#Me

90 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

glass flare
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if youre going through a breakup there isnt really anything else to do but continue with your life

uncut needle
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Its not the breakup thats hurting me the most

glass flare
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what is it

uncut needle
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its the fact that everything ends up badly for me

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ive lived my life having nothing but bad ends

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for everything

glass flare
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dont have a victims mindset

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thats such a weak thing to do

uncut needle
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what even is the victim mindset am i having here

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i powered through everything

glass flare
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everything ends up bad

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everything?

uncut needle
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i didnt make it up

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not everything literally

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major things

glass flare
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you have youre limbs? you have your sight? youre a functioning human?

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if you can, think of it from a different perspective

uncut needle
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My sight is bad, my eyes have cataract, and glaucoma and i have high chances of going blind. My limbs are not so great

glass flare
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listen to be

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there is never anything that cant be fixed

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things go terrible for you

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living in the past wont help build a better future

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guess who can bring a future where youre happy

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i cant

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your ex cant

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you can

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because thats all there is to do

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all there is ever to do

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continue moving forward and building a future where youre happy

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you might go low and dont stay low

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rise from your stuggles

uncut needle
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I am aware that things can be fixed, i fixed it, patched it, i did everything i could, i know this will only last for a while until i feel good for a while again, then i feel bad again, I know things can be better, but i just dont have the energy to keep going. Im exhausted.

glass flare
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you wont know if you will feel bad

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if you think you will feel bad in the future, of course you will

uncut needle
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No, but i can see that i dont know how much further i can go until i get the happiness i want, because i just dont have the energy

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im not preventing myself from fighting more

glass flare
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happiness starts when you want to be happy

uncut needle
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im saying that i just dont have the power

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not enough

glass flare
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trust me you do

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you havent realised yet

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smile and youre happy

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you might feel terrible

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but youre forcing yourself to smile

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so youre happy

uncut needle
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So im just supposed to fake it or what

glass flare
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dont think happiness is something that takes alot to work for

glass flare
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the more you have a mindset of happiness

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the pain wont get to you

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you will find a way to move from your past

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might sound easy now

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but its continuous, youre never meant to stop

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do it until youre really happy

uncut needle
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Im tired, luh

glass flare
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but youd want work for a future without pain?

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it will get better, but its your choice if you want it to start now

uncut needle
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Ive know this, luh. Im very self aware. I know what my feelings are and how i feel, and why im feeling certain ways. I know what my problems are. I know if i keep being in pain i wont get better, i know if i keep thinking things wont get better, it wont, but im just very tired. Ive gone through this for so long now. I know for a fact that this pain wont last forever, sooner or later ill feel fine again, because i know for a fact that im strong enough to just power through. But its very exhausting. Im just so so tired.

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I just dont want it to keep being like this anymore.

glass flare
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take time

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rest

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and think of how you will proceed

glass flare
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actually

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you might be your own problem

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but thats not what im tryna say

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you know if you dont help yourself, youll only be sinking in to that pain

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it hurts now, but it will hurt even worse later on

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stop thinking in the past too

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you cant make your choices to continue because something went wrong on in the past right?

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thinking more for right now, youll heal

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probably

uncut needle
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I'll try.

glass flare
uncut needle
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I got tons of them right now apparently.

glass flare
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remember, think for the future

uncut needle
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Trying to but how am i even supposed to think for the future when i can barely breath right now.

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I do have some issues, its true

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im a bit too emotional and sensitive for my own good, and sometimes im thankful for that because it gives me the ability to understand feelings better, others or my own

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But this is what it causes me.

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This is why i shut down my emotions for a while

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Why i never talk about myself, never get attached, never put myself into a position to get hurt

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But that is just not living

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but once i start living i get hurt, and i cant breath

glass flare