40k-lore-chat

[celest dome]

chaos in specifics basically only get codexes from chaos marines who are devoted to a god as well.
I'm confused now

[bold matrix]

Only Chaos Space Marine legions who are devoted to one specific god get a codex

[rocky gale]

Hence Emperors Children are getting a codex

[bold matrix]

Legions who are not devoted to a god or are devoted to all of them do not get a codex

[crisp heath]

what did tzeentch mean by this

[bold matrix]

the entirety of GW is just a Tzeentchian ploy
sounds about right

[fallen marsh]

Maybe. Fulgrim was teased since Gathering Storm.

[shadow plover]

They've gotten a separate index which all but confirms an upcoming codex as well

same thing happened with World Eaters

[storm jungle]

they also got removed from the last chaos codex awhile ago

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/1046914161923334214/1123609358052376706/yes.gif

Shut up bitchass.

[shadow plover]

yeah around the same time the index dropped iirc

[bold matrix]

https://tenor.com/view/ew-gif-25919594

[rocky gale]

I never noticed before but that circle stomach plate is very similar to the armour on a lot of the ogres from fantasy and AoS

[fallen plaza]

Darktide server zealot chat herald squad

[rose thorn]

https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/punchout/images/b/b2/Title_Defense_King_Hippo.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/418?cb=20090623232247

MORE KRULE BOYZZZZZ

[queen laurel]

yo

[rose thorn]

It’s probably a hobgrot hq

[queen laurel]

to be honest they deserve it

[queen laurel]

iron Jawz already got the attention last time when the bonesplitters got deleted so it's kruleboyz turn

i am quite excited on what they will bring

[fallen plaza]

These orks would make good slaves for dawi zharr

[acoustic rock]

https://tenor.com/view/warcraft-gaming-gif-27702118

[rose thorn]

The kruleboyz sell slaves to the chaos dwarves for shit like grenades all the time

It’s usually low quality or like just broken gear

And the kruelboyz give diseased or dying slaves

They are both scamming each other

[queen laurel]

is that why they usually give those grenades to the hob grots

[rose thorn]

Hob grots are usually the diplomats

So they keep the grenades for them selves

[queen laurel]

bloody runts

[rose thorn]

That’s probably for the better

Lmao

[queen laurel]

i mean Can you imagine a well placed kruleboy ambush that actually uses the grenades well

scary that

[rose thorn]

Yeha but all of these grenades are faulty

[queen laurel]

it ain't a warhammer orc if their equipment isn't faulty to some degree

[crystal forum]

why did they make it look like a character intro from super smash bros

[rose thorn]

I FUCKING KNOW ITS SO WEIRD

[queen laurel]

oh yeah i see it

[rose thorn]

I do appreciate gw pushin for blood bowl though

It’s a wonderful wonderful game

[queen laurel]

it's also very funny to me that it is the most peaceful warhammer universe

[rose thorn]

And Twitter exists in it

[queen laurel]

twerper and facetome

[rose thorn]

It’s a good game system and popular among very niche non wargamer tabletop communities

Because the starter boxes were so fucking good

It was a great board game

I found bloodbowl starter box sold at Sears lmao

Also it’s great for kitbashing

I hope we get the bloodbowl varghiests for AOS

[queen laurel]

black orcs are the shit

[rose thorn]

I love this guy

I might get him for gloomspite gitz

[queen laurel]

i will admit though i still have a soft spot for normal orc teams

[rose thorn]

Both are good

[queen laurel]

yeah they are

[rose thorn]

I saw someone just attach a sword piece to the end of the bass knuckles to make like

[queen laurel]

Varag ghoul chewer has a punching blade

[rose thorn]

Man when we had the old ard boyz and I saw a lot of kitbahses with bloodbowl stuff

[queen laurel]

yeah bloodbowl has amazing kitbash potential

like varag would make one mean megaboss

[rose thorn]

I will say

I don’t like the goblins team

It’s based off the old lore of green skins in old world

[queen laurel]

you mean the ones that relies on trolls?

[rose thorn]

Where goblins are orks with a birth defect

For being born on ‘bad earth’

[queen laurel]

the fuck

[rose thorn]

Yeah idk

[queen laurel]

that was thing

[queen laurel]

they did change it into them being a offshoot right

[rose thorn]

Yea

[queen laurel]

ok good

[rose thorn]

They are just an evolutionary difference now

[queen laurel]

much better that way to be honest

Both of them are separate at aos too

[rose thorn]

Honestly if old world wasn’t based off the planet earth

[queen laurel]

Which means that you can just run goblins without the orcs or orcs without the goblins

[rose thorn]

It would have been fine

But with that ‘bad earth’ thing it can be pretty racist

‘Of course, all the orks born in France are genetically inferior’

[queen laurel]

Even without the bad earth thing them exploiting the not born as able as they are is a bit something

[rose thorn]

Yes, they are related but aren’t the same species

Hobgoblins are belived to be different due to chaos magic

My problem is these guys look too beefy

Mot the troll

The troll is fine

I like the new ones a lot more

[queen laurel]

yeah and when they need muscle they can just call trolls

which can somehow become fireproof to magic

fun

[rose thorn]

Hi Dankhold troggoth

Why were people mad that trolls weren’t chaos??

[queen laurel]

these guys are fucked

[queen laurel]

i mean normal trolls and chaos trolls have been a thing they're just separate

so why are they complaining that trolls aren't the full chaos thing

[rose thorn]

I like the new ones alot more? But they are based more off of the modern gitz

[rose thorn]

In old world they were a full chaos thing

[queen laurel]

but green skins also employ them right

[rose thorn]

No

[queen laurel]

so me being able to recruit them is a ******* lie

[rose thorn]

Which guy are you playing in uh

TWW that lets you bring them?

