And the game improves
#general-chat
twilit pebble
There is no point in using anything worth 100k roubles or above
U can literally go in with a pistol and ur good
grizzled cosmos
Questions, what armor and what servers?
grizzled cosmos
There's your first mistake, Untar is class 3. pstgzh and ap 6.3 go through it like butter
grizzled cosmos
tt pst still pens Untar
twilit pebble
I just use it when I find it so scavs dont black my stomach
grizzled cosmos
the minimum cheap armor you should be using is press armor, also EU servers are flaming hot garbage, so like I said you likely desynched.
and he mag dumped you
twilit pebble
No it was 1 shot from tt and I was dead
grizzled cosmos
He was thorax'd
I don't think TT pst can frag and insta-black a throax?
If you've got the connection for it, try connecting to NA servers. DC or NYC.
You honestly might have better luck.
twilit pebble
That's what I'm thinking like how the fuck did he 1 shot me with a tt
And it wasn't a headshot
Like wtf
grizzled cosmos
You might've honestly just gotten unlucky and got fragged
Cause I've had the 6b47 helmet ricochet BS before.
Where it should've penned.
twilit pebble
All I know it I'll be back when the game is semi playable
grizzled cosmos
And it's saved my life
The game is perfectly playable m'dude, you just got beyond unlucky.
twilit pebble
Naa game is really trash right now
grizzled cosmos
I disagree, but you do you m'dude.
I'll go back to popping dudes on woods.
Just remember when you come back.
Level 4+ armor or nothing
glossy ridge
can we get rid of the market bots pls
grizzled cosmos
Their gonna be addressing a whole lot of third party programs come .12
Maybe even finally banning ReShade. 👏
obtuse umbra
they need to do something about windowed fullscreen mode tabbing out and the game breaking is getting old quickly
glossy ridge
oof
spark bronze
Sparkling water is just tv static in a bottle
modest ice
anyone ever going to speak on how much money battlestate has gotten from players and they still cant get the core mechanics of the fucking game to work. cheaters are worse then ever..
spark bronze
I think you mixed up the general chat and memes channel
grizzled cosmos
It's a shitty russian dev, and game is still under construction. Give it time m'dude.
placid basalt
but I can
winged hearth
Anyone here play tarkov on a laptop which can handle interchange and shoreline at 60fps?
also christ Lucy, cry harder please
quaint stag
@placid basalt Yeah, consider this a verbal warning. Don't post stuff like that again.
quaint stag
It hurts to look at that.
grizzled cosmos
offtopic =/ shitposting
placid basalt
Mikhailo
placid basalt
If it hurt your eyes
Sorry
Two
French toast
If it hurt your eyes
sorry
shrug
It was funny
Have you EVER seen a link that long
That was -Actual- lyrics
To Gas gas gas
quaint stag
That's nice.
To answer your question, I have, unfortunately, seen longer links. But don't try to compete, because I honestly don't give a damn how funny you find it.
winged hearth
Anyone here got a laptop that can run shoreline at 60fps?
quaint stag
I'm not aware of any laptops capable of running this game at 60fps, but that's just me
winged hearth
Yeah its a stretch for sure
quaint stag
I had a friend who tried playing on his laptop. It took him something about 10-15 minutes to load in, and by then there wasn't much left for him to do.
quaint stag
But, it was a mac, not a gaming laptop, so that makes sense.
lusty dragon
it depends which laptop you are talking about lmao
quaint stag
Yeah.
lusty dragon
If it's a toaster from 1999, of course it will over heat
But if it's one of those ultra gaming hyper omega X ultra WXEk+ Pro Gaming SLI X laptop, of course it will run it
quaint stag
I'm not too familiar with gaming laptops, so I can't contribute much to this discussion.
lusty dragon
Oh, I did put 2 ultra in that title, Marketing purposes
I am not either, but generally, the specs of a laptop is a few % lower than their desktop counter part
Anyway, it's late here so I must go
winged hearth
haha 5152
fierce oracle
G
frozen hull
why there isnt a dedicated solo server? I keep bumping into groups...
proven saffron
azure scaffold
Wheres the server invite at?
bold trellis
https://discordapp.com/invite/escapefromtarkovofficial @jagged field
@azure scaffold
Sorry Chris Misclick
fierce oracle
Scav hard
azure scaffold
Just get back harrasing people in your own server
smoky grotto
hi
neat furnace
anyone wanna do some sniping ?Xd
earnest sluice
@runic dragon do you still need a beta?
crude saddle
hey anyone got an extra secure container i can get?
gleaming dirge
oof
elfin dagger
I have a question for you techguys out there
How do I swap my ctrl alt tab back to Alt tab
Something glitched out my keyboard so that my alt tab is now CTRL Tab and I don't like it
vast flicker
Anyone up for woods raid?
dapper oriole
hello. @vast flicker are you still up for it?
dapper oriole
sure. i dont have a mic and suck horribly at the game but I would like to. I didn't know this server existed so this will be the first time ive played with a team.
