#ELLIES LITTLE JOURNAL !!!!!!!!!!!!
1 messages · Page 46 of 1
I missed ypu
i missed mellay
I miss everything
NOTHING IS GOING MY WAY
Texted him earlier
Just as I was starting to cry he literally went offline 
so thats the last time I vent to him
im always here kiddooo
hes a meanie fr
im not sure whats the story behind you and him ellay but it seems complicated
Im gonna start crying again
I CANT DO THIS
omg
literally 🙁
I just hate this so much
I dont wanna be here anymore
I hate being home
I want to be at school
With melanie
I hate this
I genuinely hate this
My dad is making me cry
My mom is making me cry
Ulises is pissing me off so much
I still think about all my old friends
Im so anxious
I HATE seeing couples
It reminds me of how lonely I am
And how im too scared to grow up and date
I feel like most people just dont listen to me
Mel and ling do
But
well jessy too
But only those three
I wish Kimberly would text me
I wish Anderson saw me differently
I wish Melanie was holding my hand
I wish so many things
This all sucks
I dont know what id do if my parents split
Yeah well I texted him and when he went offline I said I gtg
lost aura
Did I say that??
I dont remember
ima tweak
Im tired of all of this
I just want to cry
I just want my mom and dad to be nice to each other
I wish I never met any of these guys
ulises
kevin
harry
yanni
this sucks
But yeah
life sucks
ok
but I gotta be positive
so time to be positive
🙁

That’s how I feel as well Ellie, but dating isn’t an answer to curing loneliness. Having a partner can sometimes make you feel even lonelier if you choose the wrong person.
Friends are a way to make you feel less lonely, you got mel, me and other people. If you’re not ready to date, there are always other types of relationships for you to focus on. Get closer to your buddies, your friends, sibling.
Don’t force yourself to date if you’re scared to date! It comes naturally over time and love often hits you when you least expect it. It’s good to start living a positive mindset and start loving yourself and doing the things you love and give yourself meaning and purpose.
No aura lost lil Ellie, your aura is still 1000000000+ heh
okay
LING
your right

you guys are all i need
you
mel
jessy
my friends

You dont understand how much this means to me
right!
there u go
its still good to make new connections and treasure those u already have
btw
wait i forgot
no homo gang, lyt

I sent all those voice messages under like
40 minutes or something
Under 20
HELP
did u put yourself on 2x speed
HEPP YES
my boogies were loud
gethsemane but sleep token
WHATTT
was ittt
yes ma'am
YAYYY
Heh 67 mango
I WILL be listening to it
heh NOO
I was just getting boogies because I was crying
Ellay and mellay
i cant understand whats happeningg
\
mellayyy elllayyy
I WAS JUST CRYING TO MELANIE AND THEN I BEGAN TO GET SILLY IN MY OTHER AUDIO MESSAGES
I moved on pretty quickly
hewlp
wat happen
Nothing heh
HELP
I still love her even though its been years and shes broken
mel i miss you
I wanna give you the fattest kiss ever

One like in the video
this is cute
i had a toy like that before too but a dog
Goodnight ellieee!!
Goodnight

Heh
I dont feel good at all
I hate everything right now
But I hope this shower makes me happy
After this
I might to my friends
because I love when they give me attention
Just finished
This still just sucks
My skin isn't clear
Bunpy
BUMPY
disgusting
I hate this
I want to rant
But im not sure of what
We were alright just a while ago
my parents are arguing again
Today I had a very nice dream
Heh
but it was weird
i was in some sort of competition
Or something like that
And we were out in a huge huge park
It was empty
No hills
No trees
Just a flat area with all grass
And it seemed like a large campsite because other contestants were there hanging out with each other
And I was in this long tent
Like a rectangular shaped tent
And the front was entirely opened
And I was with two other people
I was with this guy
And this other person
I think it was a girk
girl*
And there was this huge screen above us
well
In front of the entire park
It was massive
And it would show each contestant
And then it showed me
And on the screen it captured all 3 of us
And this guy wrapped his arm around my shoulder
So I wrapped my arm around the girl so that all three of us were together holding each other
And I swear it felt like I was genuinely being held 
And like if i was also holding someone
For the rest of the competition thingy
We had these stations of white tents where we would have to go from stations to stations
And I remember Melanie was there i think
Or it was the guy
And they were writing in this book
About all their struggles and who they hate
Amd i warned them to not because then the lady who was basically hosting this whole competition, would make them read it out loud and everyone would turn against them
And then idk what happened but I was sitting up top on this really really high area
Watching them compete under me
And I was just staring at the people I was with earlier
And then I think I won the competition or smth 
And they let me off with a duck
like
it looked exactly like the little cute duck I bought my sister for her birthday
And they told me
I can control it
WELL
it has a on and off button
And when I turn it on, it comes to life
But when I turn it off
Its just still
Like the unicorn I showed earlier
Like this
And I had the duck on
And I was just kissing it and hugging it
And it was so cute
And when I got home
I tried turning it on
And it wouldn't work
The duck refused to come back to life