[queen laurel]

Greenskins

[rose thorn]

Oh I’m a dumbass

[queen laurel]

the orcs

[rose thorn]

I forgot about

Fuckin

My bad

[queen laurel]

yeah i should've called them orcs

Greenskins are

[rose thorn]

I despise the name green skins lmao

I got confused because I was thinking of the ‘king of trolls’

Who is a chaos character

[celest dome]

That's Norsca

[rose thorn]

Yeah

[queen laurel]

what yeah as i was saying both chaos and non chaos trolls that work with orcs are a thing

[celest dome]

Throg

[queen laurel]

so why are they complaining that they're not full chaos

like they already have multiple replacements for trolls

[rose thorn]

They never really felt very chaos to me

Trolls

[rose thorn]

Also old world boomers complain about everything

[celest dome]

Troll at first were Greenskins only, then they later released Chaos Trolls

[queen laurel]

yeah they're very destruction, they eat they bash you head in and they repeat the cycle

[queen laurel]

oh yeah them

[rose thorn]

Same reason people complained wood elves didn’t have dragons

In AOS

Which also feels weird

[celest dome]

IIRC
At that time they created the distinction of Rock Troll and Chaos Trolls
Then later one made Bile Trolls, Ice Trolls and lastly Swamp Troll
(mini wise)
There are a couple of other Trolls (Lava, Sea being the known example)

[rose thorn]

The 5 trolls lived on piece until the swamp trolls attacked

[queen laurel]

oh you pink gutrippa

[rose thorn]

I think krule boyz should be able to run swamp troggoths since they can run miretroggoths

But I wouldn’t be upset if they didn’t

[celest dome]

All in all,
Chaos, Bile, Ice -> Chaos
Rock, Swamp -> Greenskins
Lava -> Wild (Get hunted by Chaos Dwarves)
Sea -> Appeared in the War of the Beasts

[queen laurel]

oh yeah always weird that is

[rose thorn]

I love it alot I really wnana buy one

[queen laurel]

normal trolls are a thing tright

[rose thorn]

Also it’s push fit so I can build it at my college

[queen laurel]

ones that have no special gimmick outside of regen

[rose thorn]

Why must we have troll racism

Troll racial profiling

[celest dome]

Rock Troll replaced it
Used to be common trolls

[queen laurel]

ok that makes sense

[rose thorn]

Wow the gw team changed the name of rules for the orruks

So the orruks betrayed kragnos and got him to trap himself in Ghyran

So all the orruk abilities that were named after kragnos or mentioned kragnos was changed

Never mind

The banna boy is still kragnos

Is it the same lore?

Yea

[queen laurel]

you mean this ?

[rose thorn]

Yeah

It’s still called power of kragnos even though it should be called something like

Banna of the wah or what ver

[queen laurel]

wait is Kragnos trapped again

[rose thorn]

In Ghyran

[queen laurel]

he got out because of the magic of bug lady

but he got trapped again

[rose thorn]

He is stomping around ghyrna

[queen laurel]

well that's a load of Grunta shit

[rose thorn]

Godrakk stopped giving a shit about him

And gobsprakk was fed up with him

Found out the Sylvaneth are trying to lure him into a trap

Somehow

Lures kragnos into said trap

[queen laurel]

and left him there

[rose thorn]

Kragnos doenst even realize he was betrayed and continues to cause issues

[rose thorn]

Yes

[queen laurel]

isn't like the last edition him literally waking up and basically fucking shit up

[rose thorn]

Also pretty sure Kragnos is the only god you can run on tabletop lore wise that is trapped in a realm

[rose thorn]

Yeah the writers got sick of him

[queen laurel]

he's literally called the god of earthquakes and the end of empires

[rose thorn]

You can run Nagash in any realm because he is a conjugation

[queen laurel]

He is a walking catastrophe so they got rid of him by throwing his *** on the realm of life

[rose thorn]

And he failed at that

He couldn’t destroy excelsis

But he brought down their wall

And apparently that’s all he wanted

[queen laurel]

I'm just like so sorry for the realm of Ghyrian it's literally being infected by nurgle now there's The Walking earthquake God just kind of there

[rose thorn]

Yes

[queen laurel]

what did the realm of life do to receive such smoke

First you infected with nurgle now you're going to throw the God of earthquakes in it

[rose thorn]

It basically disappeared off the lore for about a whole edition

[queen laurel]

what the hell did the realm do

[rose thorn]

So they might as well put something there

The Sylvaneth codex took place in Ghur in 3rd

[queen laurel]

yeah but something that can literally cause earthquakes just by walking and destroying empires?

i don't think that's a good thing to put there

[rose thorn]

It’s also trees

Forests grow over night there

And besides grey water

Everything is made of trees

[queen laurel]

they better just keep him there because i swear to god, if he somehow gets out of the realm they better commit on just letting him roam around

Kragnos is quite literally a walking disaster

[rose thorn]

Honestly I’d like him to be running around all the realms causing issues

That would be every funny meme

[queen laurel]

EXACTLY

so why trap him in the realm of life

ok at least give like destruction wizards the ability to summon him in the Lore as a projection or something

[rose thorn]

“Oh shit The e need to stop chaos fro reaching hammerhal”

KRAGNOS

But I’m not the gw writers so oh well

[queen laurel]

Like they made this entire model for him and they just decided to throw him on that realm to be trapped

[rose thorn]

He’s like, not even a god

The problem is he is too big

[queen laurel]

At least king brodd will be happy

good riddance he says

[rose thorn]

And the realm gates that are big enough to move him are in the cities of sigmar or the 8 points

[rose thorn]

He’s just a big dude

Maybe if gorkamorka really liked him and gave him teleportation it would work

[queen laurel]

it's the fact that lore wise he despises Kragnos

so he would be happy that the guy is trapped

[rose thorn]

Most of the mega gargants didn’t like him tbh

Gloomspite had a few civil wars about it

But ultimately they didn’t like him

Kruleboys are sick of him

Iron jaws don’t like him

Ogors loved him to the

Tbh*

But they also didn’t have any leadership

[queen laurel]

yeah one mega gargant even started working with chaos just to have the opportunity to kill him

[rose thorn]

Yeah

[queen laurel]

boy he is gonna be so disappointed

[rose thorn]

He got a lore update

Check his regiment of renown

He is so so so happy

[leaden pilot]

Weren't people really angry that Kragnos wasn't chaos, and specifically beastmen?

[queen laurel]

One eyed Grunnock?

