's distracted eating the person and they can take a breather.

[sly ivy]

Wait deldar are Elon now I like them again

[storm jungle]

https://tenor.com/view/shut-up-yakuza-can-you-shut-up-shut-your-mouth-gif-9966065835841311517

[vagrant fox]

The suffering on Terra was fine for that fellow tho

[storm jungle]

Dark Eldar giving me a Leman Russ running on batteries

[opaque coyote]

Tbf Elon would definitely be a Deldar

[storm jungle]

it explodes the moment i hit the ignition key

[storm jungle]

Hes too dumb.

he'd instantly be killed

lol

[sly ivy]

Advanced tech

[storm jungle]

Elon is more of a magos from the mechanicus who everyone kiss-asses so they dont get put in the magma bucket

[sly ivy]

Kind of ret@rded life choices