#idk im indecisive

85 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

runic charm
#

idk how to start things off but i saw someone post thing as 'parts' i might follow that and post when im ready

runic charm
#

idk if im gonna follow the part thing but heres a rant

#

i can't socialize first things, the ppl i talk to school (which happend kinda rarely) is the only socialization i have, tho i have a frnd grp, my mom finds it stupid and i should leave
can i go out with friends tho? nope. can i talk to them online? nope. i cant even use discord but i just have to use it behind their backs

#

i dont remember half of my childhood

#

most of it

#

idk why (prolly cause of underlying trauma but im not a psychiatrist) i do have some good memories but more than that i have bad ones
i've had trust issues since i was a kid
it started from when my parents wrongfully beat me cause they thought i hurt my brother when in reality he did it to himself, i never got the chance to explain and i never have

#

i was also|| sa'd|| as a kid, since they were so close to me as a kid i thought it was normal, theres nothing wrong
until i gre up and realized it was wrong

this wasnt a one time thing, it happened several times over the span of a few yrs when i was a kid.

#

theres a couple more stuff to share, i'll do it later

#

take care everyone :)

runic charm
#

life's not worth living anymore.

runic charm
#

emotions

#

jealousy was different than how i thought it feels like.

#

it burns

runic charm
#

idk im indecisive

#

everything feels normal

#

but its not

loud ginkgo
loud ginkgo
loud ginkgo
loud ginkgo
#

playing outside is a great way to do so

#

we as humans and people are defined by our own experiences in life

#

its what gives us personality in a way

#

ive been through a lot in my life ive seen a lot and ive experinced a lot

#

your experinces is what can give you strength

#

it also always doesnt define who you are

runic charm
loud ginkgo
#

theres always someone

runic charm
#

nope

#

none

loud ginkgo
#

how old ru

#

if your in college or close enough there get out a lot

#

interact and socialize with the people there it'll help

runic charm
#

im not, im just in high school

loud ginkgo
#

talk to people

#

its summer now

runic charm
#

i wish i could

loud ginkgo
#

you can

runic charm
#

how?

loud ginkgo
#

you talk

#

hang out with people find someone you like and talk

runic charm
#

to who? there is literally no one

loud ginkgo
#

doesnt work if you dont try

loud ginkgo
runic charm
#

how can i try?

loud ginkgo
#

theres bound to be someone

runic charm
loud ginkgo
runic charm
#

its vacation

loud ginkgo
#

when it starts up

#

just try

#

theres no matter

runic charm
#

theres no time to, classes r packed as it is

loud ginkgo
#

thats school

#

there is time

#

dont make execuses for yourself

#

nothing changes unless you take the initiative to change it yourself

#

remember that

#

you define your own story

runic charm
#

those interactions r tbh meaningless

#

i might see them once and have a good convo but eventually thats where its going to stop

loud ginkgo
#

how are you gonna want advice but be to ignorant to look past your own comfort zone

#

try and talk hold a converstation longer then a short one

#

you have to try

runic charm
#

i have, ive made some connections but they're in vain, i can't even keep contact with anyone for longer than a week

loud ginkgo
#

your on here

#

on discord

#

you can try

runic charm
#

i cant use it, im not supposed but hell i need to talk to someone

runic charm
loud ginkgo
#

then again talk to people at your own school

#

uphold those converstations

runic charm
runic charm
#

my mind's a mess

#

but there's lots of things to do b4 school begins

#

idk how to feel

#

my sleep schedule is becoming worse by the second

runic charm
#

ik i shouldn't be jealous

#

but i can't help it, i mean it's stupid

#

but i hate it

runic charm
#

i can't find my blade, i lost it

#

i looked everywhere but i can't find it

runic charm
#

im going to delete this

#

i find no use in it