[rose thorn]

Yup

[queen laurel]

yes back in the day

[rose thorn]

Honestly that’s just beastmen players begging for a named character

[queen laurel]

i can see why to be fair

like it's a giant centaur thing

[rose thorn]

Destruction players like him because he is 600 points and pretty good

[leaden pilot]

It looks really like a beastmen character

[rose thorn]

Especially because it freed the gloomspite’s faction organization regiment rule

[queen laurel]

oh yeah mags where do you read AOS lore updates and stuff

[rose thorn]

Warhammer communities

Also uh

[queen laurel]

what app is that

[rose thorn]

Otherwise when a codex releases I watch a codex review

[rose thorn]

WH AOS

It’s amazing

It’s official

Free

[queen laurel]

this?

[rose thorn]

Has all the rules for every faction

[rose thorn]

Yes

[queen laurel]

ok i will keep this in mind

[rose thorn]

100% suggest getting it

[queen laurel]

oh you pink hobgrot i'm already downloading it

i can read AOS lore stuff here that is up to date

[queen laurel]

there's 2 of them, should be the one that doesn't have the old label right

[queen laurel]

yeah there was 2 in the app store

[rose thorn]

Weird

[queen laurel]

for some reason they didn't take down the old one

[rose thorn]

Og yeha they just called the old one old

They grey scaled the old one on Apple

[rose thorn]

They left the old one to support 3.0 players, a lot of people still play the old edition until their battletomb drops

[queen laurel]

ah thats good

[rose thorn]

i still need to write my lore for my kruelboyz

[queen laurel]

i need to make my orruks more unique

[rose thorn]

honeslty you dont need ot be that unique but its always fun

the evil suns or waht ever they were called

cause so much destruciton a portal opens up

[queen laurel]

Skartoof and Azrok are good a are good already

i just need one more thing to make them more i don't know what to say

so many ideas

[queen laurel]

oh yeah the red iron jaws

they use the portal a lot if i remember

[rose thorn]

ye

[queen laurel]

ok do you think i should make Skartoof ( my iron jaw mercenary ) just ride a Grunta instead of a Maw-Grunta

[rose thorn]

can you run skartoof in ironjaws?

[queen laurel]

no he's just a written character i made

[rose thorn]

ohh

[queen laurel]

i don't play tabletop

[rose thorn]

honeslty making him ride something unique is always nice, the maw gurnta can be 2 different units or a hero

so making him rid eosmething different makes it alot easier to tell hes someone cool

[queen laurel]

there is only really three types of mounts of iron jaws

Grunta being the super strong boars

Maw-grunta the giant boars

and Maw-Krusha

I guess since he is working as a mercenary I should ground him more with grunta

but i don't think it's ridiculous to give him a giant boar as a mount

kind of torn between the choices

[rose thorn]

i really liek the maw grunta tbh

the big bore

[queen laurel]

yeah right now i stick with that but it's the fact that his companion the Morboy Azrok just rides around in a normal warboar

well normal relatively speaking

But next to a Maw-grunta that thing looks like a runt

[rose thorn]

big boss rides big bore

[queen laurel]

true he is a Boss so he get's to ride what he wants

[small grail]

cud the 11th legion or 3rd be the angry marines

these dudes

dont care if they canon or not but just sayin

[storm jungle]

Its not canon and its a cringe chapter.

its the 12 year old's idea of what astartes are too lmao

[queen laurel]

it's good chuckles the first few times, you drag it out for 20 years it becomes unbearable

[rose thorn]

'guys what if marienes angy heheh, pisss'

[crystal forum]

why the fuck is their wiki page so long

[gray umbra]

Because its a dead horse lol

[storm jungle]

^

literally nonsense upon nonsense

[gray umbra]

Its a fun idea but just nonsense

[storm jungle]

it kinda falls flat on its face once you realise Fleshtearers exist

[queen laurel]

it's the writing of a warhammer fan

[gray umbra]

"What if we had rocket launchers that shoot marines??"

[queen laurel]

it is straight up long

[crystal forum]

how could somebody put so much effort in a shitty joke

[gray umbra]

4chan

[queen laurel]

The average deranged warhammer fan

[storm jungle]

4chan

same reason theres art of them shoving guns up the asses of their enemy

or sticking them ass-to-mouth on flagpoles

[fallen plaza]

All this effort for a bit to produce a slight chuckle at best

[queen laurel]

Yeah there's also the clown marines and also the reasonable marines

[fallen plaza]

The reasonable Marines are a particularly stupid one

[storm jungle]

thats another case of "this already exists"

ala Raptors lol

who literally use camouflage

[queen laurel]

i love the fact that having common sense is heresy

[storm jungle]

its not even common sense

its just people as ever not reading lore

[queen laurel]

Yeah I was like why genuinely

why do you guys make this if you know raptors exist

[storm jungle]

because they dont read

[fallen plaza]

Another thing that grinds my gears

[queen laurel]

i don't read warhammer much but even i can manage learning the truth

[fallen plaza]

Is when redditors get smug about the fact of "erm, actually krieg doesn't actually fight with shovels"

[storm jungle]

Whats wrong with that one

[fallen plaza]

Like do you guys read the lore literally?

[storm jungle]

They dont 💀

[fallen plaza]

I find it stupid because there's no reason that they cant

[gray umbra]

Somethingsomething ww1 aesthetic

Trench warfare all the time

[spring cairn]

it's like any soldier ever, they'll probably end up fighting with their shovel only if it's the last/closest thing they can use

[outer wave]

It's not so much that they can't, it's more so that some people (at least formerly) thought they were always fighting with shovels or it was exclusive to them

[crisp heath]

Me omw to invest in gas mask stock watching the kriegs get deployed (1 morbillion casualties)

Idk I always thought the Elysian jump troops were the coolest dudes ever

[outer wave]

I love the grungy look of the more dubious regiments like Chem dogs

But I also like the Mordian Guard cuz very prettied up boys and gals

[crystal forum]

valhallans

is all i need to say

[rocky gale]

No match for Vostroyan drip

[outer wave]

^

I do like me some space Cossacks

[opaque coyote]

Although their main ship name is genius

"Litany of Litany's Litany"

Perfection

[rocky gale]

"Recently, however, this has been changed so that if a family's eldest child is female, she will be required to join the Firstborn as well."

Based

[queen laurel]

If we're talking favorite drip then i shall with go the Vitrian Dragoons

[storm jungle]

GW retconning bad old sexist lore is always good

[opaque coyote]

ZAMN

[crisp heath]

Were these guys only in gaunts book?

