lunar oasis
I was writing a whole story and i felt so much shame and sadness by writing it that i couldn't so i'm going to break it down.
- I got ||Cucked|| in a long distance situationship by a friend that i'm still friends with.
- I feel a lot of anger from being the only one who ended up losing in the situation, anger because i was practically manipulated and love bombed while the guy i fell in love with, his ex, and my "friend" ended up winning what they wanted.
- Since the "breakup" my social life ended up being a mess because all my friends are long distance, and most of my IRL friends started to move out for their jobs, i feel that talking about my feelings it's a minefield where the mines are me getting humilliated.
- I started to have anxiety and fear about falling in love again because this situationship made me do the most humilliating crap for some breadcrumbs of love, and i don't want to feel that humilliation all over again, i feel that i'm not worthy of love, and now i'm feeling that i'm not worthy enough for my friends love.
Without context it's a little hard to get but... I just can't stop and try to feel blankness in my mind while "relating" the story, i just start to feel so much shame for everything i did just for some love that i can't publish it, i'll probably delete this if i feel that i'm humilliating my self.
I'm sorry for my broken english.
radiant palm
why do u feel ashamed vro? i think it's fine being vulnerable and if people take advantage of that vulnerability it's not ur fault and they're the ones that should be ashamed 
it's fine to be mad sometimes whatever the context, it's fine to be mad without reason