🌈lgbtq

[wicked jungle]

they would definitively know something's up if i had sport-related stuff on my walls tbh 😂

[dry swift]

You think I am?! How dare thee.

Fine. A chess poster or something.

[wicked jungle]

i am boring, all my fan stuff is either poster-less or doesnt have nice posters 😭

or it's gay, that's one reason i breathe for

[shy meteor]

ajkfdjdf
I am kind of at a loss rn
I am in a situation where I want to change my first name because it's my dead name, and, like, I can legally change it because name changing law is tied to the country you were born here and while Germany doesn't just let you change your name my birth country does
And that's such a weird situation because literally nobody I know has gone through this kind of situation and I don't even know how to start asking about the process

First of all, the process is expensive but that put aside, it also requires me to skedaddle my way over to the embassy and that's far away

and I can't call anyone over there right now because of the 'rona to ask all my questions

and I can't really afford just skedaddling there willy nilly not knowing what I need to bring to get the process started

And one person told me I need original documents and another told me all I need is legal copies or whatever and-
ugh.

Why does bureaucracy make it so hard to be who you wanna be

sowwy for tiny rant

[dry swift]

Because bureaucracy is annoying to deal with on a personal level but good for the majority of people... generally.

[shy meteor]

it was a rhetorical question

But still, it feels like things - especially in Germany - are made unnecessarily difficult for people

[wicked jungle]

it's already unnecessarily difficult for white cis het lads in germany ._.

ofc it'll be at least quadruple the amount for the minorities ,_,

[shy meteor]

it's difficult in Germany to do literally anything that requires dealing with bureaucracy

but yeah it only gets more difficult with every layer added...

[wicked jungle]

yeah i always gag when there is something with alot of paperwork

[shy meteor]

yeppppp

[wicked jungle]

like just end me, who needs that bs

probably why there are soooooooooooo many places and job offerings for people who make that easier for you/do all the work for you

maybe i should get into law 🤔 i'd suck at it but at least i wouldnt get nearly as looked down upon

[shy meteor]

I actually study law (and sociology) and I hope to get into a position where I can help people who go through these kinds of troubles

get them set up with all the paperwork, help them through it, get them into therapy and evaluations and help them with social transitioning

[wicked jungle]

ima write down your name if i ever wanna do the step of changing my name if you dont mind 👀

[shy meteor]

hahaha I am far from there yet sadly pwp

[wicked jungle]

and i am far from the step too hahaha qwq

[shy meteor]

I hope that at some point I can be that person, though

Aw that's valid though, all of that is... a lot. It's most important to be happy and comfortable in your situation

at least, like, considering what the situation is

[wicked jungle]

i mean i just recently accepted the fact that my dysphoria didnt go away during puberty like it often gets said, i just got forced to ignore it

there are some stats that say that children who are uncomfortable in their bodies often lose that sense of non-comfort and i believed to be the same for so many years ignoring the obvious signs and honestly pain

[shy meteor]

I don't think it ever "just goes away", that's something that transgender people are very often told and it just isn't true... puberty usually makes it worse, actually

[wicked jungle]

and now having accepted that i dont want to be addressed as woman just sucks because it will sound like i am a typical snowflake who "chose" to be this. but why the fuck would anybody chose this???

[shy meteor]

Exactly

[wicked jungle]

i would love to be happy in my body, i would kill to not feel disgust upon seeing my birthname or having to write it down or cringing at friends introducing me as that

[shy meteor]

you and I and a whole bunch of other people suffer because people claim "You grow out of it", "it's a phase", "you made it up"...

[shy meteor]

I felt that so hard omg..

[wicked jungle]

phases exist, yeah sure

but i feel that a "phase" isnt what comes close to my situtation.

i am no temporary moon-crescent.

[shy meteor]

not like this, though. You can choose to have a phase for a certain style of clothing or music you like or stuff like that. Those are things that may or may not change.
But who you are is set. It doesn't just go away. That's why it's so important to acknowledge that trans people didn't change to a different gender, they were that gender all along.

[wicked jungle]

my identity/attraction are not temporary like the phases of the seasons.
if they just were a phase i would feel very angry at my own mind 😂

[shy meteor]

calling someone's gender identity a "phase" just because they are going through the very difficult process of figuring it out while also fighting bias and disapproval is so, so disregarding

[wicked jungle]

hence why the "you looked good as a [assigned birthsex here] as well" just suck

[shy meteor]

exactly

[wicked jungle]

like i didnt come true to my identity just to be more pretty tf??

[shy meteor]

the thing is that people can go through this process in very different ways, maybe starting at "I was assigned this gender but it doesn't feel right, I'll dip my toe into exploring this other gender that might make me comfortable" going to "This wasn't quite right I need to change something this is hard what am I even doing" And this process may repeat or take turns all the time until they end up somewhere they feel comfortable.
And from the outside people see a person "changing their gender as they please" because "idk they feel like it".
And it's just... so hard to explain to someone who hasn't gone through this

that it's not like snap you wake up and know who you are or you know since birth or whatever for everyone
And that they completely ignore the struggle this comes with

[wicked jungle]

i'm here to be comfortable
it just sucks that we live in a time that even when you're yourself finally you will not be comfortable to a similar degree like cis hets
hence why i am personally insanely jealous and honestly spiteful towards them even though i dont want to be that person. it just hurts that they get that part of their life gifted to them with no issues and that there exist those who still insist on being undermined and discriminated against because of something they were gifted on a silver platter.
cis hets do have their own issues, absolutely, not taking away this or the "straight passing" lads, absolutely. everybody is human, everybody went through some bs and lived but it's unfair that they get to decide on something they actually dont live through.

[wicked jungle]

yeah coming to terms with being trans varies so much from person to person

it's also hard to make it understandable "why are you trans/gay/bi/whatever" or "when did you find out"?
IDK SELINA I SPENT LIKE 10 YEARS DOUBTING AND HATING MYSELF

[shy meteor]

I know what you mean with jealous and spiteful. It would be easier to not have to go through these things. If we just work towards acceptance and making things normal, however, one day I hope we won't need to even state or explain what gender someone is or what sexuality because

1. it's nobody's business
   and 2. It's NOBODY'S BUSINESS

[wicked jungle]

being without doubt of your identity seems like magic to me

i still seem like a fraud, still make excuses that would "explain" me

[shy meteor]

fjksdlfjkl I felt that

There is this thing someone once said that goes "if you think you are making something up that is a pretty good indicator that you are not."

[wicked jungle]

cause that's how i grew up. needing to explain every single non-regular thing.
Why do i like girls, why do i find sexual attraction to be foreign, why do i exist
i dont know. i just do
and i'm tired of having to hammer down on me being just as human as everybody else. i just went some extra steps to accept MYSELF. i dont want to go extra steps to make a stranger accept me.

hence why i didnt even think of telling you that "Jessica" isnt for me lmao

[shy meteor]

Basically... all your emotions and what you feel and all those things you go through
Exist
They are real and valid because you experience them and nobody can take that away or tell you otherwise. Nobody can invalidate that. That would be like telling you you're not really a person you are actually a chicken, even though you have experienced the life of a person, not that of a chicken.

[wicked jungle]

i just dont want to explain myself anymore

[shy meteor]

You shouldn't have to

[wicked jungle]

but i do because i dont belong to the "norm"

even if I know that straight isn't the norm - it's just the majority doesnt mean everybody understands.

[shy meteor]

And trust me when I say this with all my sincerity: I accept you. No matter if you want to go by a different name because of your gender identity or because you don't like the sound or just because it's your Tuesday name and today is Monday. You are valid, you have the right to be comfortable and it's nobody's goshdarn soup why the heck you want to go by a different name.

[wicked jungle]

my best gaming buddies always throw around homophobic slurs and it hurts. they are/were friends. and they still wouldnt take me as a person but instead i was the "joke"

[wicked jungle]

you're gonna make me tear up goddamnit

actually the waterworks are already flowing brb

[shy meteor]

People like that don't understand that they are actually hurting you... What worked for me is being direct about feelings, like, "hey, this hurts, don't say those things they actually affect me."
No "please" and "maybe".
Because, I can't say it enough: Your emotions and feelings MATTER and you have the right to be happy and comfortable!

[shy meteor]

oh dang I'm sorry p~p

[wicked jungle]

lol i did that and they threw me out of the groupchat for being "boring" and "not taking a joke"

[shy meteor]

I'm teary eyed myself but then again I am a huge crybaby

[wicked jungle]

so am i, come here crybaby 😭 hug

[shy meteor]

then screw them, absolute trash into the can with them. It sucks and it hurts but you don't need people like that in your life!

[shy meteor]

[wicked jungle]

is that

https://tenor.com/view/anime-acchi-kocchi-gif-4505883

[shy meteor]

Y e s

[wicked jungle]

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE

ok i'm actually crying this is getting disgusting

[shy meteor]

come here

[wicked jungle]

they are actually nice people, they just reaaaaaaaaally suck in a group together

i had one on one sessions with them for hours and hours and they are so kind and loveable and such dorks

but as soon as the other boys get in they just become disgusting

[shy meteor]

I guess you really see how someone is when they are in a group... But srsly if they say that kind of stuff with total disregard of your feelings then they are nit nice people

[wicked jungle]

the thing is i know most have a group and a private personality so i just leave the group but therefore also lose the private personality (how i lost my best friend lol)

[shy meteor]

If someone is so different in a group you can't stand them when they are that's a pretty telling sign imo :/

[wicked jungle]

hence why this community is just amazing??? there are no weird group vs private personalities, yall are just really cool amazing doods

[shy meteor]

no you

[wicked jungle]

idk everybody i knew has had a very different group personality lol
but this may also just be my surrounding - would be weird ngl

[wicked jungle]

https://tenor.com/view/cat-no-nonono-gif-10782424

[gloomy tendon]

I feel bad for interrupting but I made my cupcakes!

[wicked jungle]

omg yessss

[gloomy tendon]

Basically I made trans flag cupcakes lollll wanna see them?

[wicked jungle]

feel free to always butt-in ;o;
YES

SHOW THE CAKES OF THE CUP

[shy meteor]

Hmmm I only ever met one person who was very different in a group. She was my best friend for 10 years and we had a lot of good times but as soon as we were in a group she'd literally bully me to get laughs and approval out of them

[shy meteor]

YES OMG

[gloomy tendon]

Discord doesn't want to cooperate!!!!!

[shy meteor]

Rude

[wicked jungle]

my bestie had multiple different friendgroups and tended to insanely shift in character/personality depending on who she was with
but so were legit all of my other friends (normalized doing that myself after a while too, but honestly that's only because private settings make me ANXIOUS; like the "why we whispering fam" meme but in Anxiety)

[wicked jungle]

i love them ;O; where are the sprinkles tho :O

[shy meteor]

I love them

[wicked jungle]

did they get nommed? they are so tiny and delish~

[gloomy tendon]

That pink one was smaller before it was the last pink one I did lol

[shy meteor]

I fake being outgoing in groups but inside I'm dying of anxiety haha...

[gloomy tendon]

Thank you for reminding me!!! I forgot!!!

[wicked jungle]

oh no bub :c

[shy meteor]

Those cupcakes look so good I crave frosting now...