[storm jungle]

Yep

[crisp heath]

The dragoons?

[opaque coyote]

HE GOT DA DRIP

[crisp heath]

They were straight real ones the entire time

[opaque coyote]

I love how the armor is scaled

Although I have to wonder

How tf do they make it

[crisp heath]

Are there any guard units that are filled with nobles/very well funded guards

[storm jungle]

Yes, quite a few

[storm jungle]

Vintrillians, Volpone, etc

[opaque coyote]

Oh wow.

Camouflage

Camoflauge

Camo

FUCK

[storm jungle]

[opaque coyote]

They hide good

[queen laurel]

camouflage

[opaque coyote]

[crisp heath]

c

[queen laurel]

so you're right

[opaque coyote]

yippee

[crisp heath]

(The rest of the word is hidden)

[queen laurel]

a bit

[queen laurel]

oh yeah so the dragoons appear literally nowhere else other than the gaunt series?

[rocky gale]

Royal Volpone are also pretty based

[opaque coyote]

That is sad

[outer wave]

Fuckin' dragon slayer regiment

[rocky gale]

Why shouldn't every guardsman have a manservant accompany them to carry their reloads

[opaque coyote]

That would be sick as an army

...

But I also realize it would be painful to paint

[queen laurel]

@storm jungle this is supposed to be a part of like a full image collection of guardsmen right

do you have the full thing

[dusk patrol]

It’s from a Sabbat Wars book

[rocky gale]

Royal Volpone are genuinely one of the more fucked up guard regiments, they literally have slaves accompanying them into battle to carry their extra gear and these Mil-serves are forbidden from touching a weapon and if they do they'll be punished by being whipped to death

[dusk patrol]

They’re servants but

Yeah

[storm jungle]

Its from a sabbat wars book

it was released awhile ago

you can find most images from it online

[dusk patrol]

It’s rich people being soldiers that have servants it’s hilarious

[storm jungle]

They are basically slaves lol

literally down to beatings

[opaque coyote]

Reminds me of how Romans/Greek soldiers used to have slaves around to carry their gear

[rocky gale]

Yea like the Spartan Helots

[opaque coyote]

"Don't call them slaves. They're servants!"

"You just whipped one for being too slow."

"Doesn't the Mechanicus also do that."

"...for their slaves yeah. Also the fact that you're bringing up the Mechanicus isn't a good look."

"Well they should've just been better!"

sigggghh

[arctic talon]

they're just called slaves/menials/thralls

by the mechanicus

lol

[storm jungle]

its semantics yeah

[hallow plover]

Human resources

How grim

[dusk patrol]

The best this is that gold on his armor? Auramite gilding.

[opaque coyote]

Okay I have to admit

He has some brilliant drip

[queen laurel]

That looked interesting to read until I saw who made it

[dusk patrol]

It’s ok

One of his better books imo

[opaque coyote]

Tbh I wonder if there's someone in the Imperium that's basically John Brown

Basically trying to free the slaves

Aggressively

[dusk patrol]

It happens

They tend to die

Its a massive intergalactic empire with a million worlds and quadrillions of people

[paper haven]

90 percent of Guard deploymments are to put down rebellions

[storm jungle]

More than likely.

[rocky gale]

😳

[opaque coyote]

I mean I would say Angron but his story is more Spartacus and he was gonna fail before the Emperor uh

...saved him without consent

[dusk patrol]

Theres gonna be everything

[opaque coyote]

[storm jungle]

yeah those are the 30k dudes

they got a ton of fur hats

[fallen plaza]

We know what happened to angron

[opaque coyote]

No you don't

I stole the information from your mind

[fallen plaza]

Something c#dia can never have, swag.

[dusk patrol]

Angron also didn’t care about anything past his small group

[paper haven]

Nuceria is one oof Guilliman's planets. Are we gonna ignore that Guilliman probably knew what was going on?

[dusk patrol]

Guilliman was and is fine with slavery

And also at the time it wasn’t

[opaque coyote]

At the time it wasn't

And also Guilliman doesn't care about cruelty that much

He does care if it's inefficient

[dusk patrol]

He’s nicer, he’s still a genocidal warlord

[storm jungle]

Guilliman pretty much says if he could he'd leave it all behind he would, go on a farmstead, and not care about anything and live his life. The issue is this is never an option to him.

[fallen plaza]

Lokens reaction to the outrage of his massacre when escorting the dying warmaster is a good perspective of how most superhumans view the world

[dusk patrol]

He’s still fine with servitors and slaves in ships pulling chains and all that shit

[opaque coyote]

Being a good person in 40k ranges from

"Improbable" to "Impossible"

[fallen plaza]

You do realise your accidentally saying pro slavery talking points?

[queen laurel]

How many of the superhuman demigods wanted to do that

[fallen plaza]

Slaves aren’t efficient

[dusk patrol]

Depends on how much you care about life

And life is cheap in the imperium

[fallen plaza]

They are inherently backwards

[dusk patrol]

It’s very much evil though

[opaque coyote]

Kinda trying to view it in a 40k lens

So yeah.

Yes it is evil and backwards

And no I don't actually support slavery

[storm jungle]

Slavery has no reason to exist in any form or shape, even in fiction.

and even at a cold pragmatic lens as said above its simply not efficient

[opaque coyote]

Yup

But Guilliman doesn't care cause he's literally a warlord

Just

[queen laurel]

yes it's a cruel way to make society move

[opaque coyote]

A nicer one

[storm jungle]

Guilliman is Guilliman yeah

[opaque coyote]

That also knows how to do taxes

[storm jungle]

its also impossible to put into scope the amount of atrocities that go on in every single imperial world.

[fallen plaza]

Read a book next time instead of quoting memes nerd

[storm jungle]

its not like WHF or AOS where these places can be liberated and people can actually go to proper safe havens

[queen laurel]

yeah no matter how much of a good leader you are you can't save everyone

[rocky gale]

She's apparently a Discipline Master, I wish she'd discipli.......

