heartbreak?

[young cairn]

Ik this is cliche but I just wanted to vent..
I feel so hurt idk what to do. It’s so hard. Sometimes I just feel like I’m the on at fault, I feel like it’s all my fault. Idek how to explain how I feel.
One moment I feel like im over him and the next moment I feel heartbroken again. It’s so hard to forget him. Every time I feel like i like a guy, I end up comparing them to him and I end up not liking them. I thought it’s just a matter of time and I thought I’d be over it soon. Maybe it is a matter of time but im just sensitive. I feel dumb sometimes cuz he’s over me and im still stuck here thinking of him.
I just rlly wish im not sensitive. Being sensitive feels like crap. I get upset for even small things ppl say as a joke. I hope I’ll be able to forget about all this one day… and im scared I might go through all that again, im scared to love someone.
I feel like I’ve ruined my own life…
(I understand if y’all cringed reading this)

[dense grove]

You love him the way. You found him in everyone you meet. And start comparing if you ever feel like - his smile looks like him or his hair etc. ?

[young cairn]

We broke up on good terms but every time I feel like I want to move on or date, I feel no one can replace him

[river mural]

how long u arent together?

mainly its a matter of making sense of the situation instead of catastrophising and thinking "its all my fault" and "noone can replace him", attachment dissolves with time

[dense grove]

It sucks, but it's not your fault that you missed him and everything remind him. He moved on but you can't. And it's oky.

[dense grove]

But sometimes attachment increase with time. When you are away from them

[river mural]

since when?

its litteraly the opposite

for attachment to get re-inforced u have to spend time with the person

ofc rumination makes the process longer but it only prolongs it, doesnt make it bigger

[dense grove]

When you spent a whole day with them and after it you are like - It was a good day he/she was with me.
But when it's distance you missed them every moment

[river mural]

when u breakup and the person is no longer available attachment begins to dissolve

r logic is within a completely different context that the situation she is talking about

[dense grove]

Yep, but it was mutual decision

[river mural]

and attachment doesnt equal longing *facepalm

[river mural]

and how does that changes anything?

its all calibrated by the individual, for some its more painful if u breakup on good terms bcs u wanted it to work out, for some its more painful on bad terms bcs the partner hurts them more

[dense grove]

He moved on, but she can't

[dense grove]

True,