idk im indecisive | The Therapy Center | Page 1

runic charm Jul 4, 2024, 1:11 PM

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idk how to start things off but i saw someone post thing as 'parts' i might follow that and post when im ready

runic charm Jul 7, 2024, 8:23 AM

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idk if im gonna follow the part thing but heres a rant

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i can't socialize first things, the ppl i talk to school (which happend kinda rarely) is the only socialization i have, tho i have a frnd grp, my mom finds it stupid and i should leave
can i go out with friends tho? nope. can i talk to them online? nope. i cant even use discord but i just have to use it behind their backs

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i dont remember half of my childhood

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most of it

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idk why (prolly cause of underlying trauma but im not a psychiatrist) i do have some good memories but more than that i have bad ones
i've had trust issues since i was a kid
it started from when my parents wrongfully beat me cause they thought i hurt my brother when in reality he did it to himself, i never got the chance to explain and i never have

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i was also|| sa'd|| as a kid, since they were so close to me as a kid i thought it was normal, theres nothing wrong
until i gre up and realized it was wrong

this wasnt a one time thing, it happened several times over the span of a few yrs when i was a kid.

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theres a couple more stuff to share, i'll do it later

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take care everyone :)

runic charm Jul 8, 2024, 3:14 PM

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life's not worth living anymore.

runic charm Jul 8, 2024, 5:58 PM

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emotions

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jealousy was different than how i thought it feels like.

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it burns

runic charm Jul 9, 2024, 7:34 PM

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idk im indecisive

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everything feels normal

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but its not

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:09 AM

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runic charm but its not

kinda normal

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:10 AM

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runic charm i was also|| sa'd|| as a kid, since they were so close to me as a kid i thought ...

children who experience trauma never realize it is wrong until years later

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:11 AM

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runic charm i dont remember half of my childhood

i dont either lol

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:11 AM

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runic charm i can't socialize first things, the ppl i talk to school (which happend kinda ra...

you always can

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playing outside is a great way to do so

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we as humans and people are defined by our own experiences in life

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its what gives us personality in a way

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ive been through a lot in my life ive seen a lot and ive experinced a lot

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your experinces is what can give you strength

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it also always doesnt define who you are

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:46 AM

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loud ginkgo playing outside is a great way to do so

theres no one

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:46 AM

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theres always someone

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:47 AM

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nope

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none

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:48 AM

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how old ru

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if your in college or close enough there get out a lot

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interact and socialize with the people there it'll help

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:49 AM

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im not, im just in high school

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:49 AM

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talk to people

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its summer now

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:49 AM

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i wish i could

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:49 AM

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you can

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:49 AM

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how?

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:49 AM

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you talk

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hang out with people find someone you like and talk

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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to who? there is literally no one

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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doesnt work if you dont try

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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runic charm to who? there is literally no one

its a highschool

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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how can i try?

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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theres bound to be someone

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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loud ginkgo its a highschool

school is closed

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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runic charm how can i try?

approach someone

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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its vacation

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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runic charm school is closed

duh

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when it starts up

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just try

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theres no matter

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:50 AM

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theres no time to, classes r packed as it is

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:51 AM

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thats school

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there is time

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dont make execuses for yourself

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nothing changes unless you take the initiative to change it yourself

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remember that

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you define your own story

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:52 AM

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those interactions r tbh meaningless

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i might see them once and have a good convo but eventually thats where its going to stop

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:53 AM

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how are you gonna want advice but be to ignorant to look past your own comfort zone

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try and talk hold a converstation longer then a short one

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you have to try

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:54 AM

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i have, ive made some connections but they're in vain, i can't even keep contact with anyone for longer than a week

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:54 AM

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your on here

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on discord

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you can try

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:55 AM

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i cant use it, im not supposed but hell i need to talk to someone

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:55 AM

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loud ginkgo you can try

ive gotten caught twice another one is bound to happen

loud ginkgo Jul 10, 2024, 10:56 AM

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then again talk to people at your own school

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uphold those converstations

runic charm Jul 10, 2024, 10:58 AM

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loud ginkgo then again talk to people at your own school

i can never keep conversations with them

runic charm Jul 11, 2024, 8:24 PM

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my mind's a mess

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but there's lots of things to do b4 school begins

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idk how to feel

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my sleep schedule is becoming worse by the second

runic charm Jul 12, 2024, 6:32 PM

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ik i shouldn't be jealous

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but i can't help it, i mean it's stupid

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but i hate it

runic charm Jul 12, 2024, 7:53 PM

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i can't find my blade, i lost it

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i looked everywhere but i can't find it

runic charm Jul 14, 2024, 9:34 AM

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im going to delete this

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i find no use in it

#idk im indecisive