Lvl 6
if you dont want to no prob
dapper oriole
ok
vast flicker
Alright gear up and ensure ur stuff, if anyone of us gets killed we can then retrieve it
Whats ur username?
dapper oriole
for some reason my overlay isnt properly working ingame so i might not be super talkative
dapper oriole
Sniper_kid_308
same as mah discord'
so can you team up as scavs too? Ive always wondered
elfin dagger
ANyone know how to change a alt tab that randomly switched to CTRL tab?
dapper oriole
should be in key binds
elfin dagger
no, desktop
elfin dagger
LIES!
dapper oriole
WOAH
elfin dagger
Alt tab now is ctrl tab for some glitched out reason
dapper oriole
thats so cool
i didnt know alt tab was a thing
always used windows and click
try restarting your pc i guess
elfin dagger
It was because of the restart
dapper oriole
ive had my entire keyboard stop functioning before and a restart helped
hmm
idk then
vast flicker
You sure you didnt recieve anything?
elfin dagger
ity was a windows update
dapper oriole
yeah
vast flicker
Can u add me?
dapper oriole
is yours StaticSnow?
vast flicker
Static_Snow
dapper oriole
alright thanks
elfin dagger
That was weird, I must have clicked a keybind that changed my alt tab to ctrl tab
dapper oriole
hmm
@vast flicker did you get it? your profile showed up.
here im going to restart the game it might be buggy for a bit or something
smoky grotto
maybe lmao
I'll tell you waht Hatan
When we were on deployment;
We came under extremely accurate fire
It just so happened...
That there was a armor patrol about 2 ks out
We called them in, and when that mfing abrams came over the hill
I swear to god I was hearing metallica
Oh the abrams took some rounds, don't get me wrong
But it completely erased those guys bloodlines from the face of the earf
Sometimes think about switching my MOS
140 what
were they trying to destroy whole villages or something?
I would imagine the shells were too heavy for the crew @proven ermine
It would still be good to have them
Because the cold war wouldn't be the last conflict. I don't understand why they would purposely downgrade a tank just because we didnt go to war
Congress is full of a bunch of pansy ass bitches
Glad Jon Stewart tore into them
I seen a facebook video of this little
kid
He has a helmet on, and was singing the Army song
These people were actually saying he was brainwashed
They're just bitches my man
Everything is brainwashing
Hard times create strong me
men
Strong men create good times
and good times create weak men
Meh
Let parents teach kids what they want
When they get older, they can make their own decisions
cold swan
Not always.
smoky grotto
That's true
bold trellis
You ever hear of cults?
smoky grotto
I didn't experience that
cold swan
That too.
smoky grotto
My parents were druggies, so I kinda did my own thing growing up
cold swan
Neither did I. I have the exact opposite.
Oof.
My mother gives 0 fucks. About anything.
Lmao.
smoky grotto
Yeah, I grew up around drugs and SWAT teams and shit, and it kinda influenced me to... not be like that lol
cold swan
Fair.
smoky grotto
This dude was smart. I remember one time
We went into walmart, this was when the first Ipod came out
He went and grabbed a tool box, got the tools out, unscrewed this case in front of everyone, and took the ipod
people thought he worked there
cold swan
🤔 🤔 🤔
smoky grotto
The mfer was smart LMAO
cold swan
I mean most of the time if you walk into an office and say you're from IT you can just... Take computers.
People don't really care. It's not their problem.
smoky grotto
Indeed
The difference between my mom and dad, was that my dad did worse shit, but he was still a good person
My mom, not so much
He's in prison right now, but I have a fairly decent relationship with him
cold swan
F.
smoky grotto
He's only in for like 2 more years
He was in the Army too,
But he got med dropped during RIP
So I decided to join and finish what he couldnt
But I use this aggression in Tarkov so it all works out LOL
yeah, you have to use the trauma of your past
thats the secret
smoky grotto
ripppp
cold swan
I say yeet too
smoky grotto
is sitting in here and roasting the mods
bold trellis
para dosent even play
smoky grotto
says SKS is best weapon
bold trellis
Sks is fun
cold swan
I wanna get into uni. Except I need to finish an online course.
In a week.
And have no motivation lmao.
It's aight
smoky grotto
I'm not a good single shot guy tbh
I forgot about that M1A gift
I went and got it and sold it
or ma1
whatever it is
cold swan
Honestly the SA-58 recoil is completely manageable.
smoky grotto
who here wants to spawn in with me so I can ultimately kill them and take their stuff
high level loot only pls
smoky grotto
I appreciate it tho
cold swan
Ye man I got a lotta high loot
1 kit and 500k rub.
I'm doing great.