[shy meteor]

It's very exhausting can't recommend. It's the same kind of conundrum I'm in with my style of clothing

[wicked jungle]

me in any private conversations or chats tho, surprisingly not our dms tho,but that's probably cause i'm constantly fawning over your creations an talent lmao to forget that "we whispering, fam"

[wicked jungle]

WHY NOT wHOLE CUPCAKES????

[shy meteor]

Also very random note I wanted to dye my hair mint and it ended up slightly purple. Life is full of surprises.

[shy meteor]

Oh no haha I just adore you so much shcjgohkhk

[wicked jungle]

mint into purple sounds like alexandrite kinda hair

[wicked jungle]

THEY GOT THEM RANIBOW SPRIMKLES WOOHOOO

little cakes of joy

[shy meteor]

Mint into Purple sounds like a new age indie metal band

[shy meteor]

SPRINKLES!!

[shy meteor]

IDK MAN MY CRAVINGS ARE BEYOND ME

[wicked jungle]

honestly understandable lmao

[proper knot]

the cupcakes came out well 😄

[gloomy tendon]

I would send u my extra icing but i don't think it would work

[proper knot]

yes, someone else who says icing, this is a good human

[gloomy tendon]

What else could you say? I'm not an english native speaker so I don't think it counts tho lol

[proper knot]

tbf, i flip

Icing to me is thin, can be clear, more glaze like
the other word, using more in the US from what I know, is frosting, which to me is thicker, and more creamy

[gloomy tendon]

Ah that makes sense

[wicked jungle]

frosting be thiccccccccccc

[proper knot]

this ^

[shy meteor]

I say frosting to cake stuff, icing on cookies :0

[proper knot]

that's excusable, but i disagree to cookies and biscuit split

[wicked jungle]

what

oh true cookies can be iced, i've never done had or seen that tho ;-;

[shy meteor]

But there is a saying that goes "that puts the icing on the cake" and to me that sounds like it means "that's just another wrong on top of it"

[wicked jungle]

cookies have to be baked and bacon has to be cooked, on everything else idc

[shy meteor]

Science

[wicked jungle]

sounds like a melanie martinez song lyrics

[civic shadow]

#🍱coral-foodies ?

[shy meteor]

Oh no hahaha

[wicked jungle]

wait it actually is, nvm 😂

[shy meteor]

LOL WHAT

[wicked jungle]

"It's my fault, it's my fault 'cause I put icing on top"
from Strawberry shortcake

[shy meteor]

Grmbl I gotta sleep now, is late oh no... Good night you lovely people pwp

[wicked jungle]

sweet dreams!

[shy meteor]

Lmao wow I gotta listen to that haha

[proper knot]

I feel this Cassiel, but i survive also 😛
sleep well 🙂

[shy meteor]

[untold glacier]

https://twitter.com/lobsterlover/status/1399439636209012746

Leonardo🦞 (@lobsterlover)

happy pride month have some pride lobsters

Retweets

1995

Likes

7006

Twitter · May 31, 2021, 6:56 PM

saw this and reminded me of stephen ! ❤️

[spark jackal]

It's June 1 in here, meaning it's the start of Pride Month!

Happy Pride Month everyone! 🏳️‍🌈

[pure oxide]

Happy Pride!!

[graceful geyser]

happy pride!

[hidden inlet]

happy pride!!!

[blissful granite]

So fun story:
My neighbor decided to fly a Blue Lives Matter flag during the Derek Chauvin Trial (death of George Floyd) and my household has not been happy living next to this. So as of today I've started flying a flag right next to theirs (let me get the image)

This is currently flying outside the house next to it:

[untold glacier]

thats awesome !!!! rooting for you in everyway

[harsh knot]

pride month hath arived, my power grows

[civic shadow]

Every month is pride month for me 😌

For real tho happy pride month yall!! ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[pure crown]

happy pride month

[harsh knot]

yey

time to draw pride warrior for me and my friend

[drowsy holly]

happy prideeee

[hidden inlet]

Happy pride! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Know that even if we get hate for being who we are, our community will always have each other where there are hard times!

🥰

[shy meteor]

Happy Pride month!!

[jolly tendon]

do you have these with like a loop not with the keychain thingy?

[balmy zodiac]

happy pride month everyone

[lost field]

Happy Pride Month, everyone!!!

[orchid flume]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!

[light scroll]

Welcome to the month of

[buoyant valve]

https://tenor.com/view/gay-pride-parade-gif-10645818

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH! 🌈

To all gays, lesbians, transgenders, bixesuals, asexuals, etc., always remember that you are valid! You are loved, valued, and cherished no matter what your identity is! Never let other people discriminate and insult you! Stand strong! Be proud of yourself! Raise your flag! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🥰

[round meadow]

https://tenor.com/view/pride-month-pride-gay-lesbian-pansexual-gif-17376038

[light scroll]

As a closeted transbian, I am very happy for my fellow folks who are out and proud

[orchid flume]

Y'all are valid and I love you!

I'm a non-binary lesbian dating the most wonderful demi bi girl in the world

(She's not a demigirl, she's demi and bi)

[iron escarp]

good for you! im really happy for you and hope you can be out to a level that feels safe and comfortable someday soon!

[orchid flume]

Florida is the worst

[harsh knot]

This

[orchid flume]

My step mom "I'd think you were dating (my partner) by how much you talk about her, only reason I know your not is she's not a boy."
Me: 🤣

[fiery steeple]

historians will one day note how friendly the two of you are

[balmy zodiac]

lmfaooo

hey why is there a slowmode in this channel? i havent noticed it in other channels

[fiery steeple]

it's in the most used channels cause conversations go brrrrr

[orchid flume]

One time we talked about how we wanted to move in together and share a bed but we BOTH mistook it for being friendly

[balmy zodiac]

HAHAHA

that is such a "useless lesbian" move

[orchid flume]

Me: "I know she's bi but she's probably not into me."
Her: "I know they're a lesbian, but they're probably not into me."

[fiery steeple]

it wasn't until the friend marriage they realised it may be something more

[orchid flume]

Her: "You listen to girl in red?"
Me: "Yes."
(Actually has never listened like a boss.)

We got together over the Destiel controversy

[fiery steeple]

lmao

if that ain't a mood

[orchid flume]

The difficulties of being a lesbian

We both accidentally ruined the others confession before

She tried to ask me out but I told her not to talk over She-ra because my favorite pairing was onscreen

[fiery steeple]

oof

[orchid flume]

And when I asked her out she accidentally messed it up by telling me about her tiktok simps.

Reading her Tiktok comments has become my favorite past time because of how weird they are

[harsh knot]

Tiktok comments are simultaneously amusing and bleh to read

[fiery steeple]

I forget exactly what prompted my now partner to express her interest in me

I know I was just out of a real toxic relationship

I wanted to hold off for a while just to make sure she wasn't just my rebound
two weeks later I'm like "yeah I'm ready for this"
coming up on four years later and I've never looked back lmao

[orchid flume]

Tell me about your partner!

[fiery steeple]

we met through D&D of all things lmao

[dry swift]

Listen. Adora and Catra, and Mermista and Seahawk, and Netossa and Spinnerella, and Bow and Glimmer, and Scorpia and Perfuma are all 100% valid pairings and should be met with silence whenever they speak.

[light scroll]

See for me, I married my bi wife and then like a year later was like wait...I'ma woman

[fiery steeple]

she's so loving and supportive
after a few weeks of being with her I was just like "this is what relationships are supposed to be like?? oh my god I've been missing out on so much"

[light scroll]

Awwww

[fiery steeple]

boy that's convenient lmao

[orchid flume]

My OTP is Entrapdak

[light scroll]

Yeah. It's been an adjustment for her since so much is going on but she's at least begun using my other pronouns in our household

[fiery steeple]

hell yeah

[light scroll]

We got...married, moved, and gone through 2 unfortunate preg situations all during COVID year

[orchid flume]

This is so sweet

[dry swift]

Also correct.

[light scroll]

So I don't fault the slow adjustment on her part

[fiery steeple]

yeah that's a lot to deal with

[orchid flume]

I’m so happy for y’all

[light scroll]

Eventually, I'm sure we'll reach a point where she is comfortable going all the way in on my pronouns and name, but for now I'm cool with it being slow-going

My household and online is all where I'm out atm

[orchid flume]

The she-ra server I mod is really rude to my partner and I and it makes me very sad

[orchid flume]

I’m supporting you all the way

My partner is a cis girl who uses she/they and several people told her she’s NB and in denial

[light scroll]

I'm not yet at the golden 30s so I've got time

[orchid flume]

Hell yeah!

[light scroll]

Ya know, like...people who identify as cis can still be cozy with they. Like, that's the beauty of pronoun variance and identity

[fiery steeple]

pronouns literally don't matter lol I don't get why people make such a big deal out of it

[light scroll]

My one friend is She/He gender-fluid and hates if people use they because she actually prefers remaining on the binary

[fiery steeple]

like they is gender neutral
why cause a stink over such a harmless word

[orchid flume]

I've also been told I'm not a real lesbian because I'm non-binary and prefer they/them and take away the term from real lesbians

[light scroll]

[harsh knot]

This!

[dry swift]

Never let anybody, and I mean anybody, define your terms for you. You are you, and you are whoever you define yourself to be.

[orchid flume]

I mean, I'm afab, I present feminine, and I would rather be seen as a gorl than a guy but alright. Sorry there's a limited number of people who can use the world lesbian

[harsh knot]

I’m cis and I actually just realized that I prefer he/they pronouns

[orchid flume]

Hell YES!

[light scroll]

Yeah, there are people out there who think transwomen taint lesbians. It's wild

[fiery steeple]

I once got verbally abused for saying I was gay when I'm a girl
because apparently gay can only ever refer to homosexual guys 🙄

[light scroll]

Me, a trans lesbian

[orchid flume]

I'm actually genderfluid, I was told to use the term "gay" because that wouldn't be taking the lesbian term

[harsh knot]

Label gatekeeping is >:( let people identify how they want to

[orchid flume]

I'm genderfluid between non-binary and fully female so let me switch my pronouns real quick

[light scroll]

People in the LGBTQIA+ community being gatekeeping is always wild

[harsh knot]

Agreed

[fiery steeple]

the single most toxic server I've ever been in was a transfem server

[orchid flume]

I once had to argue with my friend (a trans guy) who insisted calling they/them enbies he didn't like it/its wasn't transphobic because he was still respecting their gender

God I'm sorry

[fiery steeple]

anyone who didn't use female pronouns got abused for it
except for the mod who didn't use female pronouns

[light scroll]

That's wild af

[orchid flume]

My first ever girlfriend was a lovely trans girl. We were not compatible but I think she's a wonderful friend and deserves her amazing girlfriend.
Doesn't mean I was at all happy when she commissioned my partner but that's a story for another time.

[light scroll]

Like I get wanting a space solely for a group of people, but like...I dunno

[fiery steeple]

got called a ||cunt|| and a cishet bootlicker for disagreeing with someone's headcanon about a character that explicitly went against stated canon

then I got in trouble for causing drama

[orchid flume]

My ex friend: "I don't know where it lives."
Me: "they use they/them only."
Him: "Well it/its is still gender neutral so I'm not misgendering."

[light scroll]

I- Like I will say that Tali in MAss Effect or Cassandra in Dragon Age should be Bi. But I'm not gonna like erase a characters existing sexuality

[orchid flume]

I have gotten shit because I don't like changing the pronouns of canon characters. I have OC's and I would be sad if people changed any of their pronouns, even my token cis girl.

