#A journal off my life season 2
1 messages Β· Page 12 of 1
real
it so fits the vibe ngl
hm
the way the girl waterboarded herself for this
ts like
okey listen to ''six feet under'' and ''come out and play'' next
end
i am bro
REAL
chill
I RAN THE 4,2 K WITH CHIHIRO I GOT A PERSONAL RECORD HAHA
I KNOW RIGHT
you should go
its so good
no not yet
where u work
just a random store, il be working with food tho
fud π€
real, cant eat it myself thoπ
y
no one have to know
just
take
it
and
eat

say youre abt to faint
or smth
what if its 1kg of ground beef
i work with bread and cakes
mmmm
EUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I LOVE CAKE
REAL
what cake u love the most
chocolate
what type
the moist ones
real shit
you mean the ones with cream?
or sauce
or whatever its called
ew no
so wym???
she just love chocolate cake
so im not gonna make a cakes tooππππ
BHAHAHAHA
ugh im horrible at cooking
you kind of are
did you see the reel i had send you
I reacted
i send you more
reels
lmaooo
fair enough
π
we all start somewhere π
well she better never starts
vat
that she will set the kitchen o fire.
do u want that to happen
no
oh
HELP
watch my house buuurnπ₯π₯
LET THE WORLD BURNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
π€
with the fire that you started in meeee
go to sleep
no say it
not here
were you gonna call me a good girl
lame
..

if you flirt with me atleast do it in public so that i can show it off
cuz ive known you for long enough now!
Okay love
Good girl, right now go to sleep
i might
so kiss me

like everywhere
i sudenly have a headace
and my stumach hurts
my hands too
and dont forget my painfull arms

and tomorrow il also burn my fingers so yk
and my eyes
I will kiss you everywhere my love
since theyre burningrn
stop saying that instead just come over
i still need that hoodie
okey im going to sleepnow
i love youuuu
If I send it to you, I'll spray my perfume on this hoodie
YEEEY
Beatifulll
okey bye now before you kill me
I love you tooβ€οΈ
sabrina perfumes π
I hate how my parents make fun of me because I'm tired after work
wanna talk abt it?
idk what to talk about ngl
What's your favorite season and why?
i guess spring perfect weather most of the time
summer
~~and war π€ ~~
NEXT TOPICCCC!!!
What's the best movie you've ever seen, and why?
@unkempt shale u can answer this one
harry potter and the deathly hallows pt2
isnt harry potter a series
yeah?
but different movies
like 8 of em
spookie
If you could live without having to sleep, would you and what would you do with the extra time?
id die
i would write vile war lore
onawards
What's your biggest regret and why?
idk, not buying those necklaces when they were 25 dollars instead of 300
same for vinyls that are in the 2k now
rip
yes
What's something you've done that pushed you out of your comfort zone?
getting a job
what the fuck did ava do
shes the bich that cheated on me
oh
yuh
What's something you've always wanted to learn more about?
WW2
ww2, you say?
yeah
@pliant dragon GET OVER HERE
no shes going to sleep
srry
i was gonna start talkin abt it but nah
oh
nw gn
gn
π
If you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why?
nothing tbh
nothin
If you had to choose only one place to go on vacation for the rest of your life, where would it be and why?
USA, its a big country
the nords
idk either
alr
If you could witness any event in history, what would it be?
the formation of israel
marie antonet ''they should just eat the cake''
i wanna fact check
What's the biggest risk you've ever taken?
i dunno
being depressed nearly a year
nearly made me redo this grade

What's something you've never done but would like to try?
paracute jumping
going to amerika
What's the best surprise you've ever received?
Today ny friend send me a picture
Where she like painted her body, but she send me a naked pic
And like she posed in a way that I couldn't see yk
But I could see more than I wanted
Like you couldve warned or asked me yk that would've been fine ig
But like ong
im pretty sure that was traumatic-
Nah it wasnt
She had a fine body
But like
Bro
THE WAY SHES LEGALLY A ADULT TOO?!
SHES ADULT??
She's 18
I've known her since she was 16
I think she just turned 16 when I met her
Aaaaa
i mean it aint that bad
just freaked me out when i thought about it
if my friend sent me a naked picture i'd beat him tf up
so wym "it aint that bad"
thats lowkey crazy
the fuck
cuz i mean, its a picture where i didnt see anything bad on
just some legs and a stumach (that went a little far up)
but the INTENTION
wdym intention?
and ur dignity bro
she painted on her body, and she wanted to show me?
youre acting like shes grooming me
idk man ts is weird
its not THAT wierd....
ive recieved bikini photos of friends.........
same thing tbh, cant see anything on either
its notπ
you just dont get girlhood
but like you ask before you send
idc about any pics
JUST ASK BEFORE YOU SEND A NAKED PIC BRO
ofc i dont
maybe cuz IM NOT A WOMAN
π€―
youd think some men would get it tho
this isnt even the strangest thing of girlhood
those are the best men
sure bud
touched a shore spot there i see