[storm jungle]

also yeah the original concept is from Blanche

hence the whip and BDSM themes

chad

[opaque coyote]

Literally everywhere is some type of crime against humanity

[fallen plaza]

Shes basically an early commissar, so she’s probably kill you

[opaque coyote]

If you're an imperial citizen

[storm jungle]

She wouldnt have a whip if that was the case so nah

flogging first

depends on Da Crime

[opaque coyote]

Going out to buy the groceries has fucking atrocities everywhere

[fallen plaza]

I mean

[storm jungle]

the grocery-bot is a servitor who was a mom of like 3

[fallen plaza]

Its like real life, but like slightly worse

[storm jungle]

"slightly"

lol

[queen laurel]

and the new employee died because a gang member decided to shoot him for fun

[opaque coyote]

...

So basically just cashiers irl got i-

[storm jungle]

Not too far off

but yeah if Musk and Bezos could make us all servitors they would

[queen laurel]

you are not that far off

[fallen plaza]

I mean

[storm jungle]

no

[queen laurel]

I would say don't give him ideas but knowing how they work they probably thought of it already. the chip was just the first step

[storm jungle]

Yeah he prob already thought of it

mechanical human enslavement is not really that far off

lol

[fallen plaza]

Ya’ll remember the indians checking your groceries in the amazon grocery?

I think thats pretty close

[storm jungle]

Not even.

As a person that lived in poverty for a bit any menial job IRL is better than half the shit in the Imperium

id rather slave away at a cashier then get my brains splattered open by an overseer for missing a quota

[fallen plaza]

Hey, maybe you’ll break new ground and become a space marine

[queen laurel]

yeah even the most basic cleaning has the chance of you getting packed up

[fallen plaza]

Diller, first woman marine

[queen laurel]

swiping the floor and immediately i got shot in the leg and got decapitated

because i was cleaning the wrong place at the wrong time

[opaque coyote]

Seriously though. Depending on where you live. You probably have to casually walk through gang wars.

And I don't mean like a regular shootout.

I mean like an entire urban battle.

You probably have to walk through like 5 blocks of gangs shooting at each other, throwing grenades, etc.

[storm jungle]

The fuck does that even mean lol

[fallen plaza]

Climbing the ladder

[storm jungle]

i learned that playing GTA SA im sure im prepared for it

[storm jungle]

[fallen plaza]

[opaque coyote]

Actually I kinda want to write a short fic where it's literally just a hiver going to grab the groceries

It would be funny

[fallen plaza]

You sure you haven’t already?

[storm jungle]

avoiding enforcer patrols and gang shootouts

just like detroit

https://tenor.com/view/detroit-driveby-eminem-gif-24008106

[opaque coyote]

Nah

It needs to be longer

[fallen plaza]

We need xmen but 40k so we can make funny race allegories

[queen laurel]

i don't think a gangster with a nine mil can be compared to a guy that can cut through an entire cow with a giant chainsaw axe

[storm jungle]

I dont know man

CJ is built different

[queen laurel]

true

[storm jungle]

guy has done things in that game tactical marines do in every deployment

[fallen plaza]

Welcome to san Andreas im cj from groove street

[storm jungle]

💀

https://tenor.com/view/cat-with-green-bandana-scarf-gta-grove-street-animated-men-guys-standing-around-cat-gif-25836123

[opaque coyote]

Imagine a GTA game taking place in a Hive City

[storm jungle]

I mean SA takes place in Los Angeles

not that far off

[opaque coyote]

True

[storm jungle]

[opaque coyote]

Imagine getting 5 stars and you get into a shoot out with the Adeptus Arbites

Actually how would the star system work for a theoretical 40k Gta

[storm jungle]

Uhh it would depend

at first the response would be enforcers

then it would ramp up to arbites

if we are going as far as "army wanted level" then probably PDF

[opaque coyote]

I guess the full 5* just be PDF

[storm jungle]

thats kinda all the response units a planet has when you exclude local establishments

[opaque coyote]

Although a part of me thinks it would be funny if in like a theoretical higher difficulty.

The star system switches to having fucking Space Marines

Despite it violating a lot of lore

If only because it would be really funny

robs a store

Droppods suddenly rain down

[queen laurel]

gets five stars

Deploying BaneBlade

the imagery is funny

[storm jungle]

Lmao

[winter vessel]

it looks like its about to pull a sick drift

[opaque coyote]

I think depending on where you are in the hive. The star response would be different

Like for the underhive, the maximum is arbites

Upper

Probably get the pdf

[gray umbra]

Imperial land speeders must be fun as fuck

[opaque coyote]

I would love to have a lasgun irl

[storm jungle]

GTA V has one

kinda

that broken hoverbike lol

[opaque coyote]

I know this sounds stupid

Actually nvm it is quite stupid

But could you possibly make bullet hole (or IG explosion hole) Graffiti using a bolter

It would the most stupid improper use for it

...

[queen laurel]

the notorious Oppressor Mk II

[opaque coyote]

Or would the shell just like

Be disabled halfway through

[fallen plaza]

😁

[opaque coyote]

Malcador

[storm jungle]

You can essentially make that with any small-arm weapon

[opaque coyote]

Would be hard to be precise with it tho

Cause the Bolter is basically a mini missile launcher

[fallen plaza]

Hey

Hey apple

[opaque coyote]

Honestly when I first learned about it

I just imagined like

A bunch of hooded Malcadors held together into the shape of a tank

[winter vessel]

I always compared them to a beefed out version of a USAS-12 or an AA12

[fallen plaza]

You couldn't hear me but I was laughing at your joke, totally was.

