1 Month Feedback

[neon plover]

I drew these images a month apart, and the girl was the first thing I drew in my adult life. I used to draw a tiny bit in middle school and now I'm trying to get good enough to do mocks for other artists I want to commission. Any feedback on the man here?

[cosmic lintel]

That's pretty good progress! One thing I noticed is the collar bone, it should make a little bump like this. Also heres a short video, might help you more https://youtube.com/shorts/HsBJDcRXxvM?si=Nk6bhoNd8YMEBBj4

[neon plover]

this is good feedback. I did a pass at drawing his body at some point and noticed his shoulders were wrong but this is helpful!

[cosmic lintel]

May I redline it a little btw?

[neon plover]

sure

I think his neck is a little thick too, but I try not to stick on one image too much

[cosmic lintel]

Ah yes, I noticed it a little too, maybe since you made his neck thick you could extend the shoulders a little more?

[neon plover]

I generally wish I could index more onto realism, but this is as realistic as I can draw right now. probably best to widen the shoulders AND shrink the neck a tad

[cosmic lintel]

Yeah!

[neon plover]

I didn't want to emphasize his shoulders too much since he's supposed to be kind of flabby, but I made him look jacked with weird shoulders instead

[cosmic lintel]

Ok, here is my version, which you may not be able to fully trust since I didn't use a reference.

[neon plover]

neck definitely looks so much better

I didn't actually use a reference either so you may not be able to trust anything I drew at all!

[cosmic lintel]

lol

[neon plover]

the collar bump looks good, but it goes against my understanding of shoulder muscles there

[cosmic lintel]

Well, hope this helps

[cosmic lintel]

I don't study shoulder muscle anatomy which is why.