Study journal

[potent locust]

I think i've adhd, depression, anxiety. I'm suffering. But i can't get clinically approved or meds. My family thinks mental problem isn't a big issue,it's just loneliness. But tbh i can't even function properly in daily life.
So,i actually need to get out of this household. Once i get into an university, i'll be able to live alone and i can also get check-up. I've 2 exams, one in july and the other one in the last week of october. I've been procrastinating a lot, i can't focus easily, i also get panic attacks. So,the thing is if i don't study all day from now on i can't even get into the universities. So,i'll tell here how many hours i'm studying in a day. I want to keep myself in a track. And i want y'all to help me. If it seems that i didn’t study enough hours, can y'all ask me and motivate me, please?
Fyi I've been preparing for medical, so, i literally have to study all day, daily 3 to 4 hours would do nothing. I've to at least study for 14 hours a day as i also procrastinated before. I'll ask everyone to be polite and respectful here. And please help me be on track. I really need to get out of here asap. And this is the only way.
I will start counting from today.

[sullen fern]

Hey, I can totally understand how important it is for you to study and get into university. It's great that you want to keep track of your study hours and stay motivated. I'll be here to support you and remind you to stay on track. Just remember to take breaks and take care of yourself too. You got this!

[potent locust]

Thanksss a lot

I self studied for 4 hours today and 3 hours tuition. In total 7 hours. But i'm not gonna add the tuition hours, self study is the main thing. I literally tried to study at least more than 6 hours. It's a failure. I'm gonna try tomorrow to do a few hours more. I'm studying 3 or 4 hours for the last few days. If this keeps on i'll have to die. Let's keep hope,i'll do better tmr in sha Allah.

[sullen fern]

I understand that you're feeling frustrated about your study hours today. It's great that you're putting in effort and trying to study for more than 6 hours. Remember, every bit of studying counts, even if it's not as much as you hoped for. Don't be too hard on yourself. Just keep pushing forward and stay positive. You got this!

[sullen fern]

No problem!

[potent locust]

I studied for 6 hours and 40 minutes today and 1 hour tuition. I finally passed 6 hours. I'll try to do better tmr in sha Allah. I actually do this for 2 to 3 days and then again i slack off and don't study at all for the next few days. I don’t have consistency.

Today was hard. I couldn’t stop thinking about dying. Idk, but , from the core of my heart, i really think this world isn't for me. I can't survive here. The world is just a threat to me.

[sullen fern]

That's great that you put in so much effort today consistency can be challenging, but you've already shown that you can study for long periods of time. Keep pushing yourself and remember to take breaks too. You got this

[sullen fern]

Try staying positive with urself don’t focus on that negative shit cuz u should live ur life to fullest just cuz u had a bad day doesn’t mean everyday is gonna be a bad day and that’s just life. You have good days and bad days. If everyday was a good day and u had no stress or anything like that then u wouldn’t even have anything to look forward to. Remember how u aren’t actually alone and that there’s millions of other people that go through things too and remember how u have people u can count on for support and u can hmu too if u needa talk. Stay positive no matter how negative life gets. Ur mind is just playing tricks with u don’t believe the negative things cuz it’s just tricks. Think positively and stay motivated and never stop just keep going things get better with time. I can help u stay positive just hmu. Ik u can still survive and keep going u seem like a really smart person judging from how u study a lot and that’s a good thing so just keep it up. You should live ur life to the fullest cuz u only live on earth once then u don’t get to experience any of the great things u can do here. That’s y u live ur life to the fullest. I’m sure ur young and u have experienced a lot of great things and I want u to go ahead to and do that and don’t stop for no one and don’t let anyone bring u down. I feel like ur gonna have a great future if u really keep up the grind. Remenber u have people to help u through ur life. Once again if u need someone to talk to u can hmu I gotchu

[potent locust]

Thank you so much. But i'm in such a position that i can't even think positive even if i try to. My friends or family,no one's there to support me, everyone's minding their own business and my family, they are the one's who make me think negative about everything. So for just now,i'm not thinking anything, whenever something negative is coming to my mind, i'm just trying to ignore it as much as possible. I'm trying to survive and I'll try in future too, cause i believe in the afterlife. But sometimes even breathing seems difficult and it's been 2 years, i'm still suffering. Just thinking about the possibility that I'll have to suffer like this in future too,makes me miserable. Again,thanks. Your words literally makes me feel better. I'll dm you if i have further problems.

[potent locust]

Self studied for 4 hours today,again demotion. When will i be consistent? How to be consistent? Oke,doesn’t matter,let's try tmr

[sullen fern]

Np just surround urself with positive people and not let the negativity get to u because it doesn’t even matter don’t let that bring u down just keep going to be successful in ur life there’s no point of trying to get rid of ur life because the life u have heard is a blessing so take full of advantage of it by living it to the fullest and I’m guessing ur Muslim cuz of u said the term “inshallah” and Ik a lot about Islam just hmu in DMs about it cuz I wanna talk to u about that. And life is not just about suffering it may seem bad now but it’ll all get better u just gotta work ur way through it and I believe u can do that and Ik ull get it done and I’m glad I could make u feel better hmu for wtv u need

[sullen fern]

4 hours is actually a lot keep that up

Just pace urself with ur work

So it doesn’t become heavy

Then it’ll make u stressed out and u wouldn’t wanna do it no more

So just take it slow

[potent locust]

It's actually not considering i slacked off before.

[sullen fern]

If u feel like 4 hours is not enough try studying more or ask someone to help you with studying so u can understand it better

[potent locust]

Got no one tbh

[sullen fern]

Teachers?

[potent locust]

I actually don't have problems in the topics, i mean understanding them.i'm just struggling to focus for a long time. Teachers can't help me focus for a long time 🙂 it would have been good if i had a study partner.. But where do i find one. But i recently started the pomodoro technique, it also ain't helping much cause i still get distracted

I studied for 4 hours yesterday again. I need to level up fr

[sullen fern]

I feel like teachers can help u focus better, and maybe u can join a study server on discord or find one irl to join. Ik ull be able to pull it off I believe in u

[sullen fern]

I feel like 4 hours is a lot tho 😭

[potent locust]

It's not, in terms of getting into a medical college 😭 my classmates are literally studying 24/7

[sullen fern]

I feel like ur gonna be able to pull it off tho cuz u seem like a smart person

[potent locust]

5 hours for today