#Isolation

11 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

old mauve
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If anyone has any advice or has a solution, or anything, please

Ok, this is long so if its too much for you, you can just go to the tldr, but for those who wanna read through it all:

I am homeschooled. I have always been homeschooled. My mom used to find groups with other homeschooled kids so that I wasn't always alone but through moving and life changes I have nothing

My brother did some shitty things to me so I don't usually do too much with him but that's not what this is about

But I'm not allowed to go out on my own
Not able to skateboard or bike anywhere outside of my neighborhood

And no kids live on my street

None

So I don't do anything
I don't go much of anywhere
And when I go somewhere its either to do a lot of work or just eating somewhere

No meeting friends though

My mom is really protective of me, she's extremely supportive of me and how I feel and my choices, but shes protective

I'm not even supposed to use discord outside of people I know personally

Which means practically no one

There have been loads of moments where I've come so close to getting out of isolation

But it always falls flat

My brother interfered once, then another time I learned I'd have to wait until next year

There have been a few other times but yeah

It just falls back down

And at the end of the day I end up the same husk

The same nothing
I feel like I'm nothing lately
I don't want to die
But I haven't even lived yet

I brought it up to my mom, She says give her some time

And then a year later its still the same, this has happened five times now, In a row

I hold on to hope honestly
I like to think that it'll come around

But it hasn't

Any hobbies I have I never have the time for or it costs too much money
So I can't even focus myself on that

Continued in pt2

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Sometimes I feel crazy
Like I shouldn't be hopeful

I have online friends but its just not the same
And then I gotta stress over hiding them

It sounds like something out of a movie to just make irl friends, not that it's hard for me, but I hardly get the chance

I feel so in-between
Like I don't get to live my life yet

Tl;dr: Isolated and can't go out much

celest python
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If I was in your shoes I would try talking to my mother about it about her being so protective like I would say I know you want me to not get hurt or even kidnapped by meeting new people but being locked up inside won't make me able to communicate in the future or even find a girlfriend and raise kids now I know that pretty hard for you to do but it's something that you have to try doing. I'm sorry that I couldn't help more I just can't really think a way to actually help more if that continues and your mother just keeps does that I think you can communicate with a local hotline to like help you out with that I honestly don't know if that's to much I haven't rlly tried calling one or see the positive stuff that can happen and the negative but yeah I think you should take action to put an end to your mothers actions. (Sorry if you didn't understand my English ain't so good)

old mauve
celest python
old mauve
celest python
# old mauve She does care, but believes that what shes doing is genuinely good for me, and I...

Well honestly if she still doesn't listen to you try raising your tone now your parents may be overprotective cuz there parents never actually care about them that's something we all say "my parents were shitty so I'ma try being the good parent in the future" and that probably caused your parents to be way to overprotective they don't know that what they're doing is actually way worse but honestly try doing it again

old mauve
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When I took it further and broke down in front of her about it she said that I was just ruminating and since then any time I've brought it up she just says I'm probably ruminating again

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The thing about it is even in the best moments i still feel it

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I'm not just ruminating

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Its constant