[opaque coyote]

It wasn't a joke tho

It was actually what went through my brain

[storm jungle]

Laati you can just shoot him in the face

[opaque coyote]

Just a bunch of Malcadors glued together

[opaque coyote]

Waste of ammo

[storm jungle]

DAMN

[opaque coyote]

Will stab him later

[storm jungle]

[fallen plaza]

Baby steps my man, try approaching a McDonald's cashier first

https://youtu.be/aSPZd9z3v5Y?si=doVenOd8vUQ4WF4f

I found your first attempt

[spring cairn]

Thanks god for the MLPAutismChannel

where would we be without it

[celest dome]

Sometime I feel bad for the creator of MLP

Like damn, you went and made a quite popular thing but then you get those fans

[storm jungle]

man kinda sounds familiar

[celest dome]

Nah, GW can go and eat shit

[queen laurel]

Gw can jump in a pit of spikes and get marinated in the blood of a honey badger

[gray umbra]

Does anyone know why mlp created such a cult following

Or is it exactly what i think it is

[young pecan]

Ever since I learned the evil part of Salamanders I look at comments glazing them like 😔 You poor ignorant thing

[rocky gale]

Never watched it myself, but from what I gather it was genuinely just a good show that attracted an older audience than it was meant for and eventually things just got weird

[young pecan]

Probably that it's got a really big identity from what I gather

[gray umbra]

I just assumed it was sexual

[rocky gale]

Some people made it that way, but I don't think it was that originally

and in a lot of spaces it still isn't

It's just the sexual aspect of it is one of the "weirdest" groups so it's the one people online focus on

[arctic talon]

Glaze them even if you know the flaws

[queen laurel]

One of those weird phenomena

Where the show is innocent but the fandom is brutal

Like the loud house for example

Uh

Funny bunch they are

[misty vector]

Bluey got a bunch of adults watching it too

[rocky gale]

Again, the internet always finds a way to focus on the weirdest parts of the fandom and act like they're the default

Bluey is another one, like it's just a good comforting and slightly education show designed for kids and parents, so a lot of people got attached to it.

[young pecan]

Fair nuff, they're still my favorite chapter next to the Lamenters(?) the really unlucky dudes

[opaque coyote]

Honestly I don't go to McDonald's cause the food is like

The closest thing to just eating like

Pure matter

Like their burgers and fries do not taste good

It is literally two steps away from Imperium Food

I am gonna be honest here

And I like fast food too so

At least their breakfast tastes good

[dense dawn]

What evil side

Salamanders are all good

[arctic talon]

[young pecan]

They're supposedly racist to people from different continents on their own planet

Slurs and all

[dense dawn]

Okay

[young pecan]

"based" we say in unison

[dense dawn]

And?

[arctic talon]

Beyond that they also still burn people alive and are part of the imperium

I can think of numerous ways I’d rather go out then being burned alive

[young pecan]

I thought they mostly dealt with chaos so it's not reaaally a huge deal?

But yeah true

[arctic talon]

I mean

The third company

Is literally meant for putting down revolts

[dense dawn]

Hell yeah

[arctic talon]

And they do it with a lot of fire

[spring cairn]

dissidents aren't people

[arctic talon]

LOL

[spring cairn]

so it's okay

[dense dawn]

Exactly

This guy gets it

[young pecan]

https://tenor.com/view/think-bro-gif-22403438

[arctic talon]

I’m sure those kids had it coming for their parents uh

Protesting for better work hours

[spring cairn]

communists scum

[dense dawn]

Ugh

[storm jungle]

Ok jeff bezos

[spring cairn]

these socialists infiltrators are trying to topple the imperium with their "rights to water" and "humane working conditions"

[rose thorn]

Hello team what did I miss

[storm jungle]

they will pee in those bottles and like it

https://tenor.com/view/forza-horizon4-amazon-delivery-amazon-delivery-drivers-when-they-get-a-same-day-delivery-at2359-1159pm-gif-22248180

[dense dawn]

Warhammer:

[storm jungle]

Shoo back to r/grimdank

[rose thorn]

[dense dawn]

Yaaa

Niye amk

[storm jungle]

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/735819155608961044/1041120147945050232/image0.gif

[spring cairn]

https://tenor.com/view/dwarf-thorgrim-warhammer-total-war-gif-14786796

[arctic talon]

Lol

[dense dawn]

That's going in the book, Umgi

[arctic talon]

The book of grudges survived the endtimes

Somehow

[spring cairn]

hate wins !

[dense dawn]

It's going in ALL OF THEM

[arctic talon]

LOL

[rose thorn]

all the dwarf factions have their own version of it too its great

[opaque coyote]

"Human Rights? Yeah Brother Rights is certainly human ."

Burns down peaceful protest

[dense dawn]

Also is that a channel?

[rose thorn]

The Kharadons have it as their law to hate a select list of people in the book

[opaque coyote]

• Brother Lefts of the 3rd Company

[arctic talon]

It’s Reddit

[rose thorn]

It is a criminal activity to not try to murder these people

[dense dawn]

Peaceful protests?
All I saw were heretics

[storm jungle]

hes talking about greeks FYI

[rose thorn]

📸

[dense dawn]

Oh

[dense dawn]

If I didn't want that shit seen I wouldn't do it 🗿

[opaque coyote]

Ancient Greece is proof that you can be so gay that you're sexist.

[dense dawn]

Trueee

Turbo gay

[storm jungle]

you dont need to hide it

no one in here does

[spring cairn]

the turks are multiplying, like single celled organisms they are undergoing mitosis

[storm jungle]

yeah uh

thats how humans multiply innit

[dense dawn]

Hide what

[storm jungle]

You know what i mean

[dense dawn]

No I don't

[storm jungle]

yes you do

[dense dawn]

I'm already aware I'm bi

[storm jungle]

damn it

[dense dawn]

I'm not a homophobe fam

I just like to call Greeks turbo gay

[opaque coyote]

Because they kinda are

[dense dawn]

Well... The ottoman empire

https://tenor.com/view/взгляд-2000-ярдов-война-war-soldier-gif-3632617944134077161

[spring cairn]

i think u greeks and turks should just stop fighting and make out

[dense dawn]

Who said we don't

[opaque coyote]

Exorcists be like

[rose thorn]

i wonder how the old world repersented the turkish actually

[opaque coyote]

I have half convinced that if Greece and Turks were people.

They would hate fuck everyday

[dense dawn]

Greece an opp/pookie

[rose thorn]

the badlands

thanks british company

please never make historical parody again

[dense dawn]

That's hilarious

[rose thorn]

lets check my homestate idaho

which has some of the largest indigenous populations on that side of the us

chaos beasts

thanks british company

[dense dawn]

What flavor of nerd are you people

Me personally I pray to our holy God emperor 5 times a day

[rocky gale]

Pretty based to make an entire Empire based off a single piece of furniture ngl

[rose thorn]

JIASHHAHHS

[dense dawn]

It's not our naming tho

Much like turkey

[rocky gale]

Ah yes, the great transition from furniture to bird, also based

[dense dawn]

Either way I don't wanna talk about the ottoman empire

[dense dawn]

Osmanlı is a family name

The uh

One of the tribes

Again ion wanna talk about it

They did some fucked up stuff

[rose thorn]

wasnt the bird being named turkey an inside joke?