That's partially why I don't play Tarkov either lmao. I'm too broke.
bold trellis
When you have 500k rub but run vulkans
cold swan
Fair.
cold swan
Very fair.
smoky grotto
well yes
cold swan
I'm a mod and I'm poor.
smoky grotto
but actually no
cold swan
Nope
smoky grotto
well
cold swan
Sorry you got more money and items.
cold swan
F.
smoky grotto
I am a global in CS
nobody pays me
what kind of sexism is going on here
is it cause im a male
No, it's because I'm not on C9
cold swan
Oof CS.
smoky grotto
It helps with my reflexes
Problem is, I aim in tarkov like I do in CS
and that just isnt feasible
bitter patio
Are NVG's rare in the game?
Well that makes me feel a little better after loosing them...
main kettle
I'm like fresh as shit to the game, like 2hrs in and got some alright stuff anyone that wants to duo with me/teach me a little bit?
I'm pretty far, got a few gear sets+ fully loaded out gun
im just wondering about how to actually go about getting into later stages of the game
im a vet at like csgo,arma,rust, ive just never played this game. my buddy helped me out a bit but had to go
bitter patio
You know a lot has changed since I last played, did scavs always spawn with sights? and by always I mean randomly ofc.
I've never seen anything like this.
Good to know.
pale depot
anyone selling a beta,epsilon,or gama pm if selling
prisma island
any brutal slamming death meatal fans in here?
cinder compass
hell yeah dude i love nickelback 🤘
smoky grotto
Anyone have good beginner resources ? Just bought the game
swift ridge
REMOVE LAB CARD, that useless and dosent give me any motivation to play
normal yacht
excuse me
grizzled cosmos
Lab keycard is fine, just play things that AREN'T labs.
indigo spindle
or just buy a keycard if you like labs that much
mystic wasp
Found KIBA key on a Scav run. I decided to wait until the very end of the raid to extract just so that I didn’t die with this 1.9 million ruble key. I was running to the south east extract and spotted another player. I only had two mags for an AK74M that I was using iron sights with. I went prime in the grass hoping he didn’t see me, I thought I would wait him out since there’s 11 minutes left in the raid. 6 minutes left in the raid I’ve heard nothing and try to run 100 yards to the extract. I’m shot in the head right away. I now only run interchange with PMC gamma container now so I don’t have to go through the pain of that again.
gleaming dirge
youtube wont load at all until i unplug and plug in my arctis 7 dongle lel
quirks of computers 💔
hazy mantle
It was fine for months with the same headphones.
Just shitty ones I got with my phone.
I did a windows rollback and now it's fine
Maybe an update messed it up
Yeah
I regret everything
Probs yeah
10 bucks it's gonna update again and mess with my shit again
Not really
this is the computer I work on
Aka the only I keep up to date lul
I didn't even get one IIRC
Just updated when I turned it off
smoky grotto
hey guys i just upgraded to eod and got my gift with the item case n stuff wen you reset ur account and i had 2 gift msges for some reason and 1 of them was a whole nother gammer container and loads of other stuff was that suppose to happen or was it a glitch? as i do hnot want to be banned
warped yacht
@smoky grotto Contact support through #547868292686151695 and just use one of the packages, don't open the other.
smoky grotto
@warped yacht i allready took all the items in my inv
delicate bay
@iron sonnet no its not, its for all topics "General community chat for all topics, related to Escape from Tarkov or not."
warped yacht
@smoky grotto Just contact support and don't worry
delicate bay
@smoky grotto if you upgraded to eod, you would have got loot from the upgrade. it gives you the gamma container and the extra loot that eod comes with in the System message and was one of the items an m1a?
smoky grotto
is that the big gun
delicate bay
big yellow gun
smoky grotto
yeh i got that
smoky grotto
but i also got a nother sniper
delicate bay
yeah
smoky grotto
and stuff like that
delicate bay
that comes with the upgrade
smoky grotto
bvt i got 2 instead of 1
smoky grotto
yeah
delicate bay
yeah
smoky grotto
i got 2
delicate bay
nothings wrong
smoky grotto
but i pretty much got 2 of each thing
delicate bay
you got 2 gamma containers?
smoky grotto
yes
delicate bay
lol
smoky grotto
exacly
delicate bay
did you reset your account?
delicate bay
yeah
i think i know what happened
btw you dont have to reset your character anymore
delicate bay
but you did right?
smoky grotto
ohh you dont have to reset to get ur upgrade anymore
delicate bay
no
smoky grotto
i did not know that
delicate bay
not anymore
smoky grotto
i havent played game in ages i just came back
delicate bay
what i think has happened is that its bugged out, gave you the new year gift, then its gave you that extra system message with the bonus loot like the gamma etc
warped yacht
@smoky grotto Describe your problem in tickets please
warped yacht
Then it's a problem which must be fixed.