[fiery steeple]

that's the thing, sexualities are rarely stated so that technically doesn't go against canon
this was referring to a character's identity, who had been stated by the creators to be cisgender, when there were other LGBT folks in the series

and it wasn't a mere "I think they should be trans"
it was "THEY ARE TRANS AND IF YOU DISAGREE YOU'RE WRONG"

[orchid flume]

I once had a really abusive ex friend I don't talk to call me a transphobe because I didn't know they headcanoned All Might was Genderfluid.

[fiery steeple]

there's so much to unpack with that statement

[orchid flume]

So All Might was boasting to my enby characte about having four girlfriends and they said, "Imagine having four girlfriends, I can't since I'm gay."

Where did I imply All Might wasn't Genderfluid with that statement?

[signal hull]

Yaaay happy pride month y'all! Finally where I am

[fiery steeple]

there's so much more to unpack with that statement

[jade tartan]

That boils down to how aggresive peoples get when soneone has a different opinion. All is good as long as its civil and nobody force anything on another person, no?

[signal hull]

Oops sorry didn't realize a serious convo*** was happening :(

[fiery steeple]

cinco?

[light scroll]

Life is weird

[fiery steeple]

if only most people could understand that

[fiery steeple]

oh lmao
nah it's not that serious, just talkin about wack folks we've dealt with lmao

[orchid flume]

Yee!

[light scroll]

Arknights is an interesting game because they like never state a characters sexuality for instance. So I just assume so many of them are gay

[signal hull]

I like that. Reversing the assumed norm 8D

[light scroll]

Listen, it's a mobile base filled with buff strong women and some buff strong men. No one is straight there

[harsh knot]

Aaaa I really wanna confess to someone I’ve known for a while but I don’t know if he’ll accept and he’s a good friend, I don’t wanna make things awkward between him and I if it goes wrong

[fiery steeple]

Dead By Daylight started out avoiding any mention of identity or sexuality
as time went on they gradually fell into cis/heteronormativity and once they realised they issued a public apology in their next community update and promised to do better
I'm pretty sure nobody even called them out on it

[fiery steeple]

if it wasn't a mobile gacha game I'd go there just for the buff ladies 👀

[signal hull]

I- weird to mention that since I just started playing 😳 got my pride charm n everything lol

Yeah I stopped with the gatchas bc I died a a lil bit everytime I missed my husbandos 🤧

[light scroll]

I like BHVR for that, although I wish they'd do more for accessibiity. ANd yes. Mobile gacha is stinky but buff ladies are good civilzation

[orchid flume]

I'm flexing for you!

[tawny knoll]

Thank you for the reminder to go get my charm 😅

[signal hull]

I'd say... What is their stance on LGBTQA+? @harsh knot

[harsh knot]

I really don’t wanna mess up so I’m just making very tiny hints

[signal hull]

Dammit autocorrect 😅

[dry swift]

Charm in... DBD?

[light scroll]

Dead By Daylight has a Pride Flag charm

[tawny knoll]

Yeah!

[signal hull]

Type in PRIDE to coupon in store I think

[orchid flume]

Y'all wanna hear how I met my partner?

[dry swift]

I MUST GO

[harsh knot]

He’s a trans dude, bi, and ace

[signal hull]

Relevant meme

[orchid flume]

Well I'd say it's safe to tell him

[light scroll]

[signal hull]

I'm survivor 🥺🥺🥺

[light scroll]

Dead by Daylight memes can be gold. I can't wait to use my Huntress with the pride charm and use my axes to flirt

[harsh knot]

I know but hgfhgdghngfg scared

[orchid flume]

Valid

[fiery steeple]

I want Ana to pick me up and take me home and lock me to the end of the bed until I freeze and die of starvation

[signal hull]

But yeah, I'd say, if you feel safe, go ahead! Things might get awkward, but they can blow over. I wish you luck!

[tawny knoll]

Perfect flirting technique. My Nea is into it

[orchid flume]

I met my partner because I asked her if her OC could be my OC’s Dad

[signal hull]

I think a huntress let me off for my pride charm once. Was the only one left, and they carried me everywhere 😳

[light scroll]

I even have the new Huntress skin from the CryptTV event

[jade tartan]

Oddly specific:D

[fiery steeple]

I haven't played in ages because the past two rifts have not had any cosmetics that interest me

[dry swift]

Imagine playing more than once every year.

[light scroll]

I've been hard on fortnite because my gay heart demanded I get the Raven skins

[fiery steeple]

that's literally her backstory lmao
she stole adopted kids from villages and locked them inside to keep them safe but her house was not insulated and she didn't feed them

[tawny knoll]

Love this convo, but it should probably head to #🎮other-games-chat 😂

[fiery steeple]

at this point yeah probably

[dry swift]

I'm terrible with horror. 😂 I only ever got DBD because I, for some reason, enjoyed watching it on YT. Anyway, Pride Charm has been acquired

[jade tartan]

Oh! Right. Completely forgot

[signal hull]

I got over the horror of DBD recently, but I'm still bad totally not bc I'm distracted by Pyramid head's abs

[fiery steeple]

I'm a solid okay
I'm good at looping and annoying the killer lmao
got some nonstandard perks that makes me really good at not getting hit during a chase until I can lose them
as long as I've got some vault locations

[orchid flume]

So how my partner and I met...

[signal hull]

I'm curious if you met irl or online? Bc in irl, I'm even more confused how one would approach that conversation 😂

[orchid flume]

Online

She lives in the Philippines

So I have this OC and they’re an undead permanently in their late teens/early 20’s with amnesia and hella daddy issues but they can’t remember why.

Her OC is this necromancer cowboy who also has amnesia so I thought he’d make a good dad for them

Long story short that’s great way to hit it off

[light scroll]

Meanwhile I just met my wife on OK Cupid

[fleet nest]

Happy first day of Pride!!! ❤️

[blissful granite]

Most Days:
Oh someone posted in the #🌈lgbtq channel. That's nice to see a couple messages.

First Day of Pride:
HOLY F 🌈 ING S !!!!

[orchid flume]

One thing I hate about being a lesbian and non-binary artist with gaym nonbinary and trans OC's is people will call you a flavor of phobic if you or your characters don't experience same things as them.

The dumbest comment I've gotten is the fact my main OC uses they/them only is pushing the "harmful stereotype" that all non-binary people use they/them, and instead they should use he/she/it.
Genuinely the idea of calling them those things makes me feel somewhat sick. I use they/them and while she/her is okay but on thin ice I HATE being called he/it.

[graceful geyser]

i-
what gives someone the balls to think they have the right to tell you how to make your oc??

[orchid flume]

People get SO entitled with that stuff.

[fiery steeple]

just shoot back "everyone's identity and experience is different, grow up"

[orchid flume]

Here's what they look like

I have mlm characters, wlw characters, like four non-binary characters one using neo pronouns, a trans guy, and a trans gal.

[blissful granite]

what's trans oc?

original content?

[surreal willow]

Original character

[blissful granite]

ah, thank you.

[dark patio]

Man I should get back to my OCs, but most of my writing these days is fanfic. Plenty of queer headcanons though lol

[blissful granite]

As an artist displaying your content publicly, whether it be drawing or writing or even video game design, there's a level of criticism that you'll always have to endure. Content is typically a part of your personal experience, so when it's subjected to critiques, it can lead to feelings of personal attacks.

The trick to content creation is to separate yourself from it. It takes a lot of patience and a lot of mental exercises. People simply like what they like, interpret it the way they want to interpret it, and go on their way. I'm sure most art gallery buffs have entirely different views from the original artists' intent. It's part of the creative landscape.

When you give a piece of work life, it lives on its own, and is remembered on its own as its own being.

[orchid flume]

Pronouns 👏 are 👏 not 👏 something 👏 you 👏 can 👏 disagree 👏 with 👏

[blissful granite]

You cannot, correct.

[orchid flume]

Criticism I do not mind. But people need to realize if they want something to play exactly to their sensibilities... they can make it themself

[blissful granite]

I mean, do we really know the pronouns of The Mona Lisa?

It's been debated so often that we often lose that to the artist's intent and take this entirely to how people perceive the portrait.

[orchid flume]

It was on a post where I asked people to stop misgendering me and my art because I put it in my bio

My pronouns are (insert pronouns) And the pronouns for this character are (insert pronouns)

[blissful granite]

Have you considered putting the pronouns on the art itself?

In that scenario, the pronouns themselves become part of the art.

[orchid flume]

I usually put them in the post. Someone complained in a post that directly mentioned them that they wanted different pronoun s for my creation. I'm not a millionaire I have no published work, I'm just a 17 year old trying to learn a skill

[waxen hare]

what the heck thats like sayin u cant write or create any characters that arent ur exact gender??

thats so silly im sorry ur goin through that bud

[dark patio]

Sorry they what?????

W H A T

[pure oxide]

I don't know if you've noticed, but people feel very entitled to the work of others.

[waxen hare]

is this on twitter by any chance

[orchid flume]

Yes
They use they/them exclusively But people insist on ignoring it.

[blissful granite]

Hmmm, have you tried DeviantArt?

[shy meteor]

You found your partner by asking her if she would be your dad

[blissful granite]

That community's a little more... nice. Twitter is pretty tough.

[orchid flume]

No...

[dark patio]

I don't think DeviantArt reaches quite as wide an audience as it used to, though

[shy meteor]

sorry sorry don't take me serious haha

[orchid flume]

Nah I get it! it's funny

[blissful granite]

Oh no, did DeviantArt lose its appeal? That's unfortunate. 😦 I used to love scrolling through art in there.

[dark patio]

aw did i miss the "how we found our partners" talk

[orchid flume]

The fact we still have to keep up the Dad/kid thing when RPing is very weird

We don't mind it too much since we know they're our characters and not us.

[shy meteor]

this is true
My sister has always gotten messages from people asking for free art and it hasn't gotten better with her getting more popular haha..

[dark patio]

I think a lot of art has moved over to instagram and twitter. I still see DeviantArt used, but not nearly as much as I used to

[waxen hare]

yeah i think da changed its terms of service and it rly shoved the artists under the bus iirc

[blissful granite]

ouch

[waxen hare]

there was some controversy about somethin

[shy meteor]

All I remember from DA is that there were a lot of tracers going around and nothing was being done even though it was literally theft

[dark patio]

Tumblr was also pretty good for art for a while, and had a lot of really talented artists, but ended up getting pretty shitty

[blissful granite]

Copyrighting artwork is a pain online.

[orchid flume]

I hate to be that person but Tumblr... was never peak reputation

[waxen hare]

im still mad at tumblr blockin the lgbtq+ tags in their nsfw ban regardless of their sfw-ness and then bein like haha were so inclusive!!

[shy meteor]

I think Tumblr died because they changed their policy about lewd content

[dark patio]

Exactly this

[blissful granite]

Tumblr was hosting like straight-up porn so I can understand the fall of it.

[waxen hare]

yet they do nothin about the nsfw bots that still plague the site 😭

[dark patio]

That was what happened that really ruined it. I used to follow some really good artists on tumblr, and I still follow some of them, but some of them just sort of trickled off

[shy meteor]

The issue about the ||porn|| has mostly to do with underage kids being able to access it without any barriers

[dark patio]

Also let's avoid a conversation about sex work and social media please.