hey love
HELP I SO THOUGHT IT SAID ''firefighters''
FR
i was like ''real shit''
SAME
so when you stopping the energy addiction
whats pregos
pregnant
JAMES
NOOOOO
yes
oh whys that
I will protect(im playing fortnite)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
yes!
tf
why
alr
as in?
it couldve been worse
what happen
just a wierd as baptism
whut
i was at a baptism and idk it was wierd kinda
why was it weird
''when youre sick you need to go to God, he will heal you''
''my husband (he was dead) is in a party, up there. while we on earth are in a chaos''
what chaos who chaos
......
bro
war everywhere basically
wdym what chaos?
i can name wars in only 3 places
ukraine
israel/part of mid east
and some of africa
neither do u bro

u live in a peacehaven
who are you to even talk?
the fuck?
im not even going to start this argument
stay the victim
who said im a victim bro
you act like it
no i dont
okey
anyways stay in the buble that the rest is peacefull
i will π
What's the most interesting fact you know?
yeah no
yk that were preparing for war right?
puting has been threating our country for 2 years now
so is america
why would the netherlands plan for war
we have food and drink stored away
cuz we arent as fucking save as your brain thinks?
so many countrys are making bunkers right now
many countrys are encouriging people to store food
to have a safety plan
were preparing for ww3
my country's been in war for like a year and 7 months and we aight π
idk what your country is telling you, but stop being naive and thinking that the rest of the world is say
save
i js think ur overexaggerating
yeah right, cuz i dont live in fear of war?
okey
keep being naive!
rephrase
no
ur entitled to an opinion but naive is definately not the word for it
it is
if ur so sure
but hey, keep thinking that im overreacting
like i dont see news
nor do i hear other perspectives of other countrys
i just hope you know that we are actually preparing for ww3
germany is making a army 3 times the size
it will be the biggest army of europe
did u know that a lot of proccessed food is due to capitalism
am i talking about that?
no
if u want me to leave, i can
im talking about how youre saying that im overreacting. while the whole world is scared
did i say that?
go ahead
if you feel unsafe by facts then leave
i dont have time for this kind of shit, when i know its the truth
no u just dont seem to enjoy my presence
maybe i dont
idk why but my friend just said ''i just prayed for you'' idk why it made me uncomfortable probably because we arent that great of friends anymore, shes so sweet sudenly it just feels wierd
idk why, i just havent had any like motivation for stuff lately, while at the same time i do?
its so wierd
i brush my teeth more often which is a huge win
but showering keeps just being hard
i dont know why, but in my head its just such a big thing that its just so hard to get myself to do it. even after sports
just updated my bioo
i think its a upgrade
it looks better this way
im about to order some diesel jeans
and some tops
ive been exausting myself lately
staying up till atleast 1 am, just to make sure i dont take too long too fall asleep
I felt so sick today it sucks
I was nauseous, headace and the worst cramps
I took some stronger painkillers that worked
I hate how I'm practically alone rn, I called my mom she's now at home but in a different building it's next to our house
And my gf is going out pretty much whole day
It's the days like these that made me hate long distance
Cuz like I don't want to call, I just want to cuddle and say absolutely nothing
i wanna tell her more, but its like nevera good moment ig. im scared to trigger her. make stuff worse yk
it sucks
take ur time, the worst thing to do is rushing through it
i believe you'll be able to overcome it eventually π
true, i feel guilty tho
there's nothing bad about taking time for yourself
this entire thing is about your feelings, your experiences, so you cant hurt those same feelings in the proccess
wdym?
picture this, you feel guilty for not telling her more about your situation, correct?
yeah
but you also dont feel like it's the right time, correct?
i guess it is, but i just dont know how and when
right, but if you do push it, you'll end up more sad, more discouraged, more dissapointed
while yes, you furfill your wish of telling her more, you also hurt yourself
idk honestly, i guess it makes me more sad atm knowing that i dont share it all with her
listen, i know what she thinks
she doesn't want to rush you through this and neither does she want you to rush through it
when talking about emotions, you have to follow your gut, your own feelings
because only by that will you feel furfilled and...
finnished
with that il end up in self isolation.
i see.
how about, you speak to her one by one
tell her only the thing you're comfortable with
and warm up to it
what do ya say?
i try to ig
but its like how do you start that
''oh yeah btw i really wanna die rn''
like yk
sure
π
i think she'd think otherwise
just saying
seeing you two together supports my claim
she cares about you