And then I woke up
It was nice though
To be held
And to hold someone
and to give affection to the duck
But now im awake
And I dont want to be
ok
it feels like everyone is leaving me
Im so tired of trying to see the good side in everything
Im so tired of being afraid to use names
I feel so lost
I dont feel pretty anymore
I dont want to eat anymore
I just want to keep sleeping
I want to cut my hair off
I hate wearing clothes because of how disgusting my skin is
I hate having wet hair
I hate being itchy
I hate eczema
I hate all the pain I cause myself
I hate that I cannot be honest
I hate bothering everyone to play with me
I hate being annoying
im just so lost i want someone's attention
I dont think you guys understand how happy vanilla makes me 
mama
OK
guys
Its time to lock in
I had my second to cry
Um
"I wish I wish I wish..!"
But
Im just rotting in bed and being a lazy poo and not doing anything to make those wishes come TRUE

Yk what will make me feel better
Washing my face, brushing my teeth, and brushing my hair
Maybe even changing my clothes
So let's do that
h
BRO
7 hours on sent/seen maybe
Alright buddy
BRO IM SO BUNS IN FORESAKEN
Well
BECAUSE IM PLAYING AS GUEST NOW
AND I WAS SO GOATED AS TAPH
elliot
um
I had shitty aim
BUT AS GUEST IM SO GOATED
welk
no im not
HELP
its just that
When im about to block
I block
And they wait for my block to go away
HEPP
HELP
THEN THEY JUMP ME
STOPP
AND IN ORDER TO GET PUNCH
I GOTTA GET THEM TO HIT MY WHEN IM BLOCKING
AUGH
IM SO BUNS
IM GONNA CRY
Ok
Ima play as shed
okay
my sister pissing me off

WE WERE PLAYING
AND THEN
I WAS BLOCKING SO THAT SHE COULD HIT MET
ME*
and she hits me the second block goes away
buddy
she was too busy with these other ppl smh
And then got mad at me when I did punch??
Like what
You gotta block
Then get hit while blocking
TO get punch
Everyone's pissing me off
Finally woke up
Im not texting him
You do not wake up at 2
Buddy
Unless your going to bed extremely late
Then idek
but bro
I hate this
I just want ling to wake up
In fact
I just wanna delete discord
I keep dying in all the games I play
I hate THIS

Only game I dont die in
Priv server btwc
Guys
I FEEL MUCH BETTER
FELL asleep
And woke up
And decided
I miss mel
SO I recorded all my gameplay
To show her
SO now I gotta cut it up
Just finished showering
Watching vanilla right now...

ALSK
I woke up at 4
Well
I was awake since 12
Heh
But yeah
I was crying and everything heh
AND
For 10 minutes I was debating whether I should sneak my phone and run to mel
And ling
And
Around 4
I finally did it
HELP?
But yeah
HELP
I ran to ling and mel
And
Mel stayed with me
Then limg came
And we were all talking heh
And it was very fun
I went from crying to happy
And around 5 I finally fell asleep
okay guys im done cleaning
JOIMED RIGHT ON TUME
hes lowkey cool

ghost
hes kinda goated
Like he just started playing
By hes not missing those hits
but**
AND HE WAS HATING ON THE GAME EARLIER
but now that we played he likes it
Heh
Im freakin
EATING
Rn
So good
heh
oh
um
I sold
so badly
ok
if only I was there
20 minutes ago
ok
Vro get out is that my beautiful Haruhi..?