[shy meteor]

but banning the LGBTQ+ tags all together made no sense

oh, right, sorry sorry!

[dark patio]

It's okay! It wasn't just to you it was just in general!

[wicked jungle]

wait, what, lgbt tags were/are getting banned? o.o

[orchid flume]

My partner's got a decent following

Fun fact, I was a youtuber subscriber, met her, became really good friends then like a week before we got together I realized she was that youtuber

[blissful granite]

Are you planning to go to college for art?

[shy meteor]

they do art, too, right? I'd like to see if I'm allowed pwp

[dark patio]

It's not a bad conversation to have, and I think it's important to have discussions like that at times, but we're a PG server 😅

[orchid flume]

No

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/621145431669211218/846790878072274994/ezgif.com-gif-maker_3.gif

Here's a gif she made last week (her art obvs)

[shy meteor]

oh wow that looks so cool!

[dark patio]

That does look really cool!

[orchid flume]

My OC's Dads :)

[blissful granite]

My brother went to college for art. His work went from good to phenomenal. I've featured his artwork in several LGBTQIA+ communities.

[orchid flume]

I'll link her twitter in a sec. My partner is already a professional and I only learned art so I could talk to her

[dark patio]

If the conversation is going to lean heavier into art, though, we should move it to #🎨arts-and-crafts

[shy meteor]

I wish I could do art

[orchid flume]

I'll link her socials in arts and crafts

[wicked jungle]

you are doing art

[orchid flume]

You are

[wicked jungle]

i have three little art-bubs on my table as evidence

[dark patio]

Guys.

[blissful granite]

Topic change. 🙂

[dark patio]

Thank you ❤️

So there was conversation earlier about how folks met partners?

[blissful granite]

I've met all of mine on dating apps. Usually they last a few years. OKCupid has some rough folk in my area who are 100% committed to marrying you before they meet you. POF is a bit more cool. Plus there's lgbt apps.

[orchid flume]

Yep! I met my first one since we both modded a big server, and my current one because I asked if her character could be mines Dad.

[dark patio]

I met the past few on dating apps, but my current boyfriend I met because of Deadpool 2 XD

[blissful granite]

https://tenor.com/view/heart-i-love-you-ily-love-wade-wilson-gif-11696862

I may or may not have an obsession with Deadpool.

[orchid flume]

That's AWESOME!

[dark patio]

We were both in the RP community on tumblr, both playing Deadpool, and we had mutual friends who were playing NTW, Yukio, and Sugar Bear Peter. They started a private rp/hang out server, but everyone could only play one character and they already had a third, different Deadpool writer in mind for the server Deadpool.

[blissful granite]

Ryan Reynolds is really trying to push for the pansexual aspect in Deadpool 3, but it's Disney, and Disney loves to bury lgbtq community, so,

[dark patio]

So I came in as Wolverine, and he came in as Gambit, and we just... hit it off

[orchid flume]

So my partner has this OC who you see above who's a cowboy necromancer.

[blissful granite]

Gambit ❤️ 💟 ♥️

[dark patio]

Our first Christmas, before we were technically together, he bought me replica Wolverine dog tags, and I bought him playing cards

[orchid flume]

I have an OC who's this undead with no memory at all, but really needed an adult in their life to help them see their own worth and learn the importance of family. And I thought he would be the perfect candidate

[blissful granite]

https://tenor.com/view/zootopia-officer-clawhauser-so-cute-aww-leopard-gif-12813872

[orchid flume]

Awww

[blissful granite]

I love the Marvel universe. That's adorbs.

[dark patio]

I wear my dog tags every day now

[orchid flume]

Me and my partner stayed up all night on new years eve watching the Legend of Korra

[blissful granite]

See now I need to see a photo.

[wicked jungle]

i remember there was a german website for lgbt youth, that's how i found my first ever gf

it used to be a very weird time of meeting strangers in random german chatrooms without supervision

i guess i was too young to be scared of p³dos or even know wtf they were

[orchid flume]

My partner accidentally stood me up on Christmas eve so that's one was to start Christmas. "Merry chris- I was waiting for FOUR hours." Kinda funny in hindsight

[blissful granite]

Hooooooogurrrrrrl, we're talking my generation now. 😄

[blissful granite]

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE love

[dark patio]

oof, but that is the perfect sort of story to laugh about later

[blissful granite]

I gotta get back to work. But yeah I met my first partner on those shady random chatrooms, back in the days where internet was through a 33.6k dial-up modem and no lgbtq resources, and everyone found each other either through AOL chat or gay.com

[dark patio]

My boyfriend also drew me matching Wolverine and Sabretooth art for my birthday, I'll have to share that in the art chat at some point

[wicked jungle]

omg gay.com

[blissful granite]

RIGHT? memorieeeeeeeeeeeees.

Microsoft bought them out for some reason and it's a ghost town now.

[dark patio]

Sometimes it's shocking to me how far we've come.

[pure oxide]

I met my husband on OKCupid and then moved to Germany to live with him less than a year later. XD

[wicked jungle]

but yeah have fun at work

[dark patio]

In a good way, of course, but wow

[wicked jungle]

the times of meeting people online before discord or snapchat or whatever else gets used nowadays used to be so crazy

[blissful granite]

Yep, shady bars or shady websites, welcome to queer life in the 90s 😄

[wicked jungle]

i can still remember skype-calling with complete strangers simply because they were lgbt

totally wouldnt advise to do that anymore tho, it's scary af on discord alone from what i've seen 😂

[blissful granite]

With a 33.6k dial-up modem, it would literally take you one full hour to download a 3MB song.

[wicked jungle]

hahaha

[orchid flume]

I was on an RP server for lgbt teens and young adults

[wicked jungle]

man the memories of having a whole box of burned cds and downloading movies/songs for weeks on end oml

[orchid flume]

RIP that server, it's gone to the big discord community in the sky

[blissful granite]

Stop I'm dying from laughter 🤣 I knew a gay guy who actually had a party for celebrating downloading his 1000th song and people actually partied IRL over it.

[wicked jungle]

when i believe "i kissed a girl" came out, i snuck out of my room at night to record the song from the TV headphones onto my flipphone?
i know that aint that ancient but man those were some times

[orchid flume]

jhygkijhlk;

[wicked jungle]

how did i never guess that might have a reason 😂

[wicked jungle]

happy to make you laugh 😄 (i still have one of those CD towers with burned cds in my room oml)

[blissful granite]

I think his screenname was asmokingfool. omg we used to laugh about how he'd go through a pack of cigarettes for every song he downloaded.

i totally should've started work 10 minutes ago but I'm having too much fun reminiscing about the old world of queer life.

[orchid flume]

I knew since middle school I wasn't straight.

[blissful granite]

my third or fourth bf, i set up his MySpace account because I learned how to code HTML 1.0

[orchid flume]

Some girl: Touches my hand.
Me: "Welp, I'm clearly not straight..."

[blissful granite]

Do you have anything to even play those CDs any more? Most laptops and computers stopped including DVD drives back like 7 years ago. 🤣

[wicked jungle]

i still have a working CD and Cassette player 😂

she went through alot but she is still going strong 🤣

[blissful granite]

https://tenor.com/view/rupaul-shade-brooke-lynn-hytes-drag-race-drag-queen-gif-13917258

[orchid flume]

I bought my partner a Nintendo switch for Christmas, for a few days afterwards she was super quiet. Then I find out she's been playing Pokemon for like 10 hours a day gfsdghfgjhghkjhj

[wicked jungle]

i havent seen a music cassette in ages tho o-o only audio books on cassettes

[pure oxide]

I have a DVD burner on my computer

[blissful granite]

They brought back record players for some reason. But tbh I'll listen to Donna Summers on vinyl any day

[pure oxide]

and a multi-card reader that includes -Picture, CFI, M2, and SDXC/SDHC cards.

[wicked jungle]

omg yeah i have seen listings on etsy with cassettes of TV shows just as room-lights

[rocky merlin]

My car has a cd player and I'll never part with it ya hear Apparently it's an option to have it in new cars now 😭

[blissful granite]

Say whaaaaaaaaaaaa? What company?

[pure oxide]

granted, my computer is 7 years old at this point? XD

Oh, I built it myself.

[wicked jungle]

maybe i should get one rainbow one 🤔

[blissful granite]

OH THAT DOESN'T COUNT. lolololol

[pure oxide]

But I mean, it's an LG, there's a regular blueray player, and a blueray/dvd writer. 😛

[blissful granite]

It is nice that the blurays are still SATA ports since those will last forever.

[pure oxide]

I mean, we should probably move this to #💬general lol

[wicked jungle]

"what company" you ask, they were just shadily called "something cd burner something" 😂

wasnt one even something with cute or xp?

[blissful granite]

I miss the days of the 90s gay culture. It was its own thing and corporate greed didn't take it by the helm and transform it into a marketing tool.

[orchid flume]

As a Floridian it's somewhat worth it to see the karens melt down over it

[blissful granite]

Drag queens were authentic liberators, cosmetics were a day-long search to buy gorgeous colors, everything was made from scratch, there wasn't anyone telling us who our role models were, our experiences were our own and we had a unique identity for every city.

[orchid flume]

One hella unpopular opinion I have id Disney does not deserve praise for Owl House. They're notorious in how they refuse to put gay stuff in unless they get brownie points

[mental shard]

at least target threw up the rainbow all over some merchandise

[blissful granite]

Target is a lot more accepting than, say, Walmart.

[orchid flume]

All my homies hate walmart

[blissful granite]

They are still a corporate overlord selling rainbow frisbees as plates (true story, look at their plates)

[mental shard]

LOL

was unaware of that

[blissful granite]

I picked up my plates at Target and I thought, "these look like frisbees" and then I went home and got "they look like frisbees"

I have a better time buying pride stuff on Amazon, and Jeff Bezos is even worse, but at least its authentic pride stuff.

[mental shard]

but how do we know if it's gay if it's not rainbow 😦

[orchid flume]

I got a very out dated lesbian flag pin but it was the only one at hot topic

The hot topic Cashier whispering: "Would you like that pride pin?"
Me: "WHY YES I WOULD LIKE THAT PIN WITH THE LESBIAN FLAG ON IT THANK YOU FOR ASKING!"

[dark patio]

aw frog

[light scroll]

[brazen willow]

happy gay month yall

[supple brook]

I mean there very much are intersex people who identify as cis

[orchid flume]

Very true

[iron island]

wait a minute im late but that froggy pin is so cute

[dry swift]

My friends and I had a conversation about this earlier today, actually

Or rather, a conversation about how the basics of the definition of intersex work

[gloomy tendon]

Happy pride month!

To start this month right I am finally putting my summer tires on my car! So I can be gay and driving lol

[wicked jungle]

frooog ;O;
you can just randomly buy pride pins in normal shops? o.o

if anybody knows really great small/subtle pride pins, please let a sad pin-less lgbt lad know ;o;

[sick zinc]

you can just pretend it's the new flag by flipping the frog over

because the old flag was abandoned after people found out the maker was a racist terf lol

[wicked jungle]

that's the new one, right?

[sick zinc]

yes

[wicked jungle]

oh true the deeper umbra orange can be looked at like the right orange

kinda sad tho

[sick zinc]

there was also the expanded one, i forgot what this was for
https://64.media.tumblr.com/d489169591ed5908e55a300459a09ae5/tumblr_puegmi4o7l1udyeayo1_500.png

(bonus magical girl)

[wicked jungle]

https://www.horniman.ac.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/new-lesbian-flag-emily-gwen.jpg this?