and so no, it wont be "weird" for her
maybe shock a bit? but in the end she'll want to help
doesnt mean its not wierd to drop shit like that
i dont want pity tho
i dont want her to treat me different or shit
not even about the pity
saying what you feel can make it better
it hasnt worked before tbh
heck, i tell my friends about my ||suicidal|| tendencies all the time, doesnt make it much better but i think better of myself
9/10 times people just end up shitty advice
thats nice
well do i send shitty advice?
π
doesnt really work for me tho, just makes me feel guilty i told them anything
honestly? sometimes, but once im a shit mood anything will just piss me off
well thats alright
same for me
I just talked to a friend of Nadia shes younger than me, shes such a sweatheart ngl. shes grown onto me kinda like my little sister idk.
we just kinda talked about shit i saw myself in her
thats nice
I hate the way that I am. I tend to get mad for no reason when I'm not feeling well. I shut people out or just lash out to them
Tonight I'm home alone I really wanted to just call the whole night. Instead I just broke down cried a lot and didn't really call with her
Fuck this all honestly
Fuck
||I wish that she would just block me honestly, it would be better for her. Not having to deal with me||
||I relapsed today||
I feel guilty but idk it felt nice
no... sophie, no
Why not? It's the truth
i mean from personal experience and from talking with you
you're not a bad person
but i'd be happy to hear out why you think otherwise if you'd like
But I'm hurting her
Because I don't comunicate right, I lash out when she tries to help and just overall shit
hmm
have you asked her what she thinks about that?
She will just denied it
i see...
but what if she actually doesn't dislike that?
We both know it's toxicπ
yeah but look at the reason WHY you do that
Idk
wanna take a moment to think abt it?
I've tried before
Il be talking with my psychologist about it today (I don't want to go I wanna cancel itπ)
π
ya i also dont enjoy psychologists
but whatever gng
just go there and have some jokes with her idk
you dont have to vent out your feelings
It took me nearly an hour for her to understand that I enjoy putting loads of presure on my body
AND SHE STILL DIDNT UNDERSTAND IT
Well that's why I'm goingπ
i never vented out my feelings
I've been falling back (seems like a depressive episode) and that's why I'm going
makes me feel weak
I enjoy sitting on my hands with full body weight
OH
Real
i have this pressure point in the middle of the bridge of my nose
when you press down on it
AAHHHHHHHHHHHH
so good
I am back
hi
Hello
how was the shower
thats lit
I'm exausted
No, I gotta get ready and then bike to my psychologist
oh
thats not lit
take a bus or smt
I wish
do yall not have a bus/metro/public transportation card there?
Bro I live in the middle of nowhere
We don't have busses, train or metros
π π
For the first stop I have to bike 30 minπ
Ugh
technically i have 2
Shush
hehehehe
whats that
It's stuff to set your makeup with
oh thats crazy
i know nothing about that
Damn
My mascara is also in need of a refresh
I need to beg my dad to go to germany
where does mascara go again
Lashes
My eyeshadow is nearly done but il use bronzer for that cuz like it's the same shade
Real
bronzer?
are you putting bronze as eyeshadow
It's bronzing powder so yeah I will
π
uraniuming powder
Uranium girls
Probably
@quartz condor yes or no to eyeliner
idk brooooooo
Idk what that is
JUST SAY YES OR NO BRO
1 zloty
IDK WHAT YOU DO WITH ITTTTTTT
π§ββοΈ
You out it on like your uhm waterline
WHATS THAT
Eyeliner
Eith the eyelook I kinda have
Cuz I'm talking with you
that looks like someone abused that person
but thats my take
Bro
Imma just do it
please save me god
BHAHAHAHAHA
I could've asked you so much more questions
no
Imma do brown
no no no no
dont drag me into your witchcraft
This ain't witchcraft bitch
uh yes it is
No it isnt
erm
idk
let me think
my instincts
are telling me black
or brown?
bro idfk
I'm already doing brown
ok thats lit
With or without wing
what now?
i dont know what that is gngggg
Pointy part or no pointy part
which do u prefer
Bro idk
π
HELP
You didn't even really do anything
This was 2 steps of the like 10
no shit
BECAUSE IDK WHAT IT MEANS
Next time you'll be deciding more!
NO
IM NOT PARTICIPATING
IN YOUR SICKS GAMES
YOU'RE TORTURING MEEEEEEEEEE
That's the point
what for bro
π
im playin with rubber bands bro
leave me alone
Imagine
its fun
i turned scissors
into sometihng
something
super strong
so yuh
Into?...
like the scissors
close super fast
and powerfully
and strongly
and like
pain
hows the uhm
Should I be concerned?
I also like scissors
I'm done
Doing what
thats lit
playng with rubberbands
and my scissors
and a small mirror stand
Slay
L
Real
Bro is crashing out over a rubber band
I NEED MY THICK RUBBER BANDS
CUZ MY NORMAL RUBBER BANDS
WONT WORK FOR WHAT IM TRYING TO DO
AND IT ALSO HAS MY MEDIUM LONG RUBBER BAND
FOUND IT
YESSSSSSSSSS
FOR I HAVE TRIUMPHED
OVER THE ENEMY!!!
when are you going to the psychologist
In 15 min
Then I need to bike for 35 min