smoky grotto
i just would hate to be banned
delicate bay
your not gonna get banned for that
warped yacht
You won't, don't worry
warped yacht
Thanks, they will answer back as soon as possible.
smoky grotto
ok
smoky grotto
@warped yacht do you know wen this will get sorted as i kinda need to go out pretty soon
warped yacht
You could come back later and see, every message Will stay there,don't worry
smoky grotto
do you know what the outcome will be of this
warped yacht
I don't know, but you don't have to worry. They Will probably ask you for info to adress the problem/bug.
smoky grotto
can you guarantee there will be no ban?
hazy mantle
You're not gonna get banned for just a bug
smoky grotto
ok
smoky grotto
😃
winged hearth
why is this happening?
quaint stag
A lot of people were protesting it, leading to instances like this
But let's move on before we get too political.
cold swan
@quaint stag
quaint stag
Soon
quaint stag
Hold up
As much as I want to ask how someone could make a uni class for drugs, I'm intruiged. What does it entail
cold swan
It's a beginner course for biopharmaceutical science.
Anyone can take it as an elective though.
BPS 1101 Drugs 101 (3 units)
Drug history, discovery and use. Origins of disease, drug function, side effects and safety. Toxicology, pain relief, cold medications, performance-enhancing drugs for sports, antibiotics and cancer chemotherapy.
It's actually pretty cool sounding and apparently it's stupid popular.
So I'm taking it.
quaint stag
Origins of disease tbh that'd be enough for me to enroll. Can't blame you, I'd take it too
cold swan
Yeah I asked my one friend there for some elective suggestions because idk what's good there and I needed 6 between my first two semesters.
hazy mantle
You'd take drugs
cold swan
He suggested that and witchcraft.
hazy mantle
Classic french.
cold swan
The witchcraft one is a history class about like the Salem witch trials and shit.
Traditions of it.
hazy mantle
Marry me so I get canadian too.
cold swan
Etc.
quaint stag
Right
cold swan
Lmfao
cold swan
Silver is now jealous
But yeah I thought he was bullshitting me.
I see someone say Drugs 101 and witchcraft as elective suggestions.
He's gotta earn money to be here somehow
I can't afford him.
hazy mantle
I kinda have tits I guess
cold swan
Kek.
bold trellis
You been around here a lot more @hazy mantle
hazy mantle
😏
weak yacht
No, i just searched for that
weak yacht
I never forget anything that is booley
weak yacht
If i get 1 euro for everytime i got booleyed or someone said shit about the wiki
i would be rich
weak yacht
@vocal folio i can give you my paypal donation link
modest ice
flying is normal in this game
weak yacht
@hazy mantle he takes care of me
hazy mantle
is this a one way relationship
weak yacht
coins
like 5 cent
@hazy mantle people told me you want to do the wiki initiation ritual
hazy mantle
please no bully
weak yacht
I never booley
hazy mantle
"people" as in Kagou right
weak yacht
I can't speak about my sources
hazy mantle
it's not like I talked about wiki stuff to anyone else in like 3 weeks
weak yacht
I know everything
hazy mantle
you stole kagou :<
weak yacht
@hazy mantle wat
rotund osprey
Hey guys
weak yacht
@hazy mantle he's not working much at all in the last month's
Also he came by himself
rotund osprey
I think "Tactical Sling Bag" from Tarkov is made after this thing: TravTac Stage II
https://www.travtac.com/collections/value-bags/products/travtac-stage-ii-small-edc-tactical-sling-pack-900d?variant=11553272839
But some other people say it's from 5.11 Tactical
any chance you guys might know what that "Sling bag" comes from?
hazy mantle
@weak yacht TELL HIM I LOVE HIM
weak yacht
No u
hazy mantle
ok I will
pale depot
anyone selling a beta,epsilon,or gama pm if selling
jovial wedge
quaint stag
Wish I had HBO
grizzled cosmos
@mossy carbon
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mn0KBzK2Kho
mossy carbon
Finally
vocal folio
Make tcc great again
quaint stag
Sir I'm going to have to refer you to #587891580409479178 as the proper place for this
honest mountain
Stick to your oppression normie
proven ermine
GTB Im stealing your pepe
bold trellis
proven ermine
something something not the government so blah blah doesnt apply
spare void
Petition to allow us to post pictures in general chat
fiery coral
106 best scp dont ping me
hollow granite
@silk trail Pick me 3 random SCPs and I'll bet you one of them is probably classified wrong 😛
silk trail
I'm literally gonna hit the random button and throw them at ya
hollow granite
😄
fiery coral
He basicaly is
Contained by a lot of layers of lead in a floating cage
There is also the famous femur breaker that stops him from running from the facility
silk trail
I think the random SCP button only updates every 30s or something
Here's #2: http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-140
Ohh man Series 1 stuff didn't have the highest standards for scips
hollow granite
Okay, on that first one:
fiery coral
Its weird
But euclid is right for that lol
It cannot be contained cause of it's nature
hollow granite
"Upon reaching its roaming depth on March 23, 2019, 11:02 AM4, SCP-3924 began attacking any vessels within a 15 km radius of the sea surface above it; evasive manouvers resulted in no losses. SCP-3924 is continuing to ascend.
