Abusive dad

[compact flax]

I come from a strict conservative-liberal family . I am 19 persuing bachelors . becoz of my dad is so strict nd also a breadwinner of my small family , no can speak against him . I am still living with them becoz my clg is there . If I go against my dad , he gonna kill me for sure . I don't have much money to leave him nor my mom is a worker. I am single child so I can't ask anyone who gonna listen to my problem or help me . becoz my dad is still handling my expensive tuition fees rn I can't go against him.

[digital cedar]

What is he doing to you that you want to go against?

[compact flax]

beating me , abusive slangs , trying to stop me to go to clg so I don't persue anymore my education

[tranquil briar]

Your father wants you to win in life. Is that wrong?

You remind me of my life. ❤️

[compact flax]

becoz I defend my mom he give me death threats

just like today

[compact flax]

wdym win when he wants u stop going to clg so that u can't fulfill ur dreams

[tranquil briar]

clg?

Look I'm not making excuses for dad. Him being too strict on you is wrong.

You said that he is paying your tuition fees so it clearly means he wants you to educate yourself.

If you don't want to do that then you need a job so you'll have enough money to stay on your own.

[compact flax]

becoz my mom can't

[compact flax]

I want to do job

but he doesn't want me

becoz he is in charge for my tuition fee he can control me however he wants

[tranquil briar]

That's because he doesn't want you to get a job then fail at college.

[compact flax]

bruh I acing my clg

[tranquil briar]

Yeah if he is paying for it then he is in charge of it.

[compact flax]

he doesn't care if I am top at my clg or not

it not about tuition fee tbh

it's about how abusive he is

[tranquil briar]

Tell me about it.

[compact flax]

beating u for defending mom , giving death threats

[tranquil briar]

That's terrible 🙏

[digital cedar]

He's literally paying your tuition though so it's hard to imagine how he doesn't want you to pursue any education.

[compact flax]

becoz he doesn't want to

but if he doesn't my dad's business have to shut down becoz it's in mom's name

he is doing only for his business

my mom is only one who is supportive

[digital cedar]

He's the breadwinner, so obviously no matter what happens your mom can't simply decide to harm the business because it will harm all of you.
You need to understand where this is coming from since it seems there's miscommunication.

[compact flax]

I come from a family like " they should get divorce "

[compact flax]

but if ur dad giving death threats

like today

just waiting for 2-3yrs

nothing else

[tranquil briar]

Idk mate. You need to ask yourself what is important..

1. You sticking with an abusive father so you can complete your education and have a better life in the long term.

2. You leaving home so you can have some peace. Getting a minimum paying job. Struggling for a while. Living on your own then eventually bringing your mom with you.

[compact flax]

if I leave mom wouldn't survive for 1 day

Ik that

so i can't leave my mom to my abusive dad

so I am trying to stick too

[tranquil briar]

Then you have no choice but to stay. I suggest you seek outside help like a family or councillor to speak to your dad.

[compact flax]

yea ig so

[tranquil briar]

I know this seems difficult to do but although your father is strict and abusive, show him love. This will soften his heart.

[compact flax]

i hope

[tranquil briar]

Don't give up. Take care of your mental health as well.

To increase your motivation, decrease sadness and improve energy levels, eat eggs, fish, fruits and vegetables. Get 8 hours sleep and exercise plus walk for 1 hour a day. 🙏

[compact flax]

i do pilates

in my small room

[alpine roost]

Bro what the hell

Absolute dog reply

Stick it out

You understand there’s damn places out there for people facing this stuff

And your supportive reply is suck it up??

From someone coming from a household where the police at the door was a regular thing

Absolute do NOT take any crud

Find financial help from the government if you can

I’m homeless after leaving my dads house and yk what it’s so much better than being pinned to a wall by my neck @tranquil briar

@compact flax try speaking to some women’s charities for women facing abuse

Some can provide free help and also support you to find accommodation

Contacting your local council can also help you, and if you want it to be confidential they’ll keep it confidential

[twin trout]

I’m sorry, did you need anything?

[alpine roost]

Sorry @tranquil briar

[alpine roost]

Not you mb

[twin trout]

all good

[alpine roost]

You sound like a textbook school counsellor

June if your dad ever gets worse or lays a hand on you or your mum, the police is one call away. It sucks to do it as he’s a family member and I understand he pays ur education but your mental well-being and safety is more important. There’s help for you to get an education

[compact flax]

I can't get becoz of my dad's income

[alpine roost]

Doesn’t matter if there’s abuse in the household

But you would have to explain what’s happening

[compact flax]

what about my clg?

[alpine roost]

Could you explain what a clg is

[compact flax]

my degree everything

[compact flax]

university

[alpine roost]

What country are you in

[compact flax]

I am doing bachelors in cybersecurity

India

I just need money

but I am fresher

[alpine roost]

Do you have a loan system?

For university

Loans suck trust me I know but in the long run it’s better than facing what your facing

You could always explain to your university about your home situation and they might be able to provide some way of helping

[compact flax]

I can't take loans

I never took loan

[compact flax]

they have a councellor

for mental health

thinking to seek help

[alpine roost]

Is the councellor aware of your risk of being at home

[compact flax]

its only 2 months

as a frsher

maybe I will talk with them later

[alpine roost]

I would speak to your uni

They could be able to guide you to get financial support

They do have an obligation toward their students

[compact flax]

they only help u financial support if u belong to poor family

I tried to get scholarship

[tranquil briar]

Please do not contact me or I will report your for harassment 🙏

[alpine roost]

To what discord?

[alpine roost]

Speak to your uni first

How come you’re not able to get like a maintenance loan?

[tranquil briar]

I don't care. That's your life. I'm here to help June. Not you.

[alpine roost]

💀

[alpine roost]

Telling someone to stay in a dangerous a situation isn’t helping

[tranquil briar]

I gave them two choices. You failed to read the second option that they rejected.

[alpine roost]

Exactly my point you gave them choices

[tranquil briar]

Not everyone can leave their parents house. It's not that easy.

[alpine roost]

I haven’t even said that 💀

[tranquil briar]

Then what are you saying?

[alpine roost]

Read maybe you’ll learn something

@compact flax am I okay to send you some links to some university sites in India?

[compact flax]

idk about loans that much but I don't wanna take it

[alpine roost]

That’s understandable

[compact flax]

see what she said is same as my mother said to me

[alpine roost]

Being in a domestic abuse situation is extremely dangerous

Your life isn’t just two choices of suck it up and get on with it or leave

As stuck and difficult it may seem there are places you can go to get help

[compact flax]

I am finding jobs online

which I can make money

editing

[alpine roost]

That’s a good start

[compact flax]

but idk where to start

it's not easy

[alpine roost]

No it’s not i know

But the end goal of being out of a situation like that is very blissful

It’s like dragging a ten ton brick though I get it

You’re interested in doing editing as a job?

[compact flax]

yea

[alpine roost]

That’s pretty cool

[compact flax]

ik I will make money

[alpine roost]

You got a portfolio?

[compact flax]

yea I do

[alpine roost]

Why don’t you do some freelance and build up while also looking for some jobs?

It’ll build rep