#am I bad for haring my abuser?

194 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

rapid basin
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God and dad tells me to love my brother but what do you do when he abuses you?

somber kettle
rapid basin
somber kettle
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He wouldn't be abusing you if he loved you.

rapid basin
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But it’s not as bad as it used to be

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It’s not violence all the time

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He still shows affection

somber kettle
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My advice, cut those people out of your life.

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Abuse is abuse.

rapid basin
somber kettle
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You can still distance yourself from them.

rapid basin
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How?

rapid basin
somber kettle
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Just stop talking to him. You might feel guilty for this, but this is something you need to do.

rapid basin
somber kettle
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Don't try to change him if this has been a reoccurring thing, these people only change of their own will.

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This is something I don't think can be fixed.

rapid basin
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I’m not trying to change him

somber kettle
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You also need to set boundaries.

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Easiest way to distance yourself is to slowly do it each day.

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Eventually he will realize that you don't want him in your life.

errant flower
rapid basin
errant flower
rapid basin
errant flower
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Well he might be angry with you if you did that or do something will always done

rapid basin
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Be friends

errant flower
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Like cmon @somber kettle wake up

rapid basin
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But what if the solution

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I don’t know

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I just want help

errant flower
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We dont live in the world of private peace unless you make up for it in the mind of fighting for it

errant flower
rapid basin
rapid basin
errant flower
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Meaning the world isnt always peaceful

rapid basin
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I don’t want to hurt him

errant flower
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Or slience in peaceful

errant flower
rapid basin
errant flower
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Like what is his personality in a sense of word

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Like what does he do...decribe him on a normal day (requal baseity)

rapid basin
errant flower
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Hmm

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So he's a drunk addict? He doesnt sound like it but like

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What cause him to become that

rapid basin
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He’s not

somber kettle
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Drunk? Addict? Are you even reading half the text here?

rapid basin
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He’s never drunken in his life

errant flower
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Oh well..

rapid basin
rapid basin
errant flower
somber kettle
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@rapid basin you can love someone without putting up with abuse

errant flower
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...

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Even if she loves him it could be abit wrose well depends

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Like showing love I dk man

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Could help

rapid basin
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I’m getting three different messages

somber kettle
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what religion are you cause you said god was part of your reasoning

errant flower
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Forget what he said

somber kettle
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rude

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All I've heard is philosophies and not actual advice from you. ^

rapid basin
somber kettle
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oh cool

errant flower
rapid basin
errant flower
somber kettle
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dude stop being so rude

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And you're telling me to wake up?

rapid basin
somber kettle
rapid basin
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I hate it but I believe in iy

errant flower
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Im trying to understand what cause your father to be like that is the main story

rapid basin
errant flower
errant flower
rapid basin
errant flower
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Alright stay

rapid basin
errant flower
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@somber kettle stay

somber kettle
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getting mixed signals here

errant flower
errant flower
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Keep talking

somber kettle
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@rapid basin i’m assuming you’re in the united states right

rapid basin
somber kettle
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oh cool

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i usually associate jw with america

rapid basin
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No, wrong flag

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Oops

errant flower
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oof maybe because of wars which. Doesnt seem to be the case

rapid basin
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I meant yes

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It was a mistake

errant flower
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Ah

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Alright son your brother got issuies went to live with his grandparents

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Hes gone of that house right?

somber kettle
rapid basin
rapid basin
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My grandparents are jews

errant flower
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Hmm...what if you switch?

errant flower
rapid basin
rapid basin
somber kettle
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yeah i’m back

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i was giving my dogs a treat

errant flower
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Also ukraineian jews

somber kettle
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land of arabic?

errant flower
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German jews

rapid basin
errant flower
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Ita near jordans and lebon

somber kettle
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you know jw isn’t jew right

errant flower
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Also egypt

errant flower
rapid basin
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I misspelled

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JW is a cult

somber kettle
errant flower
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Oof what is it?

somber kettle
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💀

rapid basin
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I mis spelled jw as jew

somber kettle
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this guy don’t even know

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wait so you are jewish?💀

rapid basin
somber kettle
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ok good i was confused for a sec

rapid basin
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I just accidentally said jew

rapid basin
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How have we strayed so far lmao

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(Not blaming you)

somber kettle
rapid basin
somber kettle
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go to the police

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that’s always my step 1, 2, and 3

rapid basin
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He just comes over

somber kettle
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what were the results

rapid basin
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He got probation

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And is not allowed in our house unless given written permission

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Or direct permission

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Or whatever

somber kettle
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at least that’s a w

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for both your brother and father or just father

rapid basin
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My brother is just confused

somber kettle
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wdym

rapid basin
# somber kettle wdym

He’s mostly just kinda going wherever he’s told to go and just kinda lost cuz his entire life just changed

somber kettle
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wait so what’s the specific problem currently

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your brother?

rapid basin
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He screams at me

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And can be really scary

somber kettle
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sorry for delay

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i hope you aren’t scared to take action because of your religion though

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If you truly want to repair the relationship, then he has to take the steps to stop abusing you.

rapid basin
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I don’t want to repair

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My father does

somber kettle
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If you don't want to, then you should tell your father that, whether he likes it or not.

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He needs to realize.

rapid basin
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My father doesn’t give a shit

somber kettle
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As I said before I got cut off, distancing is your best option.

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I truly hope this stops though.

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I'm here if you need somebody to talk to.

somber kettle
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so much for a supportive environment💀

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How am I being rude? I gave advice when asked for.

rapid basin
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How do I distance though?

somber kettle
somber kettle
rapid basin
somber kettle
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well i’m assuming you can’t move away for whatever reasons

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i’m sure you’ve tried it but could you reach out to family of any kind

rapid basin
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I can’t

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They don’t like ys

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Cuz we are the family cultists

somber kettle
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if the police worked with your dad mostly what about your brother

rapid basin
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My brother is ok

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He’s just kinda chilling

somber kettle
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wait so what’s wrong

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i was under the impression with your father under probation your brother’s anger was the issue

rapid basin
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Oh

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My brother’s on probation

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He’s chilling rn

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Not hurting me

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At this exact moment

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God, this got so muddy with all the arguments and shit

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So my situation is my brother is on probation and comes over occasionally and my father is a drunk who makes my brother come over occasionally

somber kettle
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honestly i think the real solution is to just leave them if possible