The SCPS Vigilance has been preemptively deployed to the region in the event that retaliation becomes necessary to ensure the continued containment of SCP-3924."
They don't know what it looks like
Have no means of actually damaging or controlling it
Are unclear on if they have any effective means of retaliating against it
And it has been showing erratic behavior, attacking undetectable entities, and is now travelling outside the area they previously thought it would remain in.
fiery coral
Euclid much
hollow granite
This is an Uncontained Keter SCP.
They don't have a way of stopping it, and it is actively making irrelevant their containment procedures.
It is extremely dangerous, and the procedure they have in place is "stay the fuck away and hope it doesn't come after us".
hollow granite
"Euclid-class SCPs are anomalies that require more resources to contain completely or where containment isn't always reliable."
"Keter-class SCPs are anomalies that are exceedingly difficult to contain consistently or reliably, with containment procedures often being extensive and complex."
fiery coral
This aint complex
Just track it and dont let people close
This isnt a 106 that tracks People down phases through walls and has its own dimension he can escape to
Its just a submarine
That cannot be contained by walld
*walls
hollow granite
Exactly.
fiery coral
The 2nd one is badly classified
silk trail
Just read the 3rd one. It's decent.
fiery coral
But this one nae
hollow granite
If it's dangerous and completely uncontainable, that's a Keter.
I'll read that 2nd one now, though.
fiery coral
Its not uncontainable
Tracking it and not letting People close is a form of contamination
Its like sayin that the god scp is a keter
Like lul
Read the 2nd one
silk trail
tldr: 3rd one is a phone that answers with the voice of the answerer's mother with full knowledge of everything the person answering knows, and knowledge of everybody near the answerer's actual mother.
cold swan
Ooh is this about SCPs?
silk trail
It can also apparently cause tumors to the answerer's mother
@cold swan Yeah, Brylyth told me to choose 3 random ones and they bet they would be classified wrongly
Because scips are often classified wrongly
cold swan
Well they are fan made.
fiery coral
The 2nd is imo a euclid not keter
silk trail
So I hit the random scp button 3 times and posted them here
cold swan
What someone considers keter vs Euclid is subjective.
silk trail
Yeah Papa, but the standards are pretty strict nowadays
fiery coral
I mean
fiery coral
That 2nd one is a static book with no memetic powers
Only a bit of mind control but u need to touch it while bleeding
silk trail
If I go to "recently created" and log all the scips posted today that survive a week, it would be less than 10%
cold swan
F.
hollow granite
Okay, I read through 2.
That is a Keter. It's not really dangerous - well, that dangerous, anyways, no more than crack - but damn if they have any clue how to contain it, considering how it's gone off WITHOUT the trigger condition they're trying to avoid.
fiery coral
But
Wat
Its just a damn book
That is unpleasant
And wants yo blood
Its not even like that symphony
hollow granite
And expands on it's own with many copies not contained
Number three is... why is this a Euclid?
hollow granite
OH NO IT'S A PHONE
They can lock it in a box and BAM contained
Same with the bloody symphony, too, actually
fiery coral
Umm
hollow granite
A lot of these things
Are known to be able to be, and ARE SUCESSFULLY locked in boxes, and left alone without consequence.
hollow granite
The phone rings.
Okay, we'll get a soundproof box :/
silk trail
Yeah, the phone if untouched is fine (although it does ring if people are near it but that's still safe.)
fiery coral
Bry
hollow granite
"SCP-2315 operates normally until placed in a room with a single subject below the age of 30 whose biological mother is still alive."
It is
RIDICULOUSLY containable
fiery coral
Okay I misunderstood orbb
I thought if someone calls it's number that happens
Cause then you would need a jammer of some sort
hollow granite
And you need to have THREE contacts with the SAME SUBJECT for it to be AS DANGEROUS AS SOMEONE TALKING TO YOU AND TELLING YOU TO DO DANGEROUS THINGS
No mind altering properties.
It just sounds like your mother.
And you can just hang up
silk trail
It did cause a tumor
hollow granite
Oh, it did?
fiery coral
So they fought they know what it does
Suddenly yikes so euclid
I dont understand that book being keter tho
Its like i will kill you if u do that that and that
silk trail
The phone seems able to cause effects to people outside of direct interaction so I understand Elucid
fiery coral
And unless you are bleeding the book basicaly smells funny
silk trail
Just not enough info about it yet so I would classify it as tentatively Elucid as well.