Heh
I love you guys
Admire
HELP
🥺 **
I wanna give each of you guys a little welcome kiss
when I get to school

augh
What the sigma
Strike me down atp because why are there 12 blankets on my bed
trash that came from my sisters bed
Her food crumbs
and her clothes
Shes the reason im always itchy
Ima jump
While my sister was on her call I was on my grind
Heh
Full set of iron now
And i will be expanding my room

but for now!!!
I MUST
put my phone to charge
heh
ily mellay
❤️
Need more storage for my videos
!!!
ADORABLE WHAT
@wooden sable where i got brutally jumped
"Get em boys" ah shit 💔
What even was that
WAIT
I gotta show you my friend getting slimed
a tour i was giving and then fell off a cliff ...
@granite gull
Heh
Why was i lowkey quick with it..!

Guy's
DON'T play with this lady
She lowk said
Uh
Wait I'm looking for something
um let's tell this guy to shut his mouth
praying you get banned
I'm sleeping in
sorry must've been the wind...
I've already been muted for a day over dumb shit
DON'T wish bad on me
yeah and then you run to me whining 😒

My goat saved me... 🥺
I feel like im going crazy
im going through my screen recordings
And like
a good 70% of them are just me
playing alone
and speaking to myself
and pretending mel or someone is there watching

making jokes
and referencing things
like
wow
im here recording
alone
playing alone
and talking to myself

And my mom watched me do it a couple times
um
guys
im losing aura

Im going to play by myself again and record
because even though im alone
its kinda fun heh
I didnt think just a singular word could make me so happy and emotional 
I didnt
im borrowing them
Like how he did with my armor
And wood
And berries
and other resources
must've been the wind
Heh
I made into charcoal we could both use
I made a farm for us
I USED IT TO NOT DIE GETTING THE DIAMOND'S
ok
um
guys
since im a great person
im going to give it back
🥺
Giving 32 diamonds to the homeless! emotional 🩵
giving back to the ones in need 🩵
Homeless man brutally stabs YouTuber to death (Gone wrong!)
Heh
OK
everyone wants me dead
I was trying to moisturize my face
With this awesome lotion
um
why is it so high up
WHAT
oh hell yeahhh
Sprite
guys his house is so tuff
My house is indeed tuff
That is my finishing dock though not my house
Bc my house isn't finished
It's gonna be
A 4 layer tower
BRO THAT WASN'T EVEN ME
no it was oms
I witerwee don even careyh :/....
First will be storage
Second will be enchantment or
Smelting
And the third will be the one I don't pick
And the final one will be my personal room
Wait
I'm making it five layers
One layer will be a farm
wait this is so tuff
Yes?
Remember how you said your dogs died
Guys. After a little bit of rereading I would like to say, I DID NOT ALMOST C** WHILE MAKING TICS HOLE WEAK
Yes
remember how your dogs randomly spawned to you
Yes
cuz I said a cuss word 😕
They muted me for a day
hah
Because they thought I did something wrong
When I didn't
I'll call a mod and say you're bullying me
Knowing them they'll ban you for 7 months
says the guy that made that weird comment
Heh
Exactly vro
gottem
gottem good!
anwyays
NO
yes u did
That was a misplaced comment
It had zero correlation to what you said
correlation..!.
I didn't even realize WHAT YOU SAID UNTIL YOU SENT THE VIDEO
😭 🥀
interesting
OK
ok
ok...
They were hiding from you
because you hurt them
they told me
😕 💔
No
HELP
YOU TOOK THE LEADS
well when I went to go get them they were sad and whimpering
You fatass
NO NO NO
NO HE DIDNT
BESIDES THE POINT ANYWAYS
What did you expect kids with an absent father to act like 💔
they were low and hurt you monster...
Yuh huh
im taking them back for that
I don't even love my dogs enough to hit them let alone feed them
Maya the bee told me your a big piece of poo
bigger than Katie's poo
GOTTEM
HELPP
They were low from fighting in the night
Because you left them out there
IDEK KNOW WHERE THEY ARE
do you dont love them or feed them
Kk
they flew away because they hate you
Not yet
what a owner
ive been feeding them and changing their collars
And taking them on walks
See
you could've at least made them a little house
You can do that
I'm making the place WE're gonna live
I'll make to make the Jujutower 6 floors now
Y'know
If you help
I'll get armor
For the dogs
so what im hearing is that I can take care of your babies and I gotta freakin give you a bunch of supplies but you cant freakin even give me food for the freakin dogs
so my freaking house is made was for NOTHING
Wdym
wow
I literally
and pay freakin rent
Bummed off you
u literally such a Katie poo 😕
I DO
I GAVE YOU HALF MY DIAMONDS
YOU TOLD ME I GOTTA PAY RENT
um that was a gift buddy
Not that much
thats not called paying rent
Like bees
OK SO WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO GIVE U
LISTEN
bees?
LISTEN
no
You don't gotta pay rent
You can stay in jujutower for free
Just don't let the animals die
including my dogs cats and bees
That's all I want
I'll build a place outside for them
ok buddy
They'll get a place inside but idk how tf they're gonna fit
WHAT
You have
THIS many pets
OK
ok so
fine
storagw
1 for enchanting
1 gym
I'ma kms
Funy
Gym?
Sure
You build it
Ok
This is a lot of talk and not
Me in the server
Building
Yeah while you relax and eat all our food supplies
anyways
No
While I'm building everything else 💔
I will
😒
My mom was mocking my laugh
Ight
Squirrel girl
I said that to helping my dad
not opening the servers
OK IM NOT PLAYING WITH YOU ANYMORE BECAUSE OF THAT
NO
NO
NO
I spent
240+ minutes
In that server
That's like
6 hours
I just walked my dog Katie'
guys im back
and my papa hurt his knee while setting my dresser down on the ground