[sick zinc]

ye

[wicked jungle]

apparently the maker worked with trans lesbians in the creation of this ;w; that makes me happy

[iron escarp]

:) that is nice if its true

[orchid flume]

Yeah :)

[blissful granite]

It can be challenging keeping up with the flags. There's been several modifications over recent years.

Most searches will not come up with the black and brown aspects of each of the flags, for example. Whether or not this has been officially accepted as the new flag or not is a challenging discussion.

This, for example.

^ That's the updated lesbian flag representing the BIPOC communities.

I like this flag the most, it's made a valiant effort to represent as many people as possible with very limited space.

[dull axle]

I would 100% hang that outside my house, if I owned a house.

[orchid flume]

That flag does remove butch lesbians tho

[blissful granite]

Hence where the importance of inclusion is always a factor, and the flags will always be changing.

[indigo sand]

happy gay yall 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

[orchid flume]

Happy pride!

[supple brook]

Happy birthday to every single queer person!

[wicked jungle]

i got??? a non-binary meme from my former best friend???

i am so confused

[harsh knot]

Pride time ye

[pure oasis]

Happy Pride! <3

[wide hare]

Happy pride y'all! If you're out, amazing! If you're still closeted, you're valid too! Celebrate in your own private way, if you can ❤️

[bleak lodge]

HAPPY PRIDE!!!!!!!!

🏳️‍⚧️

[hidden inlet]

happy pride 🌈 🏳️‍🌈 🌤️ 🌴

[proud pelican]

Here's a link to share with friends and allies who want to support someone during pride month!
https://emilygwen.carrd.co/

[civic shadow]

These two beautiful women are engaged and the pink haired lady was showing off her pride outfits to her fiance. It was very wholesome and she had some.pretty amazing outfits! 😍

[orchid flume]

Good morning all you lovely folks!

[pearl sleet]

me trying to explain to my therapist that being uncomfortable with your current gender is not the same thing as women wanting to work in the workplace

and yes that was actually part of our conversation during therapy today 😩

i say today
but yesterday
today is when i wake up to when i go to bed

[orchid flume]

I’m sorry :(

[pearl sleet]

yeah it was sucky

but i have snorlax emotes so im okay

[orchid flume]

I know it doesn’t do much, but I totally get what you’re going through

[pearl sleet]

oh im totally comfortable with being nb
i just had to explain to her that there is a huge difference between gender dysphoria (is that the right term?) and women wanting to work in the workplace in things other than what they were 'supposed' to work in at the time

and thank you i appreciate the kind words

[pure oxide]

..... how the fuck old is your therapist, if you don't mind my asking?

[oak scarab]

heck yeah

[arctic crypt]

Do u guys believe in jesus christ?

[supple brook]

Why?

[pure oxide]

That's a pretty personal question, and not really a discussion to have on this server. 🙂

[iron escarp]

i agree, personal beliefs are all fine and good but as your tone is unreadable it comes across in a manner that might be less than respectful to other beliefs(simply because how often it is phrased in such a manner to those that might fall outside the christian faith)

[orchid flume]

Good morning gaymers!

[orchid flume]

That’s not something I want to talk about, especially in an LGBT safe space of all placed

[iron escarp]

good afternoon!

[sterile tusk]

Happy pride month y'all

[flint dagger]

Nope.

[flint dagger]

I'm sorry to assume, but are you Indonesian?

[balmy zodiac]

A mod shut down that conversation before it began, it might be wise not to engage in it any further!

anyway happy pride month everyone :) do any of yall have any plans of going to a pride parade?

i won't be able to because i'll be working that day unforch but i'm looking forward to my friends enjoying the hell out of it 🥰

[iron escarp]

i mean going to a pride parade here would be unwise considering the covid situation

plus im not entirely sure if we have pride in my country in june(ive never gone to any pride related events here so i wouldnt know myself)

[gloomy tendon]

i'm pretty sure the closest pride parade to where i live is in august

[orchid flume]

I can’t since my parents would disown me

[harsh knot]

Same

And it would be very dangerous for me because of where I live

[orchid flume]

Same, Florida sucks

[iron escarp]

i mean if my parents saw me at pride they would probably also(like if i was filmed and got on tv/select social media)

[iron escarp]

i dont know its a topic the server wants to get into but i have no idea whats going on? like there's apparently been a change in the pan pride flag and nobody can be cohesive as to what the reasoning is for abandoning the pink/yellow/blue one?

the new one having like muted versions of a blue/green and a yellow and a on orange/red kinda colour

[worn pecan]

Can you show it? :0 I haven't seen a change

[iron escarp]

this is supposedly the new one, with another alternative one proposed with more shades

but because i've seen all kinds of people list a lot of different reasons why(almost all widely varying) im not sure if to trust it or not

[worn pecan]

Hmm.. I would say until you have a definite answer, stick to the flag you're used to or comfortable with using! c: It's about your comfort, not controversy. I'm sure things will simmer down and there will be a proper answer.

[signal hull]

Pan flag uses Pantone colors?

And are primary colors? The original*

[iron escarp]

That's true, this is the 'newly proposed' flag

Because apparently the creator did something but nobody has the same story

[radiant tundra]

The agreed upon ‘story’ is that they wanna change the flag (mostly they as in not actual Pan people) bc the original creator of the Pan flag (pink, yellow, blue) is not an exclusionist (specifically of bi/pan lesbians)

Or at least that’s what was going around last year, who knows if there is something new this year

[iron escarp]

I've more generally seen it being passed off as the creator being lesbophobic

Or more scalding accusations of some sort

[dark patio]

The creator supports bi/pan lesbians, which is likely where that claim is coming from, from exclusionists

[radiant tundra]

Exclusionists yay /s

[iron escarp]

I mean honestly considering how much discourse gets revived yearly around pride time that's just what I thought it could be as well

Like I've seen some shit going on today and honestly, why do some people have to be so loud and horrid

[supple brook]

Some people are just terminally online

And don't actually interact with real queer spaces outside of the internet

[dark patio]

I'd say just keep on using the pan flag if it makes you happy, and if you want to use a different flag, just make sure you take a look at who are spreading it around/what it represents if you don't want to be accidentally exclusionist/transphobic

[iron escarp]

I'm just scared like I already feel so alienated from so much of the community at large, and the stuff i come across isn't helping

[dark patio]

the pan community or the wider queer community?

[iron escarp]

Sometimes I wish I could distance myself from the community almost in its entirery because of it

[brazen willow]

what does bi/pan lesbians mean?

[iron escarp]

The wider queer community

[brazen willow]

sorry if this comes off as really dumb of me ive just never heard it before

[dark patio]

I don't identify as pan myself rn, but I used to, and lemme tell you that you belong right here.

[waxen hare]

the seeming increase in gatekeeping rly hurts my heart 😭

but im hopin its just twitter being twitter and itll stop soon

[valid timber]

Female identifying people dating female identifying people, yet identifying as bi/pan sexual

[iron escarp]

Like I use what can be seen as 'microlabels' asexuality is generally excluded as a whole to begin with, and I can still see the effects of a push against nonbinary people that also use the term trans to identify themselves

[frigid vine]

Lol I just take it as a compliment when ppl are being douche bags like that. Not everyone in the world is gonna be nice and like you/me. That sorta deal. So when I find the ones who vibe with me, makes them all that more special.

[iron escarp]

It's not just twitter though, I've seen it in almost all online spaces I'm a part of aside from discord

[frigid vine]

Find the ones who vibe with you, and say be gone to the ones who dont. They ain’t worth the energy expended on caring about their opinion.

[iron escarp]

I wish I could ignore or deflect people that simply, I'm a very fragile and sensitive person at heart so every blow just hits so much harder and makes me so much more angry and sad

[radiant tundra]

Thank you for explaining it. I wasn’t sure exactly how to word it despite being the one to bring it up in the first place

[dark patio]

I can't say much about the bi/pan lesbian discourse, and frankly I don't want to. It's not my place. But I can say that I use a lot of labels for myself, and finding labels that make YOU feel good doesn't hurt anyone else. If someone calling themselves a bi/pan lesbian makes them feel comfortable in their skin, who are we to judge.

[frigid vine]

It’s okay. I am sensitive too, but I’ve had a long time of being shoved down for just being myself. It still smarts at first, but then I talk myself into a better feeling place about it.

[waxen hare]

sexuality is fluid and tryin to create exact parameters in which u can use labels and gatekeeping them aggressively is gonna do nothing except cause unneeded grief i hope the internet wises up soon 😭

[radiant tundra]

Also @brazen willow I do not think it was dumb of you at all to ask about bi/pan lesbians given that you are unfamiliar with what it means. You did not need to apologize

[brazen willow]

i personally havent seen it in years other then people meantioning it on discord but to be fair my last online activity involving the lgbtq community (before 2020) was during the last lesbian flag and @valid timber ty for explaining

[brazen willow]

im just always worried ill come off as a uh whats the right word to use

im worried id come off as bigoted

[frigid vine]

Trying to educate yourself on something isn’t bigoted 🙂

[radiant tundra]

I understand, language is so fluid and the queer community is developing new language all the time. Still, I don’t think it is wrong to ask because you were very nice, and it’s clear that you weren’t trying to judge, just familiarize yourself with new terms.

[brazen willow]

ikik its just happened before where my lack of knowledge got me treated badly basically

[radiant tundra]

I’m so sorry that that happened to you

[frigid vine]

That’s unfortunate. Sounds more like a ‘them’ problem, than a you problem bth.

[brazen willow]

im not gonna contiune this since i dont wanna think about it anymore but thanks for the comfort! edit: bit felt like a weird word choice for me lol

[frigid vine]

❤️

[iron escarp]

im honestly considering disengaging with every online lgbtq+ space aside from this one, its genuinely so tiring sometimes

like its supposed to be pride and everyone is fighting and being exclusionists and sometimes saying the most horrible things and i just cant deal with it

[frigid vine]

If it isn’t uplifting you, then sometimes taking that step back is the healthiest thing.

[iron escarp]

i mean i dont think 'uplifting' is the right word choice here

[dark patio]

If it doesn’t spark joy

look, you don’t HAVE to engage with the community to still be part of the community

[iron escarp]

simply because i dont think it has ever been? like especially around my asexuality.

[dark patio]

Engage on your own terms, do what makes you feel safe and happy.

[iron escarp]

in other spaces outside of this one i constantly felt like i was inbetween a rock and a hard place

like i'm not welcome in straight/cis communities but i certaintly almost never felt welcome in lgbtq+ places

i just on the other hand feel like disengaging with the lgbtq+ community almost as a whole will have a severe negative impact on my activism

[radiant tundra]

I honestly wish that the ace community had not been so destroyed by exclusionists…

[iron escarp]

in terms of staying up to date with the few things that do matter (inbetween all the needless and horrid squabbeling)

i feel like giving up on the community is a disservice for those who fought for it and our rights in the past

[frigid vine]

You can’t help others if you don’t first help yourself.

[dark patio]

You don’t have to do anything. If you want to, great, but only if it’s something that’s good for you. You gotta take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else, and sometimes that means taking a step back to recharge so you can be better when you can return

[frigid vine]

By existing authentically, happily, is some of the best things you can do for yourself AND others. It gives other ppl permission to do the same.