(The phone)
Read this when you have a chance. It's great. http://www.scp-wiki.net/joey-fucknuts-builds-a-flying-machine
fiery coral
Also *thought
silk trail
Changed the link. Accidently linked the second one
Perfection.
Joey had spent an entire day from dawn to dusk watching the sun to see what it actually did all day, and had hurt his eyes. This made him angry at first, because he had done nothing to the sun and he saw no reason why it had to hurt him, and then it made him afraid, because if it could hurt him without even touching him what else could it do. He then spent some time looking directly into the stream of a garden hose to cool his eyes off, wondering what exactly he was dealing with and whether he should stop. The sun was more mysterious and threatening than even the clouds were, and he began to think that the sun was the clouds' boss, probably. Which was why it was so strong and bright, just like his Boss.
That's where I guess we disagree.
You can not understand everything about what an anomaly does or how it works, but things can still be given a safe rating when you're certain about how to contain it.
Like with the phone - they aren't sure how it works, or quite how far it might take a D-class in the right facility with the right blood-pentagram-cthulu-vampire in the adjacent cell - but they know that if noone:
*Is under 30 and has a living mother
AND *Is alone with it
AND *Answers it
AND *Is alone and answers it again
AND *Is alone and answers it a third time
AND *Doesn't decide to or isn't forced to end the call
Then they have nothing to worry about
It takes so much to actually have it breach containment as to be almost laughable
Like, there's a bucket of gummy bears that's more dangerous than this thing
silk trail
I like the cake that multiplies exponentially unless eaten.
hollow granite
I mean
You want a crazy Keter?
The FUCKING ALARM CLOCK
BZZT BZZT BZZT BZZT MOTHAFUCKA
silk trail
The montauk procedure is the most hotly debated article, full stop.
silk trail
Do you not like it because you think it should be removed, or what?
...i'll link you dox
cold swan
Aight.
fiery coral
Dm it
cold swan
I'm guessing it's wrongly classified?
silk trail
I'll DM it.
cold swan
What's debated about it then?
fiery coral
Let him figure it out
cold swan
🤔
cold swan
I will read it when I finish eating.
fiery coral
I think
hollow granite
SCP 498 is arguably one of the most dangerous SCPs
fiery coral
I dont like montauk cause its so super mysterious and its pretty disgusting
silk trail
I'm fine with it being on the site. Don't argue with me about it though since it's actually been a couple years since I read it and can't get into specifics.
hollow granite
Could I get a link? >_<
silk trail
498?
fiery coral
What was the name of that fucking lizard
cold swan
Oh I could read it while eating. I don't get grossed out.
hollow granite
It's an alarm clock that goes off every 11 minutes
silk trail
Oh 498 is the clock
fiery coral
Ohh that thing
hollow granite
Like, give it any significant amount of time
And it will tear the fucking world assunder
cold swan
Just soundproof the room lul.
silk trail
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-871 is a great short read. Exponential cake.
fiery coral
I dont remember
hollow granite
@cold swan Remember, db is exponential (10x louder every 10db)
cold swan
It was a joke.
cold swan
4head.
fiery coral
There was a succubus in the 100 series
cold swan
Nice.
fiery coral
She was alergic to clothing
cold swan
Gonna read that one.
fiery coral
And made everyone want to fuck her
cold swan
🤤 🤤 🤤
fiery coral
Originally no
cold swan
I thought it was that originally.
silk trail
Apparently it takes 1,208,925,819,614,629,174,706,176 cakes to render the earth uninhabitable.
cold swan
It's been awhile since I looked at demons.
hollow granite
I mean
Around the 16 billioni mark it's becoming questionable the ability for mankind to eat them all
silk trail
That's like, less than 2 cakes a person
fiery coral
Originally succubus collected sperm from men in sleep and transgered it to some goblins that I forgot the name off that transfered it to women in sleep and then they gave birth to cursed children
cold swan
More than.
fiery coral
*transfered
cold swan
Oh I thought the process killed them.
silk trail
There are almost 9 billion people now?
cold swan
No 8.
fiery coral
What were those goblins called wait
silk trail
Oh.
silk trail
I was off by a billion.
cold swan
That's a pretty big margin of error
silk trail
.>
fiery coral
Incubus
hollow granite
"Yes, Procedure 110-Montauk is as horrible as you have heard, which is why only Class D Personnel are authorized to carry it out. Yes, it does involve brutal [REDACTED]."
OwO
silk trail
To exponential cakes, it's just another day.
fiery coral
So ye there is succubus and incubus
cold swan
Well at 16b it'd go to 32b.
silk trail
Brylyth, that scip generated a lot of good tales that actually get into the [REDACTED] part.
cold swan
I get the redacted stuff is cool.
But at times I'd rather read it.
Ngl.
It seems like a bit of a cop out.
Imo.
fiery coral
I like [redacted] with my gf
fiery coral
hollow granite
You don't always want to redact the obvious.
