I'm losing some patience

[coral plover]

I have this "copy-paste" habit, where I see how people react to things and copy them to fit in. After years, I accept the fact that people love those who radiate positivity through smiles, so I'm trying my best to be a walking sunshine and energy ball.

But these days, it's really hard to fake up a smile when people around me are being literal pain in the ass.

[onyx river]

Was in the same boat, I wanted to be a social butterfly, and be the reason for peoples day being good, I realized how much of a stragety it was just to be validated and feel wanted.

Truth is, and its generic but it really is true of a quote: Be yourself, because its exhausting being someone you're not

[coral plover]

Well apparently not everyone like my version of "myself", and I could ready use some favors

[onyx river]

Well if "yourself" includes stuff like interrupting people people mid-talk all the time, being inconsiderate, rude remarks and etc it would make sense

But if its about interest, humor, then it really cant be helped

what specifically do people not like

[coral plover]

People often said I don't act my age, I'm 21 btw. Once, there's this boy that called me a pick me just from my way of expressing joy (I made a good tea that day) and it kept bothering me. They said I tend to be "too much", "too dramatic", "too sensitive", or "too childish"

But they also said that they like how I'm being so considerate and kind and all that. But I can't find myself being comfortable as myself anymore

That's why I'm mimicking others. Maybe by then, I could fit in more

[torpid plume]

I am also being referred as too sensitive or too childish for my age.... It used to bother me alot but I stopped caring about it.....
And people need to say it like that are bad things...... IAnd please don't change yourself for others.... One can improve but can't change the whole personality or character.....
I read/heard it somewhere... When we achieve something we should see our footsteps leading to that path not the character or the you left behind .....

[crude elk]

I think that's a beautiful thing to have

People tend to lose that quality over time

They'd rather just exist

what are we without our feelings and expressions tho

[coral plover]

Idk, those expressions and opinions do bother me a lot

[coral plover]

I also agree. I think life would be beautiful if we were just being honest and truthful to ourselves while also not neglecting the rules

[crude elk]

Exactly

[torpid plume]

Yeah.... I have been bullied a lot for it... Can understand....
(One experience - I can't stand sudden loud noises my whole body flinshes a lot during them..... It happened infront of college mates and I get reminded about it a lot lol)

[coral plover]

My, that must have been hard...I'm sorry

[torpid plume]

no worries that happens