What do I do

[rotund mantle]

So there’s this friend of mine called vay, like I said at the start me and my boyfriend know that we won’t cheat on eachother but have this jealousy think I assume because of things in the past
He wanted me to distance from him throughout our relationship, and I did that
A couple days after our breakup, I joined a server n its like an old server that was filled w my friends but then some drama happened n I got banned but I rejoined
Vay was there, n then vay dmed me
And we talked again as friends n I said that I missed talking to him because he was a close friend of mine
We started calling a bit like maybe 30 mins~ an hour maybe? Not everyday maybe every other day but theres also days in a row where we don’t talk
And I always ranted about my boyfriend, how much I missed and loved him and how much I just wanted to be with him
Vay liked another girl, and she used him and I comforted him.
the whole thing is that, because I was nice to him, calling him a bit often, saying imyt/ilyt a couple of times, venting to him and or him venting to me, him giving me advise sometimes or agreeing with me that my boyfriend is a jerk sometimes, and yk the girl thing where you say oh I hate my ex oh I hate my bf he’s an asshole n then the next second you say you miss him
Yeah he said I cheated on him and I just I don’t understand at all
I understand I shouldn’t have said ilyt or imyt, but theres this thing with vay that he’s too kind, I’ve talked to one of my girl friends today and she said the same, he says imy and ily and always means it platonically, he views me as an older sister

But yeah basically yesterday me and my boyfriend called after two weeks of us being messy, not calling, not actually spending good time together, we finally did, we called for hours and played video games together
Then I streamed and he wanted to see my chats with vay, and I showed him everything, and as I started he says I cheated on him because I did all of that.
He blocked me everywhere, then I sent emails and he unblocked me on discord and I tried talking to him I tried telling him its not cheating I understand it’s disrespectful and it wasn’t my intent, and he was just insulting me all night calling me a cheating whore/slut saying that I should kill myself or hurt myself saying that theres 2-3 ppl that like him irl and hed fuck each one, saying that if we got back together he’d use every chance to cheat on me
And I tried to talk to him I tried telling him to stop, I know that all of that is toxic and he can’t just say that but I do think he really thought I cheated in some way and was extremely angry at me and didn’t mean all of that, he just said things in the heat of the moment which is no excuse
So I sent him a text last night and this morning, saying how I wouldn’t throw our relationship over a random guy online and just yk telling him I love him and I didn’t cheat nor would I ever
I haven’t gotten a reply but im not blocked, and I know that he saw my messages because i went on an alt on tiktok and saw that he reposted some videos

Can someone please reply?

[shadow bear]

So let me get this straight . You told another man that you miss him while being in a relationship ?

Did you ever date vay in your life ?

[rotund mantle]

ik it looks bad yes I said imyt a couple once or twice

[rotund mantle]

nope we’ve known eachother for two years

Nothing like that happened

[shadow bear]

What is imyt

[rotund mantle]

I miss u too

[shadow bear]

So you missed him as a friend

[rotund mantle]

yes

It was always platonic with him it never meant anything

[shadow bear]

Okay then you really have to try your best to explain him that

[rotund mantle]

we never dated nor would we ever, we had chances to but never did

[rotund mantle]

I’m trying but he’s not listening man

he ignored my texts today n hes just on TikTok

I know he saw my texts atleast

[shadow bear]

He won’t be able to ignore you forever

[rotund mantle]

I mean that’s true

I just don’t get why he like

made it so bad in a way

[shadow bear]

After some days he’ll respond probably. I mean how long were y’all dating

[rotund mantle]

like calling it cheating

[rotund mantle]

8-9 months and we met up irl twice

I just don’t understand why hed think I’d throw away our relationship for a random guy online

[shadow bear]

Well if you look at his perspective it’s very sus . I wouldn’t call it outright cheating but still

If he trusted you he would try to understand

[rotund mantle]

I know and I understand that it’s disrespectful and weird but me and his intentions were never bad

he liked another girl

And was venting to me about her

And I was venting to him about my boyfriend

Well technically ex now but idk

I did apologise to him and acknowledged what I did was disrespectful and maybe micro cheating

Just not cheating

I could and would never love anyone except him

I never did either

I never did anything to be inappropriate or unfaithful

[shadow bear]

If he hasn’t blocked you yet on everything then give it time

You can’t do anything else tbh

[rotund mantle]

He’s blocked me everywhere except here, I’m suprised that he didn’t block me again

Do you think it means something?

[shadow bear]

Well probably in the back of his head he wants to know the full story idk . Why didn’t he hear you out tho

[rotund mantle]

idk he was very persistent that I cheated on him or he thinks it’s a form of cheating

Which I think is a stretch

because I didn’t hide anything, I didn’t hide a relationship or a confession or something sexual

I never liked the guy like that

He was my friend and just my friend

And I have him blocked nkw

now

which shows I really don’t care

I feel somewhat guilty that I blocked him without saying anything but I really want my relationship to work and id rather my boyfriend be happy with me

[shadow bear]

Yeah I mean he didn’t know in the beginning you had a guy friend

[rotund mantle]

Wdym

[shadow bear]

If he knew you were texting him and all that why would he get mad

[rotund mantle]

That’s the thing I never hid it or tried to hide it we just never had the chance to talk about who were talking to or be comfortable enough to call and show eachother our msgs etc

so idk

[shadow bear]

Idk if y’all were close it would gotten to that point very fast

[rotund mantle]

Idk tbh I just think the whole amerra thing and me saying since he hid it and lied he micro cheated on me

So he thinks that what I did was worse apparently

So he labels it

As cheating

[shadow bear]

Idk just wait it out he’ll try to understand

He won’t put it in the trash that easily

[rotund mantle]

that’s kinda what I’m hoping

[rotund mantle]

I really hope so man I love him so much

he was the first person I was ever

Physical with after some trauma I had

I genuinely felt safe with him

I couldn’t even hug people before him

[shadow bear]

Update this thread after a couple days if you don’t mind

[rotund mantle]

Mhm I will