[iron escarp]

that is quite a lot easier said than done unfortunately, but i am appreciative of the sentiment

[rigid burrow]

It doesn't make you any less apart of a community just because you don't interact with it. You are still who you are whatever others say.

[frigid vine]

It only feels hard. Promise 🙂
I haven’t been apart of the community like ever. XD

For those reasons you’ve been stating you don’t like.

But I still consider myself in it BC I’m not Cis/het lol. I just find people who vibe with me and am happy doing that. If the information is only a source of pain, then I leave it at the door.

[iron escarp]

i mean its just, inwardly accepting my identity as asexual especially is made difficult not only by the experiences i've had, but also because of how it is viewed in the public eye in general, regardless if thats from a queer or a straight lens

my nonbinary/trans identity is a lot easier to accept and to find myself in

like when i heard abt other trans people, like them sharing their experiences it eventually just clicked and now im on a waiting list for a gender clinic

[frigid vine]

That’s okay. Your feelings are valid. Past experiences don’t need to be your future though. You’re allowed to be yourself, however that means for you.

[iron escarp]

i mean they wont be, because i will most likely not consider dating again, at least for a very long time, in fear of repeating the same cycle i've already experienced before

just because i am 'allowed' in some way doesnt mean i cant harbor hatred for my own identity for what situations i've been put in partially because of it

[orchid flume]

I'm non binary but I HATE being called trans

[iron escarp]

that is the pain asexuality carries with it for me, it has no benefits to me other than knowing im not some sort monster

[iron escarp]

i personally dont mind it, but i can understand why you might be uncomfortable being called that(as a fellow nonbinary person)

[frigid vine]

It’s okay to take a step back from things to allow those emotions to subside for you. However that needs to be done for you, BC it’s your life and your experiences. But coming at things from fear does nothing beneficial for you or anyone else involved. So, do what you have to. If you feel you need take that time for you, recover for your experiences, then have at it. It’s your life. Not liking aspects of ourselves is the pieces that cause the most anguish in our lives. I totally get it. It feels like it’s so hard to overcome. It’s heavy and raw. But it is possible.

[orchid flume]

I think non-binary people who use the label are valid as hell but I don't want to be called trans. One time someone called me transphobic for not wanting to use the label. Here's how it is for me, I use my birth name, I'm not super dysphoric if people use my agab's default pronouns, and masculinity makes me far more dysphoric than femininity so because of that I don't really view myself as trans

[frigid vine]

It’s not Transphobic to have a desire of being perceived the way we see ourselves.

[orchid flume]

You DON'T need dysphoria to be trans of course I'm not implying that

[frigid vine]

It’s not anyone else’s job to label you.

[orchid flume]

But because being trans masc would make me far more dysphoric than how I currently am I don't like the label.

[iron escarp]

that is a very rude and not cool person >:( its not on them to give you a label and try to force it on you

[frigid vine]

Lol if I come off strong, I apologize. I’m pretty to the point and sometimes that sounds harsh xD

[orchid flume]

People are just gatekeepy and tribalistic by nature. I understand where they come from, but at the end of the day live and let live.

[frigid vine]

Exactly!

They don’t have to live my life. They haven’t lived my life up until this point and they never will. We can have shared experiences, but that’s it. It’s my job to find ways to make myself happy. If someone else doesn’t like what I’ve chosen for myself? TS. XD

[orchid flume]

Exactly

[frigid vine]

It still can smart when someone’s a jerk. But again, not their life. And I can easily walk away. Lol nobody is holding me hostage to staying around ppl who aren’t good for me.

[tight robin]

You know after struggling with my identity for so long, it's so nice to find other ace peeps in all the spaces I go to ^-^

[frigid vine]

❤️

That’s the part of community I like. And I’m glad to see it ❤️

[iron escarp]

yeah! its like a breath of fresh air

[wicked jungle]

i came out as nb ace to a friend today
they told me that it's ok and that i am not a "fake" or worthy less of love and respect

so yeah, there are people irl who care for you and i as well it's getting better

[tight robin]

💜

[orchid flume]

This is why me and my partner can't go on dates.

Her at 2AM: "Wanna go on a date tomorrow."
Me: "I thought you'd never ask."
Me a few minutes ago: "So, when are we gonna have that date tomorrow?"
Her: "It was today, you already missed it."

God, we had to schedule tomorrows attempt, and it involves me waking up at 2AM'

[iron island]

honestly i'm so confused what i am that ive kind of stuck with "ace-spec bi/pan romantic" and "idc gender" and not thought about it since

also ik you have to wake up at 2am for that but please try to get sleep omg

[orchid flume]

I have a weird sleep schedule

[worn pecan]

I have a question. Is identifying as demi-bi an actual thing or do they contradict each other? I just want to know because I feel like I want to identify that way but I don't know if it's an identity if that makes sense.

[vast jacinth]

nah, it makes sense more or less. I always think it's kind of odd to identify bi over pan to an extent the more you identify aro/ace since gender is likely less of an issue to you the less important sex is, but there are even obvious exceptions there regarding cultural expectations based on gender expressions apart from those wants

[valid solar]

Definitely a thing. I know a lot of people who identify that way. Usually using the split attraction model

[orchid flume]

My partner is demibi

Demiromantic bisexual (also biromantic.)

[iron escarp]

i mean which one of the multi-gender attraction romantic/sexual identity identifiers you use can be very significant to the user, so saying its kind of odd to identify as bi over pan doesnt really make sense to me

like as as somebody that identifies as panromantic ace, i completely understand that the differences between these labels is minor in theory, but for the people that might use these labels for themselves it's more important

[supple brook]

Kinda adds to the stigma that one is inherently more valid/better than the other to word it that way imo

[vast jacinth]

I just mean they're similar, & the distinction is basically just in whether gender plays a role in your preferences, right?

[orchid flume]

Not really

[iron escarp]

i mean bi doesnt always mean attracted to all genders though? there's a reason why there's distinction in label

[valid solar]

It differs depending on the user and thats fine

[orchid flume]

My partner uses both bi and pan, but she has a preference for men. She just wouldn't let it influence her decision on who to date

[iron escarp]

and even if it does to them? perhaps they're more comfortable using it because its more widely used in general?

[orchid flume]

Can confirm since she's dating me, a lesbian

[worn pecan]

Thank yall for the help :> Helps me feel a lot better!

[valid solar]

You know that meme thats like, bi pan and omni, they overlap but the distinction matters to some people and thats okay. I like that

[iron escarp]

like i wouldnt mind labeling myself as omni/bi but i prefer pan because i connected more to the label personally, and i dont see why others shouldnt get to do the same

[orchid flume]

You demi bi's are valid as valid can be!

[bleak lodge]

I'm panromantic, omnisexual.

It just works for me.

[wicked jungle]

demi bees 👀

[valid solar]

When I was younger I indentified as demisexual biromantic, and I just chose bi cause the word felt more fitting than other words

[iron escarp]

thats great! using different labels to make distinctions in how you feel abt your identity is valid!

[valid solar]

Sometimes it's not about meaning but just how you feel and thats also okay

[worn pecan]

Demi bees 🥺

[orchid flume]

I personally don't use microlabels.
I'm non-binary, I'm not agender or any flavor of xenogender, I am simply enby.

[wicked jungle]

i used to hella misunderstand bi vs pan, but even as i've learned about them i still identify more with the term "pan" itself

[valid solar]

Microlabels helped me sooo much when I was younger, and I dont use them anymore but im glad i did

[wicked jungle]

i have a friend who identifies with bi despite feeling the same, just being "pan" doesnt speak to her like being bi does

[iron escarp]

microlabels really help me as an autistic person to have a really clear view of the identities im part of

[orchid flume]

I am also autistic

[iron escarp]

i havent found the right labels for everything yet but thats fine

[orchid flume]

You're all hella valid, I just personally don't use them for myself

[supple brook]

Seriously, people put so much weight on why you use certain labels and "here's a checklist if you don't check all of them you're this and not that" and it's so WEIRD to me

[valid solar]

YES !! Exactly

[wicked jungle]

yeah, and here it's just "you identify with it, go for it"

[supple brook]

I used to id as pan but I just started liking bi more and legit, I just liked the flag more 😂 it's not always that deep

[iron escarp]

its just gatekeeping/exclusionism under a thinly veiled blanket of 'being helpful' or whatever

[valid solar]

I identify as lesbian now and idk that another label will ever fit me more but theres always so many people telling everyone theyre not lesbian and its so annoying loll

[supple brook]

For some people it is and that's lovely! But putting so much weight and pressure on it for everyone is so strange man if something feels right to you for whatever reason ho for it

[orchid flume]

People who tell me I'm not a lesbian cause I'm NB can leave

[wicked jungle]

you dont need a degree in gender studies to find something that makes you comfortable and that speaks out to you ._.

[iron escarp]

or like the opposite where there's pressure to immediately label yourself in every way as soon as you realize you're part of the lgbtq+ community

[orchid flume]

(None of y'all, but I hear it.)

[wicked jungle]

the biggest sigh left my lungs when i reread the convo about the pan flag being "cancelled" again because the creator isnt against bi/pan lesbians and i'm????????

punishing somebody for being more inclusive sounds so fucking stupid yet it gets done over and over again

[iron escarp]

:( do i need to slap somebody for u
i hate it when nonbinary people are excluded from lesbian/gay spaces bc "NB PEOPLE ARENT MEN/WOMEN" or whatever

[iron escarp]

fr tho, i'm kinda glad you saw it though because we can like share the anger as a community

[orchid flume]

A mod I'm on the server, they say I'm taking the term from actual lesbians

[vast jacinth]

that & a label shouldn't be defined by its creator. language is defined by how it is understood when communicated.

[iron escarp]

well that mod is wrong, all non-men should be able to identify with the term lesbian? if they feel thats the right label for them

[orchid flume]

the weird part is, the mod is also non binary and only attracted to women before they came out as enby. Now they use the term gay for their women attraction

[wicked jungle]

yeah i even went on one of my fave pan education twitters and they posted three times that the pink-yellow-cyan flag is right and the creator has done nothing wrong as it was said and under it people were so disgustingly gatekeeping ;-;

[dark patio]

okay i know i kinda missed the conversation BUT i wanna hop in real quick with a distinction between bi and pan that both a) helped me, and b) is just kinda a fun way to think about it

[iron escarp]

like istg if i see another person telling ppl to use trixic or other nblm/nblw exclusive terms i will not be having it

[orchid flume]

You're super valid and I'm happy for yah!

[wicked jungle]

i mean doesnt gay just basically mean attraction to people who dont have the same gender as you anyways? ._.

[orchid flume]

I strongly dislike using those terms for myself or my characters

[wicked jungle]

i hate it when gay gets reduced to mlm nowadays

[orchid flume]

I know, it makes no sense

[wicked jungle]

big sigh bubbling up

[iron escarp]

like nonbinary isnt a third gender?