You need to have it be something that makes you go "wait, what are they hiding..."
Well, sometimes, anyways.
cold swan
I like [REDACTED] with my [REDACTED].
fiery coral
Kinky
cold swan
I [REDACTED].
fiery coral
Want some [redacted]
hollow granite
[REDACTED] Girlfriend
silk trail
A guy just DMed me asking for a knuckle sandwich and I found this image. It needs to be made into a scip. https://i.chzbgr.com/full/5511322624/h04CD7469/
cold swan
🤔 🤔 🤔
silk trail
Lucky.
cold swan
Well.
Not really.
It's not for a happy reason lmfao.
Though Fokka does give me cat pics upon occasion which are nice.
fiery coral
Same
silk trail
On occasion I get people asking me to unban them from Tarkov because that's apparently something i'm able to do.
quaint stag
During the glory of TTC I had to deal with an alleged scammer.
This guy went from African American gangster to Medieval Crusader and then back to African American Gangster.
silk trail
:MuhaStruggle: https://i.gyazo.com/9a008a176df45b1832854ba748f1e125.png
quaint stag
lmao
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/255079065084624896/590039784894758929/unknown.png
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/255079065084624896/590039695715467284/unknown.png
silk trail
I love when trolls put in effort. That's great.
quaint stag
silk trail
rofl
quaint stag
I had a hard time understanding it...
silk trail
AHH A MOTH JUST CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND FLEW INTO MY FACE
quaint stag
lmao
silk trail
How did it even get into my room ;_;
quaint stag
As someone who fucking loathes spiders...
I once went to sleep eyeing on that was in the corner of my room
I got up 20 minutes later to take a piss
And it was gone
nope nope nope nope
silk trail
I kept a spider buddy in my room recently because I had a fly problem. It took care of my fly problem.
hollow granite
I once had a spider move into an empty cider bottle in my room
And it was kinda sad because it looked like it wasn't doing okay
So I would literally hunt down flies
Kill them with one of those mesh electric thingies
And drop them in for it
And occasionally roll a couple drops of water in to make sure it stayed hydrated
One night I had some weird dreams involving it, where it was going to town on an earthworm.
When I woke up, it was sort of... scrabbling around nonspecifically at the glass, looking distressed
When it noticed me it started scrabbling at me
silk trail
nope.jpg
hollow granite
So I turned the bottle so that I was looking at it through the opening
silk trail
AHHH
hollow granite
And it crawled out and went off into my room
silk trail
Lights match
hollow granite
This was years ago, so, ya know, it can't possibly still be alive
But I hope that it's, like, chill AF offspring are still in the house somewhere
I'm super chill about spiders for the most part
Black widows... well.. I don't want them in my house, but they won't give me a heart attack.
silk trail
Black widows haven't killed anybody in decades
hollow granite
Yeah
You have to piss them the fuck off to get them to bite, and it'll just make you nonspecifically ill
silk trail
I'm just gonna leave this here for you. https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/c1eadn/tifu_by_eating_bugs_my_entire_life_and_having_a/
quaint stag
Yeah I don't want to click on that
silk trail
That whole thread is gold
quaint stag
shudders
silk trail
The top mod comment lol https://i.gyazo.com/27d6a9f8f43ab8c2db214bbac60def9f.png
fiery coral
S n e k
hollow granite
@silk trail Mythbusters did an episode on that kinda spider. Mild burning sensation at worst and you have to REALLY try to get them to bite a human. Also technically they aren't spiders.
silk trail
Mythbusters has been wrong multiple times, and maybe the spider you're thinking of isn't the same kind OP is referring to
fiery coral
Probably
Since this guy is uk and mythbusters are american I doubt that episode covered a uk spider
hollow granite
True, they where hella vague.
Generally speaking, though, the "daddy long legs" description refers to Opilionids (not venomous at all) or Pholcids (venomous spider)
silk trail
Still, even common spiders can give you a bite that makes you swell up a bit around the bite area
fiery coral
I mean
The only venonous spider I know of in Poland is a Krzyżak and some 'kątniki'
Krzyżak means teutonic knight btw
hollow granite
Oh, yeah, minor swelling and all, but what he described ("It was like my mouth was on fire", "I felt like my brain was going to come out")
fiery coral
This kek snek
Also remember tongue aint skin
Its like getting bitten in a muscle
dawn canopy
If someone's able to send me a 7 day key, I'd appreciate it a lot
grizzled cosmos
They don't exist, at least not right now.
rotund osprey
uhhhhh you could at least mark it as spoiler
grizzled cosmos
Arachnophobia is pretty damn common m'dude.