[dense dawn]

Yeah pretty much

It's called Türkiye

[rocky gale]

That's fine, I'm aware of the history. I'm just memeing

[dense dawn]

Like
Land of the Türks

[dense dawn]

It's cool breh

[opaque coyote]

Fun fact

Some Serbian dude decided to shove a glass bottle up their ass in 1985. He had to waddle to the hospital. When asked why there was broken glass in there. He falsely said that two Albanian people did it.

This caused worsening ethnic tensions between Kosovo's Serbian and Albanian populations and may have directly inspired Yugoslavia to break up

[dense dawn]

One man one jar before one man one jar

[opaque coyote]

The glass bottle balkanized inside him

[dense dawn]

Thatsfoul

The oggreactions are a blessing

[opaque coyote]

Fr

[viral halo]

one man one jar died this year in Ukraine

kinda crazy to think about

[dense dawn]

Was he ukranian?

[spring cairn]

this was the moment I realized that

war was indeed

le bad

[viral halo]

yes

he got 'd

[dense dawn]

I realised that when one of the stalker devs went KIA

[dense dawn]

God dammit

Now 2 of my favorite ukranian people have died

[spring cairn]

https://tenor.com/view/snake-anger-mgsv-gif-12596324

[opaque coyote]

Honestly I was surprised that Stalker 2 wasn't cancelled

[dense dawn]

After this many delays

It's basically cancelled

Shit I've lost hope on it

[opaque coyote]

They did release new trailers

And even a gameplay one recently

[opaque coyote]

Honestly I don't mind if it was

Like I would be sad

But like

It's a literal war there

[dense dawn]

I mean

We still got chernobylite

But it's kinda ass

[opaque coyote]

I haven't heard much talk about it

[opaque coyote]

At least Anomaly exists

[dense dawn]

I'm sick of playing gamma brk

Finna play stalcraft till stalker 2 comes out

[opaque coyote]

Tbh I feel that Gamma and Anomaly don't accurately capture the spirit of Stalker if that makes any sense?

Like Stalker is more about the world

It's not even really that much of a survival game

To be honest

And I know I am gonna get shot for this

The gameplay is closer to Fallout than it is to a survival game

Yeah Hunger and Thirst exists. But it was

Never important

[dense dawn]

The thing about gamma is that it has no story

You're nobody

That makes it more immersive for me

[opaque coyote]

Yeah it's basically a survival game where you just wander around the zone

Pretty cool

[dense dawn]

Since I'm a part of the environment

[opaque coyote]

I prefer Anomaly because I like picking up guns tho

[dense dawn]

Anomaly is pretty fun too

[opaque coyote]

I mean Gamma is a fork of Anomaly

[dense dawn]

I usually just spawn in duty base and clear it

[opaque coyote]

Which is a fork of another mod

Which is a fork of another mod

Which i

[dense dawn]

Yeah yea I get it

Also there's this stalker inspired mmorpg coming out

Pioner

[opaque coyote]

Yippee?

[dense dawn]

Shit looks firr

[opaque coyote]

I hope it ain't p2w

[dense dawn]

I'm pretty sure it ain't

Do you know stalcraft?

[opaque coyote]

Ye

[dense dawn]

Yeah basically that

But not shitty

[opaque coyote]

Neat

[dense dawn]

It also has a stalcraft dev working on it

Which Idk if is a good thing or not

But my money is on that game for now

[storm jungle]

isnt like most of Stalker 2 delays due to the war lol

which is also extremely understandable

[rocky gale]

Dunno if anyone knows about Geoff "Incontrol" Robinson, but he was a streamer, an Esports player, coach and commentator for StarCraft who was very big in the community and was also a massive Warhammer fan that I spoke with a couple of times and who was very responsible for getting me into Warhammer, TTRPG's and D&D, he unfortunately died about 5 years ago and I'd always wondered what happened to his Warlord Titans because he was always very proud of them, turns out one of them is enshrined at his local games store with a memorial for him and the other was buried with him in his casket.

[storm jungle]

Lmao nice.

a lot better than his family selling them off like one story i heard

[opaque coyote]

Again I wouldn't mind if it was cancelled

Like obviously I don't want it to be cancelled

But like

Yeah it's a war

If it's cancelled fine

Hope the devs are safe btw

[gray umbra]

You mean you dont like getting stomped by a +15 icebreaker +15 vector gigachad with meta vit artifacts

[shell mason]

yo

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C_IWaFZBlW-/?igsh=MXhocW0xNTRwZnB2Zg==

[crystal forum]

me playing with my pintle heavy bolter guy pretending im shooting swarms of xenos with an automatic grenade launcher type of weapon

astra militarum pintle options:
-heavy stubber
-storm bolter

space marine pintle options:
-multi melta

[viral halo]

I genuinely don’t believe stalker 2 is coming out, like ever. It’s basically just war donations at this point and nothing will be refunded bc they’ll claim HQ got hit or something.

Just remember every war thunder purchase is bullets for Russia to use

[storm jungle]

NO

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

https://tenor.com/view/british-cop-screaming-screaming-sad-gif-1879411192175791821

[rocky gale]

https://tenor.com/view/space-marines-gif-12025585

It's Blood Angeling time

[winter vessel]

Target employees readying to give customer service to ungrateful guests:

[soft thunder]

Is it in season to hate ultramerns for being too popular and the core piece of all GW marketing materials, again?

[rose thorn]

read the text

[soft thunder]

idk how to

ah blud marines

[rose thorn]

Can’t believe Titus is a blood angel

[gray umbra]

tacticus gives me mixed feelings

[dense dawn]

Ah yes
Cock and ball torture, my favorite

[fallen plaza]

[opaque coyote]

Can't believe Titus is a blood raven

...

Actually that explains why he casually steals the Vengeance Launcher

And the Stalker Bolter, the Melta, the Lascannon

You basically steal a lot from the armories tbh

Hell you replace your bolt Pistol with a plasma one

[fallen plaza]

Blood Raven stealing is meme lore

[crystal forum]

minotaurs prob steal more than them

also i am bad at painting

[opaque coyote]

I think it's lore in DoW only basically?

