I feel like I have suddenly developed OCD, it's driving me mad

[cosmic crag]

So... long story short, over the course of the last month or so I've developed sexual orientation related OCD that causes me to ruminate about it constantly at times, which causes a lot of anxiety and just scares the hell of me that I'm gonna live like this forever. I don't even care about whatever ma sexuality might be, I just wanna be confident in it and not ruminate over it again and again. So yeah, it's driving me mad... And the worst thing is that in this country where I live there's very little hope in finding a serious licensed therapist (as opposed to those I've previously run into that were complete scams) who has available capacity for new patients, and even those have waiting periods up to a whole year. So don't really know what to with this, I just wanna live like I did two months ago and not be an anxious mess forever :/

[tulip star]

there are many high quality resources on yt if u know where to look

ill send u some in dms

[cosmic crag]

yeah I know there's a lot of resources, but in my case it's super specific and haven't really been able to find anything that fits my case

cus I don't have just your usual HOCD

[tulip star]

yes because u wont , you have to get to know the techniques and personalize that for yourself

start with mindfulness

nothing fits any case perfectly

[cosmic crag]

yeah... I just don't know if I can do it alone is the thing

[tulip star]

most of therapy systems are build to be indirect

the therapist wont generally tell u exactly what you should do, a lot of therapy is just trying things out tbh

noone is a savant to know all of your subjective factors and the perfect treatment

[cosmic crag]

yeah I know