Right....
idk im interested in knowing
not in a weird way
its fine if not btw @unkempt shale
wait shit
oh no
Sorry forgot to awnser. But ofc I willπ
ok thats lit but
i ran out of thick rubber bands
my life is over
Rip
Yeey
Real
ye my fatass is a food demon
REAL
Yesterday I ate 50 mini pancakes best meal ever
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
(I also had some friesπββοΈ)
dream meal
Real
Bet
OEHH
Yes
pencils
It was good
I talked about how I've been feleing
And then about me and Nadia and she gave me some advice
To use one specific words that wil mean for example 'hey im feeling like shit but I don't want to talk about it right now'
Kind of like that
ah
thats lit
u think it gonna help?
We shall see
soph :(
Yes
im single again
was about to break up with her, respectfully due to our situation
and then she started to fuckin
insult me
Me core
I'm sorry to hear that
ye
You want to talk about it?
now im even more hollow
ion rly vent out my feelings
That's alright, my dms are open tho
Ofcoursee
had fun?
Absolutely
Yess
very lovely of u!!
Why you talking so wierd
Yeah I get what you mean
I get that
Recently I've started to bark at men
Only when they come up to me
It works
I'd recommend
NO WAY
BHHAHHAA YES
DIDNT I TELL YOU THIS?
it gets the best reactions ngl
are you barking at your dad?
YOU TOLD ME ABT BARKING
no!
he isnt wierd
but like
i bark at wierd men
NO
YOURE NOT GETTING IT
only wheni m walking in public
and they want to go ''can i have your snap''
EXPLAIN
AAAAAA
the moment they go ''can i'' i do WOEF WOEF WOEF
WOEF
WOEF
and they get so confused and shocked
x: hey can i get your instagram?
you: omg sure my username is BARK BARK BARK
BHAHAHAHAH LOVE THAT
youre barking?
BHAHAHAA
youd wish
I wish
HELP
π
me when men
wow....
stupid!
the rest is shit
SLOW
maybe its
useless
BUT THERES A BETER WORD FOR IT
I KNOW
MANCHILDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
MANCHILDDDDDDD
most men are manchild
its litarly a men child
thats lit gng
its litarly a guy that cant take care of himself
O
the fuck does gng mean
(most men)
gang
WAHT WHO SAID THAT
ohh
see but
thats not always our problem
π
nadiayour funny dont go bald
cap
HAHAHAHAHA
litarly biggest cap ever
OKAAAYYYYY
the fuck
brodie π
tell me when its acceptable that a guy cant take care of himself
this is literally one of the biggest reasons im mad at my mom
i was never taught how to cook, clean, and etc'
i had to learn it myself
MANCHILDDDDDDDDDDDD
''i choose to blame your mom''
FVCK MY LIFEEEEEEEEEEEE
that song was made for you
we're proud of you!
ye but u dont gotta be rude about it twin
Sophie listen to Sabrina Cappuccino
im sorry but i dont need a child to take care of
i aint rude
ive already listend to her
no matter how long i've improved
listen to renee rapp bro
sometimes i put too much seasoning
putit all in a bowl
sometimes too little
boom done
I am a real bad girl but really good kisser
how hard can it be
bet
u never know the portions
how bro