[orchid flume]

it took me years to get comfortable with the term lesbian

[wicked jungle]

it's an umbrella term for everything outside/between of binary you're right

it's just hard to explain that while being very strongly leaning on the agender spectrum of nb personally and just thinking "no thanks" when presented with w or m haha

[dark patio]

(not saying this is the only way to think about it, or that you have to use this definition, use whatever label you want, this just was helpful for me)
Bi is kind of when attraction to different genders feels different, and pan is when attraction feels the same regardless of gender. Both are for multiple genders, but like, maybe looking at an NB person who falls into your type feels like mmm and looking at a man who falls into your type is like aaaa which is why I lean towards the bi label (and also because i like the colors lol)

[vast jacinth]

that's how I think of it, but I guess how the prevailing culture knows or doesn't know a term like pan is an important factor

[wicked jungle]

i need some sorta education on aesthetic attraction vs general attraction now, man my head hurts

[dark patio]

I identified as pan for a really long time, but I kinda drifted towards bi for the colors just cause it felt more suited to me.

[iron escarp]

i mean to me my panromatic identity just means being romantically attracted to people regardless of their gender? like this also includes stuff like presentation for me?
plus i dont actually ever date people without knowing them and their personality first(or at least thats how its been so far, though i doubt it'll ever change since dating apps werent really meant for aces and in most cases, nonbinary people too, like by design)

[dark patio]

Oh man aesthetic vs general attraction is hard, I'm demi on top of everything else so it's kind of a whole pile of ????

[wicked jungle]

exactly

[iron escarp]

choosing your multi-gender sexual/romantic identity based on knowing how it works: wack
choosing your multi-gender sexual/romantic identity based on the colours of the flag 👉 👉
/j

[wicked jungle]

it's hard to be more interested in aesthetic than sexual attraction compared to my friends, as well cause i need to turn down that crushing-slider

[iron escarp]

aesthetic attraction is the biggest factor of ?????????????????????????????? in my life

[wicked jungle]

like on one hand i so dont have a gender preference but man my aesthetic attraction is WEIRD

[iron escarp]

how does it work? how do i distinguish it from anything else??? no idea??? am i just sex repulsed and do experience sexual attracttion and i've just been reading it all as aesthetic???? WHO KNOWS

[wicked jungle]

i only know that i cant really feel that "step on me" things when seeing sexy dances or such

i just dont feel that and it's honestly kinda gross to me if i think too far into it

[iron escarp]

like i just look at another person with coloured hair: THEY LOOK SO COOL AND I LOVE THAT
my brain: hmmm lets psychoanalye this feeling to figure out what the heck is going on

[wicked jungle]

cause like, hyolyn is aesthetically EXTREMELY pretty and VERY good at dancing but i dont want anything... ugh

[iron escarp]

Haha autism brain go: confuse signals

[valid solar]

AHDHSJD HYOLYN

[iron escarp]

i dont think i wanna know who that is

[valid solar]

Shes v great performer

[wicked jungle]

it feels like my whole brain has one council that decides over what some things could mean and none of the councilmembers like each other

[wicked jungle]

HELLO THERE; DALLY BIG YES????

[valid solar]

GIANT YES

[iron escarp]

THE COUNCIL DECIDES THE FATE: AESTHETIC ATTRACTION OR SOEMTHING ELSE

and they never come up with an answer, its always a tie or undecided

[wicked jungle]

idk why but songs like Dally or Mino's Body just really get the powered up house-wife out of me lmaooooooo

[valid solar]

LMFAOO

[iron escarp]

what is that even supposed to mean angel???

tradwife angel? /j

[wicked jungle]

idk why but i cant listen to stuff like lofi or rock to get me going to clean up my apartment or do my chores but turning on supposedly "sexy" music really just gets me UP AND I'M READY TO CLEAN AN ENTIRE HOUSE WHOOOOOP

[iron escarp]

lmaooo thats so funny

[wicked jungle]

it's so weird hahaha

everybody else thinks of some romantic or other stuff and here i am
aggressively cleaning the counter

[iron escarp]

its all fun and games until you pull out the theatre playlist

watch me go at like 5x the speed of a regular human

i used to listen to theatre music while working out(as well as powerwolf andd sabaton)

[wicked jungle]

hahaha, your poor powerlevels tho, i totally get that

[iron escarp]

nothing like beetlejuice the musical music to make my brain GO

[supple brook]

I'm pretty sure if twitter/tiktok discourse kids interacted with actual queer elders they'd have a heart attack

[wicked jungle]

or my workout playlist was mainly the weeknd songs???
like why is my brain like this 😂

[iron escarp]

they would

[wicked jungle]

HAVE YOU SEEN THE GRINDR OLD GAYS REACT????
i hold such respect over every single one of them and i love them to the moon and back

[supple brook]

There are so many dudes who have identified as lesbians since the 70s and fully socially transitioned and see themselves as men

[supple brook]

I have!! It's so good lol

[wicked jungle]

i would love to meet more older members of the lgbt just to truly drive the point home in my own head, that lgbt was ALWAYS there

[iron escarp]

i actually know somebody thats um on tiktok thats ace and an older guy

[supple brook]

Oh I realized the wording is kinda iffy, I didn't mean this in a "trans men just see themselves as men" way but more like a "they identify as lesbians and dudes at the same time"

[iron escarp]

he takes like an approach where sometimes he makes more educational content and sometimes makes more lighthearted and validating content

[wicked jungle]

it's still this internalized "uh" feeling when i compare the age of people i know personally who are queer and all of them are around 20-35 which is fine - i just really got the idea of "gay is now just kinda like a popular mental illness" (fucking love my surrounding for that) drilled into me

[iron escarp]

i know how that feels

[wicked jungle]

i know of older ace people on the interwebs but still, yeah

when i just got to my uni i almost shed a few tears because their main first building next to my main lecture halls has lgbt flags plastered all over it's beautiful

[worn pecan]

I was told that trans men can't identify as lesbian, though. Well, more so that it's 'greatly frowned upon in the trans community'. Is that true?

[supple brook]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying lol. There are people who literally have identified that way for decades. There are still trans women who identify as cross dressers. Or older trans people who identify as transsexual. And people keep coming up with more and more rules and dividing the community more and more, wanting to put everyone into neat little boxes. Queer experiences have been intersecting for as long as queer spaces have existed. Bisexual women used to identify as lesbians cause there was no other word

There is better understanding now and that's not a bad thing, but this whole wanting to nearly identify and box everyone in is so counter productive and just straight up erases queer history

[blissful granite]

gAyMEN to that.

[civic shadow]

😆

[blissful granite]

There's absolutely nothing wrong with having an identity and a culture, but the issues with our modern-day understanding of microcultures leads us down a rabbit hole of "what exactly was this person" and as our Village Grandma of Queer Life ™️ , these identities didn't really exist. We were just all the same, a culture of freaks and misfits who bound together instead of apart.

[civic shadow]

I understand labels because it really helps people find who they are and others to understand who you are but I don't really use them. I'm just an awkward bean who exists and lives life with crippling anxiety 👍

Tho I do identify as a unicorn of course 😌🦄

[blissful granite]

I identify as a Diva.

[civic shadow]

That Emily emote omgggg

[blissful granite]

It was a much different world 20-30 years ago. The world hated all of us. We found strength in each other. So we celebrated our similarities more often than focusing on our differences. And as life changes, so too does the dynamic. The world never stops changing. 🙂

[undone gale]

@blissful granite Are you like an LGBTQAI2s+ community speaker cause you speak the truth

[blissful granite]

I have been. I traveled from New York to San Francisco advocating LGBTQ+ representation in gaming back when Grand Theft Auto was still murdering people in the streets saying the lyrics to YMCA>

I've spoken on panels with other video game journalists advocating for queer representation.

This was like 10 years ago

[undone gale]

Cool that sounds like a really fun job

[blissful granite]

More of a hobby. 🙂 That sh 🏳️‍🌈 t doesn't pay money. LOL

[undone gale]

Makes sense

[blissful granite]

I got some flack back then from my two publications for being "political"

You can't start a revolution by sitting down

[undone gale]

True

Damn your so wise

[blissful granite]

D'awww.

[undone gale]

Haha lol 😆

But like how the Frick do you know so much about LGBTQIA2s+

[blissful granite]

Every generation, you need us hellraisers to stand up and say "enough is enough" and make ourselves heard. It's not an easy job.

[undone gale]

Yeah I have had to stand to a person that thought they were the boss of everyone Crap those fricken people make me mad

[blissful granite]

My brother's best friend is nonbinary trans, my brother is asexual, my closest friends are trans, bi, pansexual, gay, and lesbian. Sometimes you just gotta keep finding the people who have the same goals and ambitions and stay close, learn, and experience their stories.

[undone gale]

Yeah

My friends are pansexual, nonbinary, bisexual, gay, lesbian, and my friend sister trans to a boy

[blissful granite]

If it's a passion in your life, keep pushing, pick and choose your battles, and never be afraid to stand up.

I still remember other people in the community bashing my efforts, telling me we'll never get marriage, we won't be accepted, hate crimes will get worse, we'll be illegal one day, what you're doing is a waste of time -- can't listen to those folk. They just want to coast through life, not make waves.

[undone gale]

Its so fricken annoying

[blissful granite]

It is, but never let it discourage you.

[undone gale]

I had an enemy that is the most homophobic transphobic person I know and they just piss me off

[blissful granite]

And never, ever focus all your efforts online. It doesn't change a thing. You have to be out in the streets, talking to politicians, rubbing elbows with the right people, and making your voice heard.

I know a lot of people don't want to hear that, but take it from someone who devoted 30 years of political activism for the right to have the LGBTQIA+ community where it is today: complaining online about LGBT representation in gaming did nothing for me. I had to fly across the country and talk to the developers myself.

[undone gale]

Oh wow

[blissful granite]

I've met Miyamoto, maker of Mario. Naka, maker of Sonic. Iga, maker of Castlevania, I met Yoshi P to convince him to allow same-gender marriages.

(in ffxiv)

[undone gale]

YOU'VE MET MIYAMOTO!?!

[blissful granite]

Yep. He's cool.

[undone gale]

Sorry I just love Nintendo

Literally one of my favorite video game brands is Nintendo or anything related to Nintendo

[blissful granite]

I was very disappointed in my talks with Nintendo. They once made Birdo a trans* character, but the retconned and removed the whole thing. And they've never made an LGBTQ+ character since. They're horrible when it comes to this stuff.

[undone gale]

Oh that sucks

[blissful granite]

Original Birdo in the SMB2 manual

Today:

The language was pretty transphobic, too, by today's standards.

[undone gale]

Wow

[blissful granite]

That, unfortunately, is Nintendo. Dealing with them is like dealing with hyper conservatives.

I had a lot more luck with Sega.

[undone gale]

Annoying

Well thats good, ugh slowmode

And the person that is the most homophopic, transphobic person i know, when I came out as lesbian was like "There is no way she's gay" and I am like bruh.

[worn pecan]

"He thinks he is a girl"
OR you think you're valid by being haha funni to the conservatives

[undone gale]

ugh the nerve of some peoples or companies

[blissful granite]

The other notable problem in the 80s-90s is that all the trans* figures were all villains.