austere ocean
also you can look at Trypophobia 😉
fiery coral
That doesnt exist
Atleast according to 'science'
Also that spider is sm0l
And as dangerous as a mosquito
winged hearth
what are trypophobia
austere ocean
just google it)
fiery coral
its basically an irrational discomfort when you look into something with many holes
Psychiatrsits refuse to accept it as a disease because it is considered a normal behavior
*psychiatrists
left cloud
spare void
No
winged hearth
Women should need an extra license to be allowed to drive. One which requires them to learn how look left and right, for instance
Ive been hit twice in my life. Both by female humans who apparently thought 'fuckit, Ill just hook this lefty'
smoky grotto
im getting the error " file checkums does not match" upon finishing the download every time, anyone knows a fix? i reinstalled it 3 times and downloaded like 10 times
barren slate
@winged hearth Men don't do the same? Huh...
winged hearth
always thought it was a sexist stereotype, but from experience it's really not. Sure men do the same, but it's like women tunnel vision hard or something
when I see a 30-40 somethin lady in an suv I dip the fuck out. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.
barren slate
Yeah, but I've seen both male and female drivers drive on my local highways like complete morons. Merge at the last moment, speed excessively for no real reason, not letting me merge, cutting me off, etc.
winged hearth
Of course. I'm obviously not speaking absolutely
vernal tusk
someone did play dota auto chess?
keen kayak
How do you open the console to check the FPS?
grizzled cosmos
~ then fps1 or fps2
feral salmon
anyone know who i should message to change my name in discord
feral salmon
@vocal folio thanks
vocal folio
Ye
charred sonnet
guys how do i gift a game to someone?
vocal folio
@charred sonnet
go to eft.com
click on purchase as gift
youll get a code in ur email
and then give said code to ur friend
kk?
jagged field
@vocal folio what countries other than germany are fun to play in hoi4
charred sonnet
thx @vocal folio
vocal folio
ye
urban fable
if anyone knows someone in this discord who has a name of GLOCK please send me his discord or somehow get me in touch with him because he just took everything that I had in this game because I trusted him to hold my shit while I upgraded to EOD and then left the discord we were in
PLEASE
im so sad
vocal folio
why did you trust a rando
plus when you upgrade you dont need to reset
@urban fable
urban fable
if anyone could get me his discord it would be much appreciated
jagged field
nah
vocal folio
yeah thats not how this works
jagged field
gonna sleep now
jagged field
yeah, trusting random people in this game can be problematic
quaint stag
@urban fable If you have any proof of this, please PM me.
thorny flume
can anyone confirm that stalker games have any similarity to metro games?
storm chasm
Anyone with customs shortcut key willing to open it for me while I do extortionist?
Join my vc if you are
fiery coral
@thorny flume Glukhovsky based his books on the 'roadside picnic' by brothers strugacki aaandd guess what stalker is also based on the 'roadside picnic'
ez proof
storm chasm
Nvm got it
main kettle
Anyone know where I can buy a Gamma case?
grizzled cosmos
Off other players, only.
main kettle
Yea i know but is there a like channel wher people sell things
round vessel
Oh i know
cold swan
Ah I wasn't sure.
round vessel
I was just saying that never found somone jaja
trim hill
If anyone can get a recording of Schille_TTV killing you on labs please send it to me
toxic cairn
Yo bruvs join labs for a nice labs runs
smoky grotto
Please fix scroll crouching and weapons stopping to shoot with full auto.
jagged field
devs will definitely read that here
smoky grotto
I could have beaten a guy but after trying to run behind cover my good ol' pmc just decides to keep on crouching
winged hearth
Why? You were probs out of stamina from being shot
jagged field
report it as bug
winged hearth
and they already know about the shooting stopping thing, so really dont bother reporting it lol
grave birch
when you get shot, you lose stamina
smoky grotto
im getting the error " file checkums does not match" upon finishing the download every time, anyone knows a fix? i reinstalled it 3 times and downloaded like 10 times
royal current
rank? @vocal folio
smoky grotto
I wasn't getting shot, Soupy
I was about to
Also full auto randomly stopping doesn't help much either
vocal folio
@royal current never bothered going past 12
Been saving $ to get the republic
Almost have the Fredrick unlocked
vocal folio
Very
smoky grotto
i have no idea how currency and trading works in this game
i just run around as a scav trying to kill people most of the time lul
native briar
is it just me or is it weird how you get grown men in discord voice chats with kids playing together
find it fucking weird af lmao
vocal folio
Because kids lie about their age to play the game
native briar
dunno how they can be fed up with squeakers down the mic
subtle cargo
ban all squeakers
runic dragon
can someone pls help me get beta container
hushed garden
!play U got that
pale depot
anyone selling a beta/epsilon
smoky grotto
Do scavs get flashed by zarya grenades?
jagged field
should
fiery coral
zaryas are bugged af
somber mauve
So, is the game worse now? Or is it just me? Been disconnected twice already and everything seems, a bit more laggy
vocal folio
server connection lose is something with you and the server
somber mauve
And Ffs I'm trash. Couldnt hit an AI five feet away with mosin.