#how do i help my girlfriend with body dysmorphia

5 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

fresh tangle
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my girl is experiencing body dysmorphia to the point where she cannot eat, how do i help?

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amber wind
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I’m not really experienced on this but this is how I would want someone to help me ig

Compliment her
If it’s a irl relationship and you can, take her out to eat
Eat on ft wit her
Tell her how beautiful she looks in the outfit she’s wearing when you see it
Make sure she’s eaten that day (ask her everyday in the afternoon)

mental spruce
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Complimenting a person with body dysmorphia could inadvertently encourage them towards self-starvation behaviors, so it is inadvisable. Definitely the best thing is for her is to seek professional help and come up with a treatment plan, and then you as her boyfriend can support her through that treatment plan. What you can do right now though is empathetically listen to her, please listen to her feelings and experiences fully without any judgment. People with BDD tend to think or obsess that appearances are of the utmost importance, so it's more essential when you talk to her to bring the conversation away from how she looks and into how she feels, because then you may be able to help validate her as a human being and slowly restore her sense of worth unconditionally.

These are two steps in having an empathetic and validating conversation:

  1. Validating their feelings and experiences: Acknowledge the emotional distress they're going through without judgment, and let them know that you're there to support them.
  2. Encouraging their strengths and positive qualities: Focus on non-appearance-related aspects of their personality or achievements, such as their kindness, intelligence, or creativity.

But it's complicated, a few good conversations won't fully solve this, I really recommend you try to ask her to seek professional help. You should also educate yourself on BDD and read the top books in the field so that you can help understand her more, recognize very dangerous signs, and help her the most effectively.

fresh tangle