[worn pecan]

I love Nintendo games don't get me wrong cough hence my 373873973833 pokemon ocs cough but good god, throw us a bone

[undone gale]

Anyway I gtg help my parents pack

Nice talking with you guys

👋 bye

[blissful granite]

Capcom also went back and forth. Wikipedia still has it up.
Street Fighter IV's producer Yoshinori Ono, when asked in an interview about Poison's gender, stated: "Let's set the record straight: In North America, Poison is officially a post-op transsexual woman. But in Japan, she simply tucks her business away to look female."[16] He later emphasized it again when asked about what female characters could be included in the game Street Fighter IV, stating that it would be too confusing to include her due to the region-specific gender.[17] However, in a 2011 interview with Electronic Gaming Monthly at the Tokyo Game Show, he stated that Capcom "doesn't have a stance technically", and while they wouldn't give an official answer, felt it was up to the viewer to decide. He added that his intent was to please all fans and that the mystery behind her gender was the core of the character. During the same interview, a Capcom representative further added that they worked closely with GLAAD, an organization concerned with the portrayal of LGBT people in media, to ensure "anything that might be offensive has been very tailored to not be" for Poison's portrayal in Street Fighter X Tekken.[18]

[worn pecan]

""very tailored to not be""
actually you don't get to decide whats offensive or not but okay

[blissful granite]

Some of the conversations I had with major game developers were... positive, some they didn't really want to discuss anything, a few were really open and willing to make changes. But others are just so freakin' obsessed with money they don't want to anger the cishet folk.

Capcom's a great example of how the producer definitely wanted to make a statement that Poison is post-op trans, but Capcom's legal team very likely cracked down and said DON'T YOU DARE and had to backpeddle.

[worn pecan]

It's always about the money and public image, and it shouldn't be. This is why things don't change. Because nobody risks a damn thing.

[frigid vine]

Maybe not yet. But we're all choosing to live authentically regardless, and thats enough of a change that it's only a matter of time. May not happen in my life time, though I will admit I'd love to see it, but knowing that people are heading in that direction little by little is enough for me, at the very least.
As a TransNB, I enjoy knowing that Im fully out of the closet with my family and I'm not worried about being killed for it. That is not always the case, sure, but there are a lot of people who are also in my same place. And I love that that has changed enough for them.
I'm also a Unicorn (optimist) so, that also helps, I guess.

[worn pecan]

My family is very accepting as well, and I feel very fortunate that they are as I know a lot of people do not have that luxury. I try to focus on helping others and supporting them wherever I can c: It's important to me that people feel supportive, so I end up being the makeshift supportive parent figure for a lot of people I know <3

[hushed mauve]

If you all are looking for something to lift your spirits, this story might help. I’m a student teacher in a kindergarten class graduating in a few weeks. Last Christmas a friend of mine gave me a trans appreciation coloring book. Today, I copied the pages and brought them into the Kindergarten class and talked to them about pride month, and what it means to me (I am asexual and nonbinary). When the kids were going home some of them showed the coloring pages to their parents, and one mom told me she thought it was wonderful that they were learning about gender at such a young age. Since the beginning of the year, they've known I use they/them pronouns, and this allowed them to connect on a deeper level.

[worn pecan]

Okay that's just straight up wholesome. I'm happy for you and them! Thank you for teaching them this.

[untold glacier]

Dunno if i should put this in the art channel or this one, but ill post it here since i like how it turned out ;w; have a pride kitty in honor of pride month!

[orchid flume]

I LOVE THAT!

Especially as a non-binary lesbian

[rose ice]

Just curious but as a teacher what honorifics do you use? Ms? Mr? Mx? Etc.

I'm non binary myself and just don't know what I should use!

[dry swift]

TW: bug
||https://jumpingjacktrash.tumblr.com/post/652927910176604160/the-puns-are-important-see-happy-june-878||

[untold glacier]

non binary lesbians unite !!!!

[orchid flume]

Non binary lesbians unite!

[orchid flume]

Me and my partner spent some time together and it was so nice

[wicked jungle]

lego... ninjago...

[arctic crypt]

Yep

[flint dagger]

Ah, just asking! We have a wonderful Indonesian channel if you don't know yet! :)

[arctic crypt]

Amazing. Thank you

[dark patio]

Man you ever just have the option of coming out to one of your oldest family friends presented to you and tear up a little over the thought that he's someone who might actually get it 😭

[orchid flume]

Teaching my partner all about my hyperfixation is so fun!

[valid timber]

hey, hey, hey, super awesome Twitter thread that's a couple years old by now, but it's got a hell of a lot of pride flags made up from Space pictures
and as a space nerd, I love them, hope someone here will as well, happy Pride month Y'all!
https://twitter.com/ohmwu/status/1004761742545772544

Laurie 🍃🐛 (@ohmwu)

I made a nonbinary flag out of nebulas, feel free to steal it!

Might be a handy thing for galactian alignments, like nebularians or stellarians.

Retweets

905

Likes

2270

Twitter · Jun 7, 2018, 4:27 PM

[wicked jungle]

galaxy nb aesthetic is chefs kiss

[tight robin]

That's beautiful

[harsh knot]

Still thinking bout aggressive pride

https://twitter.com/whyenn_reader/status/1399404826505719814?s=21

Whyenn. | ART PINNED (@Whyenn_Reader)

In honour of pride month I propose:

aggressive pride flags

Retweets

35151

Likes

123577

Twitter · May 31, 2021, 4:38 PM

[mellow sand]

I did both on the left. I am a happy gay.

[orchid flume]

In this house we stan powerful transbians!

[mellow sand]

😊

[orchid flume]

(Also love your PFP, Eda is the best part of Owl House and I will not take criticism on that statement.)

[mellow sand]

Yep. I thought she exudes a powerful energy I want to exude.

Also she is really attractive because of that.

[orchid flume]

Fun fact, my gf and I started watching The Owl house because when it comes to rep I'm a desperate lesbian and she's a desperate bi, and we very quickly decided Eda was way more interesting.

[mellow sand]

I actually find it nice that lesbians love powerful and confident women. We all seem to want to see each other be the best.

[orchid flume]

She got some school assignment to do a reverse storyboard and picked TOH as what she wanted to do and she did such a good job.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lPXVBBQWBs&list=LL&index=56

[orchid flume]

Yeah, strong confident women are the best!

[mellow sand]

Okay. That was cool.

[orchid flume]

I work out (almost) everyday (haven't been doing it as much soley because it's too hot outside) for the sole purpose of being able to carry her around

[mellow sand]

I plan to do the same so I can lift my Girlfriend the next time I visit her.

[orchid flume]

Hell yeah! Flexing lesbian club!

[mellow sand]

Yes!!!

[orchid flume]

Meanwhile for my partner it was like
Her: "I'm a professional artist who does youtube animations."
Me: Swoons.

[mellow sand]

[orchid flume]

Comp het be like, "You SURE your gay and not pretending." Then I see a buff woman on tv or get texted by my partner and it all all vanished

[mellow sand]

Okay just talking about this is reminding me how much I love my girlfriend. Next time I see her I need to make sure she knows that. Long distance is painful.

[orchid flume]

Same mine lives in the Philippines and I live in the US and there's a twelve hour time difference

[orchid flume]

I'm sending you all my support, it's tough but worth it!

[dark patio]

Long distance is SO hard

[mellow sand]

Ouch. I just live in southern England and she lives in Scotland. Still no matter how far away. Being apart is still being apart.

[orchid flume]

Yeah... Still, having a messed up sleeping schedule is a small price.

[mellow sand]

Understandable.

[orchid flume]

I stayed up all night to play Splatoon with her.

I am unashamed that Splatoon is how I figured out I was a lesbian, because that's really funny to mention.

[mellow sand]

Heck I realised I was trans thanks to My Little Pony. We can learn so many things about ourselves from the weirdest sources.

[orchid flume]

Yeah! If you don't mind me asking, what part of MLP was your trans awakening?

[brazen willow]

i realized i wasnt male due to some anime i cant remember the name off

some non salior moon magical girl anime

[mellow sand]

Not any specific scene or episode. Just relating to the characters just being different but all being girls. Just kinda... made me think. Hard to explain but the character of Rarity really helped. She just felt the most me.

[orchid flume]

That's beautiful!

[pure lagoon]

(sneaks in here to say finding out you're trans through media/shows/games is a definitely a mood)

[brazen willow]

alex invasion

[pure lagoon]

hehehehe

[orchid flume]

The way Splatoon 2 was my gay awakening is there are these two characters in it, Pearl and Marina. And they're REALLY close "friends" like trying to avoid the censors by saying friends kinda thing

That's the fourth Alex I know on this server now!

[pure lagoon]

We're multiplying ;)

[orchid flume]

Attack of the Alex's

[brazen willow]

soon we shall all be alex

[pure lagoon]

join us

[brazen willow]

i am now alex

[mellow sand]

But honestly the first character to start making cracks into the realisation was Jade from Beyond Good and Evil. There never really just one character or media that was my trans awakening.

[pure lagoon]

[brazen willow]

jk jk im actaully heather

[mellow sand]

Also yes. Those two are definitely in love.

[orchid flume]

According to the Octo expansion art book they moved in and ADOPTED AGENT 8 TOGETHER

[pure lagoon]

That's so cute!

[orchid flume]

They regularly say I love you on air, and flirt with each other say I love you in a couple separate Splatfest announcements, and the Splatfest art has no heterosexual explanation.

[blissful granite]

is i love you flirting though? i say i love you to every friend i have.

[pure lagoon]

Depends, honestly! Some people are really casual with the phrase, some only use it in a super familiar or romantic way.

It's definitely more fun for fans to interpret it as more romantic than playful in the above instance

[mellow sand]

Well I am going to sleep. Had fun discussing the gay. 😁

[orchid flume]

Goodnight!

Here's some of the flirtier stuff

I was busy so I couldn't post em

Not so much flirty, but very cute

[iron escarp]

awh thats literally so cute

[orchid flume]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/ee06b6e63fc83ae4e84eca2474cc8885/tumblr_pacodurz5E1wysgnxo1_500.gif

There's also this moment in the end of the DLC where they have a very enthusiastic hug

[hushed mauve]

I actually use Tr. as in “teacher” I like that it refers to my profession rather than my gender. I also know trans teachers that use Mx. and I think as long as you feel comfortable with the term, that's what's most important ☺️

[rose ice]

Ooh awesome!

[orchid flume]

How is that pronounced?

A while back I made my own interpretation of the god of death, and she might be the most lesbian character to ever lesbian.

She's extremely tall 6'8", is on the more muscular side, wears a suit at all times, and is canonically a lesbian.

[civic shadow]

How do you pronounce Mx. ?

[humble tusk]

I believe Mx is pronounced "mix"

[civic shadow]

Oooh thought so

[deep vine]

Haha cute

[orchid flume]

The follow up line was Pearl promising they'd stay together forever finishing with "it's you and me at the end of the universe 'Rina."

[harsh knot]

Ok so basically I confessed to my crush and he said he felt the same way so I’m unbelievably happy and gay™️

[signal hull]

CONGRATS!!!

Much UwU

[gloomy tendon]

My roommate sent me a message wishing me a good pride month 😭 🥺 I'm so excited to live with her in September!

[civic shadow]

Demi said they're pansexual and I'm like "ME TOO BABY"

[orchid flume]

Congratulations

[orchid flume]

I feel hella confident when talking about being a lesbian, but somehow mentioning I'm non-binary makes me feel weird

[prisma agate]

Yay gay people

[brazen willow]

Gay!

[lunar grail]

hi gay person

[brazen willow]

Also is that the mom from Johnny test?

[prisma agate]

Yes

[lunar grail]

i wish i didnt have to be the dad

[prisma agate]

Thems the breaks of a malewife

[lunar grail]

sighh