Im stealing little baby katie
☺️
shes so cute I need her
Imagine how ling I spent in it
ling
heh
Ling mentioned?,,
Wth
NOOO
Farhertic
ur supposed to laugh 🙁
arrest him
Interesting
It's 3.
In ginna eat rn
WTF
Shucks
NL
well
No that was breajfast
im so sneakt
sneaky
I gotta put my phone away though bc im at the table
Heh
HWAT
my huzz
Sneaky Tic
everyone basically knows where im from vro
YOU didn't even tell me you were done eating
I talk about it all the time
Whoops
I've been pissing 7 year olds off on Roblox this entire time
I need to make Jujutower
Oh
Are you staying in it?
I forgot
And don't wanna scroll
ive been playing with huzz
Ooooh
Rizzlante Tic
Tim Cheese?
I gyatta call her neow
gang im gonna play until like 5:30 and thne maybe if your still alive and if my phone still got battery
then ill play with ypu
trust
I use to be obsessed with that game
I am still alive
But she waited longer
So I can wait
o hwhar
Sorry I was excited
Oh
Cod
Fish
im playing
zombies
with huzz
gang im done playing
Heh
Rage quitting is awesome
I AM
I am alive
Let's mine then craft
Minecraft.
heh
I KOVEE
chiikawa
so muchh
and my elf baby
my sweet little precious baby
shes coming home to me
Im so happy I can cry
Shes going with my calicos
They are all chanting
"come home come home!"
Take a picture it’ll last longer
OH?
guess who solved vros bee problem
meee !!
Gangs house lowkey tuff..
Holy tuff
When we hit day 100
So tuff
I miss my sisters
I need them to get on the game and play with me toooo

Grassisas
JUJUTOWER PRETTY SHOT
Mouse
hey juju
i missed u too elllieee!!
how you doing my guy
YAYYY

I PLAYED FHE CHUCKY CHEESE NIGHT SHIFT GAME YESTERDAY
THE SAME ONE I PLAYED WITH YOU AND MELLAY
She died first...
🥀
Guys
My elf baby is coming
Freakin
TODAY
IM SO HAPPY
Decent as always
How's the morning treating you?
DID U WIN
It’s evening here haha 9pm already, but doing well so far!
NOO WE GOT JUMPED AND DIEDD 😭
EXACTLYYY LMAO
Nice
Great to see
Five nights at Chester cheeses
Dude
I lowk almost shat my pants playing that game with my friends
One of us were outside distracting the animatronics bc we ran out of power
Then we got the final night
And lost the second the final guy came out
He was like really fast or something
Apparently there's a second game so I plan on playing it with my friends when I get home