Although stealing happens a lot in some of the more shrewd SM chapters

Like Minotaurs also steal like what Gay Jay said

One of the most on the nose things is the Pistol of Baal description from Dawn of War II:

The crimson teardrop icon of the Blood Angels chapter is carved into the grip of this Mk III bolt pistol. Blood Raven armorers claim this dates from a ceremonial exchange of arms between the two chapters in M37. Blood Angel archivists have no records of any such exchange.

The inferno of Baal description:

First crafted on the Blood Angels home world of Baal, it is uncertain how this flamer came into the hands of the Blood Ravens artificers or why it was modified to mix toxic chemicals with promethium.

It's a game only thing so it's probably not canon

However

It is really fucking funny

If we ever get a game where we play as the Minotaurs. We should have these type of descriptions for relics

[arctic talon]

The Minotaurs should just have a date it was stolen lol

Stole M.38

[opaque coyote]

"The difference between you and me Brother is this."

"You steal and try to hide it."

"I steal without fear of consequences."

[arctic talon]

The Minotaurs are literally a bunch of school yard bullies it’s so good lol

[opaque coyote]

"Commander?"

"Yes Soldier?"

[rose thorn]

And they get paid by the government

[opaque coyote]

"We got Minotaur and Blood Raven reinforcements. And now all of our armory is gone."

[arctic talon]

Moms credit card

[opaque coyote]

"Yeah that's to be expected. Don't worry soldier. They most likely won't steal the Lasguns."

"Most likely??"

[arctic talon]

Honestly one of the best parts of the second space marine codex in 7e was the Minotaurs getting bodied for once

Like they got their asses beaten so badly by the death guard they ran back to terra to get help

[opaque coyote]

The Blood Ravens are focused on finding relics. Like if it even has a hint of once belonging to them

They'll probably get it

[arctic talon]

The blood ravens are pack rats

[opaque coyote]

So stealing is not off the table

[arctic talon]

The Minotaurs are thieves and bullies

[opaque coyote]

And the Minotaurs literally just

Steal because they want to

[arctic talon]

*they have the right to

[opaque coyote]

Again I fully believe the theory that they're loyalist Iron Warriors

It definitely fits

[plush mason]

and they are a fleet based chapter with no direct access to a forge world, so most of their resources they have to beg borrow or steal

[opaque coyote]

Also we should be able to play as one of the more asshole chapters tbh

[arctic talon]

I’m sure there will be dlc

[opaque coyote]

It would be funny

[arctic talon]

In space marine 2 lol

You can already do marines malevolent

[opaque coyote]

Yeah we already got a lot of chapters

[arctic talon]

The issue is getting the emblem

Lol

[opaque coyote]

YES

[opaque coyote]

...

Fitting for them

[plush mason]

well the minotuars are confirmed in sm2

[opaque coyote]

Assholes even when you want to become them

[plush mason]

but afaik its all just cosmetic and the space marine inside is just an ultramarine

[opaque coyote]

Unfun tbh

If we ever get voicelines. We should have unique ones for some chapters

[plush mason]

they have voice lines

[arctic talon]

Their scheme is easy to do tbf

https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/warhammer40k/images/0/0d/Mark_VII_Brother.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20160525202406

[plush mason]

its how we know each class in the pve multiplayer is a named marine

[opaque coyote]

grab bronze paint

[opaque coyote]

Also SM1 had guardsmen and civilians around

We couldn't shoot them

I hope SM2 allows you to truly embrace

And shoot them

For like no reason

Like there should be no incentive. You should just be able to

Do it

Here are the reasons why

1. We are space Marines. It can be lore accurate.

2. It would be really funny

[shell mason]

mhm

[opaque coyote]

The Marine's Malevolent colorscheme kinda is

idk

I don't even know whether it's good or bad

it does look like piss tho

[arctic talon]

ew

why is that one metalic

[fallen plaza]

I kinda like it ngl

[arctic talon]

I prefer the non metalic one ngl

[fallen plaza]

Reminds me of 30k imperial fist

[opaque coyote]

Also I think the Tsons are pretty much the only Traitor Chapter that got a glowup look wise post-Heresy

Oh and also the Word Bearers

[fallen plaza]

Uh, wrong.

The red is cooler in every way

[opaque coyote]

blue better

it look cool

[fallen plaza]

It's gay and lame

Mods, smack his nuts

[opaque coyote]

https://tenor.com/view/wes-fall-to-knees-scream-gif-27602552

[opaque coyote]

Nuhuh

[winter vessel]

We are so close to SM2’s release

[shell barn]

Tempestus Scion armor or any Stormtrooper in general will never not go hard

I love this so much

[crystal forum]

i am going to get every single skin in this game

i am NOT missing this shit

dont forget this shitty one

[shadow plover]

There's also that WH+ skin

[crystal forum]

i was JUST about to mention this

grand conspiracy

it has a fucking chain

[fallen plaza]

That powerfist looks ass though

[crystal forum]

ye it's the ugliest shade of purple

but i could maybe make it work as soul drinker

[fallen plaza]

It's blue tho

[crystal forum]

the white band is gross though

it's purple

[fallen plaza]

No it's blue

[crystal forum]

it's twitch purple

[fallen plaza]

[crystal forum]

wait but both are called the same thing

yet the twitch one has chain

the mystery deepens

https://drops.spacemarine-2.com/

this explains it better i guess

[fallen plaza]

Look at this beauty

Would fit in right with an imperial milltia

[winter vessel]

This looks like something I’d see in a Studio Ghibli film

[fallen plaza]

This is a Hayao Miyazaki design

[winter vessel]

I knew it. In every bit of his work, when comes to metallic structures or shapes, it has a bulbous design to it

[crystal forum]

it looks like it got cartoonishly overfilled with water

just like how my ear is currently overfilled with fluid

[opaque coyote]

Balls Tank

[fallen plaza]

[opaque coyote]

Mal

Cador

I wonder if the Imperium have like

Giant city size tanks or something

Lemme check

[fallen plaza]

They do

Colossus Imperialis

I think is the name

[opaque coyote]

So looking at the Lexicanium